Ken Alexander reflects on his time at FJ:

[usmcmom]

Just as a decent husband would never have to "reign in a difficult wife," so should a decent lover never have to coerce or schedule sex.

Gentlemen, if you have to demand, set schedules, and guilt your wife into having sex...YOU AREN'T DOING IT RIGHT!

[2xx1xy1JD]

Just as a decent husband would never have to "reign in a difficult wife," so should a decent lover never have to coerce or schedule sex.

Gentlemen, if you have to demand, set schedules, and guilt your wife into having sex...YOU AREN'T DOING IT RIGHT!

I'm actually quite amazed that this discuss this in public or think that demanding sex with threats of discipline, God being angry, or being tossed out without custody of the kids or support = manly.

Most men I know IRL would take pride in being able to satisfy their wives, and admitting that your wife wouldn't sleep with you if you didn't force the issue is sort of like admitting to the world that your wife thinks that sex with you is lousy.

[Coconut Flan]

But I want you to understand that the head of every man is Christ, the head of a woman is her husband, and the head of Christ is God. Any man who prays or prophesies with his head covered dishonors his head, but any woman who prays of prophesies with her head unveiled dishonors her head - it is the same as if her head were shaven. For if a woman will not veil herself, then she should cut off her hair, but if it is disgraceful for a woman to be shorn or shaven, let her wear a veil. For a man ought not to cover his head, since he is the image and glory of God; but woman is the glory of man.

I still want dear Ken to explain why his wife doesn't cover her head. If he takes scripture literally as he says he does, then if he takes the headship seriously, it follows he should enforce head covering just as seriously.

He doesn't know why he believes half of what he believes. He picks the parts he likes that support what he wants to do.

So true, both Ken and CM are like ineffectual boys yelling what they want without looking to see how to reasonably accomplish their goals without simply being demanding.

[jerkit]

Scheduling of sex doesn't bother me so much. Right now, my husband is working a crazy schedule and so if we didn't say "let's have sex on Saturday after dinner" then it's probably not going to happen.

Then again, it's not a "you will have sex with me every Monday, Thursday, and Sunday at 8:45pm" situation it's a "we're so busy we have to figure a time to get some booty"

[feministxtian]

Ken and Armoire Ass's neverending spewage on us goes to show we have gotten under their skin. I think it's great!

However, I DO take issue with his mischaracterizations of us. I too am a Christian. A bible-reading, church-going, praying Christian. BUT...yeah, I cuss like the sailor's wife I am, I'm independent as all hell (see disabled husband), educated and do not play the submission game. I believe in the complementarian model of marriage, but I see it as TRUE complements. In other words, my strengths fit his weaknesses and his strengths fit my weaknesses. So we mesh together. I firmly believe that before I make some big decision, I should consult my husband and he should do the same. We've been going round and round on a certain decision, and have come to a consensus. Now that we've come to a consensus, I will probably get to make the "final" decision. BUT...it's not done by brow-beating, withholding sex, none of that crap. We've made the decision and my husband now will step back and leave the last decision to me. It's not unbiblical, as a matter of fact, that's how marriage is modeled in our church. True complementarian. It works...if people understand what it really means.

[Koala]

Ken Alexander:

The most ardent detractors are those who were hurt by their husbands and in turn blame their church for teaching submission.

I would love to know what Ken bases this on. I've been married to my highschool sweetheart for almost 13 years and you couldn't pry me away from him. Truly, I'd marry this man again in a second. On the other hand, if I was married to a guy like Ken I'd be thumbing through the yellow pages looking for a divorce lawyer.

I think what we're really seeing is Ken trying say that no one could possibly disagree with them if they'd had a good marriage- which is ironic considering how shitty his marriage to Lori has been.

Ken Alexander:

we are big proponents of spanking toddlers

Of all of the things out there that they could be "big proponents" of, they pick hitting toddlers. That says something about both of them.

Ken Alexander:

We hate seeing parents running around all day saying "no" a hundred times and threatening time out only to be exhausted and lose their joy in parenting, when a small swat on the bottom can quickly solve the issue.

A small swat? Let's take a look at how Lori describes it:

Lori Alexander:

The spanking has to be more painful than the pleasure of disobedience. We used a small leather strap and it hurt!

