Roy Moore is a *fucking child molesting loser*

[neurogirl]

THANK YOU African American and Hispanic voters of Alabama, and the white people/everyone who voted for Jones, but WHY WEREN'T THERE MORE? (rhetorical) Decency won...but far too many white people still said "eh...pedophilic pro-fetus > democrat"

Still...this is a victory! YAY JONES. YAY ALABAMA. In his acceptance speech he looked totally shocked too, like most of us were. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_LXjOCnp5qw

(He also says "folks" a lot, which reminds me of a certain someone!)

[JMarie]

Jones is up by 1.5%, too high to trigger a recount.  

Kurt Schlichter (some columnist guy) made up a chart, calling it "Kurt's Losers".  The losers are Steve Bannon / babies, taxpayers, Americans who respect the Second Amendment / Alabamians.  He didn't mention any winners.

[Cartmann99]

I'm tempted to stay up so I can see the reaction from our European friends and @formergothardite when they find out that Moore lost. 

[AlwaysExcited]

Dear Americans,

Spoiler

I almost screamed when I read the news. Can't wait to see Trump's reaction. 

[hoipolloi]

ETA: Twitter smackdowns are extra-special when they involve fucking assholes like Franklin Graham AND Roy Moore.

[Rachel333]

 

[AmazonGrace]

http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/opinion/huppke/ct-met-doug-jones-alabama-trump-moore-huppke-20171212-story.html

Rex Huppke

While all the squishy liberals out there in George-Soros-funded swaths of godless America were celebrating Democrat Doug Jones’ victory in Alabama’s Senate race, I’m guessing President Donald Trump was smiling, knowing he had again proven himself the ultimate deal maker.

Granted, Trump had offered his full-throated endorsement of Jones’ Republican opponent, Roy Moore, an accused child molester who rode a horse to his polling station Tuesday and doesn’t think Muslims should be allowed to serve in Congress.

And, yes, Moore’s loss in a deep-red state was a political thunderclap that echoed across the country and put a Democrat in an Alabama Senate seat for the first time in more than three decades.

And, technically speaking, each of the last three candidates Trump has backed in statewide races (Ed Gillespie in the Virginia gubernatorial race, Luther Strange in the primary against Moore, and now Moore in this race) have lost.

Your classic antifa lib hippie freak — aka, supporter of a moderate Democrat like Jones — will look at those facts and say: “Whoa, dude, Trump is losing so bad right now, he’s toxic. So much for making America great again, right?”

To which I say: “CRAM IT, HIPPIE!”

Spoiler

 

The president knows EXACTLY what he’s doing. While you guys are doing dope and playing checkers on your eco-friendly hemp checkerboards, Donald J. Trump is playing 5-dimensional chess ON YOUR FACES!

I know this because if there’s one thing this amazing and highly beloved president has taught us it’s that he’s never wrong, and if you suggest he is, you’re very stupid and probably unattractive.

To figure out how endorsing a candidate who was reportedly banned from a shopping mall for incessantly hitting on teen girls was the smart play, you need only look to Trump’s brilliant and deeply revered book, “The Art of the Deal.” And then tell me what is says in the chapter that I assume is called, “Backing the Abhorrent: Your First Step to Success.”

(I own 37 copies of the book but I haven’t read it. At Trump University, I learned knowledge is transferred as soon as you pay for something. Reading is unnecessary and low-class.)

What I can say with absolute absoluteness is that this president sees the long game. Even when a decision appears bad or immoral or politically craven or gross or childish or vindictive or hideous or unconscionable or just plain stupid — and none of his decisions ever appear that way, of course — you know it’s the right decision because he has never been wrong and never will be.

Yes, for the moment, a pro-choice Democrat has won a Senate seat in Alabama, a state Trump won overwhelmingly in the presidential election. But that’s all part of the Great Trumpian Plan.

Just listen to some of the damning things Jones said during his acceptance speech: “This entire race has been about dignity and respect. This campaign has been about the rule of law. This campaign has been about common courtesy and decency and making sure everyone in this state, regardless of what ZIP code you live in, is going to get a fair shake.”

Wow. Need some help prying your foot out of your mouth, Senator-elect Jones?

Trump clearly wanted this oaf to win so people could hear his “dignity and respect” babble and realize that what this country needs is more hard-charging, anti-dignity non-oafs like Donald Trump!

