Ken Explains it All - Lori & Ken Alexander - Part 3

[formergothardite]

Ken's story is a good example of why sex before marriage might be a good idea, that way you are aware of these sorts of issues before marriage. If they were having sex before marriage and the men married the women knowing that they have issues surrounding sex and only want it once a month, they really shouldn't have started complaining when the women didn't magically change after the wedding.

[Sumeri]

Right. I don't comment all that often but Ken, you're giving me the creeps. Is your wife aware that you are involving yourself in this line of conversation with a forum's worth of women? Yech.

[SquirrelySquirrel]

I don't share a lot about my sex life, but I have to chime in that no, my husband has never asked for or expected a hand job when I wasn't in the mood for sex in the nearly 15 years we've been together. He has his own hand he can use if he's that desperate. He'd never enjoy anything like that if I wasn't in the mood, just as I wouldn't if he wasn't in the mood.

And seriously Ken, grow the fuck up. Hand job. Blow job. Just say what you mean. Two words are way less creepy than using a few sentences talking about lube and telling us to use our imaginations. :ew:

Right. I don't comment all that often but Ken, you're giving me the creeps. Is your wife aware that you are involving yourself in this line of conversation with a forum's worth of women? Yech.

Seriously. I would be pretty upset if my husband was posting about our sex life to a bunch of strange women anonymously. I can't even imagine how I'd feel knowing anyone could Google our names and read the kind of shit he's been posting.

Ken's story is a good example of why sex before marriage might be a good idea, that way you are aware of these sorts of issues before marriage. If they were having sex before marriage and the men married the women knowing that they have issues surrounding sex and only want it once a month, they really shouldn't have started complaining when the women didn't magically change after the wedding.

I was having the exact same thought. He highlights one of the many reasons I had no desire to be a virgin marrying a virgin and why living together beforehand was an absolute must.

[AllisonWndrland]

Ken wrote:

:lol: He'll take it upon himself to police FJ. How noble!

Well, Ken is a giver. 10 minutes per thread and we will know what needs to be changed. :twisted:

[ShesCrafty]

I was taking his lube comment to mean he expected vaginal sex from his wife but since she wouldn't be turned on, lube was needed. However, Ken has trouble expressing himself well with the written word, so maybe I misunderstood. At any rate, I know way too much about Ken and Lori Alexander's sex life :ew: . And I agree with everyone else, if my husband were talking this way about me on a public forum that anyone could find, he wouldn't need any KY. He'd need a divorce lawyer.

[Hisey]

Ken has told us that he doesn't allow Lori to read Free Jinger.

Yet he is allowed to read and post on FJ *and* to discuss sex with a bunch of women.

I wonder how Lori feels when he is typing away on a site she is not allowed to visit? Does she wonder? Does she cheat and peek on here? What would she think if she did?

[Koala]

Ken has told us that he doesn't allow Lori to read Free Jinger.

Yet he is allowed to read and post on FJ *and* to discuss sex with a bunch of women.

I wonder how Lori feels when he is typing away on a site she is not allowed to visit? Does she wonder? Does she cheat and peek on here? What would she think if she did?

Well, now we know why she isn't allowed to read here don't we ;)

And I totally think Lori spends a good majority of her day checking in with us.

[dairyfreelife]

Well, now we know why she isn't allowed to read here don't we ;)

And I totally think Lori spends a good majority of her day checking in with us.

Maybe she should get checked for those online relationship STDs.

[salex]

Maybe she should get checked for those online relationship STDs.

Or we should...

[ViolaSebastian]

Come to think of it, I might have a virus ;)

[Loveday]

Well, now we know why she isn't allowed to read here don't we ;)

And I totally think Lori spends a good majority of her day checking in with us.

This. I think she's visited this site many times, and I think she knows exactly what Ken is up to here.

[cindyluvs24]

Ken is having fun talking about sex with us heathen banshees under the guise of instructing us dontcha know. Ken dear, I'm happy if this is helping you but you are never going to have the last word here.

