Modest =/= Frumpy

[Defrauding Errday]

This post is inspired by the headcovering topic. Why don't certain fundies (like the Duggars) realize that you don't have to dress like Little House on the Prairie to be modest? There are girls at my school who dress modestly for religious reasons. They look stylish without showing much skin at all.

[Third]

They claim it's about modesty but it's about control. They control their girls by having them believe they are responsible for every stray thought a man might have, that they need to fear their bodies...it feeds the unhealthy self image they need to keep their females in line. If not women would rise up, put on some jeans and tell husband to fix his own dinner.

[Esther]

Yeah, I know lots of Modern Orthodox women who dress modestly (even to fundie standards - no knees, no elbows, no collarbone, hair covered when married) and who look fabulous. Modesty isn't limited to frumpers and those awful little lace headcoverings, guys. Ick.

[Koala]

They claim it's about modesty but it's about control. They control their girls by having them believe they are responsible for every stray thought a man might have, that they need to fear their bodies...it feeds the unhealthy self image they need to keep their females in line. If not women would rise up, put on some jeans and tell husband to fix his own dinner.

:clap:

[fluttershies]

It's definitely about control. I will hold my hands up and admit to dressing pretty frumpily - but it's my choice, and my mum would certainly prefer me to be more fashionable, lol. I don't dress sloppily as such, but rather older than my age and for comfort, and imo both of those things reflect my bookish personality quite well. I dress for myself alone.

[stabbycat]

Why risk the chance of a girl becoming independent if you let her choose her own style of clothing? It's far easier to make her and her sisters wear matching frumpers, lace caps, etc.

[Sola]

This post is inspired by the headcovering topic. Why don't certain fundies (like the Duggars) realize that you don't have to dress like Little House on the Prairie to be modest? There are girls at my school who dress modestly for religious reasons. They look stylish without showing much skin at all.

I don't think the Duggar girls do dress like little house any more. The seven sisters do, but the Duggars left that behind a few years ago. I don't mind the way they dress now, it is similar to the way I dress (long skirts mostly), although J'Chelle REALLY needs a makeover. She needs some Gok Wan!

[kunoichi66]

This post is inspired by the headcovering topic. Why don't certain fundies (like the Duggars) realize that you don't have to dress like Little House on the Prairie to be modest? There are girls at my school who dress modestly for religious reasons. They look stylish without showing much skin at all.

Hell to the yes! Thank you!

I dress quite modestly, more because I don't like showing a lot of skin than for religious reasons, but I manage to look quite stylish (in my own humble opinion) while I'm doing it!

Though for the record, I do quite like Prairie dresses :oops:

[Third]

Michelle has the same hair my mother had in the late 80s into the early 90s. It's bad it needs to go.

I could probably be mistaken for a Duggar - I wear skirts [yet am not against walking DS to the school bus in yoga pants] I don't think it's the fact they wear modern clothes it's the fact about WHY they wear them. They are given a very narrow set of rules on acceptable clothes and they know why. They don't want to cause a brother in Christ to stumble and this starts young - apparently a toddler in pants is less modest...what kind of sick fuck things a toddler\little girl is immodest. All my friends who are Muslim didn't start covering [wearing their Hijabs] until they were 12-13 or got their periods. Even they realize a child isn't being sexy etc.

I'd love to get a dress for DD like Carrie wore when she was tiny. So cute!

[fluttershies]

I don't think the Duggar girls do dress like little house any more. The seven sisters too, but the Duggars left that behind a few years ago. I don't mind the way they dress now, it is similar to the way I dress (long skirts mostly), although J'Chelle REALLY needs a makeover. She needs some Gok Wan!

I imagined Michelle getting the Gok treatment and snorted Dandelion & Burdock out of my nose :D

But yeah, the J'Slaves actually dress pretty nicely now. Even Anna dresses better than Michelle.

[Lady]

I imagined Michelle getting the Gok treatment and snorted Dandelion & Burdock out of my nose :D

But yeah, the J'Slaves actually dress pretty nicely now. Even Anna dresses better than Michelle.

I think Anna looks great. She is someone I could look at and say, "this isn't so bad" if I was considering Gothardism. Of course, that would only work until she opens her mouth.

[lawfulevil]

I dress quite modestly and comfortably/functionally but it's got nothing to do with religion...

