Sparkling Lauren, a super special sparkling surrogacy and a "gayby"

[Marianne]

Nine I don't know -don't have a nine year old but I don't think I would have been much older than that when I read it, but it was in conjuction with a love of history and understanding about the holocaust (actualyy maybe I was older than nine). It's not a story just to read.

It's definitely not a bed time story I'd read to my 6 and 8 year olds. We're busy with Roald Dahl and Enid Blyton. Non-fiction at bedtime - not fun!

I do not think that's wrong. When I was 9, I was passionate by the Holocaust. I read a lot books in this period and they greatly influenced me.

"If This Is a Man" by Primo Levi". This is THE book that accompanied me throughout my life. When I read it at 9/10 years, I have been interested by how a concentration camp work. At 12/13 I started to understand the psychological torture that it represented. Later, I realized the literary references to Dante, etc ... Seriously, I read this book every year, and I discovered a new level of play every time, and I cry every time. It's a book who is accessible at 9 years old for a mature children.

The Diary of Anne Frank ... I do not want to be offensive and this is very personal, but it never touched me beyond the "fuck, she died because of the Holocaust. She never have lived. " I read it at 9, 14 and 18, and at no time have I been very emotional. Maybe because people have speak about it like it was THE book that will devastate me ? I understand why some people were deeply moved by it, but, personnaly no. I cried at the end, of course, but... I don't know. This is disturbing.

If I wanted to explain the Holocaust at my daughter, I would make her read "if This is a man", for a teenager, I would give a book about or from Hans and Sophie Scholl, they are great exemple for teenager.

For a five years old NO, just NO ! You can't do this.

I find it hypocrite. The images of cows in uniform of concentration camp ARE anti-Semitic. A 100%. They are offensive, disrespectful and they use anti-Semitic imagery. If Lauren supports this artist, she supports someone who is anti-Semite. A most pernicious anti-Semitism, but anti-Semitism anyway. To make read the "diary of Anne Frank" to a girl while making her attend anti-Semitic people, and by inculcating that there is no difference between a Jew, a homosexual, Roms (or any other category of persons deported ) and a cow, it's hypocritical. Assume, Lauren. I quote here the amazing tumblr "This is not jewish"

One of the main ways the Nazis dehumanized Jews and Rroma was by depicting them as, comparing them to, and outright defining them as animals. When you follow the Nazis’ lead and compare those victims to animals (let alone animals religious Jews consider impure, what the fuck), you are slapping every last fucking one of those victims in the face.

Furthermore, almost none of those victims, if any at all, were vegan—and many of them were butchers or shochets (Jewish animal slaughterers). Thus, not only are you dehumanizing and minimizing the experience of Jews and Rroma in the Holocaust by calling them animals, you are also outright saying that they were morally equivalent to the people who mass-murdered them. No. Fuck you.

Animals are farmed for a legitimate purpose: to be eaten (as well as for leather, milk, and other products). You may not like that purpose, you may disagree with it, but there is a purpose. The Holocaust’s only purpose was the wholesale eradication of Jews and Rroma from the face of the earth. Even if animals and humans were in fact interchangeable, animal slaughter and the Holocaust would still not be morally equivalent.

(...)

If you can’t champion animal rights without trampling on actual human beings, you need to sit down, shut up, and let the adults talk. Period.

http://this-is-not-jewish.tumblr.com/po ... son-of-the (great tumblr, read it entirely if you can)

[chaotic life]

Thank you, Marianne. That touched on so much of what bothers me about Lauren's current parenting fails that I couldn't articulate myself. I'm really bothered that she's reading Anne Frank to a five year old *and* planning on taking that same five year old to tour Anne Frank's house.

I totally, totally get why Jews teach their children about the holocaust very young. The US Holocaust museum has no age restrictions on Jewish children to visit. However, non-Jewish children are recommended to be at least 12 before going, for the simple fact that the Holocaust was extremely disturbing. If you water it down, you lose the ability to leave the impression of the horror of it, and if you don't water it down you rob young children of their innocence.

