Tonya Ferguson sells house to travel for doTerra

[salex]

Tonya's RV has been in the shop for 7 days.....

I wonder why they didn't have it looked over by an RV mechanic before they bought it, if it was going to be a full time living arrangement. I always took used cars to a mechanic to check out before purchasing one.

Oh well.

[Cartmann99]

Tonya's RV has been in the shop for 7 days.....

I wonder why they didn't have it looked over by an RV mechanic before they bought it, if it was going to be a full time living arrangement. I always took used cars to a mechanic to check out before purchasing one.

Oh well.

God himself picked out this RV for the Ferguson family and getting it checked out beforehand would be a sign that this family did not have faith in His perfect plan for them. :whistle:

I see that she's upset that people are buying essential oils from Amazon instead of buying from someone who has studied for decades years months several hours who can read you the doTerra sales literature guide you in the proper use of essential oils. :roll:

[DaffyDill]

My ex cheated on me with a co-worker, just like Tonya's Dale did, and like Tonya, I had to decide what to do. Whether to throw what had been a great relationship away, or try to save it.

If anyone had asked me before it happened, what I would do if someone cheated on me, I would have immediately told them that I would end the relationship, without a doubt. And I meant it. When it actually happened though, I was shocked to find that for me, it was not that simple. Not that easy at all.

So, after much thought and soul searching, we decided to continue on. Yes, I was hurt, devastatingly so. I felt foolish, betrayed, ruined beyond measure. Angry, furious - I'm ashamed to admit I hit him, I shouted, I name-called, I ranted and railed, and sobbed and cried until there were no more tears. And just he took all of it - I guess he knew he deserved it, or to expect it.

I told him he had to earn my trust back, and that earning my trust was a process that would take as long as it took. I had no idea - a week? A month? A year? No idea. But what we'd had before this was so worth keeping. He did everything I asked. If he went to a friend's house and I stayed home, he would have their wife confirm he was there (although very few people knew why he had to call home all the time). And what time he left so I knew when he'd be home. He accounted for every minute of his time, every single day to show me he was trying. Over time I began to feel secure again.

We talked, discussed and dealt with everything, and one day I realised things were good again. The part relevant to Tonya though, is that I knew instinctively I couldn't bring his cheating up again and again, every time we had an argument, or I didn't get my way. We were never going to work if I was constantly throwing it in his face. We both agreed to work at resurrecting the relationship, and we both had to do things in order to succeed and move forward.

Reminding Dale of his transgression all the time means she is not over it. She hasn't moved past it; neither of them will or can, until she lets it go. If she doesn't, I seriously doubt their marriage will continue much longer. There is nothing to be gained by making Dale not only pay, but pay oh-so-publically for what he did - and now to take the whole sordid mess on television? Puhleeese....

I'm starting to think subconsciously perhaps she's driving and pushing him to end it so she can start playing the poor abandoned mother-of-four. So much sympathy to be gained there, if she forces Dale to walk out. Much more than if she had left him. She is all about appearances, that girl. It doesn't matter if the inside is a festering wound of resentment, as long as everything looks peachy keen to the outside world.

ETA: Phew, it's kind of exhausting getting all that out again, somewhat cathartic though

[salex]

Reminding Dale of his transgression all the time means she is not over it. She hasn't moved past it; neither of them will or can, until she lets it go. If she doesn't, I seriously doubt their marriage will continue much longer. There is nothing to be gained by making Dale not only pay, but pay oh-so-publically for what he did - and now to take the whole sordid mess on television? Puhleeese....

I'm starting to think subconsciously perhaps she's driving and pushing him to end it so she can start playing the poor abandoned mother-of-four. So much sympathy to be gained there, if she forces Dale to walk out. Much more than if she had left him. She is all about appearances, that girl. It doesn't matter if the inside is a festering wound of resentment, as long as everything looks peachy keen to the outside world.

I think you are spot on as far as how she has gone into this. WIthout going back to dig up her original posts, I believe she was told it would take time and work and she just wrote and wrote about it on her blog, "prayed" and suddenly, God fixed everything. Oh, other than public humiliation sessions for Dale on an ever greater scale (call in the friends and neighbors and tell them, have a white dress wedding, be interviewed by the national press.

The moment in the last few days that she told her mother in law that neither she nor Dale would ever forget his cheating I thought "wow, how loving you must be."

I don't know if her type of churches give her benefits for being an abandoned wife, or if they are the kinds of churches that expect the wife to keep her husband and view cheating as a sign she is just not trying hard enough.

Longest term scenario I can see for him staying if she doesn't quit harping on it is until the kids are 18 or some of them are. Sharing custody with Tonya on any level would be a nightmare, and she would be a vindictive bitch about it--not that she isn't now, but imagine her methods to keep him from seeing the kids to punish him while keeping them from evil influcences... and she'd no doubt write about it.

