Fundy Double-Entendre Moments

[tinuviel]

We all know that Dougie is like the Fundamentalist Tobias Fuenke. [un]fortunately, he's not the only one. What unintentionally sexual Fundy gold have you guys found?

I'll start with my two favorites:

Mom has an inspirational daily calendar. One page suggested that the reader pray for Jesus to "reach down and touch you with his omnipotent finger of love."

Bro's GF worked at a Christian camp that promised potential counselors that they would be "stretched and drained, yet wonderfully filled by Jesus."

...Apparently Jesus has serious game. :dance:

[GeoBQn]

Three immortal words from Smuggar: "Master of swallowing"

[mypsychoticself]

"Get on your knees to love Jesus."

[mpheels]

Not a double entendre, but I'm always amused when we see the Duggar girls cluelessly felating pickles.

[teachmehowtoduggar]

Not a double entendre, but I'm always amused when we see the Duggar girls cluelessly felating pickles.

:lol:

[Kitty]

"Sweet fellowship."

Even when they use it innocuously (talking about meeting friends) I always think it's referring to sex, thanks to Kelly and Gil Bates. D:

Just about anything else about being filled, on one's knees, being "touched" by the lord... yeah, it's WAY too easy.

[Rachel333]

Not really fundie, but the Mormon hymn "Come, Come Ye Saints" always made me giggle (as did the "hold fast to the iron rod" stuff).

[bananacat]

"Omnipotent finger of love" should be a name for a giant dildo, if it isn't already. I'd buy one.

[Witsec7]

"Omnipotent finger of love" should be a name for a giant dildo, if it isn't already. I'd buy one.

I googled and there isn't one. If I had found one I would have bought it and had it shipped to Sara Maxwell.

[Little Miss Alien]

I think the whole Ray Comfort banana video just takes the prize.

[Mela99]

Three immortal words from Smuggar: "Master of swallowing"

How did I miss that gem? What was he talking about?

[ladypuglover]

How did I miss that gem? What was he talking about?

About Anna taking her prenatal vitamins.

[Daenerys]

I once had to sing a hymn at school that began 'the finger of the spirit is moving in me and the next verse was the bush of the spirit is coming to me. Needless to say none of the students could keep a straight face... :lol:

[ophelia]

About Anna taking her prenatal vitamins.

oh boy, I just wet my pants. :clap: :dance:

[1004srs]

Yeah - anytime the Duggar girls pull out the pickles. Why oh why doesn't someone tell Michelle to have a talk with them about that.

[pixydust]

I once had to sing a hymn at school that began 'the finger of the spirit is moving in me and the next verse was the bush of the spirit is coming to me. Needless to say none of the students could keep a straight face... :lol:

Wait, WHAT?!? Why is the Spirit a finger and a bush? :shock:

[MonkeyMomma]

I think the whole Ray Comfort banana video just takes the prize.

It just fits so nicely in the hand ... and curves toward the mouth.

God is good.

[JaChelle Sugar]

Dougie and the manly, sweaty romp

[FireIsCatching89]

"Daddy on His Knees" by the Maxwells. That just sounds like a gay porno title. Hell, it probably already is.

[kb2]

My favorite was the Kirk Cameron and Ray Comfort banana video.

[freealljs]

My favorite was the Kirk Cameron and Ray Comfort banana video.

LOL. Odd sexual undertones. it makes me think Ray Comfort needs some "comforting".

As for the pickle issue with the Duggar girls, if Michelle were to talk to them about how they handle pickles, that would mean Michelle would be doing actual parenting.

[donks]

LOL. Odd sexual undertones. it makes me think Ray Comfort needs some "comforting".

As for the pickle issue with the Duggar girls, if Michelle were to talk to them about how they handle pickles, that would mean Michelle would be doing actual parenting.

I doubt Michelle knows much about fellatio. I mean 19 kids living, at least 2 not living... She ain't the mistress of fellatio, she's the queen of missionary!

[nomi]

My favorite was the Kirk Cameron and Ray Comfort banana video.

I'm sorry but I have to disagree with his peeling method. When peel a banana using the god-given pop top you bruise the fruit. Instead, do as the monkeys do and squeeze the bottom of the banana and peel it from there. No bruises and super easy.

[Caxpax]

I want to know you (in the secret place) - by sonic flood.

The first time I went to church with my boyfriend (now husband), the praise band played this song and I started giggling so badly I had to leave the service. The song sounded SOOO dirty to me. Of course, I was super horny at the time because hubs was still wrestling with the whole "pre-marital sex is a sin" issue so I wasn't getting any. Whenever we're feeling punchy we'll start singing the song to one another and cracking up hysterically. His folks have heard us a few times and get very confused.

[moreorlessnu]

There's a religious song that has a line, "I am the resurrection, and the life". The way the timing of the song and emphasis on the syllables of the words go, it sounds like you are singing rez-ERECTION. We could never keep a straight face singing that one...

Example here:

But, we used to sing it with more emphasis on the erection.