Donald Trump - Healthiest Pres Evar!!111111

[EyeQueue]

Well, folks, doesn't it make you feel totes better that if Trump is elected, we will have the healthiest president ever in the history of presidents in 'Murica? But don't take my word for it, or Trump's word for it. There's outside, scientific-type, super-edumakaded doctor opinions on this shizz:

http://gawker.com/donald-trump-will-be-the-healthiest-individual-ever-el-1747945981

"To Whom My Concern." That's not even remotely a thing. Trump's years of having things ghost written are badly showing here, since I'm pretty sure he wrote this drek and had his highly-respected physician sign off on it.

And the superlatives! "Astonishingly Excellent!" "only positive results," etc. Gag me.

What a contemptible, pathological narcissist.

Oh, and here's a pic of the eminent physician. Kind of looks like an older version of KoDouche of Sister Wives fame:

And on a less humorous note, check out this article that shows just what a tempter-tantrum-throwing, black-and-white-splitting, poopy-diaper-baby-wearing serious narcissist this fuckwit really is:

http://www.vanityfair.com/news/2015/12/donald-trump-mark-bowden-playboy-profile

This would be some serious bad mojo for the US to have this turd blossom elected. I just can't with this narcissism and narcissistic rage. I'm dealing with a person very like this in real life right now, which is causing me and my family a shitton of issues. I can't imagine what someone like this would do for our country.

 

[AmazonGrace]

"Mr. Trump has had a recent complete medical examination which showed only positive results."

So, his Babinski sign and HIV test were positive?

 

http://www.theverge.com/2015/12/14/10123368/donald-trump-health-doctor-report-heaven-protect-me

 

Quote

Donald Trump, who had previously been believed to be a rotting pumpkin filled with bile and a 12-word vocabulary, has turned out to be an extremely healthy human being.

At least, according to "the highly respected Dr. Jacob Bornstein of Lenox Hill Hospital," otherwise known as "Dr. Jacob Bornstein, Harvard Medical School Class of 1942," otherwise known as "a person who died five years ago." The report was actually written by his son, Harold Bornstein, who says he has been Trump's doctor since 1980. I can't remember the last time someone I had known for 35 years forgot who I was and referred to me by my dead father's name several times, but I'm sure it happens to everyone.

I am proud to share this health report, written by the highly respected Dr. Jacob Bornstein of Lenox Hill Hospital. https://t.co/5RZa5of0TR

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump)

December 14, 2015

 

 

[EyeQueue]

3 minutes ago, AmazonGrace said:

"Mr. Trump has had a recent complete medical examination which showed only positive results."

So, his Babinski sign and HIV test were positive?

Curses! Foiled by their own superlatives!

ETA: And I love one of the comments that says something like: "I'm surprised they didn't also throw in the fact that Trump has the biggest and most rich, luxurious, and elegant penis that the physician has ever seen."

[bashfulpixie]

14 minutes ago, EyeQueue said:

Curses! Foiled by their own superlatives!

ETA: And I love one of the comments that says something like: "I'm surprised they didn't also throw in the fact that Trump has the biggest and most rich, luxurious, and elegant penis that the physician has ever seen."

Totally gagged on that one.  Not enough brain bleach for that statement.

[Catey]

58 minutes ago, bashfulpixie said:

Totally gagged on that one.  Not enough brain bleach for that statement.

Try not taking the entire member all at once, less gagging....

 

Sorry, could not help myself...

 

ETA: I take it they are not including his mental health

[bashfulpixie]

Oh that just made the need for brain bleach that more pressing.  Ick.  lol

[thebestusername]

Well the fact that his penis is made of solid gold goes without saying. What lady doesnt like a cold hunk of metal in her vag?

[zebra #13]

7 minutes ago, thebestusername said:

Well the fact that his penis is made of solid gold goes without saying. What lady doesnt like a cold hunk of metal in her vag?

Maybe he and Joshley should get together and discuss what the ladies of the night like?

[notfundy]

I caught this on the national news a couple of hours ago and wondered right away... what kind of physician SAYS this kind of shit?  "Healthiest ever"   ?????  WTF  ?????    How could anyone objectively know that?   

And yes - I noticed the "only positive results".   That is a very, very odd choice of words for a physician.   Laboratory results are one of the few examples of where (in most cases)  negative = good and positive = bad.   

Trump gets stranger by the minute and yet his poll numbers go up.  

The Republicans will have a brokered convention, Trump will flounce away and run as an independent --  the Dems are assured the win.    

If the Republicans run w/Trump they are destroyed as a party. (And they still lose.)   If they run WITHOUT him, they also lose but at least retain a shred of dignity.   What a strange country of low-information voters we've become.   

[church_of_dog]

14 minutes ago, notfundy said:

I caught this on the national news a couple of hours ago and wondered right away... what kind of physician SAYS this kind of shit?  "Healthiest ever"   ?????  WTF  ?????    How could anyone objectively know that?   

He personally examined all the others.  George Washington had gingivitis, because, you know, wooden teeth and all.  Abraham Lincoln had a skin tag on his scalp that looked suspiciously like a top hat.  Calvin Coolidge was close to healthiest ever, but he had ingrown toenails so he wouldn't win. 

[notfundy]

@church_of_dog    ha ha ha ha ha ha      Yup, of course.  He personally examined all the other presidents.  

