Josh Harris Announced "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" Was Discontinued

[Howl]

35 minutes ago, DarkAnts said:

There are signs that things are not good right now. Audrey is clearly suffering. Jermey is being a grade A jerk.

Details? Link?  How is this manifesting in the public/social media sphere?

[quiversR4hunting]

10 minutes ago, Walking Cat Bed said:

I think my Baptist College had that as a non-credit class, which I had NO time for. Not that I'd have passed.

I was a curmudgeon even when I was trying to be a Good Christian tm.

I was joking. You are serious, there is a stupid class to be fake, smiley bobble heads? If you aren't being sarcastic (this world needs a sarcasm font) I am flabbergasted! 

I am sure they word it more eloquently about proselytizing and winning souls and being joyful to others and other BS. 

[DarkAnts]

3 minutes ago, Howl said:

Details? Link?  How is this manifesting in the public/social media sphere?

Jermey deleted his jerk post where he complained about how long it was taking Audrey to get ready for a date. Turns out she was putting Ember down for her nap.

[Walking Cat Bed]

7 minutes ago, quiversR4hunting said:

I was joking. You are serious, there is a stupid class to be fake, smiley bobble heads? If you aren't being sarcastic (this world needs a sarcasm font) I am flabbergasted! 

I am sure they word it more eloquently about proselytizing and winning souls and being joyful to others and other BS. 

I was also joking

 

I'm sure some of the super extra Bible study groups focused on the topic, of course. Not that I went to any of those.

[quiversR4hunting]

12 minutes ago, DarkAnts said:

Jermey deleted his jerk post where he complained about how long it was taking Audrey to get ready for a date. Turns out she was putting Ember down for her nap.

I had to look it up, she posted the above on June 25 and then on July 1 she posts they are expecting #2 in January. 

Edited July 19, 2019 by quiversR4hunting

[Denim Jumper]

9 hours ago, hoipolloi said:

Shannon's IG post from a few days ago is interesting.

Note the themes she says she wants to address in the musical she's creating:

I am intrigued by some of her hashtags...

[JermajestyDuggar]

1 hour ago, DarkAnts said:

Jermey deleted his jerk post where he complained about how long it was taking Audrey to get ready for a date. Turns out she was putting Ember down for her nap.

These two just come off like they’ve led a fairly easy and privileged life. That is partially why their marriage advice 5 minutes after they married was extra eye roll worthy to me. They were young, but they were also over privileged. They are finally having real difficulties in life and it seems that they are having a hard time dealing. 

[Letgo]

21 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

These two just come off like they’ve led a fairly easy and privileged life. That is partially why their marriage advice 5 minutes after they married was extra eye roll worthy to me. They were young, but they were also over privileged. They are finally having real difficulties in life and it seems that they are having a hard time dealing. 

I know nothing of Audrey's family, but Jeremy's parents' marriage was clearly dysfunctional and unhappy. The Roloffs were not very good role models for how to communicate within a marriage, resolve problems, or demonstrate kindness and forgiveness to one's spouse. Audrey and Jeremy also had to date, marry, have a child, and be married while in the public eye. They are no longer on the show but neither are they an anonymous couple. The early years of marriage and parenting can be especially difficult. Even more so when the couple thinks they have the answers from the beginning and THEN find out the hard way that they don't.

[louisa05]

I hope that is not an active track. 

My brother is an engineer for a major railroad. People who stop for pictures on the tracks is his recurring nightmare. That saying "you can't stop a train", it's a saying because it's truth. It's damn hard to quickly stop a train. 

[Howl]

50 minutes ago, louisa05 said:

My brother is an engineer for a major railroad. People who stop for pictures on the tracks is his recurring nightmare. That saying "you can't stop a train", it's a saying because it's truth. It's damn hard to quickly stop a train. 

My thoughts exactly, and there's a blind corner.  Also, why does seeing a trestle make them smile? 

That insta post made me think that at least some of their problems are due to, or at least exacerbated by, simple exhaustion and they could benefit by some SECULAR counseling on skillful communication. 

