The Return of Sparkling Adventures - Merge

[adidas]

It's not universally banned - our local Aboriginal tribe lets women play, but never during ceremonies. All boys are welcome to play, initiated or not.

[lilith]

It's not universally banned - our local Aboriginal tribe lets women play, but never during ceremonies. All boys are welcome to play, initiated or not.

That's modern aboriginal custom, and there is nothing at all wrong with that. Modern tribes don't generally hold initiation rituals (and if they do they are watered down a lot), hold to traditional marriage and gender role customs, exclude half aboriginal members from ceremonies, or many of the other traditional tribal practices. There's nothing wrong with that in my opinion - all cultures move forward and change.

But just like me telling my kids bible stories as a cultural relic doesn't make me a Christian, modernised Koori groups sharing their history and a modified ans sanitised version of their customs doesn't make them tribal aborigines with a profound religious connection to the land.

Nothing wrong with any of that, but when people imbue what has become a cultural practice with deep spiritual significance it makes me roll my eyes.

I am, btw, part aboriginal.

[adidas]

That's modern aboriginal custom, and there is nothing at all wrong with that. Modern tribes don't generally hold initiation rituals (and if they do they are watered down a lot), hold to traditional marriage and gender role customs, exclude half aboriginal members from ceremonies, or many of the other traditional tribal practices. There's nothing wrong with that in my opinion - all cultures move forward and change.

But just like me telling my kids bible stories as a cultural relic doesn't make me a Christian, modernised Koori groups sharing their history and a modified ans sanitised version of their customs doesn't make them tribal aborigines with a profound religious connection to the land.

Nothing wrong with any of that, but when people imbue what has become a cultural practice with deep spiritual significance it makes me roll my eyes.

I am, btw, part aboriginal.

Are you familiar with Associate Professor Linda Barwick from the University of Sydney? These are some of the things she has to say after 15 years of research:

http://www.aboriginalart.com.au/didgeridoo/myths.html

While it is true that in the traditional didgeridoo accompanied genres of Northern Australia, (e.g. Wangga and Bunggurl) women do not play in public ceremony, in these areas there appears to be few restrictions on women playing in an informal capacity. The area in which there are the strictest restrictions on women playing and touching the Didgeridoo appears to be in the south east of Australia, where in fact Didgeridoo has only recently been introduced.

Our local tribe still has a lot of old customs. They hold initiation ceremonies (some travel to the NT. Circumcision for the boys and knocking out a tooth for the girls). Australia is like Europe to the Aboriginal people. One land, many languages, different customs and many nations. A custom in one area can be totally different in another. My local custom is that women can play the didgeridoo but not during ceremonies. It is not a modern custom in this area. It might be different in yours, which is why I said it is not universally banned.

[adidas]

BTW I have never played it. I have no interest in doing it.

Edited to add that I really like what the author wrote here.

The clamour of conflicting voices about the use of Didgeridoo by women and by outsiders has drawn attention to the potential for international exploitation and appropriation of traditional music and other Aboriginal cultural property. In addition, the debate has drawn to international attention the fact that there are levels of the sacred and the secret in traditional Aboriginal beliefs, many of them restricted according to gender. Perhaps the Didgeridoo in this case is functioning as a false front, standing in for other truly sacred and restricted according to Aboriginal ceremonial life that it can not be named in public. In this way, the spiritualising of the Didgeridoo not only panders to the commercial New Age niche, but also serves as a means of warning non-Aboriginal people to be wary of inquiring too closely into sacred matters.

[lilith]

Are you familiar with Associate Professor Linda Barwick from the University of Sydney? These are some of the things she has to say after 15 years of research:

http://www.aboriginalart.com.au/didgeridoo/myths.html

Our local tribe still has a lot of old customs. They hold initiation ceremonies (some travel to the NT. Circumcision for the boys and knocking out a tooth for the girls). Australia is like Europe to the Aboriginal people. One land, many languages, different customs and many nations. A custom in one area can be totally different in another. My local custom is that women can play the didgeridoo but not during ceremonies. It is not a modern custom in this area. It might be different in yours, which is why I said it is not universally banned.

I understand that, and I'm willing to admit that I may be wrong.

I will note that Lauren is in South Eastern Australia. My experience is with northern NSW and Hawkesbury area tribes, again, eastern and relatively southern, and its that experience from which I speak and that tradition which Lauren is appropriating.

My understanding is that aboriginal tribes who used the didgeridoo ceremonially only allowed it to be touched by men. It's phallic connotations are obvious, and all traditional aboriginal societies had very specific gender roles and divides.

