My Dog Isn't A Christian

[debrand]

fishwithtrish.blogspot.com/

I haven't been over to The Fish With Trish blog in a long time. Her dog, Baby has died. And while I feel bad for her loss, the poem that her pastor wrote made me realize that I have heathen dogs.

My fifteen year old Buster has never been a hundred percent obedient. Now that he can't jump up on my husband's lap, he whines until my husband sits on the floor. We joke that he taught us tricks. Because of safety issues, we don't let our dogs in the kitchen. Buster has learned to remain behind me and when I turn, he steps with me so that I can't see him. Sometimes I don't know he is there until the kids tell me.

Our other dog enjoys walking and sometimes meeting people. She is a very shy dog and puts her tail between her legs if anyone is too excited when they approach. However, once she warms up she is almost too affectionate. She is basically obedient.

This poem does not inspire me to be a Christian. No offense to any Christians but it makes me happy that I'm an atheist.

The underlined part makes it sound as if the writer wants Christians to be obedient to their pastor not god.

She was like we should be

as Christians faithfully-

following our master always ready

to give an answer to those who ask

to share the good news is a joyful task

Baby was always ready to follow Trish

it was her only wish to server her master

as she went out to fish.

She wore her custom made vest with pride

all sorts of tracts and DVDs stuffed inside

and she always had a smile on her face

as she with her master tried to keep pace

her feet were ready to bring good news

the time was always right- she would never refuse

to follow her master, whether day or night

she never was fearful, never controlled by fright

because in her master was her full trust and faith

and this she demonstrated by her happy face

she was never downcast- never made an excuse

always ready to go, always ready to be used.

So when you are tired, and don't feel like going

or when you are fearful, and don't feel like sowing

Just remember Baby, and how she always was ready to go

till the day of her death, because she didn't know.

All she knew was how to follow and obey

she didn't say "wait- I have to pray"

about this task Christians are all commanded to do

she was willing to be used by her master- and so should you

Trust in the power of Jesus to see you through

as you obey Him, out of love serve Him, and GO!

to seek and save the lost like your Master did.

[Sinister Rouge]

Your dogs must be Humanists, like Darwin! http://little.kidswithoutgod.com/

My dog is a humanist too. He sins with his teddy bears all. the. time.

[debrand]

Your dogs must be Humanists, like Darwin! http://little.kidswithoutgod.com/

My dog is a humanist too. He sins with his teddy bears all. the. time.

Even though he was neutered, Buster used to try and ride our former cat. Sometimes he would soak her ears by licking them. I guess they had some interspecies love going on. She liked to feed Buster and would knock food down to him from high places. My pets are probably not only Humanist but support marriage between dogs and cats.

[ILoveJellybeans]

Dogs cant have religions, theyre not able to understand the concept of God. Although then again, neither can toddlers, but fundies still insist theirs are Christian and totally understand it all.

[latraviata]

Dogs cant have religions, theyre not able to understand the concept of God. Although then again, neither can toddlers, but fundies still insist theirs are Christian and totally understand it all.

CULGslK2vrw

[Black Aliss]

Even though he was neutered, Buster used to try and ride our former cat. Sometimes he would soak her ears by licking them. I guess they had some interspecies love going on. She liked to feed Buster and would knock food down to him from high places. My pets are probably not only Humanist but support marriage between dogs and cats.

My dog might be a fundie. She's very obedient, unless she thinks no one is watching and then she's a total hypocrite. She also humps the cat whenever the cat acts up. She knows nothing of humping for sex, only humping as an act of dominance.

[Minerva]

My dog isn't Christian. He's very rebellious. Won't do a thing I ask him unless there's food involved, and I swear he gives me a snotty look right before he disobeys me.

[Arete]

We think my sister's dog is gay. He has dog buddies who sleep over when their humans need to go out of town. While he is kind to some of the females, he sleeps with the boy dogs. In. the. same. dogbed. There is definitely a bromance going with the one particular husky.

He is probably a pantheist, as he does worship and make offerings at several trees and even a rock outcropping.

[Guest Anonymous]

My cat is definitely not Christian. Charlie is a devotee of Bast, the cat goddess.

[wild little fox]

My cat is definitely not Christian. Charlie is a devotee of Bast, the cat goddess.

As are all cats :) I'm just Shadow's servant.

[ADoyle90815]

We think my sister's dog is gay. He has dog buddies who sleep over when their humans need to go out of town. While he is kind to some of the females, he sleeps with the boy dogs. In. the. same. dogbed. There is definitely a bromance going with the one particular husky.

He is probably a pantheist, as he does worship and make offerings at several trees and even a rock outcropping.