Jones continued to dig a grave for the Democrats: “I have always believed that the people of Alabama have more in common than divides us.”

More in common? Who wants that? This is the Trump age, baby, and we feast on division. We want everyone divided into our side and their side, winners and losers, lightweights and heavyweights, liars and good people.

It’s all clear now. President Trump wanted Jones to win, knowing a Jones victory would show the world what a lame and decent and compassionate liberal looks like. But he couldn’t have just thrown his support behind Jones. That would’ve been too predictable.

So he backs the creepy cowboy wannabe who got banned from a mall, knowing Moore is the only Republican on Earth who couldn’t win a Senate race in Alabama.

Jones wins, Americans see the repellent face of liberalism in his sniveling calls for unity and just like that — BOOM! — President Trump is on his way to re-election in 2020.

It’s the art of the deal, once again.

I tell you, the man never ceases to amaze me. Or, I imagine, himself.

rhuppke@chicagotribune.com

 

 

 

 

[Bethella]

3 hours ago, closetcagebaby said:

Most of the time they only count absentee ballots if the amount of ballots would make a difference in the election results. Otherwise, they go uncounted. 

That probably depends on your state election law. Every election I've worked (all in Michigan) we run all absentee and military votes. We usually wait to run them after the polls close because they tend to jam the machines after being folded but they are all run.

[hoipolloi]

13 minutes ago, Bethella said:

That probably depends on your state election law.

Yes. In jurisdictions where I've voted, the first set of results after the polls closed (usually produced within an hour) are primarily from advance voting, absentee & military ballots. They're all counted.

[fraurosena]

First of all, I'm so happy that Jones and decency won. The Repugliklans are being handed their asses to them at every turn, and it's such a good thing to see. I confess to doing a little happy dance this morning when I read the news.

Faux News blaming a bad candidate.... well, the presidunce endorsed him, so what does that tell you about him, eh? Nothing we don't know, but you are still full on supporting the toddler, aren't you?

4 hours ago, Cartmann99 said:

It's even higher than the percentage of white women that went for Trump in 2016. 

 

@Cartmann99, and anyone else dscouraged by these figures, please, please don't take to much stock on polls or percentages. Yes, 65% of the total amount of repug voters voted for Moore. But how many were that in absolute numbers? 65 out of a 100? Or was it 650 out of a 1000? That's a big difference right there. One really has to take all the information into account before adding any value to these statements about percentages. 

[ViolaSebastian]

1 hour ago, fraurosena said:

First of all, I'm so happy that Jones and decency won. The Repugliklans are being handed their asses to them at every turn, and it's such a good thing to see. I confess to doing a little happy dance this morning when I read the news.

Faux News blaming a bad candidate.... well, the presidunce endorsed him, so what does that tell you about him, eh? Nothing we don't know, but you are still full on supporting the toddler, aren't you?

I am so confused, because isn't that the whole point? That Roy Moore is a personified pile of garbage and so Alabamans ought to elect someone who isn't a serial sexual assaulter who preys on children? This wasn't like he was just unlikable or didn't photograph well, he is a bad person and therefore a bad candidate!

I mean, GOP, pick a better candidate next time. The bar doesn't have to be too high, just one who isn't sexually attracted to children. Just a suggestion.

[AmazonGrace]

1 hour ago, fraurosena said:

 

@Cartmann99, and anyone else dscouraged by these figures, please, please don't take to much stock on polls or percentages. Yes, 65% of the total amount of repug voters voted for Moore. But how many were that in absolute numbers? 65 out of a 100? Or was it 650 out of a 1000? That's a big difference right there. One really has to take all the information into account before adding any value to these statements about percentages. 

I saw this earlier

 

 

 

5 hours ago, AlwaysExcited said:

Dear Americans,

  Reveal hidden contents

I almost screamed when I read the news. Can't wait to see Trump's reaction. 

Here it is:

It checks out as a genuine Trump tweet: random Capitalization, self congratulation, the election was rigged against the Republican candidate in Alabama. Sad!

[Coy Koi]

I cannot put into words how happy I am that that Doug Jones won this election. I tried to abandon all hope after 45's election, out of a self-preservation instinct, but it didn't fully take. I still involuntarily held out some hope that decency would prevail. I am shocked and thrilled that it came through. Thank you so much, black voters in Alabama! You guys (AND ESPECIALLY WOMEN) are the best! I can still hardly remain coherent. But I'm so happy to be brought to incoherence over a victory instead of a defeat.