A spanking will work if it is hard enough. We used a small leather strap on their behind and it hurt!

Vikki, in the story above, had sons that were older and they just needed to be spanked harder.

A few swats on a bare bottom to have obedient children is not harsh but very biblical.

I told her she must take a wooden spoon or some other object and spank him on his bottom hard enough so it will hurt.

I spanked my children when I was angry because rebellion is so ugly and I didn't want them to act ugly.

I spanked in anger sometimes, because I was usually pretty upset with my children when they needed a spanking

My children definitely feared us growing up

Soooo, let's cut the shit and stop pretending that Lori is advocating for anything resembling a "small swat".

Let's also stop pretending that you are trying to save parents time, because we all know that your foolish wife once spent over 4 hours "swatting" your 18 month old:

Lori Alexander:

The first time our children had a temper tantrum or refused to obey us, around 18 months, Ken and I would take turns telling them to pick up the toys {or whatever they were refusing to do} and then give them a swat on their bottom if they wouldn't do it. With all four of our children, it took almost four long, difficult hours.

Ken Alexander:

We raised four godly children this way, and have seen no scars from it, only the learning of joyful discipline.

No scars, just a bruise, right Ken?

Ken Alexander:

I ca only remember creating a bruise on one child

Crazy how a "small swat" can leave a bruise huh?

Ken Alexander:

No matter how much I gave an accurate interpretation of what we believe and how we apply it, they would take another phrase from Lori's three years of writings and somehow twist it to make us look bad.

Yes Ken, no matter how much you talk you are unable to erase 3 years worth of Lori's vivid descriptions of how the pair of you beat your children. And if by "twist" you mean "directly quote" then yes, I guess we are twisting. If your own words make you look bad, then perhaps it's not us you should be mad at.

Ken Alexander:

We have learned from the group that when a blogger writes, they have to be considerate of those who may exaggerate what is said on one side or the other. So Lori has added some extra words to some of her posts just to try to be clearer for the 1% who might miss the meaning of her message.

Is exaggerate like twist? Does it also mean "direct quotes"???

Also, was the mom who caned her daughter and thought she'd broken her arm one of the 1% (I'll assume 1% is another statistic you pulled out of your ass for convenience) you're referring to?

Reader:

I had one that would never give in to anything, regardless of punishment, spanking did nothing but make her worse, time outs where a joke, finally I picked her up and threw her under a cold shower. The other one would push a bit but one look and he would do as he was told, he has been spanked maybe 4 or 5 times in his whole life. I empathise with this mother sometimes you just have to sit in a doorway...

Lori's response:

A spanking will work if it is hard enough

Reader:

Not with her, we tried hand, and although I was against it belt, wooden spoon, cane everything she would just keep going, I stopped after I thought I broke her arm... And tried other ways. The shower was the only thing that gave her pause... Of course she only acted this way at home at other peoples houses she was an angel I always had and still do get people saying how well behaved and good mannered she is.. Now she is older talking to her like an adult works the best. She is still head strong but I have also made a point of not 'saving ' her from her choices and making her deal with the consequences, like getting a D in maths when she is a perfectionist she now has to work to make it up.

If I recall correctly Lori just completely ignored her after that. Is she one of the 1% Ken? Because if she had taken Lori's advice to "hit harder" there's really no telling what would have happened to that child is there?

And what was your response to that reader's description of abusing her child?

Ken Alexander:

you know full well this was not an abusive mother.

Therefore we can gather that according to Ken:

Caning- not abusive

Belt- not abusive

Wooden spoon- not abusive

Think you might have broken your child's arm- not abusive

Cold shower- not abusive

Ken Alexander:

There is nothing godly about spanking your child, but there is something required of you by God to raise disciplined children.

Spanking is to be done modestly and if you choose not to spank, God is not necessarily displeased, but you are responsible for raising godly, well-disciplined children.

But in our minds, spanking and husband leadership are two important aspects of creating a healthy Biblical family and marriage.

Interesting, because Lori has been quoted saying the exact opposite.

Lori Alexander:

according to these verses, if you truly love your child, you will use a rod on them...

A few swats on a bare bottom to have obedient children is not harsh but very biblical.

Women stop reading my blog when I write about spanking and submission. They have unteachable hearts.

