SAHD blog- the Boyer sisters

[Kariina]

Even though I intellectually understand their impulse to constantly overembellish the meaning behind every little thing they do, Jessica's haircut post grates on me.

I think she looks good and the photographs are well composed. I don't object to prose. But that post makes me cringe.

[Mommit]

It's an overwrought, self-absorbed, and cringeworthy post! As to the spelling errors (of which there are several), Jessica mentioned in a previous post that Brigid was the proofreader of the group.

I found this little paragraph particularly odd:

"Hit pause. Chop everything up in that paragraph like so much lettuce, and put it in a salad, please. I’ll eat it later. Here’s how the real story goes:"

Is that some kind of expression that I'm not aware of? Anyway, yes, it would be nice if all of our problems were solved with a new 'do!

[Kariina]

56 minutes ago, Mommit said:

It's an overwrought, self-absorbed, and cringeworthy post! As to the spelling errors (of which there are several), Jessica mentioned in a previous post that Brigid was the proofreader of the group.

I found this little paragraph particularly odd:

"Hit pause. Chop everything up in that paragraph like so much lettuce, and put it in a salad, please. I’ll eat it later. Here’s how the real story goes:"

Is that some kind of expression that I'm not aware of? Anyway, yes, it would be nice if all of our problems were solved with a new 'do!

I think she made it up. It could apply to the whole thing.

These girls*. Just...oy.

*Girl and women!!!!

[Showtunesgirl]

3 hours ago, Pianokeeper said:

How do you misspell Elizabeth Taylor's name? Twice?! While linking to information about her??11eleventy!1

Sheesh.

Not to mention "Bananna Rebublic"...those aren't even real words!! Jessica, I would like to introduce you to this tool called "spell check".....

[Lurky]

@FormerlyFundyLite I take your point, and of course I think everyone assumes they do things like work on the blog and their father's business, and of course go shopping, go to the town, the library, hang out with friends from church etc etc - I don't think anyone thinks they're physically cloistered in the home.

I can never take 6 hours a week work in some months of the year seriously as a real job, personally - that's a side-job, to me, for pin money - but do you think they are actually doing things like volunteering, formal education, other paid work that's not connected to the home businesses etc etc, that they're not showing us?  I'm genuinely interested, because from the evidence they give us, they do have a sheltered life without the outside interests/interactions that most people, especially a 21/22 year old woman, would have.  And if they did have a wider life than they project, why would they hide that?  I'm thinking of their incredibly dull "day in the life of..." video, for example - either that's the average day, or they're making a conscious effort to portray themselves that way.

(I think the performing took a lot of work to make happen - planning the events, they seem to have tried to get songs specific to the events, practicing, of course - I think that must have taken a huge amount of time, and brought them into contact with a wide range of people, but that stopped, abruptly, and there doesn't seem to have been anything to replace it.  I would love for Jessica and Charlotte to tell us how that feels, because it's been so much of their life, for so long, and I still don't quite understand why they couldn't continue as a duo - I hope they stopped because they actively wanted to)

[FormerlyFundyLite]

2 hours ago, Lurky said:

but do you think they are actually doing things like volunteering, formal education, other paid work that's not connected to the home businesses etc etc, that they're not showing us? 

Volunteering? Probably. It might not be of the "I'm on the volunteer roll at the VA and every Tuesday at noon, I go and cover the phones and file papers" type of volunteering, but I bet they're doing more of the informal "visit elderly neighbors," "babysit for free," "volunteer for the local church rummage sale," "host the neighborhood girls for tea once a month" kind of volunteering than they let on. Actually, now that I think of it, I wonder if they ever did any bell-ringing. Those ladies could have brought in a ton of cash for the Salvation Army if they put on their cutest vintage holiday-attire and sang Christmas carols at the local mall or shopping plaza.

Formal education? I doubt it--Charlotte's done with school. I am of the opinion that homeschool can be (shouldn't always be, but can be--considered a formal education (I went to good, solid public schools all the way through, for the record). I doubt any of the girls are doing CollegeMinus or any community college courses. Honestly, though, this one doesn't bother me that much. I'm a big proponent of lifelong learning and self-education, and I didn't learn that much that actually matters at University. I've learned a ton since I graduated, however: finance, politics/civics, health/nutrition/fitness, world events, culture, how to study (that's right, I didn't learn how to properly study until after my formal schooling was finished--fail!), various business topics, etc..