I also can't imagine being one of their kids and having to know all this stuff (and no doubt urged on some level to take sides)

[lawfulevil]

I think you're right, DaffyDill. I think they're driving each other, but it's not working, because in both of their minds, only the "bad guy" ends the marriage- no matter what, because Jesus. Unlike you and your guy, I wouldn't put money on these two still loving each other. It's just this terrible standoff with their kids as hostages, because both of them refuse to be the "bad guy". Life just keeps degrading because the only reason they even pretend to tolerate one another is Jesus and family. It's anyone's bet who will break first, I guess. Trapped between two narcissists, what a childhood.

Just get a damn divorce!

[DaffyDill]

I think you're right, DaffyDill. I think they're driving each other, but it's not working, because in both of their minds, only the "bad guy" ends the marriage- no matter what, because Jesus. Unlike you and your guy, I wouldn't put money on these two still loving each other. It's just this terrible standoff with their kids as hostages, because both of them refuse to be the "bad guy". Life just keeps degrading because the only reason they even pretend to tolerate one another is Jesus and family. It's anyone's bet who will break first, I guess. Trapped between two narcissists, what a childhood.

Just get a damn divorce!

Luckily for us, we didn't have kids at the time, so it was simpler in that respect. Even if we did though, I would have done anything to keep them out of it, as children love both parents and it isn't fair to load adult problems onto their little shoulders. My ex had three young daughters who I was extremely close to (still am!) and I don't think they know about it to this day.

We did go on to have 2 sons and were happy for years, but eventually split up for reasons that were nothing to do with what happened years ago, and we still have a certain amount of respect for one another as people.

I agree that as soon as one or two of the kids turn 18, Dale is going to be out of there. I wouldn't even be surprised if he leaves before that, either. There is a limit to how much a person can take, and Tonya's constant emotional beating on him has to be taking a toll as it borders on abuse. I agree too, that she would be the ex-wife from hell should they split, because then she would really let fly with all that pent up resentment. I know Tonya wants the world to feel sorry for her as The Wronged Wife, but I have a fair amount of sympathy for Dale.

[GeoBQn]

Not only has the motorhome been in the shop for 7 days, but also UPS lost a key part for fixing it. They've been split among three houses and wearing the same few clothes.

[lawfulevil]

Maybe God is telling you to get an apartment in Wichita, Tonya. :lol:

You notice how the tiniest coincidence can be a Sign from God that they should completely turn their lives upside down, but once they've decided to fuck up everything, no amount of setbacks (even severe setbacks that might make rational people rethink their plans) will change their minds? And these setbacks are never also signs from God. They might be coincidence, or Satan interfering, but they're clearly not God telling you not to do whatever stupid goddamn thing you're hellbent on doing. No, that couldn't be it!

[Firiel]

Maybe God is telling you to get an apartment in Wichita, Tonya. :lol:

You notice how the tiniest coincidence can be a Sign from God that they should completely turn their lives upside down, but once they've decided to fuck up everything, no amount of setbacks (even severe setbacks that might make rational people rethink their plans) will change their minds? And these setbacks are never also signs from God. They might be coincidence, or Satan interfering, but they're clearly not God telling you not to do whatever stupid goddamn thing you're hellbent on doing. No, that couldn't be it!

SATAN INTERFERING.

That was one of the main things that made me rethink conservative Christianity. I started to notice that if something was traditionally acceptable in conservative circles then any coincidence was "God opening a door." If it was something less acceptable, then it was "Satan trying to distract you." You randomly run into a very nice Christian man even though you've been focusing on being happy while single? God is opening a door! You meet a very nice non-Christian man and start falling for each other while you've been focusing on being happy while single? Satan is trying to trap you!

[Kessala]

I don't see anything good coming out of the Ferguson's knee-jerk reaction to sell off their property and deciding to live in a motorhome while shilling essential oils for a "living". So that means Dale is either taking an unpaid leave of absence or quit his insurance job entirely. What is this family of six doing for health insurance if neither one has a real job? Tonya probably thinks having essential oils (and God) will cure anything.

Those big RVs are prone to mechanical problems. I foresee their family living out of that motorhome while it's parked at a mechanic's place somewhere in the middle of no-where while they wait for a part to arrive.

Living out of an RV for vacation? Fine and fun. Living out of an RV as your home? Nutso!

[Kessala]

Am I the only one who's noticed the oldest daughter, Destiny, has been missing from two of the RV interior photos Tonya has posted. Both times it's because "Destiny was in the back napping".

I suspect she's the kind of child who has a lot of headaches and has to go lie down. I was that kid too. I can't IMAGINE being a headache person and being squished into a motorhome with three younger siblings and their noise and pestering. And the constant motion. And that flimsy, playhouse of a bathroom.

