Lori Alexander: 64: Continuing the Sardines into the Next Generation

[lilwriter85]

IWhen Ken was on FJ, he made some comment about paying a lot for Lori's health care. Lori liked Liam's comment about not having different forms of insurance, cutting their own hair, not taking vacations, and shopping at discount stores. If he's not trolling and is telling the truth about going without auto or medical insurance, then Lori is a fucking idiot to like that comment.  She would be supporting someone not following the law regarding car insurance. 

If Ken dies before Lori, she'll probably start hitting up her kids for money for her expensive organic food. I still think if Ken ended up in some medical crisis that fucked up their finances, Lori would probably refuse to downsize their lifestyle. 

ETA: I would laugh if news outlet or blog called out Lori for liking Liam's comments. 

[lilwriter85]

A couple of people are questioning Liam regarding not having insurance.  Got the screenshot in case Lori or a mod fangirl decides to protect him. It would be hilarious if  a cop or someone who works in insurance ripped him apart on FB. 

 

 

[Free Jana Duggar]

I know this is off topic, but I could really use your prayers. My 17 year old daughter has been very rebellious lately. She really is a good kid who has not given us much trouble. It's mainly her combative attitude where you can't tell her anything. She will start screaming and cursing if you look at her wrong. My husband makes it worse because he will yell back and the whole thing gets out of hand.

The other day she screamed at her dad that she hated him and ran out the door. He calls me at work in a panic to come home. We go look for her and she causes a scene in the street. We finally get her in the van AND SHE OPENS THE DOOR TO JUMP OUT WHILE IT'S MOVING!  We got her home and her younger (but bigger) brother had to help keep her from taking off again.

She is adopted and I believe has issues with that, but has been seeing a therapist.  I'm at a loss here. My husband doesn't have any patience with her disrespect, so he will battle with her.  

I'm afraid I could lose my job because my husband calls me to come home whenever she has an episode (which I've had to do twice recently). He works mostly from home so they get into it quite often since she is doing homeschool and they are together a lot.  I'm so stressed out to leave them home. It's affecting our son because he is home as well and has to listen to them scream while trying to do his school work.  Public school is not an option until fall due to credits.

Any teen parenting wisdom or prayers are greatly appreciated. I'm dying here.

[lilwriter85]

Liam posted that his family is QF and just had their 8th child.  I also saw some interesting discussion a couple of days back involving a fangirl whose husband makes less than $11 per hour and people questioned her regarding housing and other expenses. Lori stepped in and said others were antagonizing her. I don't think Lori understands that some people are wisely pointing that it would be difficult for many families to survive on that income. 

16 minutes ago, Free Jana Duggar said:

I know this is off topic, but I could really use your prayers. My 17 year old daughter has been very rebellious lately. She really is a good kid who has not given us much trouble. It's mainly her combative attitude where you can't tell her anything. She will start screaming and cursing if you look at her wrong. My husband makes it worse because he will yell back and the whole thing gets out of hand.

The other day she screamed at her dad that she hated him and ran out the door. He calls me at work in a panic to come home. We go look for her and she causes a scene in the street. We finally get her in the van AND SHE OPENS THE DOOR TO JUMP OUT WHILE IT'S MOVING!  We got her home and her younger (but bigger) brother had to help keep her from taking off again.

She is adopted and I believe has issues with that, but has been seeing a therapist.  I'm at a loss here. My husband doesn't have any patience with her disrespect, so he will battle with her.  

I'm afraid I could lose my job because my husband calls me to come home whenever she has an episode (which I've had to do twice recently). He works mostly from home so they get into it quite often since she is doing homeschool and they are together a lot.  I'm so stressed out to leave them home. It's affecting our son because he is home as well and has to listen to them scream while trying to do his school work.  Public school is not an option until fall due to credits.

Any teen parenting wisdom or prayers are greatly appreciated. I'm dying here.

I'm sorry about what your family is going through. Sending good thoughts your way and hope things gets better. 

[Lgirlrocks]

@Free Jana Duggar I’m not a mom but I was a teenager not to long ago. Have you tried asking her what’s going on? I know that seems obvious. I went through a lot as a teen. My dad getting sick, my mom being moody because she was working two jobs and having to take care of my dad. I acted out. All I wanted was to be asked how I was feeling and if I was okay. 

Maybe her therapist could offer you some advice as well. 

[Frog99]

27 minutes ago, Free Jana Duggar said:

I know this is off topic, but I could really use your prayers. My 17 year old daughter has been very rebellious lately. She really is a good kid who has not given us much trouble. It's mainly her combative attitude where you can't tell her anything. She will start screaming and cursing if you look at her wrong. My husband makes it worse because he will yell back and the whole thing gets out of hand.

