My stroke turned me gay - (BBC1 Documentary)

[Guest Anonymous]

http://www.pinknews.co.uk/2012/04/17/do ... s-tonight/

 

I'm interested to see this documentary tonight. There aren't many reports or reviews that aren't by the Daily Mail.

 

Briefly, the 27-year old man woke up from a stroke in 2011, and reported that the stroke had 'turned him gay'. He gave up his former Rugby-playing, beer-swilling 'lifestyle', trained in hairdressing and became engaged to another man, say the sensationalist tabloids. (Because rugby=straight and hairdressing=gay, apparently).

 

His partner believes that he must always have been gay. Some medics think there may be medical evidence to support the man's own view that the stroke changed his sexual orietation. Many others think the stroke jolted him into realising that he only has one life, and deciding to embrace who he has always been.

 

I seem to have missed this making the news earlier, and am interested to see the programme. The man lives in an area where I used to work, so my own prejudices are quite strong.... I do not find it hard to imagine anyone "choosing a straight lifestyle" in that particularly antiquated neck of the woods.

[ElphabaGalinda]

I find it strange that he had to give up Rugby and beer-swilling to become gay. And becoming a hairdresser does not = becoming gay. So even if it were possible to "turn gay" from a stroke, I highly doubt that would also change someone's job and lifestyle. He was probably always gay. Maybe he feared he would die so he decided to live true to himself.

[Guest Anonymous]

In case it went unnoticed, I was being ironic with the hairdresser=gay comment. :)

I'm interested to see the programme because I have heard/read nothing from a decent source.

It is reasonably common for people to change personality characteristics after a stroke, so my own supposition is that it was his personality that changed so that he lost his frightened, closeted tendency and 'became' more open/confident about who he was.

Apparently he has forgotten a lot from before the stroke... maybe he forgot quite how narrow-minded and bigoted some of his neighbours are, for long enough to establish a new life for himself.

[spragger]

I know some parts of the brain control our perception of "fear," real or imagined. I wonder if that got damaged. Maybe that was the reason behind his willingness to come out of the closet/realization that he is gay. I guess it would be a convenient excuse if you felt you needed something to blame. My guess is that his partner is right and he just never realized it. A major life change like that would cause you to ask a lot of questions about who you are. Maybe he had always secretly wanted to be a hairdresser, but thought he would get made fun of for it as a straight rugby player?

[fundifugee]

What, you have to give up rugby to be gay? Don't tell this guy, or the numerous gay rugby teams all over the world...

[Guest Anonymous]

Any Brits watching?

It's fascinating and quite sad so far. The man concerned has no real memory of his pre-stroke life. His mother apparently cared for him post-stroke until he came out as gay. He seems genuinely to believe that there was an 'old' Chris that has been placed by a 'new' one and is talking with a kind of understanding about his mother's 'grief' about him being gay.

It is so sad, it is almost like a parody of real life. Given the setting in the Welsh Valleys, his accent, and the very sad way things have turned out for him with his 'old' family, it seems like it could almost be scripted by Rob Brydon.... shit, his voice and mannerisms are so Rob Brydon.

Watching it, I have no doubt at all that he is convinced by his understanding of the situation, ie that it is all down to the stroke.

[Guest Anonymous]

I'm kind of embarrassed that the programme is showing up how ignorant so many of the people round here are about issues around sexual orientation.

[Guest Anonymous]

And now I'm annoyed by the psychological testing... he has severe memory loss and they are working from a self-report questionnaire about the childhood he barely remembers....

It sounds as though he actually isn't disagreeing that he could have been born gay and everyone is getting caught up in semantics. He seems to be reasonably just fucked off with the intrusion into his life. He doesn't seem to have had any time to himself to reflect, and think things through on his own. He needed to move away from his mother who was unsupportive, and start a new career in a new home. I'm surprised he has had time to take a piss, let alone come to terms emotionally or psychologically with all that has happened.

[Guest Anonymous]

And now a doctor is wheeled on who assures him that sexual orientation is a part of one's personality and so can change in the same way that interests can change....

The science is very poor and the programme feels at least mildly exploitative. No-one seems to have talked about how his recovery will likely continue, his life may take him into contact with new and old people who will cause him to see things from ever differing perspectives.

Above all, I just feel very warm towards him, and very sad that he has needed to go on a tv 'journey' because his family and friends can't accept him as he is. He seems to have been a nice guy before and is certainly a lovely guy afterwards.

[fundifugee]

Blog post about gentleman in question:

[link=]http://sharpsingle.com/tag/gay-2/[/link]

Beware, nekkid rugby players photo!

Poor, poor sod. He goes through all that pain and sorrow, those long uncomfortable nights in hospital, the operations and the bed-baths. Then he wakes up and he’s still Welsh.

Breaks your heart.

[Guest Anonymous]

Blog post about gentleman in question:

[link=]http://sharpsingle.com/tag/gay-2/[/link]

Beware, nekkid rugby players photo!

Er, he didn't break his neck or undergo any operations; he had a stroke not a spinal injury. It sounds like a 'joke' he took from elsewhere that doesn't really fit the situation at all.

[CanadianHippie]

Er, he didn't break his neck or undergo any operations; he had a stroke not a spinal injury. It sounds like a 'joke' he took from elsewhere that doesn't really fit the situation at all.

Broken neck doesn't = spinal injury. It can cause a spinal injury, but it doesn't have to. It can also cause swelling or damage that cuts of the blood supply to the brain causing a stroke which likely resulted in at least temporary paralysis. I have no comment about operations, but aside from the link in the OP all other sources I've found mention a broken neck as well.

[fundifugee]

Yup, vertebral artery dissection, the sort of stroke that can be caused by neck injuries, or, rarely, by chiropractic neck manipulation.

[Guest Anonymous]

Broken neck doesn't = spinal injury. It can cause a spinal injury, but it doesn't have to. It can also cause swelling or damage that cuts of the blood supply to the brain causing a stroke which likely resulted in at least temporary paralysis. I have no comment about operations, but aside from the link in the OP all other sources I've found mention a broken neck as well.

OK. I was referring to the rather trite blog entry, trying to get a laugh out of misinformation. I see that the Daily Mail (that oh-so-reputable tabloid from which other news sources seem to have taken the story) actually does report a broken neck from "doing a back flip to impress his friends". I don't know where that comes from but it wasn't documented on the TV programme, on which, the man described himself as having done two forward rolls down a small banking (he was standing on the banking at the time he said it) - he said his friends did one forward roll with him, and then he did a further one, and he was incredulously referring to such a small thing that changed his life. He was then taken care of by his mother for a couple of months before moving out to start his life on his own, No operations, no paralysis beyond the left-side of his body 'drooping' in the common way following stroke injury, from what was shown.

[PennySycamore]

Strokes can change a survivor's personality, but I'll bet that guy was gay to begin with. He may not have been honest with himself beforehand though.