Ken Alexander:

Is Lori not entitled to an opinion or a means of expressing herself in training the younger women to love their husbands and be great mothers? That would be a shame if this group could shut her out with their screaming, as the fruit of her minister is so powerful and abundant.

1) Lori is absolutely entitled to her opinion just as we are each entitled to ours.

2) I assume that by "screaming" you mean "typing". How is it that we would shut down Lori's blog?

Ken Alexander:

Funny, I can handle the defamation better than I can the profanity that comes from some of their comments.

If you can find anything with which you disagree you are welcome to catch us on it, so long as the comments are not profanity laced

So let me get this straight:

~Lori can quote a man referring to women as "bitches" on her blog and that's okay.

~You can both read Storage Sociopath's blog in spite of the fact that both he and his wife use "profanity"

~Lori can wallow in SSM's blog and comments, where the word "profanity" doesn't even begin to describe the filth.

~Profanity at FJ = BAD!!!!

Got it. Awesome.

[salex]

I still want dear Ken to explain why his wife doesn't cover her head. If he takes scripture literally as he says he does, then if he takes the headship seriously, it follows he should enforce head covering just as seriously.

He doesn't know why he believes half of what he believes. He picks the parts he likes that support what he wants to do.

So true, both Ken and CM are like ineffectual boys yelling what they want without looking to see how to reasonably accomplish their goals without simply being demanding.

She doesn't cover her head for the same reason he was not all excited about her going "skirts only" -- because skirts only in and of itself is no biggy-- dresses are very much in fashion right now. I believe he was afraid she'd go frumper on him and that-- and headcoverings-- are not at all the image Ken has of himself as a successful businessman in southern california. It is all well and good for her to blather on about submission and God on a blog that people they know are aware of, as long as she fits the SoCal Image of successful stay at home housewife. When she ventures off to candy-land and starts posting pics of herself in frumpers and headcoverings, it would NOT reflect the lifestyle Ken wants to portray.

It certainly would not be a business asset for my husband for me to have dressed frumper and headcovering at any point in our marriage.

Edited to add a word that was clearly missing.

[Loveday]

Ken Alexander:

I would love to know what Ken bases this on. I've been married to my highschool sweetheart for almost 13 years and you couldn't pry me away from him. Truly, I'd marry this man again in a second. On the other hand, if I was married to a guy like Ken I'd be thumbing through the yellow pages looking for a divorce lawyer.

I think what we're really seeing is Ken trying say that no one could possibly disagree with them if they'd had a good marriage- which is ironic considering how shitty his marriage to Lori has been.

Ken Alexander:

Of all of the things out there that they could be "big proponents" of, they pick hitting toddlers. That says something about both of them.

Ken Alexander:

A small swat? Let's take a look at how Lori describes it:

Lori Alexander:

Soooo, let's cut the shit and stop pretending that Lori is advocating for anything resembling a "small swat".

Let's also stop pretending that you are trying to save parents time, because we all know that your foolish wife once spent over 4 hours "swatting" your 18 month old:

Lori Alexander:

Ken Alexander:

No scars, just a bruise, right Ken?

Ken Alexander:

Crazy how a "small swat" can leave a bruise huh?

Ken Alexander:

Yes Ken, no matter how much you talk you are unable to erase 3 years worth of Lori's vivid descriptions of how the pair of you beat your children. And if by "twist" you mean "directly quote" then yes, I guess we are twisting. If your own words make you look bad, then perhaps it's not us you should be mad at.

Ken Alexander:

Is exaggerate like twist? Does it also mean "direct quotes"???

Also, was the mom who caned her daughter and thought she'd broken her arm one of the 1% (I'll assume 1% is another statistic you pulled out of your ass for convenience) you're referring to?

Reader:

Lori's response:

Reader:

If I recall correctly Lori just completely ignored her after that. Is she one of the 1% Ken? Because if she had taken Lori's advice to "hit harder" there's really no telling what would have happened to that child is there?

And what was your response to that reader's description of abusing her child?

Ken Alexander:

Therefore we can gather that according to Ken:

Caning- not abusive

Belt- not abusive

Wooden spoon- not abusive

Think you might have broken your child's arm- not abusive

Cold shower- not abusive

Ken Alexander:

Interesting, because Lori has been quoted saying the exact opposite.