Tribal customs have changed, by both need and choice, as tribal aborigines have integrated into mainstream Australian society. Many tribal practices would be illegal under Australian law, as well as abhorrent to many Australians. It is my understanding that initiation ceremonies in the tribes who still practice them have been changed to reflect modern standards and laws, especially in relation to child protection as they typically take place during puberty, before the age of eighteen. I have spoken to and read the opinions of aboriginal elders from many tribes who don't consider those initiated under the more modern rules as initiated members of the tribe. Many particularly object to a mixed race aborigine, whose ancestral "country" can't be identified to their satisfaction, attempting initiation.

What I'm trying to say is that even though societies change and adapt, those aboriginal tribes, of which there are many, who consider it taboo for a woman or uninitiated man to touch a didgeridoo, deserve to have their customs respected. I don't think that anyone should be prevented from playing the instrument, but I don't think they should claim connection to a history and spirituality through it if that is not their experience and their heritage. I have no issue with anyone incorporating it into their own spiritual practice, but local tribes value their customs and spirituality and deserve to have it respected. An analogy is that anyone can hand out bread and claim it as the body of Christ, but to do so in vestments and claim that one is part if catholic tradition if one is not would be wrong.

[lilith]

BTW I have never played it. I have no interest in doing it.

Edited to add that I really like what the author wrote here.

I know of Professor Barwick, and also her (justified, IMHO) reputation as a revisionist historian. I, personally, have little respect for the field of revisionist history, whatever the agenda.

[adidas]

I agree with a lot of what you say with regards to the cultural appropriation (which is why I pulled that second quote and posted it), that's not what I'm arguing. I'm not advocating that women play the didgeridoo. I just said that it's not universally banned, and it's not a modern custom for my local tribe. That's all.

I'm not arguing about the change in tribal customs or things that are accepted in different areas (though just the language used by different people on this thread is testament enough. No capitalisation, the word 'aborigines' which is seen as a slur in my area, plus the use of Aboriginal as a noun rather than an adjective). Yes, many Aboriginal tribes see women playing the didgeridoo as taboo. I would argue that the majority do. I'm simply saying that it's not universally banned. The local women here will fight for their right to play it and will give you a huge lecture if you try to tell them they're not allowed!

Lauren lives in SE Qld, not SE Australia.

Anyway Downton Abbey is starting. I'd much rather talk about that. I hate that the UK and US see it so much before us (though I watched them as they were being streamed so it's a rewatch for me). I saw 3 huge spoilers on a UK news site.

[lilith]

I agree with a lot of what you say with regards to the cultural appropriation (which is why I pulled that second quote and posted it), that's not what I'm arguing. I'm not advocating that women play the didgeridoo. I just said that it's not universally banned, and it's not a modern custom for my local tribe. That's all.

I'm not arguing about the change in tribal customs or things that are accepted in different areas (though just the language used by different people on this thread is testament enough. No capitalisation, the word 'aborigines' which is seen as a slur in my area, plus the use of Aboriginal as a noun rather than an adjective). Yes, many Aboriginal tribes see women playing the didgeridoo as taboo. I would argue that the majority do. I'm simply saying that it's not universally banned. The local women here will fight for their right to play it and will give you a huge lecture if you try to tell them they're not allowed!

Lauren lives in SE Qld, not SE Australia.

Anyway Downton Abbey is starting. I'd much rather talk about that. I hate that the UK and US see it so much before us (though I watched them as they were being streamed so it's a rewatch for me). I saw 3 huge spoilers on a UK news site.

She's in Melbourne now though.

I think that we generally agree and are arguing essentially the same point from different sides - which is ludicrous.

I have downloaded the latest Downton series, but have yet to covert it to a format my iPad will accept. You've reminded me to get Partner to set it to converting before bed, thank you.

[Guest Anonymous]

I'm pleased to see that Lauren's leghumpers seem to be outnumbered by some sharper commenters on her latest 'red sparkly gypsy FB page.

Red Gypsy Lauren

Do you think we can trust our children? In what ways should children *not* be trusted?

Like · · Share · @Abidjanaise on Twitter · 10 hours ago via Twitter ·

2 people like this.

G............I think trusting our children is good and important but I think it's different ENTRUSTING things to our children. For example I do not entrust my children's safety to them - cause Theo's the kinda kid that just tried to ride a chair down our back stairs.

9 hours ago · Like · 21

Red Gypsy Lauren That's an important distinction, G..., thanks for sharing your wisdom!

9 hours ago · Like · 5

C..... I'm loving your new name, honey! . It's very important to me that I demonstrate trust in my children, even at their current young ages. I believe that if I give them some choice and responsibility and show them that I trust them, they then have the ability, confidence, and opportunity to show that they can complete tasks and achieve goals; thus it builds self-esteem. The one big thing I don't trust them in, though, is their ability to judge danger. They don't have the life experience that I possess, and they are not yet as equipped as I to know what is or isn't safe or beneficial for them. In these situations, I am more than happy to direct them! xxx

9 hours ago via mobile · Like · 3

S....... I absolutely agree I have been much more trusting in my childrens choices of late but them making choices about there safety not so much. They have the mentality that things cant and wont happen to them. So we must watch over there safety.

