Sparkling Adventures Pt 10 - David Pleads Guilty - Merge

[treehugger]

There's a whole bunch of WTF in her latest post http://www.sparklingadventures.com/index.php?id=2066

I really appreciate her attempts to teach her girls about consent - but she always takes everything too damn far.  She doesn't neglect her children, she just won't brush their hair because body ownership! 

And don't even get me started with the whole educating your 11 year old about graphic online porn and then giving her unmonitored internet access because trust.  

 

[DaffyDill]

1 hour ago, treehugger said:

There's a whole bunch of WTF in her latest post http://www.sparklingadventures.com/index.php?id=2066

I really appreciate her attempts to teach her girls about consent - but she always takes everything too damn far.  She doesn't neglect her children, she just won't brush their hair because body ownership! 

And don't even get me started with the whole educating your 11 year old about graphic online porn and then giving her unmonitored internet access because trust.  

 

I'm on board with some things she says...but yes, @treehuggershe usually takes things too far! I can't imagine wanting to go shopping for sex toys with my mother, yet that's what she intends to do if the girls wish. 

And asking a baby for permission to change it's nappy (diaper)...? Then again, she did say it's a rhetorical question so...

Sometimes kids have to do as an adult asks them, because the adult knows better, an example would be teeth cleaning. What does she do if her girls refused to clean their teeth? Let them have a cavity ridden mouth as some sort of lesson? 

[VaSportsMom]

There's a whole bunch of WTF in her latest post http://www.sparklingadventures.com/index.php?id=2066

I really appreciate her attempts to teach her girls about consent - but she always takes everything too damn far.  She doesn't neglect her children, she just won't brush their hair because body ownership! 

And don't even get me started with the whole educating your 11 year old about graphic online porn and then giving her unmonitored internet access because trust.  

 

I tried to read that post but I had to call it quits. She's uses 100 words to make a point when 10 would suffice. I assume she thinks that it makes her look more intelligent but I must disagree.

[ILoveJellybeans]

7 hours ago, DaffyDill said:

I'm on board with some things she says...but yes, @treehuggershe usually takes things too far! I can't imagine wanting to go shopping for sex toys with my mother, yet that's what she intends to do if the girls wish. 

And asking a baby for permission to change it's nappy (diaper)...? Then again, she did say it's a rhetorical question so...

Sometimes kids have to do as an adult asks them, because the adult knows better, an example would be teeth cleaning. What does she do if her girls refused to clean their teeth? Let them have a cavity ridden mouth as some sort of lesson? 

Yes, she does. She has posted before about how her children rarely brush their teeth.

[closetcagebaby]

7 hours ago, DaffyDill said:

I'm on board with some things she says...but yes, @treehuggershe usually takes things too far! I can't imagine wanting to go shopping for sex toys with my mother, yet that's what she intends to do if the girls wish. 

And asking a baby for permission to change it's nappy (diaper)...? Then again, she did say it's a rhetorical question so...

Sometimes kids have to do as an adult asks them, because the adult knows better, an example would be teeth cleaning. What does she do if her girls refused to clean their teeth? Let them have a cavity ridden mouth as some sort of lesson? 

I'm on board with a lot of it, but yeah, definitely a step too far for some!

I have a Swedish friend whose single mom bought her and her sister their first vibrators and maintained a pretty open dialogue about sex and sex toys through their adulthood without it being weird or abnormal. 

[justwatching]

WTH is that picture!???!

[treehugger]

I have asked my children for permission to hug them and tickle them, because I do want them to have a proper ownership of their bodies and I want them to be comfortable saying "no" if they want to for things like that.  So no disagreement with her there from me.  BUT, I am also their mother, and as such, I am responsible for their health and well being until they are old enough and mature enough to take care of that business themselves.  My girls are very young still (3 and 1), so I don't ask them permission to brush their teeth or bathe them or change diapers, because neglecting that compromises their well-being. I will tell them in advance what we are going to do, and we sometimes try to find a compromise if we are having problems (ie. My oldest daughter got a hair cut because she hated getting her hair brushed).

i absolutely think it's wonderful that Lauren is trying to have open, honest discussion with her daughters about sex.  But her oldest is 11.  And in my very humble opinion Lauren needs to mother up a bit and start caring about what her daughter does online - the Internet is full of very strange people.  And IMHO, if she needs to use necrophilia as an example of something sexual that she haven't yet taught them, she may be going a bit far.  

