News from Boundless: Kissing can Turn you on! And it's Bad!

[Shina]

Oh good lord, I don't know why I even read this site anymore. Just more fundie one-upping and marriage obsession.

http://www.boundlessline.org/2012/09/ca ... ss+Line%29

Some poor fundie-light guy asks "CAN I JUST PLAIN KISS HER?" (sic) of his girlfriend and basically is informed that no, because kissing could give him a boner and that's bad.

Comments are a good mix of people who've drank a vat of the Kool-aid and some with sense.

Edited attempting to breaking link, urgh.

[AddieBelle]

Have you read wintery knight's blog? This sounds like something he would say.

[erunerune]

Boundless alternately cracks me up, makes my head explode, and reminds me to be a good citizen by supporting Planned Parenthood.

If all of the energy they waste on agonizing over first base could be harnessed effectively, it might used to solve ACTUAL GENUINE ISSUES.

I'm clearly on the other end of the spectrum, since my personal motto is "Make out with everyone."

[Cannelle]

If I had waited until marriage to kiss, I might have ended up married to my first serious boyfriend, whose idea of kissing involved ramming his tongue so far down my throat that I gagged, and mashing his nose against mine so that my nostril was closed and I couldn't breathe. Not a good kisser, that one.

I wonder how many fundies are stuck with partners who kiss terribly.

[Shina]

AddieBelle, I had not heard of this douchebag. I can now thank you for my Red Bull-fueled rage, gracias.

Ugh! His willful ignorance about the basic fucking definition of feminism makes me stabby. And the fact that a 30-something dude has never kissed a girl...Might that be less because of his ubergodiless and more due to the fact that he doesn't find women attractive?

[Deleted01]

I absolutely would NOT have wanted my very first kiss to be at my wedding in front of all those people. I do understand waiting for sex (I didn't) but kissing? I just don't get it at all.

[BlackHawk]

Uhm.. so everything that gives you a boner is bad? When I was about 14 I was swimming and that gave me a boner... so is swimming wrong? Should I never swim again?

I will never understand this line of thinking, and maybe it's because I'm a heathen who is sexually satisfied in my relationship, but kissing the Partner doesn't give either one of us a boner. Even before we were making whoopie, holding hands with the partner, kissing him, or hugging him did not give me a boner. My question is why are fundies getting horny with every interaction with another human? What is so wrong in their world that even hugging someone makes them so horny they cannot control themselves? That makes no sense to me!

[Shina]

Boundless alternately cracks me up, makes my head explode, and reminds me to be a good citizen by supporting Planned Parenthood.

If all of the energy they waste on agonizing over first base could be harnessed effectively, it might used to solve ACTUAL GENUINE ISSUES.

I'm clearly on the other end of the spectrum, since my personal motto is "Make out with everyone."

QFFT on everything you said erunerune.

[ElphabaGalinda]

Boundless alternately cracks me up, makes my head explode, and reminds me to be a good citizen by supporting Planned Parenthood.

If all of the energy they waste on agonizing over first base could be harnessed effectively, it might used to solve ACTUAL GENUINE ISSUES.

I'm clearly on the other end of the spectrum, since my personal motto is "Make out with everyone."

That's my motto too! Great motto! My first kiss wasn't really that great, it takes practice. But things that turn you on aren't evil, they're awesome.

[aubrietta]

If I had waited until marriage to kiss, I might have ended up married to my first serious boyfriend, whose idea of kissing involved ramming his tongue so far down my throat that I gagged, and mashing his nose against mine so that my nostril was closed and I couldn't breathe. Not a good kisser, that one.

I wonder how many fundies are stuck with partners who kiss terribly.

Did we date the same guy? Because my first kiss was a dude who did exactly this...and even though I'd never kissed anyone before, I was quite certain he was doing it very badly. I dumped him because his kisses grossed me out. My next BF's lovely smooches confirmed first BF was a kissing failure. I bet a lot of fundies are stuck with terrible kissing partners but they don't know any better.

[freejoytoo]

I had an argument about this with people on another forum, substituting sex for kissing. Their argument was that if you love someone it doesn't matter if you're not compatible. My argument was that it's best to get some practice in first. Personally, I think it's better to find out if you're compatible sooner rather than later but hey, that's just me.

[Shina]

People who think love will overcome sexual incompatibility are morons. Can it? Sure, sometimes.