I hope Roy Moore reaps every single thing he has sowed.

[AmazonGrace]

I hope Doug Jones makes a name for himself soon, so he's not just the generic Democrat that beat the perv.

[IrishCarrie]

Greetings from Ireland, friends.

I had a rough night last night - saw my ex, he kissed me on the mouth, I got triggered, I didn't sleep, blahdey blahdey blah, you can imagine the mood I woke up in...

It was a struggle to get up and come to work, a struggle to turn on the computer and deal with emails and then I take a break and discover that ROY MOORE LOST!!!!!!!

Thank you, thank you, thank you to everyone who voted! Thank you to everyone who has posted on this thread and given me twenty minutes of giggling to myself. I feel better - there's light in the world again!

(It's possible I'm WAY too invested in American politics that - let's face it - don't directly affect me very much. But I hate Trump so much. He gives me the absolute squicks, always has ever since the days of the Apprentice. I hate his stupid face and his horrible voice and the absolute fuck**g INANITY of the stuff he says. He's everything that's wrong with today's world - the selfishness, self-absorption, ego-driven, attention seeking bullshit culture that we've moved towards.

But hey! He just got a giant slap in the face with a wet fish! So I'll take that for today

[fraurosena]

17 minutes ago, IrishCarrie said:

It's possible I'm WAY too invested in American politics that - let's face it - don't directly affect me very much. But I hate Trump so much. He gives me the absolute squicks, always has ever since the days of the Apprentice. I hate his stupid face and his horrible voice and the absolute fuck**g INANITY of the stuff he says. He's everything that's wrong with today's world - the selfishness, self-absorption, ego-driven, attention seeking bullshit culture that we've moved towards.

THIS. You’ve put so eloquently into words exactly what my sentiments are. I am surprised at myself that I am so invested in American politics right now, while I am not interested in politics at all, normally. At times it even feels a little obsessive... 

That said, I am interested in sociology, psychology and anthropology, and it’s fascinating to see all of these aspects at work in America at the moment in these controversial political times. Wish it didn’t have to cause so many of you so much anxiety though... 

[ViolaSebastian]

1 hour ago, AmazonGrace said:

I saw this earlier

 

 

 

Here it is:

It checks out as a genuine Trump tweet: random Capitalization, self congratulation, the election was rigged against the Republican candidate in Alabama. Sad!

This is not how I remember it going down. The Trump presidency is basically just a mass-gaslighting of everyone in America. 

On a side note, Moore is a TERRIBLE rider. Sassy should have dumped his ass on the ground. 

[pamplemousse]

Yay yay YAY for Doug Jones being elected over the Dump-endorsed Rethuglican pervert!  

That's all I got. Oh, yeah, and a big thanks to everyone who made the right choice at the polls.

[VelociRapture]

7 hours ago, Cartmann99 said:

It's even higher than the percentage of white women that went for Trump in 2016. 

 

I found an article that broke down the demographics and how they voted. 63% of white women voted for Moore, while 34% voted for Jones (2% did write-ins.) 52% of white women who went to college voted for Moore (45% for Jones) and 73% of white female non-college grads voted for Moore (25% for Jones.)

https://www.washingtonpost.com/graphics/2017/politics/alabama-exit-polls/?utm_term=.13bd9c874c72

53% of white women in the US voted for Trump - 45% of white female college grads voted for him and 62% of white female non-college grads voted for him. I can’t find a breakdown by sex or gender for Alabama during 2016, but I imagine it might be a higher percentage than the national average considering Trump swept 62.7% of the general election there (as opposed to Doug Jones winning by a bit more than a percentage point.)

I think a comparison between Alabama voters in 2016 and 2017 would be far more accurate than comparing to the US in general though. 

[formergothardite]

I got up early this morning and avoided the computer and television because I just couldn't handle the thought of all the gloating Moore and Trump would do. I finally checked FB while waiting to drop off my kid for school and saw Moore lost! I can't describe how happy I feel.  I am starting to think that this country will pull out of the awful darkness we entered in the 2016 elections. 

[laPapessaGiovanna]

Hooray for Alabama! Thank you!