Other paid work? Agree to disagree here...6 hours a week isn't a lot, sure, and she definitely couldn't support herself on it, but the fact is that Jessica is paid to work outside the home. And although it's never explicitly stated, I believe that the money Jessica earns is hers to keep and spend as she chooses. Bridget also ran her own (very small) business, and I believe she also kept the profits for herself. I never got the impression that they hand any of their personal income over to Daddy Boyle. The singing group may be another story, as I bet Daddy Boyle is considered the group's manager, and thus entitled to a cut (or giant honking chunk, as the case may be). As for social interaction--they're public figures. Even if a lot of the interaction is semi-controlled, you can only control so much. They danced with complete strangers, they talked with actual war veterans about actual war, etc.

As for the gap that the end of performing brought, the family's been busy/stressed with wedding prep and the subsequent changes it's brought to family life (Jessica has made that pretty clear), so I'm not surprised they haven't jumped into another activity to take the place of the singing group yet, but I do hope they find something soon.

I'm not defending the family's lifestyle, and I think 100% that the sisters should be truly free to pursue the lives they each desire. I just prefer to be cautious about making assumptions about the overall misery (or ecstasy) of somebody's life based on a blog that obviously only covers a slice of their life. The ladies seem to be allowed some interaction with others of differing viewpoints online if not also in real life, and also to grow in their beliefs and opinions and lifestyle choices--I'll give them time and space to do so.

As I mentioned before, from 17-25, I was not-that-different from Jessica. I wanted to be a SAHD until Prince Charming rode along and swept me up (this is not something I learned from my family, I got into this thinking even with my trusty public education!), I admired the Botkins and the YLCF girls, thought the Vision Forum store was neat (DPIAT!), swore by Josh Harris and the Mahaney sisters, and I was perfectly happy and content with this lifestyle. I got "kicked out" of my parents' home at 23 (told to get a job and get my own place). I can no longer imagine I'd be happy to still be living at home with no independence in my 30s, and I no longer follow any of my former fundy influencers (except to help me de-fundify). Instead, I'm now working hard to be financially independent (not just able to pay my own way--which I've done since I left home, but truly financially independent) in my own right and learning to truly listen to others without judgment. People change.

[This is way too long! Moving on with life now, hope this clears things up for you!]

[tropaka]

Have we talked about this person before?  Some of her tweets about "white culture" ended up in my thread:

 

https://nordicsunrise.wordpress.com/about/

 

Quote

“To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.” Titus 2:5

We have an epidemic in the Western world right now. In America and Europe citizens have become self obsessed, lazy, fat, demanding, spoiled, loud, controlling, egotistical and mentally ill. Feminism, homosexuality, atheism, hedonism, and transgender-ism are being promoted while the hard work and priorities of family and faith have all but died away and this pattern is killing us, physically and spiritually.

The aim of this online magazine is to support the revolution of radical traditionalism.

 Whether found in protestant gatherings, Catholic traditions, the tea-party, Trump supporters, Mormon families, Amish barn raisings, Old Order or Conservative Mennonites, the purity movement, the stay-at-home daughter movement, homesteading, quiver-full, patriarchy movement, the fight against Islam, traditional homemaking, the hopeful repeal of the 19th amendment, or the quest to keep our countries from being over run with migrants and illegal aliens, etc, we will explore how peoples everywhere are saying yes to hard work, yes to big families, yes to the Lord and His plan for our families and our future. 

“But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel.” 1 Timothy 5:8

 

 

[FormerlyFundyLite]

On 11/16/2016 at 5:27 PM, tropaka said:

Have we talked about this person before?  Some of her tweets about "white culture" ended up in my thread:

 

https://nordicsunrise.wordpress.com/about/

 

 

This came up in the Boyer Sisters thread a few weeks ago. Starts here-ish:

 

[PopRox]

I'm reading through the blog right now-- my first impression is that somebody read the Jennifer Mayers blog ("An Elegant Life"/an obvious fake) and decided to do something similar but tone it WAY down. Of course, I'm probably being a cock-eyed optimist in that... sadly, there are people that really DO think that way; and that's why Trump is our president- elect*.

*Typing that out actually hurt. 

[PopRox]

NVM. The more I read, the less convinced I am that this is an elaborate Poe. Ugh, ugh, ugh.

[Sobeknofret]

On 11/14/2016 at 0:13 PM, Palimpsest said:

I'll agree that she came over as very selfish and self-absorbed in that post.  If you take out the God-speak she sounded a bit like a teenager who is utterly convinced that her life is over because the boy she had a crush on didn't ask her to the prom but her sister got a date instead.

I don't think she is necessarily a horrible person though.  Like a lot of these young women, she comes over as stunted emotionally and extremely immature for her age.  She's only 21 or 22 with very little life experience and has been raised to believe that marriage is her only goal.  She's also been raised to believe that if she does all the "right" things as a Godly maiden and Daughter of the King then her life will always be happy, happy, joy, joy.  