[FJismyheadship]

Oh yeah no, I wouldn't read Diary of Anne Frank to a five year old. I don't remember it touching upon anything inappropriate for a preeteen/teen, but yeah five years old is too young.

[Marianne]

Thank you, Marianne. That touched on so much of what bothers me about Lauren's current parenting fails that I couldn't articulate myself. I'm really bothered that she's reading Anne Frank to a five year old *and* planning on taking that same five year old to tour Anne Frank's house.

I totally, totally get why Jews teach their children about the holocaust very young. The US Holocaust museum has no age restrictions on Jewish children to visit. However, non-Jewish children are recommended to be at least 12 before going, for the simple fact that the Holocaust was extremely disturbing. If you water it down, you lose the ability to leave the impression of the horror of it, and if you don't water it down you rob young children of their innocence.

Plus, I guess that the US Holocaust museum shows image of the Shoah and the death camp. There is a huge difference between "speaking with your young kids about the death camp" and "showing to your young kids image of corpses who are going to be burnt". Every child have his own tolerance when he see violent and disturbing pictures, and a parents should know this tolerance, and ask the child before ("What you are going to see is very violent, and disturbing. Do you think you are ready to see it, or do you want to wait a little ? I don't want you to be affraid." I'm married to a woman who have suffered severe PTSD when she was young, because her grandmother show her horrific image of the Shoah when she was 6, and forced to watch a horrible documentary, which included cremation, public executions, and long zoom on bodies that looked like skeletons. She has still nightmare about it and is still unable to face violent image or war image.

The teaching of the Holocaust should be adapted to the level of maturity of every kids. Obviously, Lauren is not doing this.

[chaotic life]

I was fascinated and drawn to the Holocaust as a child. I was constantly searching for how my family escaped (well, all but my great-grandparents anyway) and thus I sought out high levels of information at very young ages. You are correct that the US Holocaust Museum has graphic details. They also have a hall of shoes, which is approximately three stories of shoes and other artifacts that were removed from corpses in the concentration camps, as well as the autopsy tables used to strip the corpses of anything of value.

I think it's important to teach children, yes. I think it's important for *my* children to know and understand. There's no way I would ever be reading and teaching it to my FIVE year old child. But, as you said, I would also never find it acceptable to compare animals to holocaust victims simply to encourage (and potentially traumatize) my young child to stay committed to being vegan.

[Alexandra]

I wanted to temporarily de-lurk to comment on lauren and her unschooling.

Hi, everyone! :-)

The thing that bugs me more than anything about laurens unschooling is that her life has SUCH great potential. As a homeschooling mother, I am envious of all the travel lauren can do. Do you know how much i'd love to travel that much with my daughter? The other thing is that ALL it would take for the girls- at such a young age- is about two hours of seat work. THAT'S IT. Because they are so young, they could get language arts and math done in that time frame. They are so young that lauren COULD continue unschooling history and science for the time being. All she'd need to do is add in some documentaries, read-aloud books on history and science concepts, a globe to their home(to learn geography), etc. She could have private time with Aisha two or three times a week and they could get lost on the internet reading about a country of Aisha's choice- there is geography, done in an hour! It would be so SIMPLE to give the girls a good education- homeschooling when they are young does not require a lot of time, but she won't even give them those two hours. If she gave them those hours they desperately need, they could be really well-educated, because Laurens ability to travel could really supplement their education. Such wonderful opportunities lost. It makes me sad, because while Lauren frustrates me to no end, the life she lives could be a really wonderful one. Instead she chooses neglect every day.

[Marianne]

I was fascinated and drawn to the Holocaust as a child. I was constantly searching for how my family escaped (well, all but my great-grandparents anyway) and thus I sought out high levels of information at very young ages. You are correct that the US Holocaust Museum has graphic details. They also have a hall of shoes, which is approximately three stories of shoes and other artifacts that were removed from corpses in the concentration camps, as well as the autopsy tables used to strip the corpses of anything of value.