Lori Alexander:

Ken Alexander:

1) Lori is absolutely entitled to her opinion just as we are each entitled to ours.

2) I assume that by "screaming" you mean "typing". How is it that we would shut down Lori's blog?

Ken Alexander:

So let me get this straight:

~Lori can quote a man referring to women as "bitches" on her blog and that's okay.

~You can both read Storage Sociopath's blog in spite of the fact that both he and his wife use "profanity"

~Lori can wallow in SSM's blog and comments, where the word "profanity" doesn't even begin to describe the filth.

~Profanity at FJ = BAD!!!!

Got it. Awesome.

Koala, I...you...I have no words. I can only bow down to your skill in presenting Lori and Ken, with their own words, completely in context, exactly as they truly are. :worship:

PS--Another Bible-believing, praying Christian here, been one for over 40 years. I'm also a SAHM, have been since before my first was born in 1989. Just so you know, Ken. ;)

[SunnyAndrsn]

So, he welcomes "healthy discussion", but refuses to ever consider re-thinking the whole child spanking and wife submission thing. His "discussions" invariably boil down to saying "we believe in this, period."

Oh, and any way of interpreting the bible other than their way is wrong. If you cite studies, you are valuing psychology over God. If you mention your own experience, it still doesn't count because everything would be better if you did it the True Christian way. If you cite Bible verses, you must have gotten them wrong. If you refer to original Greek and Hebrew and put things in context and try to make a reasonably intelligent and sophisticated argument, that's bad because God clearly meant for things to do interpreted literally by any idiot. If you disagree, you are clearly being rebellious to them and be extension to God.

But yeah, healthy discussion is totally welcome.

Healthy discussion in Ken Speak actually means agree with everything he says, basically being a leg humper to him and Lori.

True Christianity, in Ken Speak = The Gospel According to Ken & Lori Alexander. Anything else is false, slanderous, and likely libel since it disagrees with him. See also the definition for "healthy" discussion.

[church_of_dog]

I'm just getting a chuckle out of thinking about how the phrase "skirts only" could be interpreted to mean "no shirt". :lol:

I really need a life. That is all.

[Firiel]

Ken Alexander:

I would love to know what Ken bases this on. I've been married to my highschool sweetheart for almost 13 years and you couldn't pry me away from him. Truly, I'd marry this man again in a second. On the other hand, if I was married to a guy like Ken I'd be thumbing through the yellow pages looking for a divorce lawyer.

I think what we're really seeing is Ken trying say that no one could possibly disagree with them if they'd had a good marriage- which is ironic considering how shitty his marriage to Lori has been.

Ken Alexander:

Of all of the things out there that they could be "big proponents" of, they pick hitting toddlers. That says something about both of them.

Ken Alexander:

A small swat? Let's take a look at how Lori describes it:

Lori Alexander:

Soooo, let's cut the shit and stop pretending that Lori is advocating for anything resembling a "small swat".

Let's also stop pretending that you are trying to save parents time, because we all know that your foolish wife once spent over 4 hours "swatting" your 18 month old:

Lori Alexander:

Ken Alexander:

No scars, just a bruise, right Ken?

Ken Alexander:

Crazy how a "small swat" can leave a bruise huh?

Ken Alexander:

Yes Ken, no matter how much you talk you are unable to erase 3 years worth of Lori's vivid descriptions of how the pair of you beat your children. And if by "twist" you mean "directly quote" then yes, I guess we are twisting. If your own words make you look bad, then perhaps it's not us you should be mad at.

Ken Alexander:

Is exaggerate like twist? Does it also mean "direct quotes"???

Also, was the mom who caned her daughter and thought she'd broken her arm one of the 1% (I'll assume 1% is another statistic you pulled out of your ass for convenience) you're referring to?

Reader:

Lori's response:

Reader:

If I recall correctly Lori just completely ignored her after that. Is she one of the 1% Ken? Because if she had taken Lori's advice to "hit harder" there's really no telling what would have happened to that child is there?

And what was your response to that reader's description of abusing her child?

Ken Alexander:

Therefore we can gather that according to Ken:

Caning- not abusive

Belt- not abusive

Wooden spoon- not abusive

Think you might have broken your child's arm- not abusive

Cold shower- not abusive

Ken Alexander:

Interesting, because Lori has been quoted saying the exact opposite.

