Church stops funeral for lesbian woman

[RosyDaisy]

http://www.waff.com/story/27845045/churchs-last-minute-decision-to-stop-funeral-for-gay-woman-angers-family?clienttype=generic&mobilecgbypass

This happened because a video memorial had a shot of the deceased kissing her wife. WTH did the minister wait until just before the service to do this? Fuck him!

[browncoatslytherin]

from what i read when the story first broke, the video tape was given to the church a week in advance of the service. so...surely he not only knew the deceased was gay, but he should have known there would have been objectionable material in it (objectionable to him) and he should have told them then to find somewhere else and given them back the money they paid for it. i hope they refund them! that's just ridiculous and totally disrespectful. :(

[Mama Mia]

I've read a few different versions. The least horrific one is that the Pastor knew the family, and knew that the woman was in a same sex marriage. Prior to the funeral they were told by the church funeral director that a slideshow that showed the couple kissing was unacceptable and that they would need to remove the slide. The family refused and so were told the funeral would have to be not in the chapel, but in the funeral home across the way. The same Pastor still held the service.

The whole thing is weird.

[Lissa1481]

I've read a few different versions. The least horrific one is that the Pastor knew the family, and knew that the woman was in a same sex marriage. Prior to the funeral they were told by the church funeral director that a slideshow that showed the couple kissing was unacceptable and that they would need to remove the slide. The family refused and so were told the funeral would have to be not in the chapel, but in the funeral home across the way. The same Pastor still held the service.

The whole thing is weird.

That is what I heard too. This is fairly close to us so it's been in the news a lot.

I suppose if that's really how the church feels, that's their choice. But they should have said so immediately and not wait until 15 minutes before the service. That's completely wrong.

[Mama Mia]

That is what I heard too. This is fairly close to us so it's been in the news a lot.

I suppose if that's really how the church feels, that's their choice. But they should have said so immediately and not wait until 15 minutes before the service. That's completely wrong.

From what I got from the one story ( no clue if it's the most accurate) , the family had already been told to remove the photo previously. They didn't. When the funeral director saw it right before the service that's when he said the service needed to be moved.

It sounds like this church is even well known for being particularly anti-gay. The whole thing is so strange. Unless maybe it's the church the woman's parents went to? Or she attended as a kid? Otherwise - I just don't get it. Although I'm sure the family was in shock, so maybe just didn't research at all and assumed it was okay since they knew the Pastor?

[fundiefan]

That church has created its own god and its own rules.

May they rot in hell. If it exists.

[DGayle]

The church accepted money for the service. They refused to perform it. They are extremely in the wrong, need to refund the money (the surviving wife says they have not, and she backs that it was cancelled when they refused to edit the slide show since they didn't want an edited version of the woman's life shown), as well as pay additional money for breeching the contract.

[Jana814]

That church has created its own god and its own.

Agree!

[SoSoNosy]

The church charged for having a funeral there? Is that common in some areas?

[RosyDaisy]

This would not have happened at my church. We welcome LGBT, and our ministers don't charge, and allow other ministers to officiate if that's what the family wants.

The church should return the money to the family. That's thievery!

[ExMW]

Ugh, this so sounds like something my ex would do. The church should definitely return the money they took for the funeral back to the family.

[SquirrelySquirrel]

I am absolutely not victim blaming here, but I'm really curious as to why they wanted a funeral to be held there if they knew it was not a place that would welcome them. It was an appalling act to kick them out, no question. But that would be the last place I'd give my business too, if I had knowledge beforehand.

[Mama Mia]

I am absolutely not victim blaming here, but I'm really curious as to why they wanted a funeral to be held there if they knew it was not a place that would welcome them. It was an appalling act to kick them out, no question. But that would be the last place I'd give my business too, if I had knowledge beforehand.

My thought is that the family was overwhelmed and distraught ( naturally). Especially since it was apparently a suicide, and she left two young children. So understandably probably weren't thinking too clearly. The minister who was to perform the service ( or did perform it, depending which account) was a family friend. It sounds like he offered, they accepted and they arranged the funeral. But then the video they chose was over-ruled by some supervising higher up funeral director at the church. They were either told to remove it ahead of time, or at the last minute ( again depending on which account) . It was still there when service was about to start so insensitive director said they had to move across the street.

I can't imagine how awful it would be to be dealing with your mom/ wife/daughter/sister dying by suicide and then to have funeral drama on top of it! Awful.