Defending Abusive Homeschoolers

[KitCatCadillac]

Now, I know not all people who homeschool are crazy. But yeah, some are. And I have to wonder why you'd try to defend some of these people when there is absolutely NO JUSTIFICATION for their actions. Disgusting. http://www.patheos.com/blogs/lovejoyfem ... a-her.html

*trigger warning*

[KitCatCadillac]

For those who can't click the link - the article talks about three homeschooling families who severely abused their children, some adopted, some special needs - and the Homeschool Legal Defense Association's defense of them. Horrible.

[Sobeknofret]

Many of us secular homeschoolers believe that HSLDA is actively hurting the case for homeschooling, and these cases just go to prove it. They're throwing families under the bus to protect the shibboleth of "parental rights."

[KitCatCadillac]

Many of us secular homeschoolers believe that HSLDA is actively hurting the case for homeschooling, and these cases just go to prove it. They're throwing families under the bus to protect the shibboleth of "parental rights."

Absolutely. I mean, if you're trying to make the point that homeschooling can be done well and to the benefit of children involved (and I believe it can), then you don't defend this kind of thing. You say that it's completely un-excusable and you don't want homeschooling to be associated with evil, psychopathic child abusers. You DON'T say that those people are heroes who have an absolute right to homeschool, even when the kids start dropping like flies.

[Sobeknofret]

Lots of families that you would think belong to the HSDLA, have openly stated that unless you're an evangelical Christian of the "correct" type, HSDLA is absolutely useless. And aside from a few exceptional cases, the legal challenges to homeschooling are pretty close to zip, so many believe that HSDLA has outlived it's usefulness. Despite what some people think, the government is not lurking around every corner, waiting to take your kids from you because you homeschool :roll: , so they've lept on the "parent's rights" thing in order to justify their existence and membership money.

[ILoveJellybeans]

Disgusting.

I thought it was a bit suspicious that they are against any form of regulation or child abuse laws. Normal, average homeschoolers who arent beating their children and intend to teach them to read and write would be fine with regulations because they understand that it is to protect children.

I read on there that HSLDA is protesting a law saying that child abusers shouldnt be able to homeschool, is against laws protecting children's rights not to be beaten, and has an article explaining how to beat your kids and not get them taken by CPS.

Theyre protecting child abusers and encouraging them.

They claim to be against child abuse, but where is the line drawn for these people??? How is making children sleep in cages, trying to drown them in the toilet, burning a 6 year old with bleach and not getting immediate medical attention (and seriously, three more of her siblings died under suspicious circumstances within 9 months of her death......how did these people get to keep custody of these kids, let alone be allowed to homeschool them), hit kids so heard they break bones, deprive them of food and water, not abusive???????

What do you have to do to be a child abuser in their eyes? Not be Christian?

[Salamander]

The cases described in this article were horrific.

I noticed that most (all?) of the severely abused children were adopted. Has there been some kind of research done into parental abuse rates of adopted versus biological children?

Edited for clarity.

[ILoveJellybeans]

I think with fundies, its because adopted children are incredibly likely to have mental health issues due to whatever trauma that happened in the past that meant they couldnt be with their parents. They also arent going to just accept their adoptive parents as their parents and love them, as trust takes time. Also with international adoption, you get children who dont understand English and have to adjust to a new culture, and also the standards in orphanages in some countries are awful and the kids are neglected. This means that they wont be as well behaved and obey immediately. Children who arent well behaved in fundieland get beaten. Children who do not respond to being beaten by turning into perfectly well behaved, happy children get beaten even harder because it is the only parenting tactic that fundies know. This escalates until the child dies.

[dawbs]

The cases described in this article were horrific.

I noticed that most (all?) of the severely abused children were adopted. Has there been some kind of research done into parental abuse rates of adopted versus biological children?

Edited for clarity.

I'll have to see if I can find it, but I remember a study a few years ago that said that men who sexually abused children were drastically more likely to do so if they did not believe the daughter was biologically theirs.

(of course, that gets squirrley right away. "no no, she's not my 'real' daughter; I wouldn't have raped her if she were" as a defense...)

[rollmeover]

The cases described in this article were horrific.

I noticed that most (all?) of the severely abused children were adopted. Has there been some kind of research done into parental abuse rates of adopted versus biological children?

Edited for clarity.

Those poor children.

Children are at greatest risk from non-biological parent figures like step parents, foster carers, partners of their parents and, yes, adoptive parents. Adopting a kid is hard work, emotionally and physically - the kids don't look like you, smell like you, trust you, love you, sound like you - and often act out their traumas - I can still remember finding the way my kids smelt really repugnant at first and I have had times of being cross about their behaviour and staring into their faces thinking "you look just like your birth parents and I bet you'll end up just like them". But because I'm normal I take a breath and behave normally and lovingly, and deal with my feelings like a grown up. I think adopting several older children out of birth order into larger families with strict rules, lack of knowledge about child development and adoption related trauma, and over controlling parents obsessed with sin and salvation is such a pressure cooker situation which must magnify stress and while it in NO WAY excuses these piss poor parents I think it explains why they so easily spill over into this abuse.

[2xx1xy1JD]

That was beyond disturbing.

"Good Christian" Child Abusers Defense League would be a more accurate name for the organization. It's not about homeschooling at all.

Talking about the "unfortunate deaths of 4 children" and making it seem like criminal prosecution was a horrendous ordeal for the family? WTF does that have to do with home schooling? You can be honest about the case: 4 kids died under really suspicious circumstances, and there is plenty of evidence that Hannah died in a way that was particularly painful and gruesome.

An organization which legitimately wanted to help the homeschooling cause, and gain more acceptance for it, would make the point that these people were evil, UNLIKE MOST HOMESCHOOLERS. They would want to present an image of normal, loving parents making a reasonable decision for their children and having accountability. The very last thing in the world that they would want to do is support known child abusers and their efforts to commit still more child abuse.