[ViolaSebastian]

Maybe I'm an old prude who listens to the man, but there's no way in hell I'd let my four young daughters participate in "clothes optional gatherings" with naked adults no matter how "non-sexual" they are. 

Quote

As I’ve reflected on this subject today, I realise that I’ve haven’t yet talked with the girls about necrophilia and zoophilia.

Quote

I also believe it’s important to encourage empowered masturbation within girls so they are less likely to participate in dodgy or mediocre sexual affairs.

Yes, nothing encourages empowered masturbation (what the hell does that even mean? Is there non-empowered masturbation?) like living in a van with no personal space whatsoever. 

[Granwych]

10 hours ago, DaffyDill said:

I'm on board with some things she says...but yes, @treehuggershe usually takes things too far! I can't imagine wanting to go shopping for sex toys with my mother, yet that's what she intends to do if the girls wish. 

And asking a baby for permission to change it's nappy (diaper)...? Then again, she did say it's a rhetorical question so...

Sometimes kids have to do as an adult asks them, because the adult knows better, an example would be teeth cleaning. What does she do if her girls refused to clean their teeth? Let them have a cavity ridden mouth as some sort of lesson? 

Remember, this is a woman who wouldn't remove a prickle from her kid's eye because the kid didn't want her to.  I am still shuddering about that one. 

[sparkles]

I'd lay odds that her throwing in the bit about teaching her four young girls about necrophilia and zoophilia was purely for shock value. 

 

Not that I'd put it past her, mind you, but she loves throwing shit like that out there to rile up the inauthentic, unenlightened non-sparkly ones. 

[wotdancer]

I'm not a fan of forcing children to let others touch them - for instance, making little kids hug grandma or uncle or long-lost-friend - and I make it a point to not ask or pressure children to hug me (I love when my nieces hug me, but if they don't want to, we usually high-five and call it a good day!) But an 11 year old exploring the internet alone is asking for big trouble in my book....

[Blahblah]

I just got around to reading her sex-ed manifesto. Every single thing that I read reinforced my belief that The Sparkling One is a narcissist.

i do agree with some of her stated actions but, as pointed out by others here, yet again she veers off into loony territory. Body ownership, yes. Asking permission to assist toddlers with basic hygiene? What?

And letting a vulnerable 11 year old venture into cyberspace alone with no parental controls? I have no words.

edited to add that I have an 11 year old girl so I do look at her and compare/contrast her with the sparkly kids and what they go through. My girl has had sex-Ed chats with me but I see no need to discuss in graphic detail all the stuff that The Sparkling One is claiming to have discussed. Sheesh, let kids be kids while they can. There is such a thing as age appropriateness. MissBlah is coming to terms with early puberty. I'm not going to inflict graphic discussions about necrophilia on the poor kid.

[docmom]

All you need to say to any kid about necrophilia or zoophilia is that any sexual contact in which one of the parties cannot or will not consent is wrong.  No need to go into any details.  If her kids ever encounter these philias they'll be able to work it out for themselves.

[DomWackTroll]

"I don’t need to introduce the idea that there are some people out there who prey on children."

Yes. You. Do. Especially if you're allowing your innocent girlchildren to run around naked at festivals where the nudity of adult males-- many of whom are indulging in mind-altering substances-- is expected and rarely if ever questioned. 

"Sex positive" feminists really need to address their blind spots. Penises are still used as weapons even though it's the year 2016 and "Not All Men." And a man isn't harmless just because he has dreadlocks and reeks of patchouli. 

