Pants made me vain

[JaChelle Sugar]

Personally I like a nice tush on a man. The front, not so much.

The front is interesting (and certainly has it's uses :P ) but there's nothing like a good view of a nice ass. :whistle:

[Koala]

On another post she answers a question that's been asked here many times: what happens if a fundy is unable to conceive?

http://cornerofjoy.blogspot.com/2012/04 ... ested.html

I guess they're not considering adoption.

As a woman who required mild fertility meds I wonder if this chic would apply these same principles to any other medical condition.

Also she is an idiot. No one gives a rats ass about her "notch". :roll: Get over yourself honey.

[Dee-Dee]

Why is it so wrong for her to want to abstain from being tested to avoid blame? I know it may sound a little out there, but I don't think it's that illogical. Even though one might not want to admit it aloud, I can see how a woman who has a deep desire to get pregnant and subsequently finds out she cannot have children because of her husband's fertility issues might have a hard time with that. Of course you still love your husband and care for them, but is it that stupid to say you might feel some resentment towards him in not being able to provide you with a biological baby?

[Koala]

Why is it so wrong for her to want to abstain from being tested to avoid blame? I know it may sound a little out there, but I don't think it's that illogical. Even though one might not want to admit it aloud, I can see how a woman who has a deep desire to get pregnant and subsequently finds out she cannot have children because of her husband's fertility issues might have a hard time with that. Of course you still love your husband and care for them, but is it that stupid to say you might feel some resentment towards him in not being able to provide you with a biological baby?

Maybe it's just me, but I wouldn't resent my husband for a medical condition he couldn't control and he certainly didn't resent me when we spent a couple of years thinking I would never be able to carry a baby to term. If you have to trick yourself in order to have a stable, loving marriage, then it's likely you don't have a stable loving marriage.

[slickcat79]

Why is it so wrong for her to want to abstain from being tested to avoid blame? I know it may sound a little out there, but I don't think it's that illogical. Even though one might not want to admit it aloud, I can see how a woman who has a deep desire to get pregnant and subsequently finds out she cannot have children because of her husband's fertility issues might have a hard time with that. Of course you still love your husband and care for them, but is it that stupid to say you might feel some resentment towards him in not being able to provide you with a biological baby?

Because very few people who go through fertility testing are told "Sorry, there's no hope, there's nothing we can do for you, you'll never have bio children." If the man has low motility, you can try IUI; if he has low sperm count, maybe IVF. The treatments might not work, but if they know what the problem is, they might be able to fix it. Plus, as someone mentioned upthread, it could be something really serious causing or contributing to the problems: cancer, PCOS, etc. It would be really stupid to end up dying, getting injured, or further damaging your fertility due to a treatable illness because you were afraid seeing a doctor might destroy your marriage.

Of course, if you have no intention of going through fertility treatments because you want to prove to god that you are surrendering to his control, maybe it's less important. But normal people usually don't think that way.

[Dee-Dee]

Because very few people who go through fertility testing are told "Sorry, there's no hope, there's nothing we can do for you, you'll never have bio children." If the man has low motility, you can try IUI; if he has low sperm count, maybe IVF. The treatments might not work, but if they know what the problem is, they might be able to fix it. Plus, as someone mentioned upthread, it could be something really serious causing or contributing to the problems: cancer, PCOS, etc. It would be really stupid to end up dying, getting injured, or further damaging your fertility due to a treatable illness because you were afraid seeing a doctor might destroy your marriage.

Of course, if you have no intention of going through fertility treatments because you want to prove to god that you are surrendering to his control, maybe it's less important. But normal people usually don't think that way.

I guess that is the point I was getting at. They have already decided that they don't want to use any type of medical advancements to have a biological child deciding not to get tested in the first place really doesn't seem like a big thing. The point isn't that it would never be possible for them to conceive, but that rather than choosing to use fertility treatments and medical advancements to alter how their bodies are working naturally. I think it can be a tricky question that arises in Christian circles - do you say that it is not God's plan that you naturally conceive and therefore are called to parent via adoption, or do you believe that God inspired man to discover medical advancements to help aid in situations of infertility?

And Koala, I guess I was thinking of it more in the situation that were I to be unable to conceive and was tested and it was revealed that my husband had a medical condition that was the cause of the infertility I would of course never love him less but I think it is reasonable to think that a woman (especially one who has a deep desire to have biological children and experience pregnancy) could be susceptible to feelings of frustration....and that this couple is simply choosing not to place themselves in a situation where those feelings might arise.

[julie paradox]

I like comic sans

[dawbs]

*snip*

And Koala, I guess I was thinking of it more in the situation that were I to be unable to conceive and was tested and it was revealed that my husband had a medical condition that was the cause of the infertility I would of course never love him less but I think it is reasonable to think that a woman (especially one who has a deep desire to have biological children and experience pregnancy) could be susceptible to feelings of frustration....and that this couple is simply choosing not to place themselves in a situation where those feelings might arise.

I'll admit (again) to being pretty biased on this subject, but I think preventing those feelings is a big red flag.

I'm not saying that those feelings won't arrive--trust me, my husband and I have been through the "baby maybe?" wringer--those feelings arose at different times. But it strikes me as disingenuous to say that you won't have those feelings if you don't KNOW the cause--when I was diagnosed as the problem first, I *still* rather held it against him because it had been his 'fault' we waited longer to try.

I do see people who are very cocky in the 'our marriage can survive anything' way, but this seems like the opposite extreme--like their marriage is a house of cards, just waiting to fall at the first disagreement about kids. (and that's a scary thing. Because whose to say that a quiverful husband/wife won't become pro-BC at some point? or won't want to limit? or won't have some other change of heart? [ I went through the "I want a kid NOW/I changed my mind and dono't ever want one" relationship pre-current kid". If Fertility was a possible pool of resentment we couldn't overcome, imagine how much worse that one is] It just strikes me as a way of forcing one's spouse to adhere to the rigid rules/tiny box--which people can choose to do, no problem, but that makes changing one's mind [aka, growing and changing--which is human and wise!] more traumatic and IMO, makes a marriage that much less likely to survive.

And there's also the fact that there's a huge gulf between testing and IVF. I wasn't really OK w/ IVF for me [Hell, i even said "eh, not ready, need to think" when offered clomid].....but 'easier' things (like removing growths that were putting pressure on my ovaries :), I was OK w/. Without a diagnosis, you don't know, really, what you're turning down.