I think it's important to teach children, yes. I think it's important for *my* children to know and understand. There's no way I would ever be reading and teaching it to my FIVE year old child. But, as you said, I would also never find it acceptable to compare animals to holocaust victims simply to encourage (and potentially traumatize) my young child to stay committed to being vegan.

In all country, there is a lot of association who have age-adapted equipment to teach children about holocaust. They are usually for school, but individual can call them, and use it. Lauren could have done it.

Plus, holocaust don't come from nothing. There's no way that a 5 years old can understand the complex historical process who lead us to the Shoah. i don't say we should teach an detailed history of anti-semitism, just, context is important.

It is also important to teach children that yes, this horrible things happened, but there were good people who try to change things (and who win). hans and Sophie Scholl, my greatgrandfather (spanish republican, member of the resistance) were my hero when I was a teenager. We can not teach our children only about darkness. They need to see the light.

[OneFifthQuiverFull]

For someone who rotates from camp site to camp site she sure moves quickly - she must be on the interwebs 24/7. I wrote a nasty comment calling her out for her laziness guised as "new age" and "enlightened" and she blocked me within 10 minutes.

[utter solitude]

The problem with Lauren reading Anne Frank to her daughters isn't just that they're young, it's that they don't have the context to it, because that would require Lauren to actually teach something!

It's one thing to have developed a passion on your own, or for your child to have and read such a book, and then do further research and reading on the subject. But that's not what's happening with Lauren. She's reading this to them like it's a casual story, comparing it to slaughtering cows, and then saying "Oh we can visit this girl's house later this year!" like it's nothing.

It's disgusting and insulting to those who suffered, and is going to end up leaving the girls, especially the younger ones, with a skewed view. It's somewhat likely they'll never get a good perspective on it.

Edited for riffles

[chaotic life]

No worries, I'm sure Lauren thinks mass murders and evil men are a neutral event--the same as murdering their six month old brother.

But the COWS.... Now that is morally repugnant...except of course when the great sparkling one wants her dairy and meat fix. Good thing she has a child to have morals for her at such times.

[chaotic life]

Totally missed that she is touting her own horn again on Facebook with a study about gestational surrogates and how they are so wonderful.

Kinda negates her point when you realizes she is NOT a gestational surrogate at all but a traditional surrogate, and the same research she is using to toot her horn has shown a MUCH different perspective when it comes to traditional surrogates.

[thoughtful]

Lauren writes:

Brioni has made her own little movie. Using Hungry Shark, she’s narrated the shark’s voice with subtle humour as it tears through schools of fish and the occasional swimmer. We record it carefully to share with others later on, especially our good friend Ben who originally created the fish graphics on the app.

Yes, Ben in Iceland, father of the non-brother-half-brother-to-be of Brioni, designed the graphics, so Hungry Shark is practically family! :roll:

Besides not being something I'd count as part of a child's educational day, there may be some other issues with this activity. The game, although unrealistically animated, is quite violent, and recommended for ages 12+ due to that. This is the link in Lauren's post:

https://itunes.apple.com/au/app/hungry- ... 00008?mt=8

And some visual images from the game are under the spoiler (Arndts should not see the first one!):

So, for her vegan child whose father drowned her brother, more violent images, animals being eaten and destroyed (granted, by other animals), people being ripped up by a gleeful shark, blood spurts, danger in and from the water, and mixed messages all over.

As ever, it's the sum total of what Lauren does that makes this bother me -- if some other parent, whose child had not experienced the horror and loss Brioni has, let their under-12-year-old play this game, I don't think it would concern me quite as much (even though I generally hate violent images and ideas for games - give me Tumblebugs and Coffee Rush anytime).

I wonder if Lauren would approve of it, if it weren't for the fact that she's all starry-eyed over the Iceland men.

I haven't seen the game in action, but it looks to me like the player is on the side of the shark, trying to get it to "evolve" to larger and stronger forms. Maybe Lauren is just trying to lure Brioni back to being a carnivore! :shhh: :wink-penguin:

[ILoveJellybeans]

Sooooooooo a game where you play as a shark and kill other animals and people is a good game for a 6 year old vegan whose brother was drowned in a river by their dad........