Levi's defection pulled the rug right from under her naive, inexperienced, and self-righteous little feet.  I cut her a break for that and hope she can put herself back together - and broaden her horizons a bit.

 

I felt the same way. There was a sense of *desperation* in her post; desperation in the sense of  "my life isn't going the way I think it should be going, and I have no idea what I'm supposed to do next, please help me!" Lost and confused, rather than a bad person kind of vibe here. Frightened a little, even. 

[Palimpsest]

6 hours ago, FormerlyFundyLite said:

As I mentioned before, from 17-25, I was not-that-different from Jessica. I wanted to be a SAHD until Prince Charming rode along and swept me up (this is not something I learned from my family, I got into this thinking even with my trusty public education!), I admired the Botkins and the YLCF girls, thought the Vision Forum store was neat (DPIAT!), swore by Josh Harris and the Mahaney sisters, and I was perfectly happy and content with this lifestyle. I got "kicked out" of my parents' home at 23 (told to get a job and get my own place). I can no longer imagine I'd be happy to still be living at home with no independence in my 30s, and I no longer follow any of my former fundy influencers (except to help me de-fundify). Instead, I'm now working hard to be financially independent (not just able to pay my own way--which I've done since I left home, but truly financially independent) in my own right and learning to truly listen to others without judgment. People change.

Thanks for sharing this.  Good luck and good wishes to you.

And, thank the FSM that your family finally "kicked you out."  The SAHD thing really is an awfully unhealthy mindset.

Jessica is in an unhealthy mindset too.  Rather than defending her (although I understand why you are doing that) you should be also advocating for change.  Six hours a week in "paid employment" at an organic flower farm isn't enough to support herself.

People can change.  I honestly think that both Jessica and Charlotte need a swift kick to the rear.  Enough of waiting for Prince Charming - who may have feet of clay.

If they miss singing so much, then start up again as a duo.  They can change their minds - and a pledge they made as the "Boyer Sisters" trio when they were all teens to stop singing when one of them got married can be broken.

I want both Jessica and Charlotte to reach out.  They have talents and should try to use them as individuals.  Not as the enmeshed "Boyer Sisters."

[charmedforsure]

HOMG.

The song is Talia's Theme by Two Steps From Hell (a composing duo that make music for movie trailers). Interesting choice, no? 

Gabe sure is a peacock.

[FreeMiriam]

Brigid looks deliberately plain, as if she didn't want to be the center of attention during her own wedding. She almost blends in the background. I'm still not a fan of the dress (or those white tights) but at least the skirt looked good when she was dancing.

[Flossie]

I know nothing about these people, but I liked the dance.  I suppose it's too much to hope that they get into ballroom dancing together?

[Palimpsest]

That was nicely choreographed.  Brigid is very graceful.  There was a moment when I thought we were going to get a real Dirty Dancing style lift and was disappointed.  I don't mind her dress but I wish it was a couple of inches longer.  It is also crying out for a belt to show off her tiny waist.

I think this person from the comments was quite shocked by the fancy dress and that they were dancing at all.

Quote

what kind of dance is this? also, what kind of tradition is it to dance and wear a particular attire for a dance? I am really curious to know!

It was a waltz.  Dancing and wearing "particular attire" is very common in many cultures.  In this case the groom was wearing a kilt.   And a really long sporran.  He seems to think he's Scottish.

 

 

[charmedforsure]

After watching the dance a few more times (it's like watching a house set on fire... a bit mesmerizing and scary at the same time), they look genuinely happy at the end of the dance, infinitely more so than that somber wedding photo that was released on social media. Plus, with the fact that it's a choreographed number, it means they had to practice being close and with their hands on each other for more than just a single hourly session at the local Fred Astaire dance studio. Breakin' down those courtship walls... woo!

If one of the sisters replies with the song title (I just Shazamed it knowing it might be a while since they didn't post the song title to being with...), I would be surprised, especially given how secular the song is (it was part of the soundtrack for a sci-fi/fantasy novel written by the artists - Colin Frake on Fire Mountain).

[scozzle]

I LOVED it! I think they both looked genuinely really happy. 

[Mommit]

Finally the wedding pictures!! I didn't like Brigid's dress when I first saw it. I thought it was too plain and ill-fitting. But somehow it fit the theme of her wedding and her personality, so I can't snark on it too much. The bridesmaids dresses were very understated, too, but looked nice all together. That said, I think Gabe's bright red plaid ensemble really stuck out like a sore thumb! I'm curious to see pictures of the entire bridal party together. It looks like the groomsmen were in various kilts, too, but none as bright as Gabe's! I agree that Brigid didn't stand out as the bride, but I'm guessing that is probably her personality. Now, Jessica, on the other hand...whenever she does get married, I'm sure her gown will be huge or have a really long train with 10 little girls carrying it behind her!