Me n' him are working with the John Gottman book, The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work.  I can tell from her post that there are a few things from that book that they need to implement, STAT!  Gottman even identifies the Four Horsemen of the (marital) Apocalypse:  Criticism, Defensiveness, Contempt and Stonewalling.  I bolded the ones that seemed to be called out in the Insta post. 

Just did a google search for Jeremy.  I didn't realize that their extended family is part of Little People, Big World reality show, although Jeremy seems to have withdrawn from the show. 

I just assumed he was related to the horrible Texan Lester Roloff. 

 

Edited July 19, 2019 by Howl

[louisa05]

@Howl I'm not kidding when I say it is my brother's recurring nightmare. It literally is. 

Union Pacific has had to run a program where they send information to professional photographers in every area telling them they absolutely cannot take photos on tracks and where to find inactive tracks if they must have those pictures. They had to stop a train in our area a couple of years ago because, in spite of all of that, a photographer was having a photo session with a high school volleyball team on the tracks at a crossing in a small town. 

They can't reach every idiot taking a selfie as efficiently, though. It's a serious problem. 

[Howl]

There was one railroad track death in my city last year involving a deaf high school girl walking on the tracks, I think coming or going from school.  

[Marmion]

On 10/22/2018 at 8:25 PM, Hane said:

Meanwhile, this douchebag cheated a generation of conservative Christian kids out of innocent, constructive pastimes like proms, movie dates, and other activities that would have helped them get to know each other in a healthy way before deciding to settle down. News flash, Joshie: Untold numbers of us dated regularly through our teen years and were still virgins (and not just “technical virgins”) when we got married. (That was important to me back then; my opinions have changed.)

Being that I was brought up in the Church of the Nazarene , I already had been forbidden to see movies in theaters , and dance , like at a prom . My experience was like the plot of the film Footloose  .  So , what I am trying to say is that , even if Joshua Harris hadn't published his book , there still would have been youth in certain sects ( cults ? ) whom are to this day prohibited from engaging in such past times .  On other related notes , I myself have never bothered to read  " I Kissed Dating Goodbye " . My sister did however , and she has yet to be married either , for various reasons , including perhaps that she's still involved , along with my folks , in a small exclusive fundamentalist sect ( cult ? ) , called the Bible Methodist Connection of Churches , which is like the Church of the Nazarene taken to the extreme .  Speaking of the Nazarenes , I have always thought that the only thing worse than either the Holiness movement  , or five point Calvinist Puritanism separately would be if somehow the two tendencies were to become merged together . And now I have found out here that this is exactly what has happened with regards to Sovereign Grace Ministries , which Joshua Harris used to be affiliated with . Like , can you imagine what it might be like to grow up in such an environment , considering its doctrine . You might feel insecure in your relationship with God , especially as a teenager , because you fear that you might not be perfectly good enough to stay in God's good graces , only to end up being told in reply that God might not have ever loved you to begin with, as you might not even be one of those He has favored to elect unto salvation .  In addition to bringing up my sister and I in the Holiness movement , my parents , when they decided to homeschool us both , initially made the mistake of using as curriculum Christian Liberty Press , which is pronouncely Calvinist , as well as Christian Reconstructionist .  https://icher.org/blog/?p=2112  So as much as I might not like it , I know first hand what both Puritanism , and Christian Perfectionism is like .  I find it to be nothing short of spiritual abuse . 

[seraaa]

Social media indicated they'd perhaps been turning away from fundamentalism, but I did not expect this

[Briefly]

2 hours ago, louisa05 said:

I hope that is not an active track. 

My brother is an engineer for a major railroad. People who stop for pictures on the tracks is his recurring nightmare. That saying "you can't stop a train", it's a saying because it's truth. It's damn hard to quickly stop a train. 

My brother is a fanatic about trains, he plans train related stops on any trips he takes.  Even when he came to see me early this month, we still had train stops and then he drove up to Kansas to look at a train or train-related place.  He is extremely careful and not one of those people your brother probably has to deal with, but he has lots of stories of people he's had to tell to back off and get off the tracks.  He wears extremely bright t-shirts when he is out taking pictures, but he sees lots of people that would be basically invisible from a moving train until it's too late. Which is actually also how the picture makes me think of the Rollofs - train substituting for reality, etc.