Lori Alexander:

Ken Alexander:

1) Lori is absolutely entitled to her opinion just as we are each entitled to ours.

2) I assume that by "screaming" you mean "typing". How is it that we would shut down Lori's blog?

Ken Alexander:

So let me get this straight:

~Lori can quote a man referring to women as "bitches" on her blog and that's okay.

~You can both read Storage Sociopath's blog in spite of the fact that both he and his wife use "profanity"

~Lori can wallow in SSM's blog and comments, where the word "profanity" doesn't even begin to describe the filth.

~Profanity at FJ = BAD!!!!

Got it. Awesome.

*slow clap*

...I think I love you.

[Tiger Lily]

lorialexander.blogspot.com/2014/07/kens-response-to-woman-fearing-my.html

Take home message? We quoted Lori and Ken directly so he had her go back and edit her posts so they don't look like exactly what they are.

I'm late to this thread, but here are my observations:

1. Why are Ken and Lori talking about spanking AGAIN?

2. They welcome anything BUT healthy discussion. They don't like to be disagreed with. I noticed that on my very first visit to their site. Not exactly teachable, are they?

3. Ken says people here try to damage his business. Is he serious? And btw, who in their right mind uses their own names for a blog, lists their occupation, the area where they live and the names of family members? It would be so very easy to Google these people. I'm wondering if Ken and Lori have ever regretted using their real names.

4. They criticize the people here at FJ yet they definitely don't come across as kind, loving or humble people themselves. OTOH, they come across as rather harsh and judgmental. The blogs they link to appear to be the same. In this case, like must attract like.

5. So if we don't agree with Ken and Lori, we automatically must not be Christians (even those who repeatedly say they are). Did it ever occur to them that Christians may frequent FJ to rail against spiritual abuse?

6. For the record, I was not hurt by my husband. I was hurt and abused by my church and hate to see others similarly abused whether it happens in an actual church setting or during online "mentoring."

7. Same old. Same old.

[polecat]

Just as a decent husband would never have to "reign in a difficult wife," so should a decent lover never have to coerce or schedule sex.

Gentlemen, if you have to demand, set schedules, and guilt your wife into having sex...YOU AREN'T DOING IT RIGHT!

I personally wouldn't find it particularly appealing to have to schedule sex, but I have had a few friends who got so busy that they really did have to or they'd have never gotten around to it. I don't see scheduling sex as a huge issue, but demanding and guilting her into it? THAT is a huge problem.

Hey, Ken? In reference to this:

The most ardent detractors are those who were hurt by their husbands and in turn blame their church for teaching submission.

Bullshit. (Whoa, dude, a Christian woman cursing! The world just might end!) According to your old bat of a wife, churches don't even TEACH biblical submission any more, so I really don't even understand what you're on about here. But just so you know, in almost 14 years of marriage and 16 years of togetherness, my husband has managed to not abuse me in the name of godly authority. He has never isolated me, locked me in a cabin or threatened me for not having sex with him. Because he's a reasonably decent human being. Unlike men who insist that twice-weekly sex equals a sexless marriage and that unenthusiastic sex equals abuse.

Long story short ... you are speaking out of your ass yet again (Bible word ftw!). You don't know what you're talking about, but you ramble on endlessly in the hopes that people will get bored, stop reading and assume you know what you're talking about. That little trick got me through more than a few essay tests in junior high, but once you're in high school and beyond, you damned (another Bible word!) well better know what you're talking about or SOMEONE is going to call you out on your idiocy.

[salex]

Between this whiny diatribe and his saying that a wife might stay with a husband who molested one/some of their kids, depending on what particular kind of molestation it might have been... well, Ken, this one's for you.

[Firiel]

3. Ken says people here try to damage his business. Is he serious? And btw, who in their right mind uses their own names for a blog, lists their occupation, the area where they live and the names of family members? It would be so very easy to Google these people. I'm wondering if Ken and Lori have ever regretted using their real names.

One member mentioned the possibility of letting his co-workers know about Lori's blog. That idea was immediately shot down by other members as taking things way too far. Thus, the story that we are trying to damage his business was born. :roll:

The most ardent detractors are those who were hurt by their husbands and in turn blame their church for teaching submission.