[DaisyD]

Wait. She's going to talk about necrophilia, but not sexual assault?  I don't know about you all, but one of those topics is MUCH more relevant to my sphere of concern than the other. 

[missegeno]

Especially considering that the issue with necrophilia is, at its root, the inability to consent, thus making it a form of sexual assault and not actually a topic warranting specific and separate lessons.

[ILoveJellybeans]

Sooooooooooooooooooooooooo Lauren is allowing her 11 year old to have full, unsupervised internet access without parental controls, and allows her children to mix unsupervised with a bunch of adults at nudist events, and has yet to tell her that there are people out there who will prey on children. That is such a bad idea. Has she at least taught Aisha not to give out personal information on the internet or agree to meet up with anyone?

[apandaaries]

6 hours ago, ILoveJellybeans said:

Sooooooooooooooooooooooooo Lauren is allowing her 11 year old to have full, unsupervised internet access without parental controls, and allows her children to mix unsupervised with a bunch of adults at nudist events, and has yet to tell her that there are people out there who will prey on children. That is such a bad idea. Has she at least taught Aisha not to give out personal information on the internet or agree to meet up with anyone?

Given that she allows the children to use their iPads without time limits, I'd also wager money that the other girls are allowed unfettered, unsupervised Internet time as well.  

Predators know how to look for potential prey.  I have the terrible suspicion that those lovely girls might seem neglected enough to respond to grooming and other advances.  It's not as if they have an attentive and protective mother standing in the wings watching over them.  I truly hope she's discussed basic Internet safety with them, but I'm sure in Lauren-land, that constitutes some kind of fear-based parenting tactic.  

[Koala]

There's different parenting styles, I get that- but this isn't a different parenting style.  This is neglect and endangerment.  She is denying them the security of having  parents that parent.  Instead, she expects them to parent themselves (something they are not capable of doing), even going so far as have them call her Lauren.  

You aren't their friend Lauren, and they aren't fellow travelers or whatever stupid shit you've cooked up.  They are little kids.  Little kids who've lost their brother and their father in the most horrific of ways. You are a mama, and you have 4 little girls who need love, guidance, and stability.  They need someone who can see around corners and has some life experience.  They don't have any business running wild at whatever the hell these gatherings are...I can't believe children are even allowed in places like that.  My fucking god...what kind of mother would have that anyway???  

They shouldn't have to part with another brother because you've got some half baked idea that this is what YOU and two other adults need.

I rarely say this, but I hope authorities will step in and remove those children.  I think they have a stable aunt...maybe she could raise them.  But Lauren needs help.  A lot of help- and those poor girls shouldn't have to grow up waiting for her to get it.

 

[AliceInFundyland]

It's really remarkable how she turns something that ought to be good...like teaching your kids about sex and being comfortable with their bodies...and just goes way the fuck over the top. I feel like I have this thought every time with her.

[Aurora rising]

A rainbow friend of mine has some similar ideas to the sparkling one. She has a wonderful daughter. Said daughter is running around on festivals, concerts etc. BUT I saw more than once that she is shouting at people who want to touch her (like hugging her or things like this) to leave her alone and one time she was biting an extremely annoying woman in the hand. You go, girl...

My friend said she teached her from the beginning that if her parents are not there, she should scream as loud as she can and bite and scratch and kick. Good one....

[mstee]

On March 12, 2016 at 10:24 AM, justwatching said:

WTH is that picture!???!

Right there with you. What is that??

[Mirla]

29 minutes ago, mstee said:

Right there with you. What is that??

It looks like a tree root to me.  My parents' tree had several roots that were above ground like that.  Most of them had similar wounds.  I always assumed it was from the lawn mower, but I'm not sure.

 

[StepMonsterInLA]

FJ stop bumping this gal. I need her outta my brain. Is she fundie? 

[Jezzable]

2 hours ago, mstee said:

Right there with you. What is that??

Some kind of tree root that is shaped like a female's vulva.