The other day she screamed at her dad that she hated him and ran out the door. He calls me at work in a panic to come home. We go look for her and she causes a scene in the street. We finally get her in the van AND SHE OPENS THE DOOR TO JUMP OUT WHILE IT'S MOVING!  We got her home and her younger (but bigger) brother had to help keep her from taking off again.

She is adopted and I believe has issues with that, but has been seeing a therapist.  I'm at a loss here. My husband doesn't have any patience with her disrespect, so he will battle with her.  

I'm afraid I could lose my job because my husband calls me to come home whenever she has an episode (which I've had to do twice recently). He works mostly from home so they get into it quite often since she is doing homeschool and they are together a lot.  I'm so stressed out to leave them home. It's affecting our son because he is home as well and has to listen to them scream while trying to do his school work.  Public school is not an option until fall due to credits.

Any teen parenting wisdom or prayers are greatly appreciated. I'm dying here.

My oldest is 11, so no lived experience. I am sending prayers your way.

Jumping out of the vehicle in motion is very impulsive- it almost sounds like she was in a full on panic attack (my 11 year old has anxiety and has had moments where she feels the need to escape the situation right then and there- it happened at my sister’s over Thanksgiving- no new people, nothing other than people visiting and eating- she can’t up to me and said we had to leave right then and walked outside). I would also touch base with her therapist. 

And I know it’s easy to say- but your husband is going to have to control his reaction. It looks like disrespect to him but that doesn’t mean it is. Behavior has a function- identifying that is key. 

Dr. Dan Siegel is a great resource- he has several books and you can watch a YouTube of the hand brain model. 

[FullOfGravy]

3 hours ago, SilverBeach said:

Regarding Lori Alexander and her "God will provide" nonsense: If you quit a job or refuse to work despite your ability to do so, mother or father or whoever, and you suffer deprivation, God will tell you that he already provided.

Right?  Lori is setting herself up as the arbiter of how God is allowed to provide.  If a woman has the brains and drive to go to college and pursue a career, well, those aren't Lori-approved gifts, so God had better just take them back and send her a well-off husband instead.  If a family is struggling and mom finds a job opportunity, that's also not acceptable provision; God should've sent an inheritance.

I'm far from a Biblical scholar, but I don't remember God's provision ever coming with gift receipts and an exchange policy.  

[lilwriter85]

Liam just replied to the people questioning him regarding not having insurance. He says he has basic liability insurance and not full coverage. But, if he's telling the truth about not having medical insurance or not taking his kids to a dentist, then he's still stupid because shit can happen in life.

Quote

My house is paid off so I do not need house insurance by law. My car is paid off as well so I have basic state required liability not the full coverage, road side assistance and all the other fancy policies they try to sell. If your house and car are financed you must have full coverage insurance by law. Luckily my home is paid off as well as my car even though I must carry liability on my car.

ETA: There are things about Liam's profile pic and the cover photo that scream troll to me and the amount of Facebook friends is pointing at him being a troll.  Lori is a such fucking idiot lol for liking his troll comments. I wasn't sure if he was trolling or not because some fundie types have done some of the same things to cut corners when it comes to money. Years back, Zsu Anderson said her family didn't have health insurance because they ate organic food, I think one of the Pearls' adult kids didn't go to dentists, and there have been other fundies who don't have health insurance. 

If Liam continues trolling Lori and she keeps liking his comments then I will laugh up each time.

[livinglongerthanyou]

1 hour ago, Frog99 said:

 And I know it’s easy to say- but your husband is going to have to control his reaction. It looks like disrespect to him but that doesn’t mean it is. Behavior has a function- identifying that is key. 

So much this ^^^!! Just about the wisest thing I have read on the internet regarding parenting. 

Having worked with teens in a high school where my job was to deal with kids in crisis, I was told often where to go, how to get there and often given a map. I've been called everything under the sun - a couple of words I had to look up. I had to just let it all go and take nothing personally because these kids were ALWAYS responding to something that had nothing to do with me. 

It is important that you and your husband remain level headed and calm. You can deal with the screaming and disrespect later. There is something bigger going on for her.

How much access does she have to social media? The reason I ask is because I have seen kids do some really stupid things on their phones and on the internet and find themselves in a real jam. They have sent inappropriate photos of themselves to strangers or cultivated a relationship with a stranger, who then turns on them. This is just one thought.