When I leave the house I usually wear a long skirt, shorts underneath, a well-fitting bra, and a loose but not too baggy long-sleeved blouse. My shoes are flats or low (1-2") heels. I'm violently allergic to copper to the point that even most jewelry in precious metals makes me break out, so my wedding ring is tungsten carbide and I don't wear much else. Inside the house I wear battered yoga pants (bleach stains, small holes from the cats climbing me, etc) and whatever shirts my husband's dragged home from a comic con for me, since my animals would cheerfully ruin my nice clothes if I let them.

I wear minimum of makeup except for special occasions (I use tinted SPF moisturizer everyday, but that's about it). For special occasions I add more in neutral colors and subtle. I always wear nail polish, since I make my own. I never figured out how to do anything to my hair so I just rely on leave-in conditioner and a touch of mousse to tame flyaways, then put it up. I wear big ol glasses and the one time I tried whitening my teeth they hurt for months, so they're not perfectly white.

I think I could be easily mistaken for a fundie, and I often am, so this election season I've heard a mind-bending amount of really stupid/bigoted things from cashiers, fellow shoppers, people at the park, etc. Maybe I need to dye my hair pink, since there's no way on earth I'm wearing hot pants.

[Witsec7]

This post is inspired by the headcovering topic. Why don't certain fundies (like the Duggars) realize that you don't have to dress like Little House on the Prairie to be modest? There are girls at my school who dress modestly for religious reasons. They look stylish without showing much skin at all.

The duggars really haven't been wearing frumpers since TLC opened the money faucets. In the old days when Jboob was first running for office they wore some fuglly stuff. I would like to see Juterus burn the shirt though.

[gardenvarietycitizen]

Yeah, I know lots of Modern Orthodox women who dress modestly (even to fundie standards - no knees, no elbows, no collarbone, hair covered when married) and who look fabulous. Modesty isn't limited to frumpers and those awful little lace headcoverings, guys. Ick.

I think a lot of the fundie Christians LIKE being frumpy. They brag constantly about not fitting in, too. That way if someone comments on their dress, they have a great opportunity to proselytize the lifestyle and how much better they are for it and how the clothes aren't just clothes but some embodiment of these high ideals they have.

In some ways they're not all that different from hipsters, come to think of it.

[Little Miss Alien]

I definitely always believed it to he a control thing. I tend to be always cold, so even in the Summer I'll wear a light cardigan apart from on the hottest days. I do wear short dresses, but only with leggings. I just don't see why certain groups believe that you can only dress like a frump or like a streetwalker. This "modern modest" thing (apart from the poorly matched clothing) is often no different to the things I wear. Except, you know, I wear skinny jeans on occasion - shocking!

[icecreamycakeycake]

I dress quite modestly and comfortably/functionally but it's got nothing to do with religion...

When I leave the house I usually wear a long skirt, shorts underneath, a well-fitting bra, and a loose but not too baggy long-sleeved blouse. My shoes are flats or low (1-2") heels. I'm violently allergic to copper to the point that even most jewelry in precious metals makes me break out, so my wedding ring is tungsten carbide and I don't wear much else. Inside the house I wear battered yoga pants (bleach stains, small holes from the cats climbing me, etc) and whatever shirts my husband's dragged home from a comic con for me, since my animals would cheerfully ruin my nice clothes if I let them.

I wear minimum of makeup except for special occasions (I use tinted SPF moisturizer everyday, but that's about it). For special occasions I add more in neutral colors and subtle. I always wear nail polish, since I make my own. I never figured out how to do anything to my hair so I just rely on leave-in conditioner and a touch of mousse to tame flyaways, then put it up. I wear big ol glasses and the one time I tried whitening my teeth they hurt for months, so they're not perfectly white.

I think I could be easily mistaken for a fundie, and I often am, so this election season I've heard a mind-bending amount of really stupid/bigoted things from cashiers, fellow shoppers, people at the park, etc. Maybe I need to dye my hair pink, since there's no way on earth I'm wearing hot pants.

A. What makes you think you're allergic to copper? This is quite unusual. I only ask because I'm in the Jewelry Biz, and would like to know what metals you've tried that make you break out.

and

2. How does one make nail polish, this sound FUN!

[DistantStar]

This has been said before, but to be honestly modest you need to not stand out -- unless, of course, you look really stylish. The sort of modesty the fundies practice is the sort that says, "Look at me! I'm DIFFERENT!" It's not modest at all!

