A modest proposal re: apparel and lust

[raineymott]

I have larger than normal breast (H cup. Yes, H. I had a gynocologist say "I didn't know cup sizes got that big. And I've had good luck with cacique''s stretch lace bra.) It hurts my back to go without a bra.

However, I second the getting over yourself if you are around naked people for a bit. There is a women's bathhouse in SF that I used to go to. No clothing. and you got over it. The one breasted lady was there, the one with the piericings, saggy...They all just became parts of the body.

My husband's ex gf wears an I cup...

[PennySycamore]

I'd do it, too, and I'm not a perky twentysomething. I'm 56 and have had 5 babies, all of whom breastfed and all but my premie for more than a year.

A pretty good argument can be made that ultimately more mothers would breastfeed if nursing moms abandoned attempts to breastfeed discretely. No more hooter hiders. No more blankets thrown over mom's shoulder. Don't act like there's anything shameful about breastfeeding because there isn't. Open your blouse from the top, latch that baby on, and nurse proudly!

[Deleted02]

I like it! However I don't know how my girls would do without the support.

[moreorlessnu]

I saw something at a public pool recently that bugged me. A little girl was wearing a two-piece outfit. She was having a fun time, jumping in and doing cannonballs, etc. Naturally, her top got pulled awry--not that much, just a little crooked. Her mom kept calling out, every time she surfaced, "FIx your top, honey! I can see your mosquito bite!" It took me awhile to realize what she was talking about. Yup, she was worried the child's nipple would show. Way to make sure your little girl becomes self-conscious and stops having fun ASAP! Cuz, you know, it's so much more important that she wear a cute outfit and then worry about it, than to have clothes that let her forget what she's wearing and enjoy life.

If the mother is going to be that squirrelly, she should have bought the child a 1 piece, or a 2 piece with a tankini top. Sheesh!

Oh, and the only reason why people noticed the "mosquito bite" was because the mother kept announcing it to all at the pool. Double sheesh!

[Grace]

The little European girls in my neighborhood when I lived overseas just wore little speedo bottoms. Like the little girl on the coppertone bottle. It was the cutest thing ever :)

[Daenerys]

None of these fundys seem to understand the idea that what constitutes 'revealing' clothing is a relative concept.

For example, my own country is fairly cold, so it's rare for me to expose more than my knees and elbows. Few people wear miniskirts, hotpants or belly tops often as the weather is prohibitive. If I was to walk round campus in a boob tube and short skirt, I would feel really slutty as everyone would be looking at me, but I have no problem wearing a swimming costume.

I have also lived in a country where 100F isn't even a remarkable temperature. When I was there, I was in shorts that barely covered my bottom, tiny vest pants and rarely even carried a cardigan around. The difference from home being, so was pretty much everybody else. You didn't feel exposed, or weird, because it was normalised by the environment. I was even happy to go topless on the beach.

By making it remarkable for a woman to show more than her calf and forearm on ANY occasion, the fundys sexualise women's bodies to an unnatural extent and actually make their people MORE sexual. I mean, the guys must get turned on by shoulders and knees!

[keen23]

I took my daughters to the beach over the summer, and my youngest really didn't like how the strap of her top was rubbing against her neck, so we took it off. She was quite happy running around topless for a few hours. She's 4 years old. The beach was crowded, and not a single person mentioned it or made a snide remark about it.

My own breasts are deflated from nursing 3 kids in 4 years, and my nipples currently reside in my armpits if I go without a bra...

[desertvixen]

Sign me up! I hate the whole idea that nursing needs to be hidden. Which would you rather see, the happy quiet baby getting their breastfeeding noms, or the upset crying baby who wants to eeeeeat?

[NurseNell]

Sign me up! I hate the whole idea that nursing needs to be hidden. Which would you rather see, the happy quiet baby getting their breastfeeding noms, or the upset crying baby who wants to eeeeeat?

We live in a society where NFL cheerleaders and Hooters' waitresses are adored for showing their breasts, often fake ones at that, but a nursing mother is shamed. Something is wrong with this picture.

And when a woman needs mastectomies for breast cancer she often feels pressure from family and friends to have a reconstruction done even though it is far more major surgery, the results are often disappointing, and there are significant complications. Many people thought I was crazy to not want new, fake breasts.

Nell

[Deleted02]

We live in a society where NFL cheerleaders and Hooters' waitresses are adored for showing their breasts, often fake ones at that, but a nursing mother is shamed. Something is wrong with this picture.

And when a woman needs mastectomies for breast cancer she often feels pressure from family and friends to have a reconstruction done even though it is far more major surgery, the results are often disappointing, and there are significant complications. Many people thought I was crazy to not want new, fake breasts.

Nell

You are so right. In my communications class we discussed different cultures and my instructor mentioned that many women in Africa breastfeed in public and it's no big deal. The girls in my class that had issues with it were saying how nasty it is to have your boobs exposed were all wearing low-cut shirts. I love irony.

[Love]

I think anyone who wants to do this should join me at the Oregon Country Fair next summer. :D For those who don't know, its not a state / county fair. Its a private fair, on private property outside of Eugene, Oregon. Its like a Renaissance Fair meets a hippy festival and many, many people are topless, and some are even nude. Lots of women paint their breasts or pregnant bellies with flowers and swirlies.

There are your young, cute, perky topless girls. But mostly its real women, real boobs bobbin' through the crowd.

We go every year with my 2 sons. This year, my 12 year old looked over at me one evening and said "34".

