Sparkling Adventures Blog

[Vex]

I'm a bit late, but of course we have dress codes here in Australia. But it wouldn't be very sparkly if Lauren gave in to the 'PC police' and their unreasonable restrictions regarding what her speshul snowflakes can or cannot wear.

A lot of restaurants and shopping centres specifically say no bare feet, but people tend to be more forgiving of a kid with no shoes on than they would be with an adult.

[chaotic life]

Laurne has bragged about violating airline dress code and forcing unhappy airline staff to allow her sparkly little family to travel barefoot despite knowing the rules for the airlines she hops to and from New Zealand requires shoes to fly.

She also HEAVILY edits the blog if she detects there is too much disapproval for what she has written. Her blog cannot be considered achivally accurate. She is the most heavy editing blogger I have ever seen.

I have a small time blog. I refuse to edit it. I don't even correct typos if I didn't correct them when I first published something. However, I see it more as format for journaling that doesn't allow my children to destroy my journal by messing with my stuff. Lauren uses her blog to present a very specific persona, and that persona changes over time. She's not above completely re-writing history. For all of her cries that she blogs so her children will have an "accurate" account of their childhood, it's malarkey. She blogs so the world will pat her on the back because she can write well but she cannot parent nearly so well and she must get her validation *somewhere*.

[August]

I remember the post on flying without shoes! Lauren was so dismissive of them requiring shoes, sneering that there's no reason to need them on a plane.,When, of course, it's not ON the plane you need them. It's when the plane crashes on takeoff and you're trying to get through shattered glass and ripped metal and fragments of plastic and burning aviation fuel to get off the plane and away before it explodes that they don't want you to hold up the person behind you because your foot just got skewered by a piece of metal.

[Vex]

But plane crashes don't happen to sparkly people, August. Duh.

[chaotic life]

I dunno, it was on a plane *I* most needed them. Insantely long flight from New Dehli to Amsterdam when I discovered that some men really have NO qualms about having NO aim for a toilet and will simply leave an airplane floor sticky with urine. Had the flight been shorter I would have simply held it, but in an overnight flight I would have floated away. Every bathroom on that flight became sticky and stinky with piss. It was a STRONG committment that even mostly barefoot, Southern me an airplane is one place I WOULD wear shoes more than anywhere else.

[SouthCarolinaGirl79]

MrsKay, I agree with you about babies and shoes. My son never had shoes until he was ready to walk. I think it is silly to buy shoes for infants. Barefoot is best for a developing foot. I think my son started walking around 10 months, so that is when we bought shoes. Even when I put him in shoes to walk in public, I would take them off in the car. Up until that point, every time we left the house he was in a footed sleeper or socks. I'm a southern girl obviously and I said we go barefooted in the house and outside when the weather is nice on the grass, but I draw the line at walking around in public without shoes.

[Lychee]

Have we discussed the christmas post? I think it may have got a bit lost in the drama. I can't believe how confusing it must all be for those children to not be able to see their father and then just get presents like this with a seeming total lack of context.

I apreciate that she is trying to keep a relationship there for the girls but she has gone miles away from him so they can never visit. it just seems rather messed up.

[August]

But plane crashes don't happen to sparkly people, August. Duh.

That's my downtrodden, doom-laden modern drone outlook for you. Why, I bet I just bring all those crashes on myself by planning for them!

[BravaAmica]

I'm famous in our circle of family and friends for being a bit rabid about my babies and toddlers not wearing shoes. My daughter's first pair of shoes (stiff/thick-soled shoes, she already had a ton of slipper style shoes) was a huge rite of passage when she was almost 2. She was a late walker, as all of my kids have been, and started really walking during the winter; I let my mom pick out the shoes as soon as the weather made it possible for GirlKay to walk outside. She did wear thick slippers with grips on the bottom, if we went out; I was able to find some that looked like old-fashioned booties that went with her outfits. MIL bought BoyKay a pair of stiff, hard-soled (they weren't rubber, they were some hard material that had zero flexibility, that I hadn't seen on kids' shoes in a LONG time) when he wasn't even a year old; I put them up and "forgot" where they were, until he outgrew them. My MIL always deliberately went against my wishes, or else I would have been more cautious of her feelings. Anyway, I digress. My kids had loads of barefoot time to learn to really walk and run, and always had foot protection. I understand not wanting to stick shoes on your kids all the time, but it's a parent's responsibility to provide them at least as protective gear to fall back on. I grew up quite shoeless, and had no issues, but I was mostly a country kid who stayed in the yard. I've had 3 kids, all of whom I've dragged through stores during the early years. The things that THEY left behind at times were not what I would want anyone to step in (when a janitor mops up puke, s/he rarely seems to actually sanitize the area). Now, we live in an area where BoyKay almost stepped on a needle last summer, after slyly removing his shoes and socks. With ToddlerKay learning to walk, I hated to put shoes on him, but you have to adapt to your surroundings. Suck it up, and fucking protect your kids, and other people who come along after your kids.