Lauren really doesn't have a clue, does she?

[haras1972]

Has Lauren ever blogged about when this travelling unschooling life might end? Like if Aisha decides she really wants to play netball, join Scouts, learn the piano, etc.

Or discovers she's naturally competitive and wants to join a swimming/running team.

Or starts to express an interest in becoming an architect/doctor like her aunt/engineer, all of which assume a long history of education in maths/biology/statistics/trigonometry/geometry/science/research/and so on and so on. Surely most unschooling parents recognise that at some point the student is going to have to learn some things by rote, be taught subjects that they may not like, if that subject matter is critical to their expressed interest in a career path. Not all learning can be by sheer interest alone?

[MajorMajor]

So I don't think anyone mentioned this but Lauren's kids have had lice for years. I can't conclusively say it's been a constant thing, but she mentions lice outbreaks on her blog a number of times over the course of a few years, including before Elijah died.

[DaffyDill]

Has Lauren ever blogged about when this travelling unschooling life might end? Like if Aisha decides she really wants to play netball, join Scouts, learn the piano, etc.

Or discovers she's naturally competitive and wants to join a swimming/running team.

Or starts to express an interest in becoming an architect/doctor like her aunt/engineer, all of which assume a long history of education in maths/biology/statistics/trigonometry/geometry/science/research/and so on and so on.

I think, that if one of the girls started talking about going to evil school, or even just staying in one place to join a sporting club, or just a have chance to make some friends of her own, Lauren would procrastinate for months telling the poor kid she isn't "walking in righteousness" or whatever the damn buzzwords are for that week.

If that didn't work, and the child insisted on sticking to her guns, Lauren would just offload her onto whichever family member was geographically closest at the time, and disappear on her happy, hippy way with the other three. Of course then it would be up to the family to work out who was best to care for the girl etc. Lauren wouldn't contribute financially to whoever cared for the child, either. Hopefully the family member would go to Centrelink and at least have Lauren's fortnightly benefits for that child stopped.

Lauren may well consider herself too enlightened and sparkly to be brought down by continuing much of a relationship with an unenlightened child wanting to living in negativity, and who she may perceive as reflecting badly on her in front of her leghumpers. This scenario would also be seen as a failure of the child, not Lauren herself or her parenting/lifestyle.

[Mama Mia]

I think Aisha really wants a more mainstream environment, based on things Lauren has said in posts. It must be very, very strange for Aisha who was being obsessively drilled with flash cards at 3 1/2, had scheduled nap times and everything was very structured and her mom seemed way too concerned with cleanliness and organization. So in her early years those are the values she observed and lived in - and then her mom did a complete 180.

I think she might have an educational advantage over the other girls, as she likely had reading and simple arithmetic down already and could build from their. But I think emotionally it is likely much more difficult for her to adjust.

I agree that if Aisha , or any of them, really dug in their heels about staying in one spot she'd be shipped off to a relative. But I think Lauren would just spin it as her child choosing her own path and being independent.

[DaffyDill]

I think Aisha really wants a more mainstream environment, based on things Lauren has said in posts. It must be very, very strange for Aisha who was being obsessively drilled with flash cards at 3 1/2, had scheduled nap times and everything was very structured and her mom seemed way too concerned with cleanliness and organization. So in her early years those are the values she observed and lived in - and then her mom did a complete 180.

Totally agree MM. Even though all four girls deserve so much more than the lifestyle they are now living, it's Aisha I feel for the most She is the one most likely to remember the house, the warm baths, the warm beds, the toys and games, Dad and Mum reading her stories and teaching her, and also, extended family and friends who came to stay, to visit and add to the warmth and security of her world. Eventually she was left to cope as slowly, then with ever increasing speed, all that was familiar, comfortable and secure was ripped out of her life. By two of the people she trusted and loved best. Then Elijah and Dad were suddenly gone as well.