I mean, aside from wearing pants and not covering my hair, I dress pretty modestly, if boringly. For work I have to wear black pants (or a skirt, bleah) and I don't like wearing short sleeves much. I'm covered. I finally live in a climate where I can do that year-round comfortably. Even my underwear is boring.

And as I know I've said elsewhere, we get a lot of folks from Utah and therefore a lot of apparently really observant Mormons where I work, especially for a few large regular summer conferences. Yeah, capris and elbow-length sleeves to cover the garments don't usually look elegant, but they look just slightly frumpy at worst. You wouldn't pick them out of a crowd. Mission accomplished. (And yes, I know there are some Mormons who get weird about modesty. But the tourists up here are just people doing their thing.)

[ilovetchotchkes]

Yeah, I know lots of Modern Orthodox women who dress modestly (even to fundie standards - no knees, no elbows, no collarbone, hair covered when married) and who look fabulous. Modesty isn't limited to frumpers and those awful little lace headcoverings, guys. Ick.

I have an online friend who is MO, and holy cow is she AMAZINGLY stylish. Think like, Audrey Hepburn type of just fabulousness only all the parts covered that need to be for tnuzit. Best part? she MAKES a lot of her clothes. I am forever in awe of her and know she is a huge example of modest does NOT equal frumpy.

[Third]

My body rejects piercings due to the metals. I also had an issue with old style fillings and cannot get anything like an IUD, Essure, pins if I break something major etc because my body goes bonkers.

[ohpotteryourotter]

Modesty for them isn't just about not showing "unmentionables", it's about not "causing a brother to stumble". If you dress fashionably and in form-fitting clothing, they think it's immodest and will cause men to oogle.

[itsnikki05]

I definitely always believed it to he a control thing. I tend to be always cold, so even in the Summer I'll wear a light cardigan apart from on the hottest days. I do wear short dresses, but only with leggings. I just don't see why certain groups believe that you can only dress like a frump or like a streetwalker. This "modern modest" thing (apart from the poorly matched clothing) is often no different to the things I wear. Except, you know, I wear skinny jeans on occasion - shocking!

Definitely. It's all about control. Of course there is an in between of frumpy and street walker! But it seems like being attractive is a BAD thing. Whatever. LOL! (I wear longer dresses, at least past the knee, sometimes leggings with if they're shorter, cute flats or wedges, funky earrings, cardigans, and I try to come up with different ways to hold back my thick as heck growin out hair. :) I love layers. I love mix and match. I have no real style. I do wear jeans but it seems dresses are just more comfortable... I'm fairly conservative in the way I dress... no boobies, no butt... lol! I'm not opposed to showing my knees though. I'm short, and knee length or JUST below the knee looks best on me. Shortie over here! ROFL

:) Whatever. People can wear what they want, obviously. But it's nice to see that people know the difference between frumpy and modest. LOL

[itsnikki05]

A. What makes you think you're allergic to copper? This is quite unusual. I only ask because I'm in the Jewelry Biz, and would like to know what metals you've tried that make you break out.

and

2. How does one make nail polish, this sound FUN!

K... I'm wondering if you can answer me, being in the jewelry biz. :) My earrings are making my ears... act funky. They hurt my ears, and I can't wear them long. I LOVE my earrings, I don't want to give them up!! :(

Also... I wanna make nail polish too! It's kind of an obsession for me!

[Petronella7]

I don't even like calling the fundies' dresses "Little House" style, because in fact women in the 19th century did NOT dress like these modern fundies! Look at old photographs, read descriptions of clothes, look at women's magazines of the time. Dresses were well-fitted, usually with intricate details and skilful stitching, shoes were smart button-up leather boots, hair was painstakingly styled and hats were just as fashion-informed as dresses. Not to mention, clothes were designed to be worn over corsets...a garment which would enhance a woman's curves and make her shape MORE noticeable to men! While a woman working at home or on the farm might be dressed more simply, might wear an older skirt or blouse, might even go barefoot if the weather was hot and only family was around, all women except actual homeless beggars would have at least one decent dress and hat to wear in public.

