"Components of Satan's spiritual structure"

[sippin0nsunshine]

Found this on tumblr and immediately thought of our lovely Maxwells.

[doggie]

well there goes the fun in the world.

[Conuly]

Lycanthropy? Is it even POSSIBLE to partake in that? Illuminati groups? I didn't know the were recruiting!

Interesting how they specifically call out Twilight *films* but not the *books*. That's the one thing I can agree with, and they still get it wrong!

Also, I note the vegetarianism is on the list, but cannibalism totally isn't. Hm....

[Cran]

Makes me think of Jack Chick. But the Maxwells&Co. probably get some ideas from him, so it is all the same.

But CONSUMING marihuana and pot seems to be ok, just don't go to these evil parties! There's a silver lining in everything.

Perhaps I can levitate when I consume enough pot...?

[pimpom]

Uhm, wasn't Daniel in the Lion's den (one of the few biblical stories I liked as a child) a vegetarian....?

Then again, I might have been misled by satan.

[slh12280]

Oh no...I am a vegetarian! I am doomed!!!!

[treemom]

Lycanthropy? Is it even POSSIBLE to partake in that? Illuminati groups? I didn't know the were recruiting!

Interesting how they specifically call out Twilight *films* but not the *books*. That's the one thing I can agree with, and they still get it wrong!

Also, I note the vegetarianism is on the list, but cannibalism totally isn't. Hm....

Emphasis mine. That is totally what i was thinking.

[contrary]

I have seen this thread title in "new posts" at least a dozen times now, and every single time, i read it, "SARAH's spiritual structure".

[argypargy]

Well it's good to know that only marihuana, LSD and shrooms are components of Satan's spiritual scripture.

Bring on the cocaine, meth and heroin!

[Terrie]

Well, yes, I would think that the Church of Satan is probably part of Satan's spiritual scripture. Do they think their fellow believers are that stupid?

[linnea27]

Some of those I'll give them. Church of Satan? Sure. Vampirism? Why not.

But yoga, meditation, and vegetarianism? As a vegetarian, I have to say, I have never heard "Satan's" voice in my ear when I reach for the spinach instead of the beef. Tricky guy, that Satan.

ETA: The scripture referenced iin the picture is:

When you enter the land the Lord your God is giving you, do not learn to imitate the detestable ways of the nations there. 10 Let no one be found among you who sacrifices their son or daughter in the fire, who practices divination or sorcery, interprets omens, engages in witchcraft, 11 or casts spells, or who is a medium or spiritist or who consults the dead. 12 Anyone who does these things is detestable to the Lord; because of these same detestable practices the Lord your God will drive out those nations before you.

and

For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.

Neither says anything about vegetarianism, meditation, yoga, metal music, or half of the other things mentioned.

[MarsGirl]

I'm definitely on the highway to hell (*snicker*) since I am a huge fan of rock music. I'm not a vegetarian, but I know lots of them... And I eat mostly organic. Is that part of Satan's manifesto as well? They left off veganism. I guess that one's okay.

Yoga?!

It's funny, though. Cuz I've known some fundies who are weary of yoga and meditation. Also, I had a Jewish friend who said that she takes yoga at her Jewish center where all the "eastern mysticism" is removed so that it is "safe."

I think that's the first time I realized it could be a problem for some people.

I guess fundies dont believe in relaxation or good health. Jesus never told us specifically to take care of the earth or our bodies.

[AtroposHeart]

Let's see what I am guilty of

Eastern Religions

Yoga

Astrology

Tarot Cards

Earth Worship

Wicca

Cyberpunk Culture

Diviniation

Vegetarianism

Post modernism(In literature)

Video Games

Harry Potter

Halloween

Rock Music

Yes, I have earned a first grade ticket to hell!

[tankgirl]

Lycanthropy? Is it even POSSIBLE to partake in that? Illuminati groups? I didn't know the were recruiting!

Interesting how they specifically call out Twilight *films* but not the *books*. That's the one thing I can agree with, and they still get it wrong!

Also, I note the vegetarianism is on the list, but cannibalism totally isn't. Hm....

Yeah, I was wondering how one dabbles in Lycantropy.

Also looks like trips to IKEA are out, that furniture might be a gate way to Satans love for PostModern design aesthetic.

[Terrie]

Also, necromancy. How many people are actually out there trying to raise the dead? The only ones I can think of are that fundie family who prayed over their miscarried fetus to bring it back to life.

[heinz57]

Isn't this list a bit counterproductive? I'll admit to not even knowing some of these terms :oops: and I actually went to google them! So instead of leaving me blissfully unaware of all that Satan's got to offer, it stirred my curiosity.

