Steve Maxwell asks if you are a failure

[Jana814]

I'm not sure I want to live in a reality where the Maxwells are benchmark for success.

Me either!

[MamaJunebug]

HoneyBunny, Steve now sends out e-mails with a short article he does called Seriously (seriously, that's the title of it). Because it's an e-mail communication, it can't be posted here, unfortunately.

SPASH, I'm very curious, what exactly was the context of this question? What type of failure is he talking about? As a parent? A businessman? A spouse?

SPHASH, i'm curious about this too! I know you won't requote the email here, and I endorse that, but can you give us a little more detail about how he asked us about being failures? Did he give any remedies for our failing situations? Many thanks!

[SPHASH]

SPHASH, i'm curious about this too! I know you won't requote the email here, and I endorse that, but can you give us a little more detail about how he asked us about being failures? Did he give any remedies for our failing situations? Many thanks!

The gist of it was if you stop trying you failed. Also he compares pro athletes, businessmen etc having success but it doesn't matter only being saved does. Then he uses a bible verse I think it was Timothy to back him up. Unfortunately I deleted the email.

[Childless]

I must be a complete failure according to Steve. I've got a college degree, lived independently for 15 years, work in a male dominated field, traveled the world (by myself), didn't get married until I was 34 years old, am a manager who presides over males, have a stay at home husband who cares for our son, and will only have 2 children by choice. I love my life and find the Maxwells' lifestyle utterly horrendous. Thanks, Stevie, but I'd rather be a failure.

[thoughtful]

The gist of it was if you stop trying you failed. Also he compares pro athletes, businessmen etc having success but it doesn't matter only being saved does.

Damn, I'm exhausting poor Claude these days.

[salex]

The gist of it was if you stop trying you failed. Also he compares pro athletes, businessmen etc having success but it doesn't matter only being saved does. Then he uses a bible verse I think it was Timothy to back him up. Unfortunately I deleted the email.

So, this sounds to me that our questions about if their business might be faltering a bit could be true, but he's not a failure, because he is still trying. And those successful business people-- well, he'll be laughing at them from heaven.

I figure he moved this to email instead of the blog so he cold gather email addresses to send out more ads -- early release notifications, etc-- as a marketing tool.

[DefraudedByPlaid]

Being successful doesn't automatically mean you have to meet the visible benchmarks of "success". I think a lot depends on having the courage to keep living day by day, to keep moving forward, and to keep trying to face your fears - fears which will look different for each person. Someone who for whatever reason doesn't have a degree, still lives with their parents, etc. might be working through their own life challenges. It sounds like the Maxwell are captives to their fears (hence all the control issues), which is where the problem lies for me; not that some adult children still live at home per se, but their reasons for doing so.

[daisyjane1234]

I find it both interesting and telling that Steve no longer posts his messages online for public viewing. Private mass emails are perfect for avoiding any kind of public scrutiny or accountability for his ideas. He can rock all sorts of crazy theology and it is not available for public reading and discussion.

[singsingsing]

For real, if Steve Maxwell didn't consider me a complete failure I would be VERY worried!

[SPHASH]

I wonder if I will be taken off the email list now.

[Trynn]

I am a failure, but not for the reasons stevejohva thinks.

[RosyDaisy]

I don't give a rat's ass what Steve Maxwell thinks. My father is a much better man than Steve Maxwell. Fiancée says ditto about his dad. BTW, my fiancée likes to read here with me. He likes FJ.

[VodouDoll]

Is the FJ policy against posting emails for ALL emails? Steve's mass-emailed newsletter is treated the same as a personal one on one private communication? I just want to make sure I understand the policy.

[Handmaiden of Dog]

You know who I consider to be a failure? Teri Maxwell. Steve had some sort of mental breakdown and Teri did jackall to protect her family. What Steve has done to his children-- basically brainwashed them and kept them as hostages-- is horrifying not holy. Teri is the only one who had the ability to confront him and make him see how far down the rabbit hole he was falling. She could have fled with her children. She could have at least imposed some sanity on the situation by making sure there was still a connection to the outside world, some rules in place that allowed the children to make real choices. But instead she caved. Now the entire family will remain prisoners of Steve's demented mind until his death.

[16strong]

You know who I consider to be a failure? Teri Maxwell. Steve had some sort of mental breakdown and Teri did jackall to protect her family. What Steve has done to his children-- basically brainwashed them and kept them as hostages-- is horrifying not holy. Teri is the only one who had the ability to confront him and make him see how far down the rabbit hole he was falling. She could have fled with her children. She could have at least imposed some sanity on the situation by making sure there was still a connection to the outside world, some rules in place that allowed the children to make real choices. But instead she caved. Now the entire family will remain prisoners of Steve's demented mind until his death.

Actually, I think Teri's breakdown and her depression were part of why she did not flee with the children or try to get Steve help. It's not like she herself was mentally healthy. She probably felt pretty hopeless and when Steve went neurotic and came up with an answer for both their problems (devout fundamentalism) she followed him straight down the rabbit hole, because she had 3 children and didn't know how else to cope. I don't know if I would necessarily call Teri guilty. I think Steve pulled a bait and switch on her- convinced her that fundamentalism would fix all her problems, and then used it against her to keep her from leaving by the time she realized it might not be such a great idea after all. So then, the only option left was to cling to it like a life boat.

[mystikchick17]

I find it very telling that, over time, Steve has gone from authoring a monthly column posted on the site, to a monthly podcast (posted on the site) to a private monthly email. As of this month. One has to wonder whether it's because he knows his columns come in for more snark over here than Teri's and because he knows we can't c/p his private mass mailings publicly.

Hi, Steve.