I see Aisha as a bright little thing who would blossom given the chance. I hope that opportunity comes sooner rather than later.

I agree that if Aisha , or any of them, really dug in their heels about staying in one spot she'd be shipped off to a relative. But I think Lauren would just spin it as her child choosing her own path and being independent.

You may well be right there, too. She may really believe that, or equally, it could be a line she would spout to save face or forestall criticism of her lifestyle.

[lilith]

Did anyone notice that Lauren fed the girls who had recently been to see an artist who graphically compared slaughterhouses to WW2 concentration camps CHEESE AND BACON ROLLS for lunch on their fabulously free unschooling day? Oh Lauren......... I eat meat and dairy, but even I won't purchase pig products because the pork industry is unbelievably cruel, worse even than the battery hen industry. You fucking inauthentic wannabe hypocrite. Do you really think the supermarket you allowed your children to select those rolls from only source bacon from "happy pigs"? No wonder Aisha had a breakdown trying to make sense of your crackpot excuse for ethical eating.

[lilith]

Even if Aisha wants to return to the mainstream (and I agree that the few pieces of honesty Lauren lets slip through imply that she does), she's reaching an age where she will be too aware of her differences and too self conscious to reintegrate. I've seen this with a child close to me, who was unschooled in alternative culture much like the one Lauren dwells in, though less nomadic, and when she asked to go to school and her mother complied she only lasted a term before she gave up - her mother allowed her to attend but didn't encourage and was reluctant to alter the families routine to facilitate her daughter's school obligations, she was painfully aware of the gaps in her education and differences in lifestyle and appearance, she had little common ground or shared experience with the other kids, her mother had taught her that structure and authority were negative things...... It was just too hard, and she knew her mother would not just let her quit but praise her for making the enlightened choice, so she quit.

Conformity and being part if the group is REALLY important in early adolescence, and Lauren has been teaching her kids their whole lives that appearances and fitting in with a group matters. I don't think Aisha will be able to deal with adjusting to mainstream life and school, no matter how much she may want to.

[Annasopinion]

And if she's buying cheap supermarket rolls, I'd bet that she is also buying cheap veggie patties - ie mostly potato based, maybe a few token grains in there and a couple of pieces of peas & carrots. Also probably full of trans fats and coated with white breadcrumbs.

And this is what she SHOWED on her blog, so who knows what she's feeding those kids up with off screen? I really didn't think she'd be feeding them so poorly - not when she's got money from selling her baby and donations. I'm a bit shocked to be honest.

[Annasopinion]

Lauren is too sparkly and special for something so mundane as documentation. Besides, she's about to run away to Europe, where they will be driving across Europe, so duh of COURSE they will be learning.

Does anyone else thing Anne Frank is hardly appropriate learning material for most of her kids? I can maybe see a mature 9 year old reading Diary of Anne Frank but a five year old???

I think if they are curious in reading and knowing her life, that at 9, Aicha is old enough to deal with the Anne Frank story. But of course, it depends on the child.

What I find more interesting is that they are interested in a story (who got them onto it in the first place? they certainly aren't learning history from the looks of things) that documents a girl living a secret life, hiding from the authorities and living a life of fear. How must it feel for the girls to have a father in prison (as far as they understand, I do realise he's in mental incapacity) and be constantly on the move? And be sleeping in a small confined space and be always planning on moving elsewhere?

I'm not surprised that it sounds like they relate to her!

[lilith]

I think if they are curious in reading and knowing her life, that at 9, Aicha is old enough to deal with the Anne Frank story. But of course, it depends on the child.

What I find more interesting is that they are interested in a story (who got them onto it in the first place? they certainly aren't learning history from the looks of things) that documents a girl living a secret life, hiding from the authorities and living a life of fear. How must it feel for the girls to have a father in prison (as far as they understand, I do realise he's in mental incapacity) and be constantly on the move? And be sleeping in a small confined space and be always planning on moving elsewhere?