As in "Oh, never heard of lycanthropy, sounds like fun! I'll try it on occasion".

[kunoichi66]

Also, necromancy. How many people are actually out there trying to raise the dead? The only ones I can think of are that fundie family who prayed over their miscarried fetus to bring it back to life.

Wait, what?

[jenny_islander]

OK, putting aside the goofy cluelessness of the list, let's dig into the verses.

Ephesians 6:12 comes after Paul's recommendations for how Christians should live in their existing communities (containing directions for wives and husbands, parents and children, slaves and masters). It begins a passage about how Paul thinks individual Christians should live. Here's the verse, in the KJV even, so it isn't one of them godless commie new translations: For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high [places]. So what follows this dramatic verse? A list of things to run away from, right? Nope. It's part of Paul's extended metaphor about the armor of Christ. He recommends "truth," "righteousness," "the preparation of the gospel of peace," "faith," "salvation," "the word of God," and "praying always" for oneself, "the saints," and for Paul himself, because he was still going on missionary journeys when he wrote this letter. I note that whoever bought the ad falls down right at the first step. But then this is a tribal recognition ritual, not actually an attempt to speak to people outside the group. Truth doesn't matter. Just the cozy feeling of being inside the little circle that knows what's really going on while They gnash their teeth in the outer darkness.

Deuteronomy 18:9-12 is extracted from one of the discourses of Moses to the Israelites shortly before they entered the Promised Land. It comes after the directions for how the Levites are to be supported by the people and before the directions for cities of refuge. Here are the verses cited, in the KJV: When thou art come into the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee, thou shalt not learn to do after the abominations of those nations. There shall not be found among you [any one] that maketh his son or his daughter to pass through the fire, [or] that useth divination, [or] an observer of times, or an enchanter, or a witch, or a charmer, or a consulter with familiar spirits, or a wizard, or a necromancer. For all that do these things [are] an abomination unto the LORD: and because of these abominations the LORD thy God doth drive them out from before thee. Here are the next two verses: Thou shalt be perfect with the LORD thy God. For these nations, which thou shalt possess, hearkened unto observers of times, and unto diviners: but as for thee, the LORD thy God hath not suffered thee so [to do]. So the whole passage refers to avoiding the magical/religious rituals of non-Jews. How to get from this to calling vegetarianism, LOTR, and the Twilight movies (but not the books?) "components of Satan's spiritual structure" is an exercise left for the reader.

The passage doesn't end there, by the way. The need for a window into the future is taken for granted; it's just the method of fulfilling it that is condemned. Moses goes on to note that the people begged God not to speak to them directly ever again, as He did at Mount Horeb, or they might die. So instead of speaking to them directly, says Moses, God plans to send prophets. Here's Moses quoting what God told him (v.18): And it shall come to pass, [that] whosoever will not hearken unto my words which he shall speak in my name, I will require [it] of him. The prophets said a hell of a lot about not grinding down the poor and powerless. Why don't the people who take out ads like this ever preach against the evils of payday loans, robo-signed mortgages, or raising sales tax on groceries? It's always, "We don't do it in our group, so it must be EEEEVILLLL." Even when their aimless screeds catch a genuine evil, like Scientology, they can't be trusted, because they are simultaneously flipping out about meditation, a practice that is recommended in the Bible they claim to have read!

[Conuly]

As in "Oh, never heard of lycanthropy, sounds like fun! I'll try it on occasion".

If you find a way, by all means, let us know! (And remind me to keep my supply of silver bullets fully stocked. I don't have a gun license, will a silver knife do as well, do you think?)

[tankgirl]

How did I miss necromancy?? That is awesome!

[sassycupcake]

Found this on tumblr and immediately thought of our lovely Maxwells.

I'm about 75% sure you got that from my Tumblr. At least, someone with your username reblobbed it from me...

ETA: And I still don't know what "remote viewing" is.

[Cran]

Perhaps it is some kind of "out of body experience"?

[heinz57]

If you find a way, by all means, let us know! (And remind me to keep my supply of silver bullets fully stocked. I don't have a gun license, will a silver knife do as well, do you think?)

I might get frightfully close to it if I stop epilating... :roll:

Edited to add that in that case a silver razor would probably be the most appropriate.

[Conuly]

ETA: And I still don't know what "remote viewing" is.

That's when you see things happening in places distant from you, as they happen. Like on TV, but without the TV.

Again, I ask, how does one "dabble" in things that don't happen? But at least some people might genuinely believe they do this, or that they can cheat others out of money by pretending they do.

[jockosmom]

Damn! I was gonna try me some lycanthropy followed by a little fire walking. I just can't have any fun anymore!!1!11!