Sorry, guys. I'm responsible for this. My ex-husband was a narcissistic, cheating, maybe-emotionally-abusive arse of a pastor. And I mentioned that the teaching of Biblical submission led me to "submit more" as a way to try to fix our marriage. Now, everyone who disagrees with submission had an arse of a husband who clearly wasn't a True Christian^TM.

[HoneyBunny]

Did anyone catch happywife's comment before lori deleted?

Yes, I did. Her comment was not about the Pearls, but about the Duggars. HappyWife pointed out that they were part of a religious cult, and nothing more than that. Nothing about kids raising siblings, girls without futures, none of that. Just that they were part of a cult where the leader was being investigated for sexual abuse and harassment. Of course, Lori can't stand dissension in the ranks of any kind.

Interestingly, her pro-spanking comments on Storage Sociopath's blog were deleted, because apparently she was being questioned over there, and instead Ken wrote another wall of text about them not condoning spanking, as long as parents do their Biblical duty and raise up Godly children.

The entertainment value of this: priceless. Again I have to ask: when do these men work? When does Lori have time to prepare all her healthy meals, read the Bible and clean house? It ain't happening, folks. I have to limit myself to 30 minutes a day of them all combined, or things slip here.

[Tiger Lily]

Ken Alexander:

I would love to know what Ken bases this on. I've been married to my highschool sweetheart for almost 13 years and you couldn't pry me away from him. Truly, I'd marry this man again in a second. On the other hand, if I was married to a guy like Ken I'd be thumbing through the yellow pages looking for a divorce lawyer.

I think what we're really seeing is Ken trying say that no one could possibly disagree with them if they'd had a good marriage- which is ironic considering how shitty his marriage to Lori has been.

Ken Alexander:

Of all of the things out there that they could be "big proponents" of, they pick hitting toddlers. That says something about both of them.

Ken Alexander:

A small swat? Let's take a look at how Lori describes it:

Lori Alexander:

Soooo, let's cut the shit and stop pretending that Lori is advocating for anything resembling a "small swat".

Let's also stop pretending that you are trying to save parents time, because we all know that your foolish wife once spent over 4 hours "swatting" your 18 month old:

Lori Alexander:

Ken Alexander:

No scars, just a bruise, right Ken?

Ken Alexander:

Crazy how a "small swat" can leave a bruise huh?

Ken Alexander:

Yes Ken, no matter how much you talk you are unable to erase 3 years worth of Lori's vivid descriptions of how the pair of you beat your children. And if by "twist" you mean "directly quote" then yes, I guess we are twisting. If your own words make you look bad, then perhaps it's not us you should be mad at.

Ken Alexander:

Is exaggerate like twist? Does it also mean "direct quotes"???

Also, was the mom who caned her daughter and thought she'd broken her arm one of the 1% (I'll assume 1% is another statistic you pulled out of your ass for convenience) you're referring to?

Reader:

Lori's response:

Reader:

If I recall correctly Lori just completely ignored her after that. Is she one of the 1% Ken? Because if she had taken Lori's advice to "hit harder" there's really no telling what would have happened to that child is there?

And what was your response to that reader's description of abusing her child?

Ken Alexander:

Therefore we can gather that according to Ken:

Caning- not abusive

Belt- not abusive

Wooden spoon- not abusive

Think you might have broken your child's arm- not abusive

Cold shower- not abusive

Ken Alexander:

Interesting, because Lori has been quoted saying the exact opposite.

Lori Alexander:

Ken Alexander:

1) Lori is absolutely entitled to her opinion just as we are each entitled to ours.

2) I assume that by "screaming" you mean "typing". How is it that we would shut down Lori's blog?

Ken Alexander:

So let me get this straight:

~Lori can quote a man referring to women as "bitches" on her blog and that's okay.

~You can both read Storage Sociopath's blog in spite of the fact that both he and his wife use "profanity"

~Lori can wallow in SSM's blog and comments, where the word "profanity" doesn't even begin to describe the filth.

~Profanity at FJ = BAD!!!!

Got it. Awesome.

