How Pride, Virginity and Abstinence Messed Up My Sex Drive

[ceg045]

In her closing sentence, she warns young people not to let "abstinence become an idol in your life." Looking at you, Steve Maxwell. Looking at you. :shifty:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/the-good- ... f=religion

[gustava]

And the difference between virginity and abstinence is.......

[emmiedahl]

And the difference between virginity and abstinence is.......

They are two different movements, although technically the same thing in most cases. The virginity movement focuses on purity while the abstinence movement focuses on prevention of disease and unwanted pregnancy. Just my opinion, there seems to be a slight difference in the purpose.

[Kitty]

They are two different movements, although technically the same thing in most cases. The virginity movement focuses on purity while the abstinence movement focuses on prevention of disease and unwanted pregnancy. Just my opinion, there seems to be a slight difference in the purpose.

In my experience of abstinence-only classes, the abstinence movement also aims to be more secular, without mentioning God or religion. I really don't think the abstinence movement is that much better, since it still uses the emotional arguments the purity/virginity movement does. Also, the abstinence movement doesn't hype up those silly rings or dances, and doesn't require the input of the parents father so much. Anything with "abstinence" attached to it that I've seen is aiming for a much broader audience than anything with "purity" tacked on. JMO.

I'd really like if they just abandoned the concept of purity altogether. Sex is not dirty and should not be seen that way. And what is really troublesome about both movements is, they assume that just anyone will find birth control information when they're older and ready to marry. Well, yeah, Googling "birth control" is easy, but the movements dog on condoms and the Pill so much that it seems like they're the only means of birth control (other than pulling out), and this sort of ensures that people won't even think to Google "forms of birth control," because they think they'll already know all about it by what they've heard from their friends/family/school.

[bananacat]

They are two different movements, although technically the same thing in most cases. The virginity movement focuses on purity while the abstinence movement focuses on prevention of disease and unwanted pregnancy. Just my opinion, there seems to be a slight difference in the purpose.

I don't believe that the abstinence movement actually focuses on preventing disease and pregnancy. Instead it focuses on trying to scare people about pregnancy and disease without actually providing them the knowledge and tools to protect themselves. And they try to be secular, but only to have an easier time getting into schools. Instead of "don't be a slut or God will kill you and you'll deserve it", it's "don't be a slut or AIDS will kill you and you'll deserve it." Remember, Bristol Palin is a product of the abstinence movement.

[wtfrenchtoast]

Way to tell us what we already know. That drilling "NO SEX" into your head for years and years, then trying to undo that in one night, is ridiculously difficult. Why not embrace a healthy view of sexuality where you don't have some arbitrary limit and instead become sexually active when you are ready?

[emmiedahl]

I don't believe that the abstinence movement actually focuses on preventing disease and pregnancy. Instead it focuses on trying to scare people about pregnancy and disease without actually providing them the knowledge and tools to protect themselves. And they try to be secular, but only to have an easier time getting into schools. Instead of "don't be a slut or God will kill you and you'll deserve it", it's "don't be a slut or AIDS will kill you and you'll deserve it." Remember, Bristol Palin is a product of the abstinence movement.

I totally agree, but the stated purpose is to prevent through abstinence. Its effectiveness is another story.

I personally am a fan of keeping a stock of condoms and a package of morning after pills under the bathroom sink.

[tropaka]

Could a been worse for the author...watched a TLC "Strange Sex" epi awhile back where the poor girl was so scared of actually having sex that she found the act painful and had to get therapy

[Anise]

Could a been worse for the author...watched a TLC "Strange Sex" epi awhile back where the poor girl was so scared of actually having sex that she found the act painful and had to get therapy

Actually, a fundamentalist upbringing is a known major cause of vaginismus and is listed as such on medical sites.

And yet, people keep preaching this stuff.

I wish I could trade for a healthy sexuality. Reading stuff by Ursula Le Guin makes me feel so wistful. Oh for guiltless, beautiful pleasure.

[luckystone]

That's a really interesting article.