Speaking of Jessica, I didn't spot Levi in any of the pictures. I had to go back and remind myself what he looks like to be sure! I don't think he was a groomsman, so that was probably a little easier for her. He may not even have been a guest, who knows.

The church was really neat and suited the theme well. It appears that the reception was there, too, which is very convenient for the guests and provided a nice backdrop for the pictures. Their first dance was sweet and did at least show off her gown. Throughout the pictures I was glad to see Gabe smiling. Brigid looked over-the-moon happy, so I'm glad for her. Regarding their first kiss, she made sure to point out that it truly was their FIRST kiss. Then she commented with "Gabe and I have gotten a lot more practice in since then. (winky emogi) She's probably pregnant already! I hope not, because she talked about the adventures they've been having together. I hope she gets to have lots of adventures before being tied down with children. I'm also curious about these adventures. Now, they may be as mundane as walking in the woods together or grocery shopping together, but I'm still curious to learn what she considers adventures!

I'm sure I'll have more comments later, but overall, it did look like a lovely wedding and seemed to suit Brigid (and Gabe's?) personalities. It looks like her dream wedding, so that's all that matters!

[Mommit]

5 hours ago, charmedforsure said:

Plus, with the fact that it's a choreographed number, it means they had to practice being close and with their hands on each other for more than just a single hourly session at the local Fred Astaire dance studio. Breakin' down those courtship walls... woo!

Oh, I'm sure that Daddy Boyer or some other suitable chaperone was in attendance of the rehearsals! Otherwise it would've been positively scandalous!

Speaking of scandals, Charlotte just had to mention their boycott of Target in yesterday's blog post:

"A while back, Mom found some very basic blue blouses at Target (this was before we started boycotting them for their restroom policy, FYI)"

Ugh, seriously? I guess I shouldn't be surprised, but I hate how they have to remind us of how they're holier than thou and so "pure"  in their thinking and beliefs. It seems very defensive, too. Also, Jessica said this in the bitterness post:

“The Huntsman: Winter’s War”. (Now please, don’t let the fact that I watched this movie distract you. I don’t watch any of the scenes with nudity in them, nor was I bothered with the fact that this movie had them. That is not my point, so let’s not dwell on that, shall we?) "

So, she closes her eyes and sticks her fingers in her ears singing "la la la la la" during the nude/love scenes? She's 21 years old for goodness sake and she can't handle a little bit of nudity in a movie?? We're not talking about an X-rated porno or anything, jeez!

Oh, one other funny thing in the bitterness post:

"He bent me over backwards and then made me face the mirror so that I could see just how twisted my own ‘fair designs’ really were. I gave up. "

She was talking about God, but the phrasing of that had me cracking up! 

[JermajestyDuggar]

Gabe is not a good dancer an his outfit was distracting. So I honestly didn't like their first dance. I guess if I had only focused on Brigid it would've been ok. I still don't like her dress although the bottom was good for twirling. 

[HereticHick]

What are those giant sporrans comepensating for?

[anachronistic]

They seem so nice. Their outfits are so pretty. But inside, they are as hateful and prejudiced as any of the other fundies we snark on. They just hide it under all that lace and poplin. 

The Boyer sisters are to me a perfect example of how people can be so good, yet so awful. I am 100% certain that they have never met a trans person in real,life, but if they did, they would be utterly astonished at the fact that LGBT people are human. They are also unable or unwilling to engage in any sort of discourse or consider changing their minds about something. Someone left a really thoughtful, considerate comment on their blog, about the target/restroom issue, and another asked them to see it from a Christian perspective, but they don't even bother to reply. They seem intelligent enough but they are lazy. They don't want to leave their bubble or do the work required to live in a modern world, like reconsidering prejudiced viewpoints. Or an update viewpoint other than the one they've been taught since birth. I honestly don't know if they even have the critical thinking skills required to do so.

I love contra/country dancing. I'd love to take them to a gender-neutral dance I go to sometimes, organized by a group of LGBTQ dancers. They would see then nobody is icky or disgusting, we are all just as normal as they are.

[Mommit]

2 minutes ago, anachronistic said:

I honestly don't know if they even have the critical thinking skills required to do so.

They've shown that they have 0 critical thinking skills. They believe everything that Daddy and/or the Church tells them. A couple of the comments about the Target boycott urged the "girls" to re-think their stance, but I doubt they will. They've been brainwashed.

[JermajestyDuggar]

So something else struck me while looking at the pics. 

Where are Brigid's friends? 

Her bridesmaids were her two sisters and two of Gabes family members. She took a pic with a ton of little girls. But where are her friends that are her age?