What about her friends? Or other adults in her life? Something may have happened and she is too frightened or ashamed to speak of it.

I know this is pretty dark stuff but it's worth considering, no matter how hard it may be.

[feministxtian]

1 hour ago, Frog99 said:

And I know it’s easy to say- but your husband is going to have to control his reaction. It looks like disrespect to him but that doesn’t mean it is. Behavior has a function- identifying that is key. 

Like I told my husband when the kids were growing up...be the adult, don't let them push your buttons. The minute you (the adult) loses control, they've lost the battle. My husband would lose his marbles because I wouldn't attend every argument I was invited to by the kids. I'd walk away, ignore, speak calmly...drove him batshit. 

[ViolaSebastian]

I would definitely speak with the therapist about her behavior. Typically, seventeen is when things start to calm down a bit, so it sounds like something is going on in her life that’s causing these issues—especially if she’s been fairly easy-going until now. I will say that I had these kinds episodes where I lashed out as a teenager, and I now recognize that I was having anxiety and it was manifesting as anger and rage. 

I’m so sorry you’re going through this—it sounds so difficult. Im sending you all my good thoughts. ❤️?

[smittykins]

On 4/13/2019 at 9:24 PM, Seahorse Wrangler said:

I think it needs a longer scene of home-schooling in which a mature godly matron teaches young Caitlin about 10 minutes and lube while caressing a pipe of plumbing line. Raisans optional.

HEE!  And, EW! 

In retrospect, I should’ve included a passel of younger siblings for her to sister-mom(in order to prepare her for her future role as Godly helpmeet).

[freealljs]

Basic roadside assistance is a fancy policy to Liam? Yeesh, I'm glad that I'm not married to him.  Should I have God on speed dial when something happens to my car?

And so his house is paid off, so he doesn't need house insurance. I live in an area heavily affected by Hurricane Michael.  Tell that to my neighbors who lost their homes.  Some of them didn't have house insurance and lived to regret it.

 

[Free Jana Duggar]

9 hours ago, livinglongerthanyou said:

So much this ^^^!! Just about the wisest thing I have read on the internet regarding parenting. 

Having worked with teens in a high school where my job was to deal with kids in crisis, I was told often where to go, how to get there and often given a map. I've been called everything under the sun - a couple of words I had to look up. I had to just let it all go and take nothing personally because these kids were ALWAYS responding to something that had nothing to do with me. 

It is important that you and your husband remain level headed and calm. You can deal with the screaming and disrespect later. There is something bigger going on for her.

How much access does she have to social media? The reason I ask is because I have seen kids do some really stupid things on their phones and on the internet and find themselves in a real jam. They have sent inappropriate photos of themselves to strangers or cultivated a relationship with a stranger, who then turns on them. This is just one thought.

What about her friends? Or other adults in her life? Something may have happened and she is too frightened or ashamed to speak of it.

I know this is pretty dark stuff but it's worth considering, no matter how hard it may be.

Thank you. We have checked her phone and social media accounts and haven't found anything out of the ordinary. I know that doesn't necessarily mean anything as kids are good at deleting and having secret accounts etc.

I was thinking this most recent episode was possibly due to to our moving in January. We traveled several hours back to her old school for the prom at last weekend. I know she is missing her boyfriend. I'm pretty sure that has something to do with it, but she  had episodes before the move as well....

[SongRed7]

19 hours ago, lilwriter85 said:

et, I doubt Lori has ever set foot in a thrift shop or other places that sells clothes at cheap prices.  She's talked about having a $75 skirt and in some of her IG pics she's wearing Nike sneakers. 

and she regularly posts pictures of her expensive Jane Iredale makeup, supplements, ingredients, and black salve.  What one of those face powders costs (like $35-40) could buy a lot of groceries for some families.  She makes me so angry. 

 

[lilwriter85]

21 minutes ago, SongRed7 said:

and she regularly posts pictures of her expensive Jane Iredale makeup, supplements, ingredients, and black salve.  What one of those face powders costs (like $35-40) could buy a lot of groceries for some families.  She makes me so angry. 

 

She makes me angry because she and her fangirls will go on to bash some working women who may have expensive makeup,  supplements, and clothes. But, yet it's ok for Lori to have expensive things.  In a previous post, I didn't mean to bash Nikes and I totally get why some people are willing to pay more for good quality shoes. But, we all know that if some working mom decided to treat herself to expensive sneakers or even buy her kids a pair, Lori and her fangirls would be labeling them materialistic.