Re: shoes. DS had a pair of baby Adidas sneakers that my sisters gave him. They went with the Adidas track suit and onesie. They were size 0 or 1, so he was still a babe in arms when he wore them (and then only for like 45 minutes because of diaper changes- have to take the shoes off, then the track suit bottoms, yadda yadda yadda). I must say, he looked so cute in the track suit and little shoes. They also only fit him until he was about six weeks old, lol. My mom would also buy matching shoes whenever she bought him an outfit- like baby Teva sandals to go with the swim trunks and rash shirt (you know, for all that swimming my son did when he was 4mos old, lol)*, baby Converse hi-tops (to go with the black leather jacket, Ramones t-shirt, and jeans)- so I'd put them on him with the outfit, she'd coo over him, her friends would coo over him, Mom would take some pictures and the shoes would come off at the next diaper change.

When he started crawling/furniture surfing, I put him in these. They were cute as fuck, machine washable, kept his socks on and gave him a bit of traction. When he was toddling around the park, he'd wear closed-toe sandals (like Keenes, but the knock offs from Payless).

/end shoe hijack

*: My mom and I are not in the same tax bracket, lol.

[smokeonthewater]

As the Golgafrinchams well know, good telephone hygiene is of the utmost importance.

Genius! I think of them every time I use a rather grubby phone...

[J'ean Skirt]

For me the issue with shoes is hookworms. I don't know how prevalent they are in NZ and AU, but if her kids are in wet areas, then it's possible they're infected. Given how underfed they are, if they're infected they're likely to develop anemia.

Poor babies.

[heidi]

I just finished the 100 page thread and now this one. I'm baffled as to how she can keep doing what's she's doing. Her decisions are putting her daughters into unsafe situations. How can she possibly keep getting away with it?

Did anyone notice that Aisha wasn't mentioned much nor pictured much in the most recent blog post? That poor little dear.

[amydamy]

Have we discussed the christmas post? I think it may have got a bit lost in the drama. I can't believe how confusing it must all be for those children to not be able to see their father and then just get presents like this with a seeming total lack of context.

I apreciate that she is trying to keep a relationship there for the girls but she has gone miles away from him so they can never visit. it just seems rather messed up.

I wonder who the people randomly sending her gifts are and how they knew where to send them. Does she have a plan of where she is going it seems to me it kind of just random meandering.

[amydamy]

13 · Kate · 14 January 2013, 20:17

Funny you are posting this now. The past four days I’ve been thinking of you so much, perhaps reading about your sense of ‘running’ so far from home and Elijah. I worry about you, so far from any support people, four (beautiful) girls so totally reliant on you, and nowhere to ‘rest’. It’s been such a massive year for you (all), and being on the move you haven’t even been able to connect with a counsellor (I assume)… If there’s nowhere you want to stop and put roots down, for a while, maybe there’s one online?

I don’t know you, except through your (brave and beautiful) blogs, but I care about you. I hope that you can find somewhere with friends that you can chill for a while, maybe the girls could also have some time to make friends, homeschool group or some such… I don’t know… (Of course I don’t)… I just want to urge you to take a break, listen to your body… Rest. In some place that is ‘safe’… Let yourself grieve and let go of everything for a while… Have someone else mind the girls for the bulk of the time so you can process what’s happened and what’s happening now.

Please let this blow into the wind if it doesn’t resonate, and take no offence. I’m just wishing some release and relief for you xxx

14 · Lauren Fisher · 14 January 2013, 20:24

Kate,

Thank you for your concern.

While in Tasmania, we have been surrounded with friends — old and new. Each week we spend several days in the company of those who know us and our story and occasionally we connect with new families who know nothing of our loss. My support people are spread out across the world, and so we travel from one open set of arms to another. It’s a lovely way to heal.

Love,

Lauren.

I'm surprised this person doesn't know it's not OK to try and tell Lauren what to do or criticize her in anyway.

[Lychee]

That was one of us right?

Well done for putting some great advice in Lauren friendly language. Shame she only listens to herself.

[happy atheist]

It would be nice to think it was one of us, but it would also be nice if it was unrelated to us, because that would mean that we aren't the only ones with concerns. If that's the case, then sooner or later she's going to run out of uncritical "friends."

[heidi]

It would be nice to think it was one of us, but it would also be nice if it was unrelated to us, because that would mean that we aren't the only ones with concerns. If that's the case, then sooner or later she's going to run out of uncritical "friends."

I have to admit that I don't understand the mindset of her supporters. How can they look at something like the children swimming in dangerous locations and thing that it's ~wonderful? I'm boggled that so many people lauded her for allowing her daughters to circumvent a pool gate!