My ex had a dog that was gay, actually he adopted this dog and another one from a friend who was moving somewhere where he couldn't have pets. I say that dog was gay because he wasn't interested in the female dogs he had, but was more interested in the male dog. One of the female dogs hadn't been spayed yet, but she was able to be spayed without producing a litter first.

[kiwimusume]

My cat could be held up by fundies as an example of the whole getting obedience through fear thing. :( For a while my sister hated him (admittedly he had been a dick to our old, senile cat) and hissed at him whenever she saw him. So with me he'd always try to get inside when he knew he wasn't allowed in, but as soon as he saw my sister he'd bolt back outside.

[RosyDaisy]

WTF? Animals know shit about religion. My feline headship does as he damn well pleases and obeys nobody. :animals-cat:

[Buzzard]

Baby was always ready to follow Trish

it was her only wish to server her master

as she went out to fish.

:?:

So the dog is serving her master who is a human like a good christian? Isnt that worshiping a false god or something?

[PennySycamore]

I am just imagining all these dogs and cats with Marguerite Perrin screaming at them "YOUR DOG IS NOT A CHRISTIAN! HE'S DARKSIDED! HE'S A SLYKICK"

For those who don't know, Marguerite Perrin was the extremely evangelical mom on Trading Spouses. She swapped places with a New Age mom from Massachusetts. She accused the Massachusetts mom of not being a Christian, which was probably true and also of being a "slykick" or psychic as, IIRC she was an on-air astrologer for a radio station in Massachusetts

[Minerva]

I am just imagining all these dogs and cats with Marguerite Perrin screaming at them "YOUR DOG IS NOT A CHRISTIAN! HE'S DARKSIDED! HE'S A SLYKICK"

For those who don't know, Marguerite Perrin was the extremely evangelical mom on Trading Spouses. She swapped places with a New Age mom from Massachusetts. She accused the Massachusetts mom of not being a Christian, which was probably true and also of being a "slykick" or psychic as, IIRC she was an on-air astrologer for a radio station in Massachusetts

Was she the GOD WARRIOR!!! ?

[Deleted07]

so erm, may I show this Jesus dog butt?

[PennySycamore]

Was she the GOD WARRIOR!!! ?

Yep, Marguerite was the GOD WARRIOR!

Trading Spouses differed from WIfe Swap in that each traded spouse was given $30K to $50K to allocate to the other family. They decided what the family needed to spend the money on the most. Marguerite initially tore her check up because it was tainted, but, in the end, decided to take it. There were some funds for one of her daughters to set up a dance studio and money for Marguerite to have gastric bypass surgery along with other things. I think that the daughter who was given the money to set up a dance studio was killed in a car wreck later. You could tell that her family was rather embarrassed by her God Warrior antics.

[teddybear]

I tried to baptize my cats, wanna see the scars? Actually, when I was about to be ordained a deacon and would be allowed to do baptisms, instead of practicing on a doll, I did use my cats. I figured if I would handle something with claws, I could handle any baby that came along. LOL

And my older cat, Butch, is a lesbian. I bought her for breeding, but it turned out she hates male cats with a passion. When she was in heat, she kept trying to get the female cats she lived with to do the nasty with her, without success. I tried several times to breed her, with different males, but no luck with any. She preferred her girl friends. Even now, she will have nothing to do with a male cat. I had a neutered male cat for several years, she hated him from the day he came in the door until the day he died. I got a new female cat, they were best friends in just a few days.

[miffy]

I know know what religion my cat is. She is currently sleeping on her back in 'her' chair infront of the fan with her fat tummy on display. So I guess she has a lot in common with Smuggar.

[DistantStar]

My cat is the focus of her own religion! Or so she tells me when I am ordered to worship.

[luckylibrarian]

My dog Sasha definitely isn't fundie. She doesn't believe in submitting to a male headship (or a female headship, for that matter.). She's a true stubborn Great Pyr who only listens when she feels like it or if it involves food.

[jjmennonite]

My 2nd dog is a Chihuahua. I believe that is a form of Christian. It is obvious they share the same first 2 letters.

My first dog is a Terrierist. Most Terrier owners/servents will relate.

This is all very logical, like religion.

[PennySycamore]

My 2nd dog is a Chihuahua. I believe that is a form of Christian. It is obvious they share the same first 2 letters.

My first dog is a Terrierist. Most Terrier owners/servents will relate.

This is all very logical, like religion.

I have a Terrierist, too. My Shih-tzu is a Confucianist and Buddhist which is typical of Chinese dogs and my Dachshund is, I believe, a nihilist.

[ShadowyOne]

My beagle is a Deist. He believes in a creator force, but doesn't think it has anything to do with his day-to-day life.