9 hours ago · Like · 1

L..... I don't trust children to always know what is best for them, to be safe around water or roads or to be able to protect themselves from bullies or hostile adults, what's why they have parents!

9 hours ago · Like · 2

M..... i trust him more than I ever thought I would trust my child prior to becoming a mother. but i also work harder than I thought I would, to properly answer his questions everyday so that he understands his experiences and their potential consequences/good aspects, properly. i leave him to make as many decisions about himself and his day as possible, but when it comes to potential safety issues, I am pedantic to say the least.

9 hours ago · Like · 2

K.... When the issue at hand exceeds their developmental capacity to process accurately

9 hours ago via mobile · Like · 1

D.... They should not be trusted to make adult decisions that are ours alone (as parents) to make for them, until they are old/mature enough to know HOW to make them, themselves. It's not really about trust, it's that they sometimes don't have the necessary tools to be trustworthy.

6 hours ago · Like · 2

T...... I don't expect (trust) that my kids will be able to judge the intent or motives of adults. It's not a complaint on my part, I truly do want them to be innocent to the evils of people for a long time. I'm glad that alarm bells don't go off for them wh...See More

6 hours ago · Like · 1

Pay attention to the bolded, please, Lauren.

[ladyaudley]

I just noticed on facebook Lauren has changed her name from Lauren Fisher to Red Gypsy Lauren. I guess her regular name just wasn't sparkling enough anymore!

Lauren is already a changed name. She writes about it somewhere, in one of the posts where she's changing their childrens' names. She changed Stephanie to Brioni because she was reading Atonement (and that Briony is naturally exactly who you want to emulate!), they changed Callista to Calista and Aϊcha to Aisha. David apparently had changed his name twice at that stage.

sparklingadventures.com/index.php?id=3 is the post about Brioni's namechange, sparklingadventures.com/index.php?id=518 has all the name changes in it.

Going back to find that post, it strikes me how strange it is that in only five years, the woman who wrote this "The midwife was really surprised when David let them (her brothers-in-law) into the delivery suite, and I was not impressed.

I was lying naked on the gory delivery bed, holding the baby naked on my chest, catheter in, with only a sheet to cover me."

changed so much that that whole freebirthing thing with Elijah happened. That video on youtube is pretty graphic.

[August]

Oh, Dreadlocks of Authenticity! Am dying here.

[pixydust]

Bullies don't care about that. If she was bullied for aving freckles, she was bullied for having freckles.

I'm curious as to why you believe anything that Lauren says. She changes her personal history all the time to make it suit her. Yes, I know that bullies will pick on anything, but not all American girls are blondes, so that makes me doubt her damn story. Lauren was probably disliked because she is fake and uses people.

[already hungover]

I'm curious as to why you believe anything that Lauren says. She changes her personal history all the time to make it suit her. Yes, I know that bullies will pick on anything, but not all American girls are blondes, so that makes me doubt her damn story. Lauren was probably disliked because she is fake and uses people.

Despite her Dreadlocks of Authenticity, I don't think that Lauren has the self-awareness to know WHY she is or was disliked. She just attributes it to all of us being way less enlightened than she is.

[August]

I'm curious as to why you believe anything that Lauren says. She changes her personal history all the time to make it suit her. Yes, I know that bullies will pick on anything, but not all American girls are blondes, so that makes me doubt her damn story. Lauren was probably disliked because she is fake and uses people.

Some things are so commonplace that you'd be surprised if they weren't true. Think back to high school, there were three or four people with Lauren's freckles at mine and none of them were treated well. They're like glasses, a typical target.

[Wolfie]

Some things are so commonplace that you'd be surprised if they weren't true. Think back to high school, there were three or four people with Lauren's freckles at mine and none of them were treated well. They're like glasses, a typical target.

People with freckles and glasses at my high school were treated just fine. My family was one of those with the freckles. Yeah, I got teased about other things, but not freckles, and while my sister hated her glasses, it wasn't something she got teased about. (my siblings and I are close in age and were all in high school at the same time)

[August]

Different at my school. That poor girl who had freckles, glasses, was very tall and socially awkward to boot.

[Wolfie]

Different at my school. That poor girl who had freckles, glasses, was very tall and socially awkward to boot.

I'd guess it was the fact that she was socially awkward, not the fact that she had freckles and glasses, those were just things that they said. Bullies will pick on a person and figure out what that person is insecure about.