Last year, a fangirl posted about how she hadn't purchased her favorite perfume in several years and that she was going to save up a little bit of money to buy a bottle. She mentioned something to her husband and he sold sports jerseys to buy her perfume.  If that fangirl is happy being a SAHM and making sacrifices then good for her. But, it was still ridiculous for that fangirl to look up to Lori who can't relate to her struggles. I doubt Ken has ever sold anything to buy something for Lori.  

It pissed me off a few months back when Lori had that post about getting a house and free stuff for a being stay at a home wife to Ken. She mentioned getting "free" cable and spending money. Again, some of her fangirls are really struggling because their husbands don't make that much and/or they have a large family. 

[louisa05]

45 minutes ago, freealljs said:

Basic roadside assistance is a fancy policy to Liam? Yeesh, I'm glad that I'm not married to him.  Should I have God on speed dial when something happens to my car?

And so his house is paid off, so he doesn't need house insurance. I live in an area heavily affected by Hurricane Michael.  Tell that to my neighbors who lost their homes.  Some of them didn't have house insurance and lived to regret it.

 

We had a massive hail storm in our community seven years ago. Baseball sized hail with 90 mph winds. As someone put it, it was like having a 1000 MLB pitchers standing in your yard throwing fastballs at your house over and over. Literally 100% of structures in town had to have new roofs. Most buildings had to have some new windows as well. And siding was shredded on one side of most houses. Windows were busted out of vehicles that were outside or on the road, and you can imagine what the rest of the vehicles looked like. 

The morning after, I was in my yard picking up sticks and branches and the idiot neighbor across the street was doing the same. Their windows were all busted out on one side, roof destroyed like everyone's, and the front screen and door badly damaged and the siding on the front of the house shredded. She came across the street to chat and told me that they didn't have any property or car insurance.  And she said this: "I mean why pay for it? When do you ever need it?". 

"Today, Karen, you need it today."  (And her name really is Karen. She may be the person that started that). 

Their house still hasn't been repaired at all. They literally still have boarded up windows seven years later. The only thing they repaired was the windows on their van. 

[Alisamer]

17 hours ago, feministxtian said:

Let's not diss the Nike's. I'm cheap as fuck with my clothing but will shell out big bucks for shoes. I've broken bones in both my feet, broke one ankle twice (in different places) and the other one once. W/o proper shoes, I'd never make it w/o pain. I also shell out fairly big bucks for sandals too. They have to have the formed arch/heel support in them (Birkenstock style) for me to be able to wear them and walk around w/o pain. 

I'm getting to that point. I once got a stress fracture in my foot from wearing flat, non-supportive shoes, and I have the beginnings of Plantar Fasciitis (I'm sure I spelled that wrong) which my mom had so bad she was in a boot for two years and had to have surgery. I'm wearing my running shoes most of the time these days, but was really wanting a good pair of sandals for summer. After a lot of research I decided to use a bit of extra money I have coming in to invest in a pair of leather Birkenstocks. They cost 4 times what the knockoffs cost, but in reading the reviews it sounds like they'll last at least 10 times as long, so in the long run it'll be worth it. I expect I'll be wearing those every summer for decades.

That said, Lori just seems to buy expensive stuff because it's expensive and she can. A significant portion of my wardrobe these days is from thrift and bargain stores, those sandals are going to cost more than the whole rest of my outfit put together basically all the time. 

There's got to be a balance. In the long run, for me, shelling out for good shoes will probably save a lot of money on medical bills. I'm not convinced that $14 a pound organic butter is really that much of a benefit. 

And I'm SURE that enduring crushing poverty just so mom can stay home with the kids is not of benefit to the kids. Stress is not good for kids. Worried, stressed, hungry, likely angry parents are not going to be the best parents they can be. Get a job, send the kids to school, and be able to spend the time you ARE with them as an involved parent, rather than worrying all the time. 

[lilwriter85]

2 hours ago, freealljs said:

Basic roadside assistance is a fancy policy to Liam? Yeesh, I'm glad that I'm not married to him.  Should I have God on speed dial when something happens to my car?

And so his house is paid off, so he doesn't need house insurance. I live in an area heavily affected by Hurricane Michael.  Tell that to my neighbors who lost their homes.  Some of them didn't have house insurance and lived to regret it.

 

There's evidence that Liam is a troll. I noticed that Lori removed her like from the post about not having medical insurance, auto, insurance, and other things. Maybe she's reading here. Or, maybe she looked at his FB profile and saw something on his profile pic that points to him being a troll.   I also think there's a chance Ken was reading through comments and got a troll vibe from Liam and checked out the profile. Ken isn't as stupid as Lori is and he may have told her his suspicions.  Liam's posts are still up.