[feministxtian]

Ken has told us that he doesn't allow Lori to read Free Jinger.

Yet he is allowed to read and post on FJ *and* to discuss sex with a bunch of women.

I wonder how Lori feels when he is typing away on a site she is not allowed to visit? Does she wonder? Does she cheat and peek on here? What would she think if she did?

"allow"??? EXCUSE ME???? He decides what to ALLOW his wife to read or not read? Good grief...is she a grown woman with autonomy or an overgrown child that needs an overlord to control her?????

Ken...you ARE a grade A, PURE ASSHOLE! I'm telling ya, it's pencil dick syndrome...

[Jezebel]

I was taking his lube comment to mean he expected vaginal sex from his wife but since she wouldn't be turned on, lube was needed. However, Ken has trouble expressing himself well with the written word, so maybe I misunderstood.

This was my understanding, too. But no matter what he actually expects her to do, he's still using his wife as an object to masturbate with, and this is a reasonable part of her wifely duties. Vomit smiley, anyone?

I only had to read a few of his posts to reach the conclusion that he's a full-blown Narcissist. Subsequent reading has only reinforced that. It's all there: the complete lack of empathy or understanding of others' perspectives; the need to always dominate those he sees as beneath him (and he's likely a massive suck-up to anyone he perceives to be in a superior position); the prioritization of his needs above others; the grotesque sense of entitlement; the magical thinking; the arrogance; the expectation of special treatment.

And the hell of it is that he's utterly convinced he's a nice, godly guy and a wonderful, loving husband. This is the image he's decided upon for himself, so therefore it must be so, and anyone who points out otherwise is automatically dead wrong.

His style of argument is classic Narcissist. His stories keep changing in an attempt to find the one that works. When he doesn't want to answer a question he ignores it and protests how busy he is in a wall of text. He changes the subject, and pushes the conversation off on irrelevant tangents, rather than answer direct questions. He lies, then howls with indignation when his own words are quoted right back at him. He invents statistics on the spot to support his claims. He's used vague threats of legal action, then turned around and moaned about how he just wants to make friends.

Those who disagree are sick, deluded, bitter, ungodly, rebellious--or they're too stupid to understand him. We're supposed to know exactly what he meant, no matter how vague or sloppily-worded his posts are. His fuzzy thinking and clumsy writing is never the problem; failure to convey his message accurately is actually the readers' failure, never his. He's too busy and important to write his thoughts in a clear, precise manner, and we're irrational and demanding for expecting it. Holding him responsible for his own words is nitpicking. He pays lip-service to building bridges, creating undertanding, and making friends--then turns around and hurls insults and accusations. And through it all, he whines about being the persecuted, mischaracterized, maligned victim.

I grew up with a Narcissist; he happened to be my dad. And as I'm reading Ken's posts, it's the exact same self-serving, manipulative garbage. EXACT SAME. Only, to give my father credit, he knew better than to put anything in writing, where it could later be used against him. He bullied and manipulated people over the phone or in conversation, so there was never a permanent, publicly viewable record of his sickness available for me or anyone else to refer to and compare notes on, or offer as evidence to people who didn't believe me. Ken, unfortunately for him (but fortunately for the rest of us), isn't so smart.

At any rate, I know way too much about Ken and Lori Alexander's sex life :ew: . And I agree with everyone else, if my husband were talking this way about me on a public forum that anyone could find, he wouldn't need any KY. He'd need a divorce lawyer.

I'm not married, but if ever a man I was with spilled this much detail about our intimate life together online--or even if I found out he was telling tales to his buddies IRL--the relationship would immediately and irrevocably be over. I've ended relationships with absolutely brutal swiftness over non-negotiable transgressions before, and I'm okay with being alone, and that level of disrespect for the most private aspects of a relationship signals GAME OVER.

[ILoveJellybeans]

You know what else he could use the lube for if his wife wasn't in the mood?

Way more fun than doing it with someone who isn't interested.

[latraviata]

Ken is having fun talking about sex with us heathen banshees under the guise of instructing us dontcha know. Ken dear, I'm happy if this is helping you but you are never going to have the last word here.

Apparantly fundies are obsessed by sex. All that babbling about modesty, purity and what not, even for me from very secular Holland, the land of the godless perverts, they are so disturbingly candid about their personal sex life. A clear symptom of lust oppression, prohibitions and commandments, all ingredients to deprive people of a healthy sex life.

[ViolaSebastian]

Found this little 'gem' on Lori's blog: "I wonder if all the postpartum depression women are experiencing today is from not getting enough sleep."

[latraviata]

Found this little 'gem' on Lori's blog: "I wonder if all the postpartum depression women are experiencing today is from not getting enough sleep."

Well, if it was that simple, there wouldn't be any women with postpartum depression.

Get some sleep, there fixed it.

That stupid, stupid woman!

[ViolaSebastian]

Well, if it was that simple, there wouldn't be any women with postpartum depression.

Get some sleep, there fixed it.

That stupid, stupid woman!

Yep, all Andrea Yates needed was a good night's sleep.

[ViolaSebastian]

I also ran across a comment of Ken's on Lori's blog: "Unfortunately, just like global warming, drugs and gay studies, the ones conducting the studies or writing the articles begin with a bias and then see what they want in the data. "

Um...do you really not believe in climate change, Ken?

[2xx1xy1JD]

Well, the post-partum depression and lack of sleep connection is probably one of the less snarkable comments.

Lack of sleep IS correlated with PPD, although other risk factors are also associated with PPD and it is more than just sleep deprivation.

http://www.journalsleep.org/ViewAbstract.aspx?pid=27505

FWIW, I do take sleep deprivation seriously as a health concern. It can also be a factor in fibromyalgia, sleep deprivation can cause similar impairment to alcohol while driving, and poor sleep can even affect cancer rates.

[latraviata]

Well, the post-partum depression and lack of sleep connection is probably one of the less snarkable comments.

Lack of sleep IS correlated with PPD, although other risk factors are also associated with PPD and it is more than just sleep deprivation.

http://www.journalsleep.org/ViewAbstract.aspx?pid=27505

FWIW, I do take sleep deprivation seriously as a health concern. It can also be a factor in fibromyalgia, sleep deprivation can cause similar impairment to alcohol while driving, and poor sleep can even affect cancer rates.

Of course it is a factor, but sleeping pills only is not the solution.

Fibromyalgia, don't get my doctor son started on that one........

[ViolaSebastian]

Well, the post-partum depression and lack of sleep connection is probably one of the less snarkable comments.

Lack of sleep IS correlated with PPD, although other risk factors are also associated with PPD and it is more than just sleep deprivation.

http://www.journalsleep.org/ViewAbstract.aspx?pid=27505

FWIW, I do take sleep deprivation seriously as a health concern. It can also be a factor in fibromyalgia, sleep deprivation can cause similar impairment to alcohol while driving, and poor sleep can even affect cancer rates.

Oh, no, I absolutely agree with you, 2xx, just to be clear. I suffer from chronic back pain and I know that I have a harder time dealing with it when I'm on sleep deprived. I just find it snarkable that she thinks that PPD is caused by a lack of sleep alone, as opposed to other factors like hormones, neurotransmitters, etc.

[Coconut Flan]

It's the once again with the superficial and simple minded view of something.

[Full enough quiver]

I don't think lack of sleep causes PPD, but it can certainly make it worse. I didn't have PPD, but I'm a person who needs 10 hours of sleep a night. 8 hours is ok, Im functional, but maybe slightly sleepier and crankier. Less than 8, I have a raging headache, can't focus, and feellike crap. Less than 6, I will actually vomit, have double vision, ringing in the ears, and cannot function at all. Having a newborn sucked. Luckily, she was a good sleeper after about 3 months, because I don't know how I would have survived otherwise.