[August]

And Lauren isn't socially awkard? Look at that cupcake debacle.

[So Many Lies]

Lauren is already a changed name. She writes about it somewhere, in one of the posts where she's changing their childrens' names. She changed Stephanie to Brioni because she was reading Atonement (and that Briony is naturally exactly who you want to emulate!), they changed Callista to Calista and Aϊcha to Aisha. David apparently had changed his name twice at that stage.

sparklingadventures.com/index.php?id=3 is the post about Brioni's namechange, sparklingadventures.com/index.php?id=518 has all the name changes in it.

Going back to find that post, it strikes me how strange it is that in only five years, the woman who wrote this "The midwife was really surprised when David let them (her brothers-in-law) into the delivery suite, and I was not impressed.

I was lying naked on the gory delivery bed, holding the baby naked on my chest, catheter in, with only a sheet to cover me."

changed so much that that whole freebirthing thing with Elijah happened. That video on youtube is pretty graphic.

I couldn't agree more. She has come a long way. I think the difference in the births is particularly illustrative.

However, I have more than a little sympathy. I would not want everyone traipsing in before I could at least rest a bit shower and look at my newborn with my husband, alone. He came accross terribly selfish in that post.

[So Many Lies]

And Lauren isn't socially awkard? Look at that cupcake debacle.

Are you talking about those awesome playgroup cupcakes? They were gorgeous. There had to be some other reason no-one mentioned the cup cakes, like something she had already said or done to offend.

But for the record I despise playgroup. I am not good at it. I have to admit Lauren was right about something. There is an undercurrent of competitiveness at most playgroups. Who is the "best parent" shown usually by the fussing, the tweaking, the right cap/hat, the right snack. The most expensive pram. The right mummywear. The thinly veiled boasting. :cry: Oh God, it's awful.

[So Many Lies]

I'm curious as to why you believe anything that Lauren says. She changes her personal history all the time to make it suit her. Yes, I know that bullies will pick on anything, but not all American girls are blondes, so that makes me doubt her damn story. Lauren was probably disliked because she is fake and uses people.

Yeah, I have to agree. It seems like a lie/half truth

[August]

Are you talking about those awesome playgroup cupcakes? They were gorgeous. There had to be some other reason no-one mentioned the cup cakes, like something she had already said or done to offend.

But for the record I despise playgroup. I am not good at it. I have to admit Lauren was right about something. There is an undercurrent of competitiveness at most playgroups. Who is the "best parent" shown usually by the fussing, the tweaking, the right cap/hat, the right snack. The most expensive pram. The right mummywear. The thinly veiled boasting. :cry: Oh God, it's awful.

Where do you live? Remind me never to move there. In my circles, making fancy cupcakes to impress the other mothers would put you on the outer straight away. Because one-upmanship is so try-hard.

[So Many Lies]

Where do you live? Remind me never to move there. In my circles, making fancy cupcakes to impress the other mothers would put you on the outer straight away. Because one-upmanship is so try-hard.

Well I don't live there now but I assure you it's not an uncommon sentiment. But theoretically if someone brought cupcakes like that along I would say "Hey, nice cupcakes!", one-upmanship or not. On the other hand, the cupcakes wouldn't make me want to be someone's friend, as she seemed to think it would. I thought it was quite sad she said she expecting someone to be her friend because of the cupcakes. Conversely they wouldn't make me not want to be someone's friend as that is rather harsh. I mean, people are allowed to make cool cupcakes if they want to.

[happy atheist]

Few things make me want to hang out with Lauren less than this sentence:

We're privileged to witness the reunion of two friends who spontaneously start a beat-boxing session that lasts about ten minutes.

And I'm sure you will all be relieved to know that Lauren considers the didge festival's vibe "authentic."

[Blahblah]

Few things make me want to hang out with Lauren less than this sentence:

And I'm sure you will all be relieved to know that Lauren considers the didge festival's vibe "authentic."

Those poor children. Every time I read anything by this demented woman it gets worse. I can just imagine the crap she spouts.

"Ooh look at that Aisha. I hope you realize what a privilege it is to watch these two smelly hairy people make horrible noises with each other for an entire 10 minutes. Most children are too busy having proper hair cuts and eating proper nutritious food and sleeping in their own beds and, you know, going to school, to do sparkling things like shit in trench toilets and bathe in polluted swamps. Why no Aisha my dreads are not using up all of our money. Of course I can buy you some food. Look, have this mung bean that I found in that smelly hairy person's tent over there. It is a privilege to share food with other people. No, that means we share their food Aisha. It doesn't mean we have to give them anything in return. Now I'm just going off to spout some more sparkling garbage on my sparkling website so look after your sisters will you?"