The sad thing is that there are people who do some of the same things Liam claimed in order for a wife to stay at home and that's probably why some people here and on Lori's FB  believed his posts. I've heard of people who didn't have home insurance and they regretted when disaster struck.  

At this point, I'm curious to see how long Liam will stay trolling Lori and the fangirls. Is that Alyssa R. woman still trolling?

 

[SongRed7]

32 minutes ago, lilwriter85 said:

It pissed me off a few months back when Lori had that post about getting a house and free stuff for a being stay at a home wife to Ken. She mentioned getting "free" cable and spending money. Again, some of her fangirls are really struggling because their husbands don't make that much and/or they have a large family. 

I want to call BS on some of those stories, too. One fangirl was bragging how they survive on her husband's $11 an hour job and even though they are considered "poverty level" in their state (she didn't say which state or how many kids they had) that they were "doing just fine." (direct quote).  A male reader was calling her out on that saying she wasnt' being truthful.  I also call BS...either they are getting a lot of help, live with their parents, or are lying about their income, it doesn't add up. 

[SongRed7]

12 hours ago, lilwriter85 said:

Liam posted that his family is QF and just had their 8th child.

I'm also beginning to believe he's a troll.  He says he has 8 kids, but there's one picture on his profile of him and his supposed wife and one baby.  Plus he looks really young to have 8 kids. Also he supposed lives in LA as works as a Physical Therapist. I work in healthcare, and while PTs make decent money (average salary for experienced PT in Los Angeles is about $96,000) , not sure how he has a paid off house -- housing in California is also through the roof. . Plus he only has one "friend"   I vote troll. 

 

[lilwriter85]

3 minutes ago, SongRed7 said:

I want to call BS on some of those stories, too. One fangirl was bragging how they survive on her husband's $11 an hour job and even though they are considered "poverty level" in their state (she didn't say which state or how many kids they had) that they were "doing just fine." (direct quote).  A male reader was calling her out on that saying she wasnt' being truthful.  I also call BS...either they are getting a lot of help, live with their parents, or are lying about their income, it doesn't add up. 

I'm starting to wonder about that woman too.  I looked through the string of those comments yesterday. I also thought that it's possible that the woman and her family are getting assistance through the government or relatives. She said that her family wasn't on assistance and that they owned a home.  There was a fangirl a few years back that claimed her family lived in on 9k a year. I also recall one person claiming that her family of 10 was living on 20k.  Recently, a woman said that her family lived on 22k a year and they had savings. I looked at the woman's FB page, it looked they were living in small town Texas with two kids. It's possible the area they are in very low cost of living and that aren't too bad off. 

If  some people are trolling Lori and she believes them, then she deserves the egg on her face. I do think some of her fangirls' stories about sacrifices and struggling with money are truthful. It pissed me off when Lori or a fangirl mod deleted a commented yesterday from a woman who said her husband has PTSD and TBI from combat injuries and that she had to work nights for awhile.  I think that woman's story was true and she mentioned that she didn't like how people were judging working moms and another woman agreed with her. 

4 minutes ago, SongRed7 said:

I'm also beginning to believe he's a troll.  He says he has 8 kids, but there's one picture on his profile of him and his supposed wife and one baby.  Plus he looks really young to have 8 kids. Also he supposed lives in LA as works as a Physical Therapist. I work in healthcare, and while PTs make decent money (average salary for experienced PT in Los Angeles is about $96,000) , not sure how he has a paid off house -- housing in California is also through the roof. . Plus he only has one "friend"   I vote troll. 

 

Click on the profile pic and you'll see something that points to him being a troll and there is something on the photo with the wife and baby that points to him trolling. 

[SongRed7]

14 minutes ago, lilwriter85 said:

Click on the profile pic and you'll see something that points to him being a troll and there is something on the photo with the wife and baby that points to him trolling. 

hahahahahahahaha!    On his next post, someone should call him Frederico!   Good catch @lilwriter85

[quiversR4hunting]

44 minutes ago, lilwriter85 said:

Click on the profile pic and you'll see something that points to him being a troll and there is something on the photo with the wife and baby that points to him trolling.

I rarely go out and check these things out, especially after many FJers say there is an issue, I just trust a lot of the FJer's opinions. This time I did it, I went out to look at this guy.  I love the right click option of "search google for image". hehe

[lilwriter85]

Maybe, if Liam had listed a lower cost of living city on the FB profile, it might have made his "story" sound a bit believable.