[happy atheist]

I have to admit that I don't understand the mindset of her supporters. How can they look at something like the children swimming in dangerous locations and thing that it's ~wonderful? I'm boggled that so many people lauded her for allowing her daughters to circumvent a pool gate!

I don't get it either. Maybe it's because they wish they could be that "free." Or it could just be the same stupid mindset that says that anything outside the norm is better. Sort of a hipster take on the world.

[Guest Anonymous]

I have to admit that I don't understand the mindset of her supporters. How can they look at something like the children swimming in dangerous locations and thing that it's ~wonderful? I'm boggled that so many people lauded her for allowing her daughters to circumvent a pool gate!

she got a lot of 'constructive criticism' over the pool gate too, here and on facebook. she has become adept at editing and deleting and banning anyone who dares to care for her children. the pool gate incident took place in the home of her sister and bil, who she has previously named and described as local family doctors. I bet they were furious and torn between protecting their reputations and staying it touch for the children's sake.

[Aisling]

I have to admit that I don't understand the mindset of her supporters. How can they look at something like the children swimming in dangerous locations and thing that it's ~wonderful? I'm boggled that so many people lauded her for allowing her daughters to circumvent a pool gate!

Exactly. A family in my area recently lost their young child to drowning. It happened in a split second: they were in a neighbour's garden, there was a small pond, you can imagine the rest.

Do Lauren's fan girls believe that her children are so sparkly that they will be borne upon the waves like mermaid foam? Water is so, so dangerous. Kids can drown in a lot less than a pool. Yet Lauren jokes about how fun it is to ignore basic measure put in place to ensure, not only the safety of her children, but of other people's.

Coupled with the fact that Lauren has already lost a child in this way- it's just unbelievable. Part of the reason I keep coming on to this thread and banging my head off the imaginary wall, is because I genuinely cannot get my head around the fact that this family's need for help is clearly documented on their own blog, and yet people still think there's nothing wrong.

[CheeseDeprived]

I have to admit that I don't understand the mindset of her supporters. How can they look at something like the children swimming in dangerous locations and thing that it's ~wonderful? I'm boggled that so many people lauded her for allowing her daughters to circumvent a pool gate!

I think it's quite easy to get sucked in by her sparkliness and her little twittery pearls of wisdom and look at her as some sort of enlightened earth mother who knows exactly what she's doing... I used to think she was pretty special before I came across this forum a few months ago. Mind you, that was before all those very dangerous things took place - I think I would have changed my opinion of her either way. But I think some people must be so dazzled by the sparkle that they've practically gone blind.

Did anyone notice that Aisha wasn't mentioned much nor pictured much in the most recent blog post? That poor little dear.

Yeah, I've noticed she's generally not in many pictures. Maybe she's old enough to feel self-conscious about being on show all the time and avoids the camera.

[adidas]

For me the issue with shoes is hookworms. I don't know how prevalent they are in NZ and AU, but if her kids are in wet areas, then it's possible they're infected. Given how underfed they are, if they're infected they're likely to develop anemia.

Poor babies.

They're definitely around. Personally I'm much more concerned about broken glass and biohazards.

Lauren is looking so thin. It's obvious that she's not taking care of herself and that she really is running away. It's going to catch up with her though, and I'm afraid of what could happen when it does.

[wild little fox]

Exactly. And animal feces isn't all. Those people go everywhere and those poor girls could step on glass on any matter of garbage people throw on the ground. Not to mention when she takes them to the bathroom. The thought of those kids standing barefoot on a public restroom floor is about enough to make me gag.

I've got a high tolerance for walking barefoot (I grew up and live on a farm) but the thought of using a public restroom unshod??? BLECH!!!!!

[wild little fox]

I worry about these children so much. Not just about their physical safety and well being, but also for their emotional health. The fact that they have not been allowed to mourn and Lauren's living in deep denial la-la land disturbs me greatly. This, along with the severe neglect is setting these poor girls up for so many disorders. I doubt they will be able to function as adults. Repeatedly exposing them to water and Laren's semmingly revisiting the death scene in various forms repeatedly. I'm afraid that with all this neglect, trauma and repeated trauma these babies are going to be very messed up.

[samithemage]

Excellent. She is definitely still letting them play with scissors unsupervised.

Dell’s favourite toy at the moment are a small pair of scissors. I usually have some with me — even when we’re out and about — and they’re a great distraction for Dell when she finds she can’t join in with her older sisters’ games.

Those poor girls. Callista's hair is still a mangled mess. Heaven forbid she squash Callista's sparklieness by not letting her hack off her own hair and Del's hair. You know if Callista came towards Lauren's precious dreds with those scissors that it would be a different story.