Are JB and Michelle getting worse?

[FreeHannie!]

My father is going to be 70 in December and his give a shit factor is so small it's actually funny.

I'm only 25, but I've notice my 'give a shit' factor has rapidly declined since I left high school lol.

[FreeHannie!]

I did recently watch the Josiah arm "pull" episode and in and earlier section from that show, a viewer asked what would happen if one of the kids "accidentally kissed someone". JB kind of laughed it off, but Michelle got a coldness in her voice and face and when she responded and said something like "Well, they shouldn't be doing that or something". She looked almost angry to me, and I got a weird vibe from her. I think some of the Courting rules are really more from her.

I get the impression Michelle is the one setting the rules, and since Boob is the type of husband who adores his wife and is still a little in awe of her (I maintain he still can't believe he got a pretty cheerleader to marry him), he just goes along with what she wants.

[Trynn]

I'm only 25, but I've notice my 'give a shit' factor has rapidly declined since I left high school lol.

Actually, I think I was just BORN without the give a shit factor.

[Miggy]

I don't think Jim Bob is evil, just incredibly stupid. He says and does the first thing that pops into his head. Most of us have a little filter that we run our thoughts threw before we open our mouths. JB doesn't.

He has always been obsessed with sex but in the early shows, the talk is all direct at or about Michelle. Now his daughters are adults and getting married so he talks about them. The speeches sound eleventy million times worse because he is talking about his daughters but what he says hasn't changed. He doesn't stop and think "Discussing my daughters future sex life on television is not appropriate." I actually think he would be devastated if he understood how creepy "normal" people find his behaviour.

Michelle I see more as lost. She spent twenty years being the amazing mother, either pregnant or with a baby. She doesn't know where she fits now. It's a bit sad that she defined herself as a mother only in terms of babies. Josie needs a mum for fifteen more years but Michelle is focused on grandbabies.

[HarleyQuinn]

Everyone is saying jana is the discontent one (and I agree) but I feel like Jinger is getting right up there with her. She looks downright depressed half the time now.

[Miggy]

I moved when I was 14. I was so excited - I loved the new house and was excited about the new school and new people. My best friend was devastated. She had to return to our old school and try and find a new place in the social structure.

Jana and Jinger are in the same position. They are both loosing their best friends, as Jill and Jessa get married. Due to the "family are you best friends" they don't have many to choose from. Jinger and Joy seem to have been together, at least on Instagram, but she is probably quite lonely. Jana has no one.

[Rescinded and Mended]

I'm only 25, but I've notice my 'give a shit' factor has rapidly declined since I left high school lol.

And it will only continue to plummet as you get older, especially with any major life crisis or longterm illness in the family. ;) I am finding, especially in the last year, that not only am I quite capable of telling someone to go to hell, I'm more than happy to give 'em directions if they don't get the point the first time.

I think the situations with Jim Bob and his daughters are scripted, but I've met people in real life who get awkward and nervous if there is silence for too long, and they think the best way to fill what they feel is an awkward pause is to make stupid, inappropriate jokes. But I agree that it's really crossing a line to make such jokes to your daughters.

I'd love to see someone stop JB at some point and say, without joking at all, "Boy, you really like to think about sex a lot, don't you?" I seriously wonder how he would respond to that.

[N The Prayer Closet]

Oh, yeah, JB and Michelle are insufferable. What's bothering me right now is the amount of time they are spending away from their kids. They have what?--9 little kids still at home?--and they are traveling out of state several times per week to promote political candidates. WHY?!?! They've always said their family is first but I think their image and their own religious-crazy-shove-it-down-your-throat-look-at-me is really more important. I guess Grandma Duggar gets to do 70 loads of laundry a week and take care of a baseball team while they eat good food and get worshiped by their fans.

[HarleyQuinn]

He'd probably say something like "Well yeah, look how many kids I have" then do that stupid laugh of his.

JB creeps me out. Maybe even more so now that I know I'm not the only one.

Since there was talk about the "siblings being only friends" in the event someone goes full Lannister, wasn't there another fundie family that that sort of happened to? Like two familes lived together on a compound for a long time and some of them got married to the children of the other family they were raised with? I know it's not the same thing, but it made me think of it.

[paintergurl]

Full Lannister hahahahaha !! very funny! But seriously, that is something I have squeamishly wondered about, too. All those repressed hormones in one enclosed space. Scary.

[N The Prayer Closet]

Everyone is saying jana is the discontent one (and I agree) but I feel like Jinger is getting right up there with her. She looks downright depressed half the time now.

Yes!! She is barely talking in the THs. She was once so bubbly and giggly.

[CaroMoon]

freejosiah wrote:

Everyone is saying jana is the discontent one (and I agree) but I feel like Jinger is getting right up there with her. She looks downright depressed half the time now.

Yes!! And Jinger seems extremely skinny lately. I always had a soft spot for her, i adore her artsy quirky side. I hope she gets out.

P.s. can anyone tell me how you quote someone with the separate yellow box? or a direct reply to someones message on the forum? When I press quote it shows up differently. New to FJ, thanks!

[Sundaymorning]

Yes, the whole fundie "transfer of authority" thing from the father to the husband is just creepy. I just cringe at all the weird announcements and photos my family has received for the father-daughter purity balls. Thank goodness those weren't around in the 80's!

Also, when familes take the "Date Night with Dad" thing a little too far. I really don't think they even realize how weird this behavior is to most people.

I don't think JB has done anything to any of his kids, but I have wondered if something happened to Michelle as a child or teen. Maybe the extreme sheltering and control of her own daughters is a way she feels she can protect them.

This. Fathers or other male role models are important for daughters. And they should spend quality time with their daughters regularly and treat them and other women well, also to set en example for their daughters how a decent man should treat a woman. But calling some one-on-one time with your father a "date" is quite horrible if you ask me.

[FreeHannie!]

Yes!! She is barely talking in the THs. She was once so bubbly and giggly.

All that sass and spark that made her my first 'Duggar fave' has sadly been completely beaten out of her, probably thanks to JTTH.

Both Jana and Jinger look like they need a therapist. Poor girls.

[Rebelwife]

This. Fathers or other male role models are important for daughters. And they should spend quality time with their daughters regularly and treat them and other women well, also to set en example for their daughters how a decent man should treat a woman. But calling some one-on-one time with your father a "date" is quite horrible if you ask me.

I think whether the "date" thing is creepy depends on context. When our two daughters were little (like 8 and under) my husband would occasionally take one of them off for some one-on-one time - to dinner or a baseball game or something similar. We called them "daddy daughter dates" jokingly. With young kids like that I wouldn't think anything of it; it was just a cutesy name for him spending some special time with them. Now that they're teenagers, though, I would find it creepy to call it a date.

[Sundaymorning]

I think whether the "date" thing is creepy depends on context. When our two daughters were little (like 8 and under) my husband would occasionally take one of them off for some one-on-one time - to dinner or a baseball game or something similar. We called them "daddy daughter dates" jokingly. With young kids like that I wouldn't think anything of it; it was just a cutesy name for him spending some special time with them. Now that they're teenagers, though, I would find it creepy to call it a date.

Yeah, but you called them dates jokingly. Nothing wrong with that. Those fundies actually mean it. That's a huge difference.

Many of them think that the father should be a boyfriend substitute for their daughters.

Quote from such a Dad: “You are married to the Lord and your father is your boyfriend.â€

(source aattp.org/purity-ball-dad-you-are-married-to-the-lord-and-your-father-is-your-boyfriend-video/)

Now thats highly creepy.

[nastyhobbitses]

This. Fathers or other male role models are important for daughters. And they should spend quality time with their daughters regularly and treat them and other women well, also to set en example for their daughters how a decent man should treat a woman. But calling some one-on-one time with your father a "date" is quite horrible if you ask me.

It's super creepy. Though when I was little, my dad would set aside Sundays to spend quality time with me (play video games, go out to a diner for breakfast, go to the park, watch movies), and he'd call them "Dad-Daughter Day"/"Dad-Daughter Date", and it wasn't weird or creepy at all.

[Miggy]

Daddy-daughter days are normal. No different to Girls Day Out. Well, except that Daughter and I usually spend the day shopping then go somewhere for lunch where Husband and Daughter would go bike riding or bush walking.

The difference between that and the fundy "dates" is that we see it as a parent spending time with their child not the father acting as a boyfriend substitute.

[Walking Cat Bed]

All that sass and spark that made her my first 'Duggar fave' has sadly been completely beaten out of her, probably thanks to JTTH.

Both Jana and Jinger look like they need a therapist. Poor girls.

A real, state-licensed therapist. And a weekend away from raising siblings that ISN'T in Gothardland.

[Mythicwings]

Yeah, but you called them dates jokingly. Nothing wrong with that. Those fundies actually mean it. That's a huge difference.

Many of them think that the father should be a boyfriend substitute for their daughters.

Quote from such a Dad: “You are married to the Lord and your father is your boyfriend.â€

(source aattp.org/purity-ball-dad-you-are-married-to-the-lord-and-your-father-is-your-boyfriend-video/)

Now thats highly creepy.

:pink-shock: :angry-screaming: :angry-screaming: :angry-screaming: holy crap

[Katie_Bug]

Yeah, but you called them dates jokingly. Nothing wrong with that. Those fundies actually mean it. That's a huge difference.

Many of them think that the father should be a boyfriend substitute for their daughters.

Quote from such a Dad: “You are married to the Lord and your father is your boyfriend.â€

(source aattp.org/purity-ball-dad-you-are-married-to-the-lord-and-your-father-is-your-boyfriend-video/)

Now thats highly creepy.

That is incredibly disturbing; no child should look at her father in a sexual manner. Whoever thought that up read way too much Freud!

[LongDogMom]

I think it's weird and ironic that JB and M are so ultra concerned with purity and chastity and nothing that could tempt lustful thoughts, and yet JB is constantly talking about sex. I mean, in a normal family, a father rarely brings up sex in front of his daughters. With the Duggars there always this undercurrent of it running through everything...from having to hold it at bay so they must wear old fashioned swimsuits that cover everything lest they give lustful thoughts to the men and boys to no frontal hugs or hand holding. It's like all the rules to avoid sex and sexual thought seem to keep it on everyone's mind constantly! And stuff like JB dry humping Michelle on the mini golf course on their "date" with Ben and Jessa was just gross. I mean, what parents do that? That is just wrong and icky. If they are so about purity, why are they talking about and almost teasing their kids with sexual innuendo and comments about sexual activity? They are just not right in the head imo. People who are that obsessed with sex are strange.

I'm not sure the Duggars are getting worse, but the kids are getting older and so the way they are treating them and setting rules for their grown children is looking more and more odd. When the kids were little it was brushed off, but it's not normal to treat your grown daughters the way they treat theirs or have all these weird rules about touching and kissing and hand holding. I mean, no hand holding till you are engaged?! Sorry,l that is way beyond weird to me.

[SassyPants]

I think it's weird and ironic that JB and M are so ultra concerned with purity and chastity and nothing that could tempt lustful thoughts, and yet JB is constantly talking about sex. I mean, in a normal family, a father rarely brings up sex in front of his daughters. With the Duggars there always this undercurrent of it running through everything...from having to hold it at bay so they must wear old fashioned swimsuits that cover everything lest they give lustful thoughts to the men and boys to no frontal hugs or hand holding. It's like all the rules to avoid sex and sexual thought seem to keep it on everyone's mind constantly! And stuff like JB dry humping Michelle on the mini golf course on their "date" with Ben and Jessa was just gross. I mean, what parents do that? That is just wrong and icky. If they are so about purity, why are they talking about and almost teasing their kids with sexual innuendo and comments about sexual activity? They are just not right in the head imo. People who are that obsessed with sex are strange.

I'm not sure the Duggars are getting worse, but the kids are getting older and so the way they are treating them and setting rules for their grown children is looking more and more odd. When the kids were little it was brushed off, but it's not normal to treat your grown daughters the way they treat theirs or have all these weird rules about touching and kissing and hand holding. I mean, no hand holding till you are engaged?! Sorry,l that is way beyond weird to me.

:clap:

[Coco]

It was so evident when Michelle squeezed into the middle seat in Ben's truck last season. I just wanted to scream, what are you doing there?

[FreeHannie!]

Oh god these people are so creepy. My father used to do 'Daddy/Daughter time' with me and my sister, but thankfully he did things like taking us to see 'The Parent Trap' or to get a Poutine and go Iceskating or something.