Compare this standard of dress to that of the fundies we read here. Shapeless, waist-less frumpers and cardigans? Cheap white sneakers with long, clumsy skirts? Polyester triangles of lace on the back of the head? Long, frizzy, unkempt hair? All of these fashion "choices" would have looked just as outlandish to the average woman in 1880 as they do to us today.

The standards of dress that these modern fundies espouse are unlike anything seen before. In no other society have women been enjoined to take NO pride in their appearance whatsoever...to look, not just covered, but actively ugly, awkward, and undignified. Like so much else they believe in, their clothing and grooming has little to do with modesty and everything to do with cultural illiteracy, lack of taste, and just general cluelessness.

[lawfulevil]

A. What makes you think you're allergic to copper? This is quite unusual. I only ask because I'm in the Jewelry Biz, and would like to know what metals you've tried that make you break out.

and

2. How does one make nail polish, this sound FUN!

1. I react to karat gold (10 and 14, never tried 18) and sterling silver. The reaction on surface skin is kind of unfortunate (scaliness and eventual infection) and last time I tried putting earrings in, my lobes were three times normal size and oozing pus in 5 minutes. "White" gold I can wear but if I don't maintain it (ie, keep up with the plating), the same thing will happen eventually. Fine silver doesn't cause a reaction. Don't know about platinum, it's out of my price range, but palladium doesn't cause any reaction. I don't have a nickel allergy, oddly, so stainless steel "body jewelry" works out fine, unless it's contaminated with copper.

It's a shame, I developed the allergy as an adult, so I have quite a bit of silver jewelry I made that I can't wear anymore.

The reaction is obvious and severe enough my gyno said she didn't have any IUDs that'd work for me, since Mirena gave me migraines. I'm on Implanon instead.

I can handle money, it takes prolonged exposure on surface skin (just not in piercings).

As for unusual immune system reactions- I'm allergic to things almost nobody else has to worry about (cinnamon) and completely immune to common allergens (poison ivy is an allergic reaction, not that I roll around in it on purpose). Novocaine barely works on me (my dentist hates me), Sudafed might as well be meth, dipenhydramine simply doesn't work, and every belladonna alkaloid I've ever been exposed to has caused an.... unusual reaction. The only normal things I'm allergic to are crayfish and bermuda grass.

I think I might be a space alien.

2. There're a few different answers to this. The easiest and most common is that people combine nail polish colors and often their unwanted mineral makeup to make new colors, it's called frankenpolish. However, you can start from scratch by buying nail polish base and mica (exactly the same as mica you'd use to make your own eyeshadow/etc) or glitter.

If you really want to get wild and crazy, you get a cheap coffee grinder (bladed, not burred, check goodwill/garage sales) and buy cheap mica-based makeup from Big Lots or Grocery Outlet or whatnot. You need a grinder to ensure matte powders will mix into the polish, too, since they're matte because they're ground finer. Anything you can put on your eyes, you can grind up into pigment for nail polish. The sky is pretty much the limit on what you can put in nail polish, as long as it's not toxic or harmful once suspended. Automotive glitter is pretty popular.

I'm not going to tell you in this post WHERE to buy nail polish base because I think the community would prefer to keep it a semi-secret, but if you search frankenpolish you'll trip right over it in the first page of results. The company carries everything you need to get started- bottles (which come with caps and brushes), agitator beads, a variety of bases, glitter, etc. They also carry things to make lipstick, bath products, soap, and mineral makeup. Some of it you can find cheaper at more traditional bath/soap suppliers like Brambleberry, so I suggest comparison shopping.

Buy some of those plastic syringes (it is SO hard to get polish into teeny little bottles without them), and mix color as powder, NOT directly into the base. You can't mix glitter and mica in the same polish, unless the particle sizes are VERY similar. If you smear some of the powder thickly on the back of your hand, that's more or less what it'll look like as polish. Always make a test bottle before making more. If you decide to sell some of your creations, pick up some fake nails to paint for photographing- changing polish all the time will wreck your real nails. You can get 500 for $9ish, and a little double-stick tape will do the job long enough to take pictures.

Any crafty people (artists, knitters, photographers, soapmakers, whatever you do) looking for a brand new audience to sell to (since Etsy is crammed with resellers now, like eBay), PM me.

[lawfulevil]

Oh, here's one of my creations in a bottle style available from them:

I do not work for this company in any capacity, I've just ordered from them a few times now and I like their products.

Now everyone can really PERFECT their Pedicure Maneuver!