[Howl]

Years ago a co-worker had a brother who was rather obsessed with train derailments and would travel quite a way to see the aftermath.  This was way before internet, so not sure how he'd find out about them.  Another co-worker on that crew had a brother who was obsessed with circus elephants.  Good times. 

[louisa05]

2 hours ago, Briefly said:

My brother is a fanatic about trains, he plans train related stops on any trips he takes.  Even when he came to see me early this month, we still had train stops and then he drove up to Kansas to look at a train or train-related place.  He is extremely careful and not one of those people your brother probably has to deal with, but he has lots of stories of people he's had to tell to back off and get off the tracks.  He wears extremely bright t-shirts when he is out taking pictures, but he sees lots of people that would be basically invisible from a moving train until it's too late. Which is actually also how the picture makes me think of the Rollofs - train substituting for reality, etc.

My husband and a friend like to photograph trains and related places as well. They are extremely careful, too.

We tramped out into unmarked territory on vacation to see the only train tunnel in Nebraska, which has not been used since 1983. That was pretty cool. 

The biggest problem for UP lately is not the train buffs, who seem to be aware of how and why to be careful. The dangerous issue is that family, couples, wedding and senior photos walking on or otherwise posing on train tracks has been a stupid fad for a few years now. 

[klein_roeschen]

10 hours ago, louisa05 said:

I hope that is not an active track. 

My brother is an engineer for a major railroad. People who stop for pictures on the tracks is his recurring nightmare. That saying "you can't stop a train", it's a saying because it's truth. It's damn hard to quickly stop a train. 

From a look on the photo these are active tracks. The tracks are shiny silver instead of rust covered and  the growing weed between the tracks is to small and not enough to be inactive tracks. And they also standing on a bridge, so no possibility of jumping of the tracks if a train is coming. Stupid morons. My parents where working for the national railroad when I was a small kid and I grow up hearing stories about railroad accidents involving people and even lifestock and how they had to help clean up.

[Lgirlrocks]

My great uncle, who I never met, died when he was a kid. His family lived in a small house next to rail road tracks. He was run over by a train. This was back in the early 1900’s. Trains are nothing to mess with.

[JermajestyDuggar]

2 hours ago, Lgirlrocks said:

My great uncle, who I never met, died when he was a kid. His family lived in a small house next to rail road tracks. He was run over by a train. This was back in the early 1900’s. Trains are nothing to mess with.

I personally see it like taking family pictures on an old back road. Sure there might seem pretty quiet and hardly used, but it’s still dangerous. People don’t usually take family pictures standing in the middle of an old back road, so why take them on railroad tracks? 

[Flossie]

I was a passenger on a train a few years ago where we had to stop the train and wait.  And wait.  

Finally the engineer came over the speaker and told us what was happening.  We were supposed to pass over a trestle but a man was on it and refused to get off.  The trestle bridged a large ravine.  On one side of the ravine was a poverty stricken part of town, and most of the stores were on the other side.  Sometimes people who didn't have cars or didn't want to take a fairly long time on public transportation would just say fuck it and walk across the trestle.  That took 20 minutes. 

So this guy was almost across the trestle when he saw the cops waiting there.  The railroad was (and still is) pretty strict about this sort of thing and always prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.  He turned around and started back the way he came.  By the time he got to the other side of the trestle there were more cops waiting for him.  The cops were forbidden to go onto the trestle because of the danger, so the man walked to the center and sat down.  After shouting to him to just go to one end or the other and get it (the arrest) over with, the cops got permission to go out to get him.  We were being held up while cops from either end were making their way to the center.  Once they got close, the man threatened to jump or fight with them.  Eventually he decided to come quietly and they all made their way across.  He told the cops that he just wanted a pack of cigarettes.  (Hint:  if you're willing to risk your life to smoke, you should look into ways to stop smoking.)

No one got hurt, but we were waiting for at least an hour until we got the all clear to proceed.  Because we were being held up, several trains behind us also had to stop or pull off on sidetracks.  The same was happening to trains coming from the opposite direction.  As we got updates on the situation from the engineer, the anger in his voice was obvious.  No engineer wants to realize that the train he's running is about to hit something and he can't do anything to stop it, and they certainly don't want to hit another train.  Stay off the tracks!