Absolutely horrifying. My sibs and I were spanked frequently as children. Through our church's teaching, our mother attempted to break our collective "evil spirit." All spanking did was modify behavior. It didn't change us inside. The lessons I needed to learn I eventually learned with maturity. Spanking didn't have much to do with that. As a result, I have raised my children very differently. Yes, it takes more effort not to spank, but it's definitely worth it.

[Firiel]

Yes, I did. Her comment was not about the Pearls, but about the Duggars. HappyWife pointed out that they were part of a religious cult, and nothing more than that. Nothing about kids raising siblings, girls without futures, none of that. Just that they were part of a cult where the leader was being investigated for sexual abuse and harassment. Of course, Lori can't stand dissension in the ranks of any kind.

Interestingly, her pro-spanking comments on Storage Sociopath's blog were deleted, because apparently she was being questioned over there, and instead Ken wrote another wall of text about them not condoning spanking, as long as parents do their Biblical duty and raise up Godly children.

The entertainment value of this: priceless. Again I have to ask: when do these men work? When does Lori have time to prepare all her healthy meals, read the Bible and clean house? It ain't happening, folks. I have to limit myself to 30 minutes a day of them all combined, or things slip here.

I still see them... are you talking about her "let the principal hit kids" remarks?

[Coconut Flan]

Twisting words while accusing those who quote Lori and him directly is a Kenism.

I believe he was afraid she'd go frumper on him and that-- and headcoverings-- are not at all the image Ken has of himself as a successful businessman in southern california. It is all well and good for her to blather on about submission and God on a blog that people they know are aware of, as long as she fits the SoCal Image of successful stay at home housewife. When she ventures off to candy-land and starts posting pics of herself in frumpers and headcoverings, it would NOT reflect the lifestyle Ken wants to portray.

Exactly. Thus Ken only selects to believe and follow what suits his purposes and ignores or changes the interpretation of the rest giving the lie to his following God's word exactly as printed in the KJV. So his entire argument is invalid since he refuses to follow it himself.

Logic is not your friend, Ken. You can't pick and choose and then say the KJV is to be believed and followed exactly word for word.

[Tiger Lily]

Ken and Armoire Ass's neverending spewage on us goes to show we have gotten under their skin. I think it's great!

However, I DO take issue with his mischaracterizations of us. I too am a Christian. A bible-reading, church-going, praying Christian. BUT...yeah, I cuss like the sailor's wife I am, I'm independent as all hell (see disabled husband), educated and do not play the submission game. I believe in the complementarian model of marriage, but I see it as TRUE complements. In other words, my strengths fit his weaknesses and his strengths fit my weaknesses. So we mesh together. I firmly believe that before I make some big decision, I should consult my husband and he should do the same. We've been going round and round on a certain decision, and have come to a consensus. Now that we've come to a consensus, I will probably get to make the "final" decision. BUT...it's not done by brow-beating, withholding sex, none of that crap. We've made the decision and my husband now will step back and leave the last decision to me. It's not unbiblical, as a matter of fact, that's how marriage is modeled in our church. True complementarian. It works...if people understand what it really means.

I very much agree. I actually consider myself to be a submissive wife. I do that voluntarily by lining myself behind my husband and supporting him. I'm naturally more submissive anyway and he naturally has the more dominant personality. Thing is, he loves me as Christ loves the church so much so that he always puts me first and asks for my input. He rarely makes a decision without discussing it with me first and it's usually one we agree on. For my part, I value his opinion, take his advice and trust his biblical knowledge. We're a real team so to others, we actually look egalitarian yet I believe we complement each other perfectly. I believe that when the husband truly loves the wife as Christ loves the church and the wife truly supports and respects her husband, this does look like mutual submission.

I think the difference in how submission is viewed is due to how the individual interprets it and I believe that those who have the proclivity to abuse are going to abuse submission because they need the control which to me, indicates deep insecurity and/or deep narcissism.

[Koala]

Ken Alexander (from his time here at FJ):

It might surprise you too that my marriage is very much egalitarian in the way it functions, and I like it that way. Submission is a gift a wife may give her husband and he would have to be a pretty big jerk to take advantage of her willingness to consider wishes as more important than hers.

Ken Alexander (from today's comments on Lori's blog):

Well, I set that lie straight right away, that I am married to a highly intelligent, articulate and strong willed wife who I try not to control in any way, including her blog.