[sawasdee]

But..but...but wasn't he 4F during the Vietnam War? It must be a miracle that whatever made him unfit to serve has so miraculously healed!

[47of74]

What the hell kind of doctor would publicly say these sort of things?  I know even if I had the body of someone half my age with abs of solid rock and a heart of steel and reproductive organs to boot my doctor still wouldn't boast about my health.

[EyeQueue]

4 minutes ago, 47of74 said:

What the hell kind of doctor would publicly say these sort of things?  I know even if I had the body of someone half my age with abs of solid rock and a heart of steel and reproductive organs to boot my doctor still wouldn't boast about my health.

The kind of doctor who, I suspect, got a healthy payment to sign off on the narcissistic blather Trump or his PR team wrote.

[AmazonGrace]

6 hours ago, notfundy said:

I caught this on the national news a couple of hours ago and wondered right away... what kind of physician SAYS this kind of shit?  "Healthiest ever"   ?????  WTF  ?????    How could anyone objectively know that?  

 

It stands to reason... most of the others are dead so they're clearly not in the best of health.

[Curious]

7 hours ago, 47of74 said:

What the hell kind of doctor would publicly say these sort of things? 

Well to be fair, since the Dr. that supposedly wrote the letter is dead, he may have...uh.."special" knowledge

[Season of life...]

Well, I wasn't doubting it, but still it's good to know through a bona fide source that Trump's ego, is, in fact, very healthy.

Whew!

[sawasdee]

11 hours ago, sawasdee said:

But..but...but wasn't he 4F during the Vietnam War? It must be a miracle that whatever made him unfit to serve has so miraculously healed!

Sorry to quote myself, but I have just discovered that 4F means unfit to serve for 'physical, mental, or moral reason'. Well, it wasn't physical, because he has such perfect health, so it must have been mental or moral - either of which, if sufficient to disqualify him for military service, very definitely would disqualify him from any high office, especially the Presidency. Maybe issuing that perfect health report  is a shot in his own foot?

ETA He was deferred 4 times - 3 for education, and the fourth 4F. I am sure it wasn't because he politically opposed the war.......

[SpoonfulOSugar]

10 hours ago, 47of74 said:

What the hell kind of doctor would publicly say these sort of things?  I know even if I had the body of someone half my age with abs of solid rock and a heart of steel and reproductive organs to boot my doctor still wouldn't boast about my health.

I agree.

Seems to me it's a recipe for a suit when The Donald drops dead of hubris.

(What, you can't die from that?  Well, damn.)

[samira_catlover]

11 hours ago, sawasdee said:

But..but...but wasn't he 4F during the Vietnam War? It must be a miracle that whatever made him unfit to serve has so miraculously healed!

NOW you're getting picky.

[HarryPotterFan]

16 hours ago, Catey said:

Try not taking the entire member all at once, less gagging....

 

Sorry, could not help myself...

 

ETA: I take it they are not including his mental health

I am now traumatized for life. I hope you're happy.

[Mecca]

I question these findings. I really do. I question if Dr. Bornstein did a complete examination of Mr. Trump.  If the doctor did, he surely would have found Donald's head up his own ass. 

[AmazonGrace]

He may be healthy but he really suffers:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3358633/The-Donald-s-bad-hair-day-Trump-hits-water-regulations-mean-t-wash-famous-locks-properly.html

 

The Republican frontrunner complained to supporters that rules put in place to conserve water during droughts had seriously hampered his ability to wash his hair.

‘It’s a disaster,’ he told rally of supporters in Aiken, South Carolina at the weekend.

‘So I build, and I build a lot of stuff, and I go into areas where they have tremendous water. And you have sinks where the water doesn’t come out.

‘You have showers where I can’t wash my hair properly. It’s true. They [showerheads] have restrictors put in. The problem is you stay under the shower for five times as long.’

ilyMail on Facebook

[sawasdee]

I wish I could give you more likes!

9 minutes ago, Mecca said:

I question these findings. I really do. I question if Dr. Bornstein did a complete examination of Mr. Trump.  If the doctor did, he surely would have found Donald's head up his own ass. 

 

5 minutes ago, AmazonGrace said:

He may be healthy but he really suffers:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3358633/The-Donald-s-bad-hair-day-Trump-hits-water-regulations-mean-t-wash-famous-locks-properly.html

 

The Republican frontrunner complained to supporters that rules put in place to conserve water during droughts had seriously hampered his ability to wash his hair.

‘It’s a disaster,’ he told rally of supporters in Aiken, South Carolina at the weekend.

‘So I build, and I build a lot of stuff, and I go into areas where they have tremendous water. And you have sinks where the water doesn’t come out.

‘You have showers where I can’t wash my hair properly. It’s true. They [showerheads] have restrictors put in. The problem is you stay under the shower for five times as long.’

ilyMail on Facebook

The stupidity is almost unbelievable. Please, America, come together to stop him - or I really do fear for the future. He is the king of publicity, and has such 'name brand recognition', that I am really scared he could sneak in.

[Mecca]

Trump washes his hair? I question that claim as well. Trump's hair looks like a pack of squirrels wrestling on his head.

Picture this. Every time that man is on my television, I look like my profile picture. I have that same look on my face. True story.