I'm so happy for you guys! I feel like gloating from the other side of the pond, I can't imagine how great this moment was for you all. The tide can turn! 

I know this may sound strange coming from a foreigner but Trump is a danger for the whole world and needs to be kept in check.

This is an unmistakable FUCK YOU to this administration, even this WH, as full of imbeciles as it is, cannot misinterpret it. I am sure that that GOPs in the Senate and in the House got the message, not even the reddest state has enough loonies and kool aid drinkers to give them a pass on their complicity and abetting.

I am especially happy to read that there was a big voter turn out and that minorities voters chose blue in even higher numbers than with Obama in 2012. It's a very good sign waiting for November 2018.

[onekidanddone]

Bet Roy Moore/Bannon/Trump are cursing all the 'special rights' (Moore's exact words) from 1965.

[AmazonGrace]

1 hour ago, IrishCarrie said:

 

(It's possible I'm WAY too invested in American politics that - let's face it - don't directly affect me very much. But I hate Trump so much. He gives me the absolute squicks, always has ever since the days of the Apprentice. I hate his stupid face and his horrible voice and the absolute fuck**g INANITY of the stuff he says. He's everything that's wrong with today's world - the selfishness, self-absorption, ego-driven, attention seeking bullshit culture that we've moved towards.

But hey! He just got a giant slap in the face with a wet fish! So I'll take that for today

Ditto, except I didn't watch the Apprentice and was only vaguely aware of Trump existing in the world before 2016. I got invested in the election campaign because he was just so horrible in every way and he gave me the creeps. It makes me so sad, scared and angry that so many  people think that a lazy cyberbullying ignorant sociopathic misogynistic racist science hating corrupt money grubbing loudmouthed conman gangster who can't finish a coherent sentence,  lies at least twice in every tweet, blithely disregards environmental dangers, mocks the disabled, threatens nuclear war, promises the earth and the moon to every disadvantaged group  and then works to undermine their rights should have the nuke codes or any power over anything except changing his socks.

I always used to think that the USA was some sort of model democracy and a free speech paradise but the more I read about the voter suppression tactics and the Nazi headwinks and what seems like shameless corruption with the super rich megadonors it looks less and less true. Now it looks like just another country that is in the danger of falling into fascist propagandist hands unless good people do something and fast. Most of his policies don't directly affect me right now but eventually I think the Paris accord, the wars he tries to provoke, his dealings with Russia and all the statements that are a blessing to non-democratic dictators and misogynistic racist xenophobic pricks around the world affect everyone, even those of us who don't vote in the USA. I am seeing the Trump effect in local comment sections of online sites. Some of it seems much darker than it used to be, more openly hateful.

JMOO.

We have a local presidential election coming up next year and I can't whip up any interest in it. The current president will win another term and it's okay.  I didn't vote for him for the first time but he's okay. If any of the others win it would be okay too, because our president is mostly just a symbolic figure and because none of the parties chose to run  toxic crazy bullying idiots, as far as I know. I'm just blah who cares about it, so it's not that I tend to get overexcited and obsessed about all the politics. There's just a faint sense of dread hanging over the Trump saga and the various hangers-on. I mean, goddamit, you think who the hell would be STUPID enough to fall for any of that bullshit from that obvious bad liar, and then you realize that the answer is 62 million American voters and it kind of gets you down.    

 

[Cleopatra7]

Like a lot of posters, I assumed that Roy "I watch Nickelodeon for all the wrong reasons" Moore would easily win the election and everything would continue on its current horrid trajectory. Never have I been so glad to be wrong. Although most of the white vote still went to Moore, it was the black vote that really clinched it for Doug Jones. This election shows what happens when Democrats actually try to actively court Southern blacks and not just take the, "vote for us because we're not super racist like those other guys, but please don't stand too close to us in public" route. I'm not usually one for quoting scripture, but I keep thinking of the famous verse from Psalms 118: "The stone the builders rejected has become the cornerstone. This is from the Lord, and it is marvelous in our eyes." 

[samurai_sarah]

Another European here, who is delighted! Thank you, Alabamans and particular thanks to the black voters!

It's a relief to know that the Orange Menace doesn't have a stranglehold over Senate. As others have pointed out, American politics have an impact on the wider world, so by extension the good people of Alabama haven't only done themselves and the US a favour, but the entire world! Thank you for doing the decent thing!!!