Duggar Trial Respite Thread

[catlady]

What I did for self care:  I got my booster today.  Now my household, my parents, SIL, and sister have had all three shots.  Sister’s kids are vaxed but haven’t hit 6 months yet.

[Bassett Lady]

7 hours ago, JillRodsEyeliner said:

Is it true they love to stink? My aunt had one and she loved to stink.

Basset hounds have a special naturally occurring  odor. They smell a bit like a bag of corn chips mixed with day old socks. 
 

They are prone to infections in their ears and can get infections in their skin folds, but when  properly groomed it is not a problem. 
 

They will roll around in stinky items they find but I think that is pretty common in all dogs. 
 

My bassets get a weekly bath and daily ear cleaning plus tooth brushing. I find their scent, under those circumstances, mild and certainly tolerable. 
 

[catlady]

8 minutes ago, Bassett Lady said:

They will roll around in stinky items they find but I think that is pretty common in all dogs. 
 

Yep.  My dog is a Labrador and he will not roll in something unless it stinks:  

Before our town had totes, i walked him on a trash-day.  Critters had gotten into a poorly-contained bag and scattered some now-rotten meat.  Dog rolled in that one spot.  I had to avoid that yard for nearly a month because he kept trying to find it.

My neighbor had a portable pool (the kind with the inflatable ring around the top edge).  The one year when they took it down, the grass under it had started to compost, and that was where Dog decided to roll. 

[AnywhereButHere]

My husband's old boss had a Springer Spaniel. It was always in the office, and husband used to complain about how bad this dog smelled. I thought he must be exaggerating until I came to visit one day and encountered the dog. Damn! That dog STANK! Natural odor plus whatever it rolled around in on the daily (spaniels are naturally odoriferous I think, and this one did not get frequent baths). It was super friendly too and loved pets, and I was not about to refuse pets to a friendly dog, so by the time I headed out, I stank and had to drive home with the windows open. 😂

[feministxtian]

Sadie doesn't have any dog stank. She normally smells pretty good, even after getting wet. Don't know why, can't name a specific breed because she's a mutt. The only odiferous things about her are the poopies she lays in the yard and the occasional fart. 

[Father Son Holy Goat]

My self care today is following my meal plan. I’m struggling with the ED voice today so it’s hard. 
 

Breakfast and morning snack down!

 

[Bassett Lady]

Self Care Today: 

1. Making the dog wear jingle bell festooned antlers.

2. Taking pictures of the slightly embarrassed dog. 
 

 

[fluffernutter]

I am watching christmas movies and making a nice home-cooked meal. 

[feministxtian]

Today's self care will be my bible study group tonight. I'm surprised we haven't been asked to leave the coffee shop yet. We like to laugh, and someone in the group gets right loud occasionally. Tonight is the last night for this group and I'm a little sad. 

[Father Son Holy Goat]

I went to my eating disorder group and my sexual abuse group. Now I’m journaling 

[Seahorse Wrangler]

Since we are again approaching Christmas, I am being regaled by those who have a widowed/divorced male parental unit. These units require some-one to connect with . They are often older than me(57) but can be younger. I am apparently in need of a new headship for reasons not explained.

1) I am frequently required to sell my house. The proceeds will be spent in upgrading my New Headships abode.

2) I will gain knowledge of New Headship's family, without prompting. Cards, gifts I will send in New Headship's name.

3) I will prepare New Headship's favourite meals to his exact specifications without recourse to family recipes.

4) I will clean the house and take care of New Headship's belongings to his standard.

 

And what do I get out of this???

Nothing, nada, zilch.

And people wonder why I don't want to sell my children's inheritance for a life of pandering to another person when I can live my best life and some-one else's daughters and daughter-in-laws refuse to kick his ass to the curb. 

[feministxtian]

@Seahorse Wrangler I'm right there with you. I am so not up for kissing another guy's ass just to get my basic needs met. Fortunately, in my particular religious community, there's no pressure for "headship" or any of that other bullshit. Well, the only "headship" stuff is that IF I meet someone, my sons and pastor want to "interview" him. That's cool with me though, I mean, you never know what red flags you might have missed. 

I'm not even sure I want another relationship. I mean, it'd be nice, but I don't think I have the energy to start a new relationship. 

Weird shit you think about when you're supposed to be studying for finals....

[Bluebirdbluebell]

My grandmothers were both widowed a long time. While I wouldn't have cared if they had remarried, they didn't. It's weird to me that people would be pushed to remarry.

Edited December 8, 2021 by Bluebirdbluebell

[feministxtian]

10 minutes ago, Bluebirdbluebell said:

My grandmothers were both widowed a long time. While I wouldn't have cared if they had remarried, they didn't. It's to me that people would be pushed to remarry.