"Highly intelligent and articulate". :evil-eye: l o effing l

Ken Alexander (when a member of FJ suggested Lori should come here and speak for herself):

And no, you will never get to Lori directly with question responses as I would not allow it and you know why.

[Koala]

Ken and Lori contradicting each other...again:

Ken Alexander:

Sitting on the fireplace steps was our most effective discipline tool which was used often, but defiance in a child met with a swat.

Lori Alexander:

We didn't have to resort to charts, bedtime routines, stickers, or time outs. We spanked them if they didn't obey us!

[Tiger Lily]

Ken and Lori contradicting each other...again:

Ken Alexander:

Lori Alexander:

You know what they say. There's his side, her side and the truth whatever that may be in this case. It's almost as if they lived in two different houses at times, lol.

[polecat]

Ken Alexander (from his time here at FJ):

Ken Alexander (from today's comments on Lori's blog):

"Highly intelligent and articulate". :evil-eye: l o effing l

Ken Alexander (when a member of FJ suggested Lori should come here and speak for herself):

Let's all pause for a moment to let that sink in: Ken claims to believe that Lori is highly intelligent and articulate. Did they change the definitions of these words, too?

[ShesCrafty]

Ken Alexander:

I would love to know what Ken bases this on. I've been married to my highschool sweetheart for almost 13 years and you couldn't pry me away from him. Truly, I'd marry this man again in a second. On the other hand, if I was married to a guy like Ken I'd be thumbing through the yellow pages looking for a divorce lawyer.

I think what we're really seeing is Ken trying say that no one could possibly disagree with them if they'd had a good marriage- which is ironic considering how shitty his marriage to Lori has been.

Ken Alexander:

Of all of the things out there that they could be "big proponents" of, they pick hitting toddlers. That says something about both of them.

Ken Alexander:

A small swat? Let's take a look at how Lori describes it:

Lori Alexander:

Soooo, let's cut the shit and stop pretending that Lori is advocating for anything resembling a "small swat".

Let's also stop pretending that you are trying to save parents time, because we all know that your foolish wife once spent over 4 hours "swatting" your 18 month old:

Lori Alexander:

Ken Alexander:

No scars, just a bruise, right Ken?

Ken Alexander:

Crazy how a "small swat" can leave a bruise huh?

Ken Alexander:

Yes Ken, no matter how much you talk you are unable to erase 3 years worth of Lori's vivid descriptions of how the pair of you beat your children. And if by "twist" you mean "directly quote" then yes, I guess we are twisting. If your own words make you look bad, then perhaps it's not us you should be mad at.

Ken Alexander:

Is exaggerate like twist? Does it also mean "direct quotes"???

Also, was the mom who caned her daughter and thought she'd broken her arm one of the 1% (I'll assume 1% is another statistic you pulled out of your ass for convenience) you're referring to?

Reader:

Lori's response:

Reader:

If I recall correctly Lori just completely ignored her after that. Is she one of the 1% Ken? Because if she had taken Lori's advice to "hit harder" there's really no telling what would have happened to that child is there?

And what was your response to that reader's description of abusing her child?

Ken Alexander:

Therefore we can gather that according to Ken:

Caning- not abusive

Belt- not abusive

Wooden spoon- not abusive

Think you might have broken your child's arm- not abusive

Cold shower- not abusive

Ken Alexander:

Interesting, because Lori has been quoted saying the exact opposite.

Lori Alexander:

Ken Alexander:

1) Lori is absolutely entitled to her opinion just as we are each entitled to ours.

2) I assume that by "screaming" you mean "typing". How is it that we would shut down Lori's blog?

Ken Alexander:

So let me get this straight:

~Lori can quote a man referring to women as "bitches" on her blog and that's okay.

~You can both read Storage Sociopath's blog in spite of the fact that both he and his wife use "profanity"

~Lori can wallow in SSM's blog and comments, where the word "profanity" doesn't even begin to describe the filth.

~Profanity at FJ = BAD!!!!

Got it. Awesome.

Koala, I adore how you can calmly show how idiotic and delusional these two nitwits are by using their own words against them. I wish I too had that ability but, alas, that rape apologist Ken Alexander disgusts me so much I find I am unable to comment without using unladylike "profanity". *hangs head in shame * :wink-kitty: