Maxwell grandfather funeral

[Coco]

Link please! :D

I think you have to subscribe to those (to get the most current one)

titus2.com/corners

[anjulibai]

I think you have to subscribe to those (to get the most current one)

titus2.com/corners

Someone posted a link once, I just don't remember it.

I also thought the admin said it was okay to post these since it's open to the public to sign-up for the e-mails.

[anjulibai]

Oh, never mind, I found it on my browser: dads.titus2.com.

[Coco]

Oh, never mind, I found it on my browser: dads.titus2.com.

Thanks! I'm still learning my way around the blogs.

[anjulibai]

It starts out by saying Steve was once in Mexican restaurant and the owner said that a desert was so good "you'll die for it". Then Steve muses about having heard that phrase or "to die for" before. Then he asks what you are willing to do for? Then he asks what is so important to give your life each day? Then he says it's one thing to die, but it's another thing to live as a sacrifice to something. Then a Bible quote and he says the answer to these questions reveals who we are before God.

Very blah, not totally snark-worthy, but I wonder what to think of it in the context of the deaths of his mother and father-in-law. I'm assuming he felt his FIL lived a worthy live, but I wonder how he felt about his mother.

[anjulibai]

Thanks! I'm still learning my way around the blogs.

Welcome! I had to search for it. I wonder why they post it online but then have you opt in by e-mail. Seems odd.

[usmcmom]

Did anybody else notice this at the end of the blog post:

"The thought I want to leave you with is where are you headed? Are you following Christ? Are you impacting the world for Him? If you were to die, what would people say about you?

"For me to live IS Christ, and to die IS gain"

Philippians 1:21"

*****

I didn't scan through to see if this is standard for the blogger; but I wondered if Steve had his hand in composing this post.

[OkToBeTakei]

Somebody hold my hand and pat me comfortingly for I will never get used to seeing ALL aspects of life/death now photographed :( Specifically in the picture where the woman is behind the family and snapping away with her compact. I'm just so old fashioned.

Other things.

Gigi is an exceptionally beautiful looking lady. Really gorgeous.

They sang.......oh joy (sarcasm.)

Is it common to carry the coffin low as seen in the picture or is it just because they were lowering it to the stand or like where I am from is it carried shoulder high?

[thoughtful]

It just blows my mind the Maxwells haven't mentioned this on the blog. Gigi and Grandpa lived next door, for gods sake, this must be a huge and emotional event for them.

They even mentioned Grandpa in their Memorial Day post but didn't mention his death.

This is a family that documents dusting the ceiling fans, making burrito filling for the eleventy hundredth time, documents every time Uriah has a minor maintenance procedure. All posted about in detail with posed photos. But they don't mention the death of Teri's father, the man who has lived next door to them for years? They mention the deaths of random "elderly" who they preach at, but both Steve and Teri's parents have recently died without being mentioned or memorialised.

You'd think they would at least mention that Grandpa was now with Jesus, just to give Steve an opportunity to ask if we all knew where we are going when we die.

The posed happy pictures from Sunday dinner are really creepy when one knows they were taken two days after Grandpa's funeral.

This is what I was thinking when I posted on the other thread -- not sure I really said it, though.

The Titus2 blog is one of those "here is every detail of our life" blogs. Sometimes it's quasi-organized, with a story line (like the chicken post) or a point of view, but usually it is just the blahblahblah of the Maxwells' lives.

So it feels really odd that, rather than at least mentioning the deaths, or posting a dignified post about the beloved people who died, or just . . . oh, I don't know . . . not blogging for a week or so, they just skipped it. It's like they are pretending that . . . well, I don't know what.

It's not that I begrudge the Maxwells their way of grieving or how public they want to be about the deaths. It just feels so odd, when they continue posting the usual crap.

[MamaJunebug]

OKtoBeTakei, in my recent experience, most caskets are not carried shoulder height. In fact, they aren't carried so much as rolled along on a gurney type thing, which if I remember correctly is visible in Grandads funeral photos.

Thoughtful, I would say of the blog post – and I'm just telling it like I am guessing it here – they needed to post something because of, simply, the profit motive!

Got to keep yourself in front of your customers and public, after all. If too much time goes by without a blog post, they might forget about you, or go to the next thing.

From a practical standpoint, I can see why they wouldn't want to mention granddad's death in the typical blog. Here's my "trying to think like Steve Maxwell "reasoning:

"If we mention Rex's death, we will get a lot of sympathy responses, but it really won't sell many books and certainly won't book any conferences. Also, we will have to spend too much time writing, 'thank you.'

"Also, people will think it odd that we haven't shown any photos of the ceremony or service sending granddad off to heaven. (If indeed he went to heaven which is not altogether certain, since he wasn't me!)

"And photos of the ceremony show us looking sad, and vulnerable – especially my beloved dear darling wife Teri – and is that the image we want to give of a confident, happy, hard-working, Stevely family? I think not!!

"Besides which, Teri told me that under no circumstances am I to make her dad's funeral into a blog post. Don't ask any more questions, readers. Something to think about."

MJB again. Of course I have no idea how close to Steve's thoughts those were, but it's what best makes logic to me about the whole decision to ignore the potential of a chance to discuss death, and why Christians don't fear it.

I really, really can't fathom Steve's mode of thinking, and I suppose at the end of the day that's a good thing.

[MamaJunebug]

And the thing is, it really makes no sense at all – what better time to bear witness to the idea that faith in Jesus Christ will make a person unafraid of death, and confident of living eternally in peace and glory, than to say that "our grandfather has entered into eternal rest and life in Jesus Christ, because of his trust in Jesus' saving work ."

I really, really don't get this bunch. And again, I'm sure that's a good thing.

[HoneyBunny]

Several thoughts on this most magnificent find (thank you)!...

My husband was career military and I've been to a lot of funerals with military honors. They never fail to leave me in tears, regardless of the age of the deceased. I think it reminds me of what I'm likely to face if my own husband pre-deceases me. But achingly sad are funerals for young service members killed in duty, or suicides, and I've been to too many of those in the past 11 years. Words can't describe.

Gigi rocks, as I knew she would. She seems like a wonderful lady. Can't help wondering what her real feelings are about the S. Maxwell family.

As much as I loved viewing this find, WHY would anyone take photos of a funeral? Wow. If someone had had a camera in my face when my dad passed, I would not have been happy. But, like wakes (his was a 7 hour, family there the whole time ordeal) maybe it's a regional thing. I do know that, when my husband's dad died, his Virginia Southern Baptist funeral seemed foreign to me, as I'm certain my Dad's Midwest Catholic funeral did to my husband.

[thoughtful]

Thoughtful, I would say of the blog post – and I'm just telling it like I am guessing it here – they needed to post something because of, simply, the profit motive!

Got to keep yourself in front of your customers and public, after all. If too much time goes by without a blog post, they might forget about you, or go to the next thing.

From a practical standpoint, I can see why they wouldn't want to mention granddad's death in the typical blog. Here's my "trying to think like Steve Maxwell "reasoning:

"If we mention Rex's death, we will get a lot of sympathy responses, but it really won't sell many books and certainly won't book any conferences. Also, we will have to spend too much time writing, 'thank you.'

"Also, people will think it odd that we haven't shown any photos of the ceremony or service sending granddad off to heaven. (If indeed he went to heaven which is not altogether certain, since he wasn't me!)

"And photos of the ceremony show us looking sad, and vulnerable – especially my beloved dear darling wife Teri – and is that the image we want to give of a confident, happy, hard-working, Stevely family? I think not!!

"Besides which, Teri told me that under no circumstances am I to make her dad's funeral into a blog post. Don't ask any more questions, readers. Something to think about."

MJB again. Of course I have no idea how close to Steve's thoughts those were, but it's what best makes logic to me about the whole decision to ignore the potential of a chance to discuss death, and why Christians don't fear it.

I really, really can't fathom Steve's mode of thinking, and I suppose at the end of the day that's a good thing.

Yes, it is! You did a good job of trying to figure out what he might be thinking, but he is so far from logical and normal that it is not an easy task.

It also occurred to me that they didn't want to miss doing a Memorial Day post, since they have to connect it to abortion. Of course, that's even more ironic, since they were actually mourning someone who served his country that weekend!

And the thing is, it really makes no sense at all – what better time to bear witness to the idea that faith in Jesus Christ will make a person unafraid of death, and confident of living eternally in peace and glory, than to say that "our grandfather has entered into eternal rest and life in Jesus Christ, because of his trust in Jesus' saving work ."

That's basically what I said in my post on the other thread.

[Handmaiden of Dog]

Thoughtful, you gave a good summery of why this whole affair seems odd. I know certain FJers have said that it isn't odd, that everyone grieves in their own way, but it feels very strange to me. The only thing I can compare it to is a "sorta" friend calls you every few days to fill you in on the latest news about her family, how her husband bought a new set of golf clubs, how she lost 5 lbs, how her dog loves to go to the vet, yackity, yackity. Then you happen to find out her mother died but she never said a word and you start to wonder what other stuff she isn't telling you. Why is she only boring you with trivialities? Is something happening in her life that is so awful that she can't bring herself to talk about it?

It is weird to see the Maxwells without their fake smiles and poses. Makes you realize how fake their whole blog is.

[WonderingInWA]

I haven't read all the responses here, but wanted to chime in that I was glad to see the photos and I think the Maxwells appear to be experiencing genuine grief. I got teary looking at those photos. Grandad was ill for a long time (I think he had Parkinsons, am I right?) so his death wasn't a surprise and probably somewhat of a relief from a care perspective. And finally just knowing he was out of his own painful situation. They will be processing his passing for a long time. I was a little surprised they took all the young grandchildren to the service, but to each his own.

[SPHASH]

I wonder if Gigi really did get the hell out of Dodge and is moving in with Tami, which is the reason why they haven't mentioned Grandad's passing.

[thoughtful]

Thoughtful, you gave a good summery of why this whole affair seems odd. I know certain FJers have said that it isn't odd, that everyone grieves in their own way, but it feels very strange to me. The only thing I can compare it to is a "sorta" friend calls you every few days to fill you in on the latest news about her family, how her husband bought a new set of golf clubs, how she lost 5 lbs, how her dog loves to go to the vet, yackity, yackity. Then you happen to find out her mother died but she never said a word and you start to wonder what other stuff she isn't telling you. Why is she only boring you with trivialities? Is something happening in her life that is so awful that she can't bring herself to talk about it?

A good analogy. But even that would be less odd to me, and easier to explain away with "everybody grieves differently."

I would add two things to make it more like the feeling this gives me:

1. she is a person who is rather preachy, claims to be unafraid of the deeper issues of life, has advised others when they were grieving, and has these deep conversations even with strangers and not-so-close acquaintances.

2. she went out of her way to call you to tell you all of these trivialities, shortly after getting home from her mother's funeral.

[FloraDoraDolly]

I wonder if Gigi really did get the hell out of Dodge and is moving in with Tami, which is the reason why they haven't mentioned Grandad's passing.

If Gigi was her husband's primary caregiver throughout his illness, this indicates that she's in good health herself. If so, she may prefer to stay in her own home and community for as long as she can. There may be other relatives or longtime friends in the area. Hopefully, she has a support system other than the Maxwells. To be fair to them, I'm sure they're very good about helping her out with housework and various chores. But psychologically, Gigi doesn't need Steve talking gloom and doom or telling her not to go to lunch with her lady friends or yelling at her because she happened to be listening to the news when Sarah came over to clean the carpet. And, well, I like to think that the Maxwells wouldn't take advantage of Gigi when she's vulnerable so they can get their hands on her house. But if they are the sort who would sink that low, I hope Tami or someone else is there to look out for Gigi's interests.

[Koala]

Somebody hold my hand and pat me comfortingly for I will never get used to seeing ALL aspects of life/death now photographed :( Specifically in the picture where the woman is behind the family and snapping away with her compact. I'm just so old fashioned.

You are not alone...I don't think I'll ever get used to it.

[MamaJunebug]

That's basically what I said in my post on the other thread.

And thus it is said: great minds think alike. :wink-kitty:

You know, it's curious that none of the titus2 blog has ever addressed the real-life issues of seeing a beloved elder relative become frail. It would be so much more interesting than the predictable, plasticized staged ops they provide.

I'm not saying anyone should divulge more than they want to. In fact, so many divulge too much. I just wonder what Steve hopes to gain by the blog posts they do put up. Snark from us. Few comments from the faithful until there's a birth or something worthy, like the chicky family. But there's so rarely anything worthy. Well, IMHO anyway. It may be time for MJB to walk away from the Maxwells. Nothing more I write is gonna help them.

[WonderingInWA]

And thus it is said: great minds think alike. :wink-kitty:

You know, it's curious that none of the titus2 blog has ever addressed the real-life issues of seeing a beloved elder relative become frail. It would be so much more interesting than the predictable, plasticized staged ops they provide.

I'm not saying anyone should divulge more than they want to. In fact, so many divulge too much. I just wonder what Steve hopes to gain by the blog posts they do put up. Snark from us. Few comments from the faithful until there's a birth or something worthy, like the chicky family. But there's so rarely anything worthy. Well, IMHO anyway. It may be time for MJB to walk away from the Maxwells. Nothing more I write is gonna help them.

I think it would be enough is Stevie just addressed publicly his personal boundaries on sharing. All he has to say is "we guard life and the loss of it as something very personal to our family". Enough said. Even though he preaches to others about death and to be afraid of it unless they are saved, when death comes to a family member, honestly, I'm giving him a pass to talk about it or not. He might really be struggling with how to talk about it or maybe someone else in the family or several of them are. He's so good at the short and curt, he could just acknowledge it in a few words (one sentence, even) and move on to mourning, or whatever it is he's been doing.

[thoughtful]

You know, it's curious that none of the titus2 blog has ever addressed the real-life issues of seeing a beloved elder relative become frail. It would be so much more interesting than the predictable, plasticized staged ops they provide.

I'm not saying anyone should divulge more than they want to. In fact, so many divulge too much. I just wonder what Steve hopes to gain by the blog posts they do put up. Snark from us. Few comments from the faithful until there's a birth or something worthy, like the chicky family. But there's so rarely anything worthy.

To the bolded - yep, it is a bit of a mystery.

Since he has so many things (and people!) in his life rigidly compartmentalized, maybe Steve thinks of the blog as The Official Look How Happy We Are Outlet, and has said or implied to the family that only the books and Corners would address any deeper issues.

And/or maybe, because Sarah is generally the much-supervised blogger, he feels she cannot address such serious issues, since he perceives her as still a child.

I think it would be enough is Stevie just addressed publicly his personal boundaries on sharing. All he has to say is "we guard life and the loss of it as something very personal to our family". Enough said. Even though he preaches to others about death and to be afraid of it unless they are saved, when death comes to a family member, honestly, I'm giving him a pass to talk about it or not. He might really be struggling with how to talk about it or maybe someone else in the family or several of them are. He's so good at the short and curt, he could just acknowledge it in a few words (one sentence, even) and move on to mourning, or whatever it is he's been doing.

The bolded would be dignified, and something like that would be nice to see.

I'm actually giving him a pass on not posting about it, as well. As I said, it's the fact that there were posts about trivialities so soon after the two deaths that feels so odd, to me. Blog silence for a while might have worked better. Or letting Sarah express her feelings, if she was so inclined (yeah, right, like Steve would allow that).

edited for a riffle and clarity

[lilith]

If Gigi was her husband's primary caregiver throughout his illness, this indicates that she's in good health herself. If so, she may prefer to stay in her own home and community for as long as she can. There may be other relatives or longtime friends in the area. Hopefully, she has a support system other than the Maxwells. To be fair to them, I'm sure they're very good about helping her out with housework and various chores. But psychologically, Gigi doesn't need Steve talking gloom and doom or telling her not to go to lunch with her lady friends or yelling at her because she happened to be listening to the news when Sarah came over to clean the carpet. And, well, I like to think that the Maxwells wouldn't take advantage of Gigi when she's vulnerable so they can get their hands on her house. But if they are the sort who would sink that low, I hope Tami or someone else is there to look out for Gigi's interests.

Well John's going to want his turn at attempted courting soon. Homes within a block of Maxhell HQ don't come up every day. Something to think about.......