I'm not surprised that it sounds like they relate to her!

One of whom sleeps in cupboards whenever given the chance......

[Annasopinion]

I also think a lot about Aisha and how she is going to fare in the years ahead. Obviously they have no education and they can't stay on a touring house bus forever as they won't have enough room in a few years. But I hate to think how hard settling anywhere will be for them. I really can't see Aicha or any of the girls fitting in anywhere.

I was really taken aback by the post where a group of school kids showed up where they were and lauren described them as a herd. Instead of being interested, the girls went away and they looked shy and unconfident in the presence of other peer aged children and I find that really sad. Where is their confidence? Their assured confident manner? I also remember one of the girls being upset at some festival? because some girl teased her about her hair? From reading the blog, the impression I get is that they are not confident but are suffering low self esteem and are only comfortable when ganged together. They dress like hobos and walk around in pajamas. That might be fine for Lauren, but it also means that these girls simply wouldn't be able to fit in anywhere - like netball or groups or clubs or whatever, they are soooo out of the loop.

I really see them sliding further behind as the years go on. And Lauren has this idealised thinking that non educated children turn into geniuses....err OK. And that her girls will independently travel in the future when they are older? Like how? I'll be surprised if they'll even be able to find a job let alone travel the world. The whole thing is desperately sad. And its made worse by a welfare system that allows home schooling without any checks or balances on basic educational literacy norms.

And, possibly the worst part. How can they survive Lauren and their life if they are never exposed to normal people?

[lilith]

I also think a lot about Aisha and how she is going to fare in the years ahead. Obviously they have no education and they can't stay on a touring house bus forever as they won't have enough room in a few years. But I hate to think how hard settling anywhere will be for them. I really can't see Aicha or any of the girls fitting in anywhere.

I was really taken aback by the post where a group of school kids showed up where they were and lauren described them as a herd. Instead of being interested, the girls went away and they looked shy and unconfident in the presence of other peer aged children and I find that really sad. Where is their confidence? Their assured confident manner? I also remember one of the girls being upset at some festival? because some girl teased her about her hair? From reading the blog, the impression I get is that they are not confident but are suffering low self esteem and are only comfortable when ganged together. They dress like hobos and walk around in pajamas. That might be fine for Lauren, but it also means that these girls simply wouldn't be able to fit in anywhere - like netball or groups or clubs or whatever, they are soooo out of the loop.

I really see them sliding further behind as the years go on. And Lauren has this idealised thinking that non educated children turn into geniuses....err OK. And that her girls will independently travel in the future when they are older? Like how? I'll be surprised if they'll even be able to find a job let alone travel the world. The whole thing is desperately sad. And its made worse by a welfare system that allows home schooling without any checks or balances on basic educational literacy norms.

And, possibly the worst part. How can they survive Lauren and their life if they are never exposed to normal people?

I want to preface this by specifying that it's NOT an excuse to brag. I think it's relevant to the conversation.

A friend of mine recently took middle child, a 9 year old boy, to a Northern NSW music festival as company for her 9 year old daughter. They camped there for 5 days, and I was actually wondering if they would encounter Lauren, as she was in the area and it is the sort of event that would appeal to her. As it was during a school term ( I let my son have the time off, and even his teacher said he was a lucky boy to have the experience) most of the kids who were there were homeschooled or unschooled.

My friend got comments the whole time about how lovely our kids were to have around, how confident they were, and how well they involved themselves in the whole experience. They integrated BETTER than the "anything goes" hippie kids who were only used to moving among other families who lived the same way they do. And they came back to their city homes where their parents are cogs in the dreaded capitalist machine, and told their public school classes all about it. Kids can have diverse experiences without being isolated from society, and diverse experiences means experiencing more that what their special snowflake mother deems to be authentic that week.

I'd like to hope my kids would be kind to Lauren's if they encountered them, and I know they wouldn't be cruel, but I don't know if they could find common ground. Aisha needs friendships that are independent of her mother so badly at this age, but I don't know where she has any chance of finding them.