Oh - wait - I forget. Because God.

[Grimalkin]

Am I the only one who's noticed the oldest daughter, Destiny, has been missing from two of the RV interior photos Tonya has posted. Both times it's because "Destiny was in the back napping".

I suspect she's the kind of child who has a lot of headaches and has to go lie down. I was that kid too. I can't IMAGINE being a headache person and being squished into a motorhome with three younger siblings and their noise and pestering. And the constant motion. And that flimsy, playhouse of a bathroom.

Oh - wait - I forget. Because God.

It's odd how two of the most incredibly vane (sp?) women we discuss choose to live in an RV? Not much space for makeup and clothes. O pY one bathroom. Not much space to primp.

[DaffyDill]

It's odd how two of the most incredibly vane (sp?) women we discuss choose to live in an RV? Not much space for makeup and clothes. O pY one bathroom. Not much space to primp.

Vain 8-)

And it is odd that Tonya and Jill would choose to do this RV thing...given their fondness for, well, themselves and their appearance.

Maybe it means they had less choice in adopting the RV life than they lead us to believe...

[Coco]

Vain 8-)

And it is odd that Tonya and Jill would choose to do this RV thing...given their fondness for, well, themselves and their appearance.

Maybe it means they had less choice in adopting the RV life than they lead us to believe...

on the other hand, less house maintenance = more primp time, especially with the slaves doing the actual cleaning work. And we know Jill basically commandeered a majority of space for her baubles and cosmetics.

[DGayle]

I'm interested in the fulltiming RV culture for myself and doing as much homework as I can as I try to (painfully...gradually) work towards owning my own, knowing how to fix it, etc. I read forums, go to a show, and do all I can to make sure this is right for me. Buying used, they suggest paying an RV mechanic to come out an inspect before you buy, and really recommend you be a bit handy OR have a stash to put into getting the RV fixed if it's got issues.

I still can't process what was running through their heads when they made the choice to get this. They got a diesel pusher. A diesel pusher with problems. Oh my god.

:popcorn2: Wellp.

Don't do it if you have kids. Please. Don't.

Signed,

Been there, done that

[Discobiscuits]

Don't do it if you have kids. Please. Don't.

Signed,

Been there, done that

Never had 'em and never will. Don't worry!

...Well, maybe I'll bring one of those little four-legged furry kids, but not the human kind! :wink-kitty:

[DGayle]

Never had 'em and never will. Don't worry!

...Well, maybe I'll bring one of those little four-legged furry kids, but not the human kind! :wink-kitty:

In THAT case, have fun! :D It's an adventure without kids, but heartbreaking with them.

[lawfulevil]

In THAT case, have fun! :D It's an adventure without kids, but heartbreaking with them.

This is an elegant summary of all the reasons I didn't reproduce- 0 tiny helpless people depend on me to have my shit together.

{L_MESSAGE_HIDDEN}:

(Totally not a judgment on you, DGayle- sometimes things falling apart is completely unavoidable and not your fault- I personally do not have my shit together and know I wouldn't make a good mother).

[Koala]

Maybe it means they had less choice in adopting the RV life than they lead us to believe...

I believe that's the one...can't imagine anyone would willingly sell their home and cram their children into such a tiny space

[lawfulevil]

Haha Tonya, you're so right! YOLO!

[Cartmann99]

Thought I'd check and see how the Ferguson family was getting along. One of her commenters asked how they are liking RV life. Here's her response:

4 little Fergusons We are madly in love! Best decision we have made to date. All family, all the time, just like we wanted.

Uh huh, sure. Six people and one bathroom sounds just dreamy to me. :roll:

facebook.com/4littleFergusons/photos/a.824273040967084.1073741974.252445584816502/879046238823097/?type=1

[DaffyDill]

Thought I'd check and see how the Ferguson family was getting along. One of her commenters asked how they are liking RV life. Here's her response:

Uh huh, sure. Six people and one bathroom sounds just dreamy to me. :roll:

facebook.com/4littleFergusons/photos/a.824273040967084.1073741974.252445584816502/879046238823097/?type=1

Translation:

We are madly in love! Best decision I we have made to date. All family, all the time, with no harlot office job-type women to lure Dale away, just like I we wanted.

[Cartmann99]

Translation:

We are madly in love! Best decision I we have made to date. All family, all the time, with no harlot office job-type women to lure Dale away, just like I we wanted.

That was my second thought. I bet she's got him on an extremely tight leash right now.

[Coco]

That was my second thought. I bet she's got him on an extremely tight leash right now.

but not his thoughts or feelings. :fyingpan:

[salex]

I suspect he has a countdown clock in his head until his kids are 18-- or maybe 16ish and can decide where they want to spend weekends.

"Only 7 years, 4 months and 3 days to go" sort of thing..... :cry: