Michael Bates Courting!

[doubleT]

For Erin's wedding, Kelly's sisters took care of two big expenses; one did the flowers and one did the wedding cakes. (Well, one was a wedding cake and the other a birthday cake. :shock: ) I imagine both Erin's aunts did that for her as their gift to the couple maybe? Photographs are a big expense and I also noticed that they had a wedding coordinator. That is usually a expense. But maybe she was a friend of the families and did it as a gift?

[freejugar]

I think the photographer got mentioned on the blog, so it's good publicity i guess.

So they didn't pay for the food (Kelly says it was ""donated""), the cakes, the flowers, the honeymoon, maybe the photos, so it wasn't so expensive.

[Closed Womb]

For Erin's wedding, Kelly's sisters took care of two big expenses; one did the flowers and one did the wedding cakes. (Well, one was a wedding cake and the other a birthday cake. :shock: ) I imagine both Erin's aunts did that for her as their gift to the couple maybe? Photographs are a big expense and I also noticed that they had a wedding coordinator. That is usually a expense. But maybe she was a friend of the families and did it as a gift?

The church my brother and SIL married in had two (mandatory, free) wedding coordinators for events, volunteers that loved weddings (I suppose) and wanted to make sure that none of the inane rules of their precious church were broken (ie, no photographers in the church, all photos had to be from the back door and/or balcony, otherwise it ruins the purpose of the event.)

Sorry, just having a flashback. Anyway, they may have been provided by the church.

[nausicaa]

The church my brother and SIL married in had two (mandatory, free) wedding coordinators for events, volunteers that loved weddings (I suppose) and wanted to make sure that none of the inane rules of their precious church were broken (ie, no photographers in the church, all photos had to be from the back door and/or balcony, otherwise it ruins the purpose of the event.)

Sorry, just having a flashback. Anyway, they may have been provided by the church.

I think on the Bates Tumblr there was a link to Cherin's wedding photographer. It is a young woman who lives in another state and is a professional photographer who also shot Priscilla Waller's wedding. She talks of being friends with Chad and Erin separately and being so excited to shoot their wedding, so she may have done it as a gift to them.

[doubleT]

The church my brother and SIL married in had two (mandatory, free) wedding coordinators for events, volunteers that loved weddings (I suppose) and wanted to make sure that none of the inane rules of their precious church were broken (ie, no photographers in the church, all photos had to be from the back door and/or balcony, otherwise it ruins the purpose of the event.)

Sorry, just having a flashback. Anyway, they may have been provided by the church.

This is true. When I got married at my church, I was also assigned a church wedding coordinator who made sure all the churches rules were followed. Since my reception was off site, her duties ended at the church. Whereas Erin's reception was at the church so her coordinator's duties probably continued on there too.

Can not believe they got the food donated. Ug.

[formergothardite]

I can believe that they got the food donated because that seems Gil and Kelly's go to plan for their life. I think at this point they would be shocked and wouldn't know what to do if people didn't step up and give them things.

[0 kids n not countin]

I can believe that they got the food donated because that seems Gil and Kelly's go to plan for their life. I think at this point they would be shocked and wouldn't know what to do if people didn't step up and give them things.

Guess it works out fine if you have no problem serving fast-food chicken at your child's wedding reception.

[Dandruff]

Guess it works out fine if you have no problem serving fast-food chicken at your child's wedding reception.

Good point, though I think fast-food chicken may have been an improvement over what was shown.

[nausicaa]

I think on the Bates Tumblr there was a link to Cherin's wedding photographer. It is a young woman who lives in another state and is a professional photographer who also shot Priscilla Waller's wedding. She talks of being friends with Chad and Erin separately and being so excited to shoot their wedding, so she may have done it as a gift to them.

Whoops, sorry. I read "planner" as "photographer" in your original post!

[Tangy Bee]

Ok I realize this thread is old, but can I bring it back out for a few? I was over reading Zach & Whit's blog. Saw the post about Michael's courtship. Someone left a comment about Michael had been waiting a while to be asked. So it just occurred to me that she has known dude for a while now because we all know they have to be "special friends" before courtships. So this means that while people were worried about "poor" Michael having to watch 3 younger siblings get engaged/court...she had a man the whole time! Am I to guess that because of her extreme shyness is the reason she didn't have Kelly mention anything??

[sunshine]

Ok I realize this thread is old, but can I bring it back out for a few? I was over reading Zach & Whit's blog. Saw the post about Michael's courtship. Someone left a comment about Michael had been waiting a while to be asked. So it just occurred to me that she has known dude for a while now because we all know they have to be "special friends" before courtships. So this means that while people were worried about "poor" Michael having to watch 3 younger siblings get engaged/court...she had a man the whole time! Am I to guess that because of her extreme shyness is the reason she didn't have Kelly mention anything??

I read Kelly's blog and it appear that they had the typical fundie courtship, where the courtship was the annoucement...Hey, I'm interested. Are you? So, there was an attraction but it didn't appear to be similar to Erin's or even Alyssa's relationship. She was in dark about whether there will be anything more. That is what I sensed.

[singsingsing]

From Kelly's comments it sounds like she's had a huge crush on this guy for a long time and didn't realize he felt the same way until he asked her to court, which I have to admit is pretty sweet. I hope they do turn out to be a good match.

[Mela99]

So much free wedding stuff. Unreal...

Okay, FJ - who's gonna be first to donate to Mela's wedding in June? What would Jesus Do? Pay for my open bar.

[thekate]

So much free wedding stuff. Unreal...

Okay, FJ - who's gonna be first to donate to Mela's wedding in June? What would Jesus Do? Pay for my open bar.

Just make sure there's lots of water available. Wine only, no beer or spirits though.

[mausi]

Just make sure there's lots of water available. Wine only, no beer or spirits though.

But then she'd have to invite Jesus too, that water won't turn itself into wine. And from my experience he's been pretty hard to get an RSVP back from. ;)

[doubleT]

From Kelly's comments it sounds like she's had a huge crush on this guy for a long time and didn't realize he felt the same way until he asked her to court, which I have to admit is pretty sweet. I hope they do turn out to be a good match.

That is interesting that both you and sunshine had this same thought. I was thinking surely they had some special friendship time before. But this was Kelly's response to a question on her blog when she announced the courtship:

Kelly January 12, 2014 at 12:18 am

Dear Heidi,

She found out at Thanksgiving when we told her he had called to ask about pursuing a relationship. She did not have any idea he liked her before that phone call, even though she had noticed him for quite some time. She also did not know he was going to ask her to court when she went to Michigan. Love, Kelly

Can't believe Brandon is already saying I love you to Michael when they haven't even spent much one on one time together.

[Dandruff]

I'm happy for Michael and wish her and Brandon the best. I find it hard to believe she had no idea he was going to ask her to court considering (1) she knew he had spoken to her parents and they presumably gave him the OK to pursue a relationship, and (2) she was going to visit his family in Michigan, which he (again, presumably) would have known about when he made the phone call. I'm guessing she's good enough friends with Becky and perhaps some of her sisters to travel to Michigan, and that Becky helped 'broker' the match. I suspect they were both sharing their feelings with Becky - with or without her encouragement - and there's that picture at the restaurant with Becky in front holding out her hands as if to say 'ta da!'. That's how I see it anyway.

[singsingsing]

I also find it really hard to believe that Michael knew that Brandon wanted to court her, but didn't realize he'd be asking her when she went to Michigan. But I guess maybe she assumed they'd have a lengthy 'getting to know ya' period like her siblings? From the sound of it, though, they had already gotten to know one another over the years. According to Kelly they used to babysit together during events/conferences, so it sounds like they've already spent a fair amount of time together.

[guidedbybobafett]

I always feel sad at the idea that these girls (and boys) court and often marry the first person they have a normal crush on. If I had married the first boy I had a real crush on at 16 it would have probably meant real devastation for me, though I know these kids have a different upbringing than I did. Im really glad I got a chance to meet and date that first crush without a definite possibility of us getting married in order for me to move on and meet the man im with today. It allowed me to understand what I want from a partner, and these kids dont have that. They are expected to work with what they get the first time they experience mutual attraction, and that seems really wrong. Yes, it may work occasionally, but it seems a flawed way to establish a marriage. My current partner and I have been together for 5 years, and our previous sexual partners dont take away from our commitment or happiness. I am sad that theres a world where prior experience means something dirty instead of something normal and healthy. Yes, I hope Michael is happy, but Im glad I dont have to deal with the insane bs her family puts on innocent attraction.

[Mela99]

I always feel sad at the idea that these girls (and boys) court and often marry the first person they have a normal crush on. If I had married the first boy I had a real crush on at 16 it would have probably meant real devastation for me, though I know these kids have a different upbringing than I did. Im really glad I got a chance to meet and date that first crush without a definite possibility of us getting married in order for me to move on and meet the man im with today. It allowed me to understand what I want from a partner, and these kids dont have that. They are expected to work with what they get the first time they experience mutual attraction, and that seems really wrong. Yes, it may work occasionally, but it seems a flawed way to establish a marriage. My current partner and I have been together for 5 years, and our previous sexual partners dont take away from our commitment or happiness. I am sad that theres a world where prior experience means something dirty instead of something normal and healthy. Yes, I hope Michael is happy, but Im glad I dont have to deal with the insane bs her family puts on innocent attraction.

This. I keep trying to tell my sister in law (she's 19) not to go so full on crazy with her BF. First boyfriend, first relationship, promise ring came out 6 months in. I don't want to see her hurt.

[Chickenetti]

I once had a roommate named Michaela. She went by Mikie. I thought it was super cute, and it fit her perfectly. Mikie would be perfect for a girl/woman named Michael.

I realize this is an old thread, but I was just reading through it and then just happened to read this on Kelly's blog:

Kelly January 11, 2014 at 11:46 pm

Dear Nicole,

Her legal name is Michael Christan. In letters, as she got older, I started switching to Michaella in writing just so her gender wouldn’t be confused. She prefers Michael now, though. Although her siblings rarely use her full name. She usually is referred to as “Mickey†or “Mikey.†Love, Kelly

[3 ring circus]

But then she'd have to invite Jesus too, that water won't turn itself into wine. And from my experience he's been pretty hard to get an RSVP back from. ;)

But Pa Keller said it was turned into grape juice and he knows all. :lol: :cray-cray:

[Mela99]

But Pa Keller said it was turned into grape juice and he knows all. :lol: :cray-cray:

Welp, I'm an ebil Catholic, so Jesus would never come to my wedding. I guess I failed. ::shame::

[Dandruff]

I realize this is an old thread, but I was just reading through it and then just happened to read this on Kelly's blog:

Kelly January 11, 2014 at 11:46 pm

Dear Nicole,

Her legal name is Michael Christan. In letters, as she got older, I started switching to Michaella in writing just so her gender wouldn’t be confused. She prefers Michael now, though. Although her siblings rarely use her full name. She usually is referred to as “Mickey†or “Mikey.†Love, Kelly

I guess she could change her name to whatever she wants once she gets married (since she'll be changing her last name anyway).

[notachance]

Re: marriage name change. Depends on the state. I wasn't able to change my middle name to my maiden name without filling a petition and getting Court approval, but I had friends in other states that did it by simply checking a box on their license application. I would imagine it would be very difficult for Michaela to change her first name at that time but I won't pretend to know Tennessee law