[Howl]

My city has a commuter rail line; crossings have flashing lights and striped arms that come down to block the crossing.  At some crossings, the train whistle blows and blows as well. 

In contrast, on a trip to northern Mexico in the not so distant past, we were driving at night on a stretch of highway and noticed flashing lights, which was odd. As we got closer, we realized (just in time) that a train was crossing the highway and the "flashing" lights were the headlights of a car on the other side of the train, visible for a second between each passing train car.  Major highway, totally unmarked train crossing.  What could possibly go wrong?  

But anyway, back to Shannon and Josh.  

Somebody in that family is making serious bank. 

Josh took his wife and kids, moved to Canada and went to seminary for a few years.  Tuition, fees, rent, living expenses for a family of five with a stay at home wife.  Who bankrolled that?

It's not sounding like Shannon is working two jobs to make ends meet as a now single mom.  It doesn't seem like she's working at all. 

And let me just say, to whoever started the "I kissed marriage goodbye" topic that was subsumed into this thread -- I loved that title. 

Edited July 20, 2019 by Howl

[Spinosaurus]

Josh seems to have kissed yapping on about god goodbye as well.*  I checked his website's 'about' page.  Directly quoting:

 

Quote

In high school, I fell in love with words while publishing a magazine for teenagers. My first book was published when I was twenty-one and became a best-seller (for more about that journey, read this statement about my book). Later as a preacher I practiced [sic] translating ancient, often complex concepts into language people would understand and remember.

Then I shook up my life in a big way: I stepped away from leading a large church and moved to Vancouver, B.C., to attend graduate school. I studied a mind-expanding mixture of art, religion, history, culture, documentary film-making, and content marketing. Now I run my own marketing and brand strategy company, Clear & Loud, and use the power of story to help businesses connect with customers.

Very little Jesusing in that.

I never got a closetty type of vibe from him, mainly because his books didn't go on about gay people (NB: I have shitty gaydar), but does anyone think he might be going to come out as an atheist/secularist?  It sounds bizarre, but more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than etc etc.

*Why couldn't he have called that film 'I Kissed I Kissed Dating Goodbye Goodbye'?  Talk about a missed opportunity.

[kpmom]

My area recently began a high speed train connecting us to several counties to the south, and eventually several counties to the north.

That thing comes SO fast there is almost no time to get off the tracks before it's  on you.

It's only been up and running about two years and we've already had 3-4 deaths.  Some have blamed it on the train company, but seriously, they've put warning signs up, there is a warning horn, lights etc.  Not sure what else could be done. 

[louisa05]

@Spinosaurus That's extremely not Jesus-y. No Jesus at all. Perhaps their journey away from evangelicalism is taking them both in different directions. 

I finished the film yesterday but quite some time after my first post as I had other things to do. 

The biggest issue I have with it is that at the end he is still clinging to the notion that it must have helped some people and that it must be a viable choice for the right people. It's a weird conclusion as the only people he talks to in the film are telling him how bad it was. One person confronts him with the fact that marriage rates dropped in the churches who wholly adopted it in the 90s/00s and that young adults were basically scared to even speak to people of the other gender, because the book and their pastors made it sound like talking to each other might need to result in a marriage. The only positive view in the film is a pastor going on about how courtship shows to the outside world that churches are set apart and different. 

He also interviews a guy who wrote a book called Courtship in Crisis: The Case for Traditional Dating.  The title was familiar so I looked back and discovered I have read this one (Thanks, Goodreads!). This guy pretty expertly takes apart the problems with courtship, particularly noting--which Harris concedes can be true--that young people can learn about relationships from dating and that love is not limited.  BUT my Goodreads review helped remind me what I thought was bad about this book: it replaces the courtship formula with a very specific dating formula. I can't remember the details but I do remember that the author is enamored with the idea that his grandparents went out with different people all the time and advocates some form of constantly dating different people--from day to day even--rather than having very committed relationships. In my Goodreads review, I wrote that churches need to let people develop relationships in the ways that work for them rather than all of this attempting to turn it into one very specific formula. But if I learned nothing else in my time in evangelical world, I learned that they love a formula. Especially if it can be condensed into a sermon with 3-5 alliterative bullet points.