Not getting enough sex? Let Lori and the holy spirit

[wtfrenchtoast]

Wow...does Lori post on Christian Forums? There's a hot debate about this very subject going on there now. But honestly, who would even want to have sex with a partner who wasn't into it? That would just make me feel like a horrible person.

[linnea27]

She wrote a piece a while back about god giving men sex drives so that women can provide a service for men in return for the men providing for the women, and that's why women should always wait until marriage- don't give the milk away for free and all that. I wrote a very polite and carefully-worded response, encouraging her to consider that we need to raise our children to think of women and wives as more than just "milk" and that a healthy marriage isn't based on "buying the cow." She didn't publish it.

Her husband must have it so beat into her that she is nothing more than a warm spooge receptacle and that if she doesn't put out he won't "provide" for her any longer that she can't even consider any other purpose for women. Which ties into her latest article- when you look at the overarching themes of her sex articles, her attitude seems to be that if a woman doesn't put out, her husband shouldn't have to feed her that day.

[Deleted07]

WTF is it with these people and sex, I swear its just unbelievable how they view it!

For Crying out loud, even if I were married to a hot sex machine who knew what he was doing, I sure as heck wouldn't want it everyday and at the exact times when he wanted it!

How anyone can think a woman doesn't have the right to say NO! is beyond me... I bet you she the type that would think rape in marriage is OK. :evil: :| :doh: :x :x :x :x

[snarkbillie]

WTF is it with these people and sex, I swear its just unbelievable how they view it!

For Crying out loud, even if I were married to a hot sex machine who knew what he was doing, I sure as heck wouldn't want it everyday and at the exact times when he wanted it!

How anyone can think a woman doesn't have the right to say NO! is beyond me... I bet you she the type that would think rape in marriage is OK. :evil: :| :doh: :x :x :x :x

Silly person, marriage IS consent to these people. If you didn't want to give up all autonomy and bodily control you shouldn't have entered a marriage contract. :naughty:

[desertvixen]

I assume Ken is her husband? His blather is below.

Marriage is a contractual obligation to meet each other’s' needs in good times and in bad. This includes sexual needs which men almost always assume will be freely and often given, only to discover that sex seems to have a myriad of feminine conditions.

Well, I would point out three things - one, if sex is THAT important (and I agree, good sex is important), then this is something that partners should discuss before getting married - two, we all know what happens when someone assumes things - three, maybe this would be a good reason to have premarital sex. How are these people supposed to know anything about their sex drive when they never use it? Even if there is masturbation going on, that is not sex with a partner, and there are big differences. Masturbation is important and valuable, but it's not an adequate substitute.

This is not a one sided issue, and men need to be understanding with their timing and perhaps frequency, but if a wife will see sex not as some romantic notion but a true need for most men, they can easy satisfy them in a creative and timely manner and in return gain the blessings of their man and God.

See what I said about masturbation. Sexual release is a need, but sometimes our partners are just not in the mood. I have news for this guy - I think sex is a need for women too.

Finding common ground should be the goal with both spouses seeking to please the other, but recognize that for most men, sex is as big a perceived need as anything else that can be done in the relationship together. For most men, sex to create intimacy is as inextricably linked as a woman’s perceived need for intimacy to want or enjoy sex.

Doesn't this line ever get tired? And who else thinks that maybe these women would be more in the mood for sex if they weren't being continually told that women aren't as sexual as men?

[lilwriter85]

That whole posting was annoying for different reasons. It shows that Lori doesn't give shit about women's rights and Ken's comments pissed me off.

A bit OT but this line from the blog irked me.

Most people do not like being told what to do. This is why most people don't want to believe in God.

No, Lori some people don't want to believe in God, because for them there is a lack of proof of a God. As an atheist, I've many believer friends and relatives and none of them would ever say anything like that.

[Kitty]

I've been reading this thread and wanting to say things from my own limited, non-marital experience, but I can't without dropping a C-bomb which I know will offend some FJers. I don't want to offend FJers because I know why that word isn't looked upon very kindly here, but it's the worst word I can think of right now. God I'm so pissed off. I've dealt with this "sex is a NEED for guys" mindset for too fucking long, I don't want to go into details here but tl;dr FUCK YOU, LORI, AND YOUR HUSBAND, FUCK YOU BOTH AND EVERYONE WHO LOOKS LIKE YOU!

[snarkbillie]

If a guy "needs" sex so bad, then maybe he "needs" to acquaint himself with his hand. Just sayin'.

[lawfulevil]

If a guy "needs" sex so bad, then maybe he "needs" to acquaint himself with his hand. Just sayin'.

He could always fuck the horse Lori rode in on.

[Koala]

Ken is still going:

for those wives who desire to please God, they should consider how forcefully the apostle Paul argues for regular sex in a marriage:

And yes, it is a touchy issue for which Lori should be commended for her wiliness to tackle it.

[Koala]

He could always fuck the horse Lori rode in on.

Please stop. I just choked on my soda. :lol:

[Witsec7]

He could always fuck the horse Lori rode in on.

I think I peed a drop. :lol: :lol:

[Loveday]

He could always fuck the horse Lori rode in on.

This woman. I can't even. :doh:

[lilwriter85]

Ken is still going:

I wish I could punch Ken for saying that stuff.

I missed the part about Lori saying something about sexual abuse and then deleting it. Can someone recap for me?