In some of the more patriarchal communities, a woman without a "headship" is excluded from most activities because she might give the other women ideas. She may be expected to be set up with a man with the intention of him being her "headship" and that whole umbrella of protection bullshit. When she remarries, she's accepted back into the women's circle. 

My grandmother died of a broken heart 4 years after my grandfather died. They were the loves of each other's lives. On the other side, my grandmother died first and my grandfather lived another 10 years or so. Y'all know the story of the mother. 

Me? I seriously doubt there's another man on this planet who would even want to "get to know me". I'm a hard-headed, independent as hell bitch. According to David, those were my GOOD qualities. 

[Hane]

Eh—20+ years out from my second divorce, I take great comfort in 100% control of the thermostat and household finances. If I need maintenance and repairs, I pay a guy. I will never, ever have to hear someone say “What do you have planned for dinner?” ever again.  Since my knee replacement surgery two months ago, I’ve been having a local housecleaning team in every other week and it’s been life changing—it forces me to keep everything picked up and organized, and I no longer have to panic whenever someone comes by. (I’m pretty sure I have a moderate case of executive function disorder.)

Today I realized that I have some blueberries that need to be used up and a ziplock bag of leftover T-Day pie dough, so a galette is in the oven. Later I’m going out to buy holiday donations for the food bank and toy drive.

[Bassett Lady]

I am making a comfort lunch of lentils and a glass of wine. 
 

I am then planning on snuggling up with one of the bassets and watching an episode of Castle on Hulu. 

[QuiverFullofBooks]

As a younger woman, I asked a divorced woman in her 50s why she didn’t date. She said, “At my age, it’s just babysitting penises.”

[smittykins]

Almost 17 years into widowhood, the only headships I’ve had(and plan to have)are feline.

[Marmee]

 My daughter's dog, Ava.  Lives in Alaska; she's recovering from a leg injury that she got when she escaped from the yard.   DD says Ava has cabin fever!  Right now they have about 3 hours of twilight during the day

[EyesOpen]

I don’t know why but that statement from Michelle and Jim bob set me off… im so happy the jury upheld justice for what was on trial today… but there have been lives ruined and so many failures along the way and Jim bob and Michelle and hurt so many people and children in so many ways… I’m going to go back and love all your pet posts and then I believe I’ll go hug my children and pet my brainless floof and call it a night online.

Edited December 10, 2021 by EyesOpen
Spelling is cool

[onekidanddone]

Self care decision today: Start the search for a (or two) feline fur babies. 

[Howl]

On 12/7/2021 at 11:44 PM, Bluebirdbluebell said:

My grandmothers were both widowed a long time. While I wouldn't have cared if they had remarried, they didn't. It's weird to me that people would be pushed to remarry.

I had a co-worker who laughed and said she'd never remarry if her DH died because she "didn't want to raise another husband."  

[Howl]

On 12/8/2021 at 11:24 AM, Bassett Lady said:

I am making a comfort lunch of lentils and a glass of wine. 

Lentils are HIGHLY underrated!  A few years ago my stepson and his husband got me the Thug Kitchen 101 Cookbook for Christmas and it has a fantastic Not Terrible Lentil Soup recipe for red lentils.  Paprika, ginger, turmeric, cumin, salt and garlic are all in there, with carrots, some kale, a little tomato paste, vegetable broth and quinoa.

Here in central Texas we're looking at a 50 degree temperature drop (high of 83 today, low of 35 on Saturday night) as a Blue Norther rolls in over the weekend, so it's time for a big pot of Not Terrible Lentil Soup! 

[Hane]

On 12/8/2021 at 1:15 PM, QuiverFullofBooks said:

As a younger woman, I asked a divorced woman in her 50s why she didn’t date. She said, “At my age, it’s just babysitting penises.”

When I was younger (and still thought I was happily married), I asked a couple of 50-something friends why they didn’t accept their boyfriends’ marriage proposals. One said, “If I want to go home from work on a Friday, put on sweats, make popcorn for dinner, and watch movies, I can.” My aunt said of widowhood in her 50s, “If I want to spend the afternoon in my hot tub with a trashy novel, I can. If I decide spur of the moment to take the grandkids to the library and ice cream parlor, I can. It ain’t all bad.”

At the time, I couldn’t fathom this—then I was in my 50s and single and love having what a fellow divorced person calls “100% of the vote.” It’s still the same as I turned 69 recently.

A friend my age had been dating a guy for a couple of years. She noticed that their relationship had devolved into his vedging on the couch watching football while she cooked dinner and cleaned up. She took a look at the situation and noped TF out of it with considerable relief.

Edited December 10, 2021 by Hane

[Howl]

 You know who is getting a respite?  Mrs. Reber.