His dad and I asked him what on earth he was talking about.

His reply? "that's how many topless women i've seen today".

To which his little brother said "well, that makes a total of 68 boobies! because 34 x 2 = 68!" LOL

(edited to add that I spent the entire day with my kids and never once noticed the 12 yo gawking at anybody. He wasn't being perverted about it, just stating a fact. In years past he never counted. I think its a sign the hormones may be flowing?")

I am not one to go topless, as its not comfortable for me. But I do feel like i'm doing my kids a favor by desensitizing them to what real women look like. They won't expect magazine perfect women when they get old enough for enjoying the female body. We talk extensively about the differences between the images they see all over and real people.

[desertvixen]

We live in a society where NFL cheerleaders and Hooters' waitresses are adored for showing their breasts, often fake ones at that, but a nursing mother is shamed.

I personally attribute it to the "toy train" syndrome - you buy trains for the kid, but they're really for Daddy to play with... Never mind that nursing is what they're designed for.

I have pictures of the MiniVixen nursing, and to me they are some of my favorite pictures from her babyhood, because they showcase such an intimate and ultimately fleeting time for her and I to share. The fact that people feel those pictures are inappropriate for public display makes me sad.

[NurseNell]

they showcase such an intimate and ultimately fleeting time for her and I to share. The fact that people feel those pictures are inappropriate for public display makes me sad.

I have seen a Madonna portrait where Mary is nursing Jesus, and her breast is definitely showing. Not sure which old master did it, have to see if I can find it with google.

Nell

[NurseNell]

http://www.examiner.com/attachment-pare ... ding-jesus

Very interesting. The Vatican wants to see more art depicting Mary nursing Jesus. In the fundies' world the Catholic Church is the whore of Babylon so I'm sure they don't like this idea.

I go to a Spanish speaking Catholic Church and Moms nurse babies during Mass all the time, no one thinks anything of it. It's just how babies eat.

Nell

[Avalondaughter]

I love it! I'm not sure the girls would appreciate a whole week with no support, though.

Agreed. It would be rather painful for me!

[doe]

We live in a society where NFL cheerleaders and Hooters' waitresses are adored for showing their breasts, often fake ones at that, but a nursing mother is shamed. Something is wrong with this picture.

And when a woman needs mastectomies for breast cancer she often feels pressure from family and friends to have a reconstruction done even though it is far more major surgery, the results are often disappointing, and there are significant complications. Many people thought I was crazy to not want new, fake breasts.

Nell

Nell, I think that's awesome of you to make a personal choice for yourself and not be swayed by society and friends/family. Breast cancer runs in my family and years ago I decided if I ever had to deal with it I would go for a double mastectomy with no reconstruction. My granny only had one breast removed and the cancer quickly spread to the other and into her lymph nodes, and she died shortly after.

I for the most part American society can't handle breasts NOT being sexual. When I visited Europe many years ago I saw nudity in a couple commercials and thought the casual attitude was awesome. I love nudity in all its forms. To me it's just so natural and makes so much sense. I'd love to do something like take a stroll through the woods with nothing but a pair of sandals on.

[raineymott]

I think it's great that in Europe and stuff, nudity is normal...I'm just not used to it yet or comfortable around it. Yet. Some things take a little longer to get adjusted to lol

[Trynn]

I am all for going topless. I'm so small I don't need a bra anyway hehe.

Not sure I'd be comfortable with full nudity.

I do agree though that we need to get over the whole "women breastfeeding in public uncovered, oh noes!!!1!!1111!!eleventy." I mean, if super modest Muslims can do it, we should be able to as well.

[MamaJunebug]

I took my daughters to the beach over the summer, and my youngest really didn't like how the strap of her top was rubbing against her neck, so we took it off. She was quite happy running around topless for a few hours. She's 4 years old. The beach was crowded, and not a single person mentioned it or made a snide remark about it.

My own breasts are deflated from nursing 3 kids in 4 years, and my nipples currently reside in my armpits if I go without a bra...

My original point, Preciselyl

The primary purpose of breasts is to deliver milk to the young.

The more we're reminded of that fact, the less obsessed with them.

Well-used things show wear'n'tear! Toplessness for all!! If I have to look at my neighbor's manboobs & nipples on grass- cutting day, I should have the same option of undress in public!!

Areola Power!!!!! :D

Srsly -- forgive me my over-the-gophers just now! I'm just so delighted to see how this discussion is progressing, I feel happy/silly ! It will pass, I promise. ;)

[moreorlessnu]

Areola Power!!!!! :D

I'm imagining what your superhero costume would look like, and I can't help giggling because I *know* where the cutouts would be...

[ems]

I'll do it, though my set might be rather sore when it's all said and done.

I've never understood why this country gets so damn uptight about nudity. I had a fundie-lite girl describe nudity as being pornograpic: no, nudity does not equal sexuality. They are two very different things. And maybe if we weren't so prudish about it, we wouldn't have such unnecessary uproars on otherwise trivial things.

Ever read Kelly Crawford's comments on nude artwork? Apparently she basically thinks that nude art=porn. I guess that means Michaelangelo's David too...

[ADoyle90815]

Ever read Kelly Crawford's comments on nude artwork? Apparently she basically thinks that nude art=porn. I guess that means Michaelangelo's David too...

Many fundies consider nude art=porn, and if fundies had their way, you would see at least fig leaves or loincloths on nude art. Private universities owned by churches often censor art displays, as there was an incident years ago when BYU refused to allow Rodin's The Kiss on campus.