[Deleted07]

Marriage is a contractual obligation to meet each other’s' needs in good times and in bad. This includes sexual needs which men almost always assume will be freely and often given, only to discover that sex seems to have a myriad of feminine conditions.

:o :shock: :? :x

What the actual fuck!?!?!

:evil: :evil: :evil:

[desertvixen]

I would say that Ken and Lori sooo deserve each other.

Like Ken says -- it is a NEED for men, and what a (relatively) easy need to satisfy! It is such an important way to show our husbands love. I think a lot of women don't understand/appreciate what sex means to men, and even look down on them for it. But we're called to serve each other.

The above is from another commenter. We get it, sex is a need. If men need it so badly, then they should understand that meeting their partner's needs would lead to more of their needs getting met. Instead of just assuming that women are withholding sex to be bitchy, why not look at the reasons?

Maybe she doesn't want to have sex because homeschooling, kid-watching, cooking, cleaning and all related tasks have tapped her out.

Maybe she's tired from pregnancy after pregnancy.

Maybe she is self-conscious about the effects of pregnancy and childbirth on her body.

Maybe it's painful because you're a bad lay. (Okay, low blow)

Maybe motherhood and hormones are not getting along.

The last one was me for a pretty long period after my daughter was born, made worse I think by the fact that when my ex and I first tried to have sex ten weeks after her birth, it was very much not fun. And we KNEW what pleased each other sexually, knew that we needed to use artificial lube because I was nursing - and it was still miserable. After that, I WANTED to enjoy sex, but I just was not able to get turned on and enjoy it - not even when it was just me and my five best friends.

I do think that men in general do not understand that if women can't get in the right frame of mind, we can't enjoy sex. Even my current partner sometimes doesn't get it - but then I notice that a lot of men see sex as stress relief, whereas more women (including myself) cannot relax and enjoy sex if they're too stressed.

[Lillybee]

In my Catholic high school marriage class, we were told that it was a mortal sin to refuse one's husband. Most of us put it where we put the lesson not to wear patent leather shoes because they would reflect our underwear. We laughed about it.,

[Want More Babies]

Lori is such an interesting piece of work.

Just last week the poor little thing couldn't go to a wedding because her neck hurt. I wonder when she is going through all her little "dramas" if she EVER tells her husband she doesn't feel like it? If I was a guy, living with her, I would be impotent. Her shrewness (is that even a word? :lol: ) would turn me off completely.

Her posts show more and more how much she really HATES women. I don't know if she can get any worse.

[lilwriter85]

Lori is such an interesting piece of work.

Just last week the poor little thing couldn't go to a wedding because her neck hurt. I wonder when she is going through all her little "dramas" if she EVER tells her husband she doesn't feel like it? If I was a guy, living with her, I would be impotent. Her shrewness (is that even a word? :lol: ) would turn me off completely.

Her posts show more and more how much she really HATES women. I don't know if she can get any worse.

I can see Lori fulfilling her husband's needs despite having physical pain. I guess if Lori ends up in a neck or brace, we will know why. I read about her neck pain last week and I hate to say it, but I do wonder if she exaggerates certain things.

[velly]

This post made me puke in my mouth a little... GODS WHY DOES THIS WOMAN MAKES ME PUKE IN MY MOUTH SO OFTEN!?

[Witsec7]

I can see Lori fulfilling her husband's needs despite having physical pain. I guess if Lori ends up in a neck or brace, we will know why. I read about her neck pain last week and I hate to say it, but I do wonder if she exaggerates certain things.

I suspect she hurt her neck bobbing for man apples.

[doggie]

This post made me puke in my mouth a little... GODS WHY DOES THIS WOMAN MAKES ME PUKE IN MY MOUTH SO OFTEN!?

She makes me puke a little bit from the other end.

[Want More Babies]

I suspect she hurt her neck bobbing for man apples.

:clap: No wonder Ken is posting on her blog. He is feeling quite the stud. I wonder if they have a BDSM marriage? Maybe that will come out in her next post.

[mockingbird]

I suspect she hurt her neck bobbing for man apples.

That was my first thought... Also, why do I ever go on FJ when I am trying to eat or drink?

Honestly the only other thing I know about this woman is that she sleeps naked with her husband. I was going to say fuck you Lori but I think she needs to exercise her right NOT to be fucked.

[Hisey]

I can see Lori fulfilling her husband's needs despite having physical pain. I guess if Lori ends up in a neck or brace, we will know why. I read about her neck pain last week and I hate to say it, but I do wonder if she exaggerates certain things.

You *wonder* if she exagerates? Oh, please. Her "neck pain" is the only thing she can control in her life. As she's said, if her husband says to clean the bathroom, she must clean the bathroom. Immediately. (And that's what you should be doing, too, you know).

Have you noticed that her neck always seems to act up during a major family event, like a graduation or a close friend's wedding or a party she is throwing for her daughter? Those are times that can cause stress to a family, and I'm sure Ken acts like an even bigger jerk, and she is so busy submitting right and left that --voila! -- her neck pain acts up.

Remember when Lori took that "agonizing" car ride to San Fran, where they stopped every half hour to buy frozen peas for her neck, and she still couldn't make it to her son's graduation? Well, in that same post is a picture of her having fun with her friends at the same graduation. And in the same post, she points out how lovely the hotel was. My feeling was, she just turned on her neck pain for the day of graduation, because it was so fraught with stress/anger/resentment/confusion that she needed to opt out.