However my personal anecdata says otherwise. My first boyfriend and I were completely incompatible. One of us wanted sex about once a month and the other would have been delighted to bang every day. (Bonus points if you can guess which one was me. Hint, fundie stereotypes were completely wrong) We were in love, but I was completely miserable much of the time, thinking there was something wrong with me, feeling ugly and rejected, trying to make something work that wasn't working.

[freejoytoo]

Everyone seems rather prudish over there and seem to think what I'm saying is shocking :lol:

[ILoveJellybeans]

My first kiss was kinda boring and unromantic, I wouldnt want to have found that out on our wedding day.

[Shina]

freejoytoo it's pretty damn easy for virginal fundies to be all "love can conquer all" when they've never dated someone that they weren't compatible with.

Hey, I personally believe in "test driving" as soon as possible because for me sexual compatibility is HUGE. I'd much rather see if we're compatible on date 1 than invest a ton of time and emotion into something that might fail miserably once we actually get naked (or more likely, limp along because we want to make it work).

[samurai_sarah]

I had an argument about this with people on another forum, substituting sex for kissing. Their argument was that if you love someone it doesn't matter if you're not compatible. My argument was that it's best to get some practice in first. Personally, I think it's better to find out if you're compatible sooner rather than later but hey, that's just me.

I agree with you. The idea that love/some deity will sort it all out may be romantic, but if two people are incompatible that's not going to magically solve everything. Personally, I think getting some practice is a good thing. Getting some practice taught me an awful lot about myself, and helped me figuring out what I'm looking for in a partner. I couldn't imagine making a commitment like marriage, without knowing precisely what both parties are in for.

[Distant Lines]

So if kissing could cause a boner, why the hell would they want it to be shared in front of freaking everyone in your church? Could you imagine being at a wedding and seeing the groom pop a boner?

[Michael Mock]

My question is why are fundies getting horny with every interaction with another human? What is so wrong in their world that even hugging someone makes them so horny they cannot control themselves? That makes no sense to me!

My personal theory is that it's precisely because they deny themselves so much in the way of human physical contact. If you essentially never touch anyone, ever, under any circumstances, is it really so surprising that even brushing hands would be a huge thrill, and a kiss would consume your world?

[ILoveJellybeans]

They also live in a world where boys are taught that because theyre male, they are uncontrollable sexual beings who get turned on by everything, and cant even see their sisters shoulder without getting defrauded.

[samurai_sarah]

They also live in a world where boys are taught that because theyre male, they are uncontrollable sexual beings who get turned on by everything, and cant even see their sisters shoulder without getting defrauded.

That's one of the (many) things that fundies do that I find icky. Under normal* circumstances, the Westermarck effect takes care of sexual attraction between siblings, and to a degree even among children that were raised together closely. Basically, we're conditioned not to regard close siblings (blood or not) as potential sexual mates. Fundies seem to actively counteract the Westermarck effect by sexualizing siblings, while claiming to do the opposite.

* By "normal" I mean a situation, in which the assumption is that siblings aren't getting turned on by one another. To my knowledge that's mostly the case, across the world.

edited for clarity

[SpeakNow]

I think this lovely comment sums up the fundie mentality:

Can't wait to finally, eventually learn to kiss! Looks eew but I'm told is the opposite. A romantic endeavour I am looking forward to undertaking.

The thought alone induces oodles of giddyness.

[slh12280]

To be honest, my reaction to my first kiss was ewww. I went on to kiss him more so apparently I got over it but good thing my first kiss isn't going to happen at my wedding (whenever that happens)

[themadapple]

Well, let's see. My first kiss was with a girl, while drunk. My second was with a guy in a bar in Germany. My third and subsequent were with he who is now my ex, who was the tongue jammer type. And to be honest, I rarely got the female boner equivalent. Really depends on the situation.

And in any event, were fundie light guy to acquire a boner, what's so terrible about that? It's a normal physical response that can't really be helped and can happen for a number of reasons. Mind you, he can help what he does with said boner. Otherwise, what do these people expect him to do should it happen? Scrub it with a Brillo pad? Try and give it verbal commands, like a dog? :lol:

Sheesh. The complexes. I couldn't imagine going through my life thinking my body was a filthy sordid hopeless corruption device.

[ILoveJellybeans]

Mind you, he can help what he does with said boner. Otherwise, what do these people expect him to do should it happen? Scrub it with a Brillo pad? Try and give it verbal commands, like a dog? :lol:

Hit it with plumbing line?

[themadapple]

Hit it with plumbing line?

"To Train Down A Penis" - hm.