Fundamentalists That Have Children On The Spectrum

[luv2laugh]

I am interested in how certain Fundamentalist Believers deal with having a son or daughter on the spectrum. I know some don't believe that they should seek help for it and others do.

[emmiedahl]

I'm not terribly familiar with the extended Maxwell family. Is Abby showing signs? If so, what are you seeing? I am interested in how it would be dealt with in that community. I've known a few evangelical homeschooling families that have a child on the spectrum. Some really impress me, but I can think of a few that are basically trying to cure the disorder (unsuccessfully) through prayer intervention and child training.

[fundiefan]

I am really confused about where that question comes from? Do you ask it of/about every child just out of curiosity?

To be honest, I find it odd and entirely out of place.

[Beeks]

I'm also curious about what made you ask

[luckylibrarian]

Is Abby Nathan and Melanie's older daughter? Isn't she about two years old? I'd like to know what makes you think she is autistic. She isn't discussed often enough on the blog for me to make a guess one way or the other.

[Beeks]

Is Abby Nathan and Melanie's older daughter? Isn't she about two years old? I'd like to know what makes you think she is autistic. She isn't discussed often enough on the blog for me to make a guess one way or the other.

Yes, and just from the pics of her she's often looking straight at the camera and grinning, and in at least one she's playing with a baby doll. She looks like a normal toddler to me.

[contrary]

is she really 2?

if so, i can personally vouch for the fact that all two year olds are insane.

[fundiefan]

is she really 2?

if so, i can personally vouch for the fact that all two year olds are insane.

I think anyone who has spent any time with a two year old can vouch for that.

All that learning and development and awareness has got to make one short circuit.

But, I think that's the point?

I'm still really confused about what inspired/motivated the question in the first place.

[kpmom]

Add me to "why would you ask this question?". The little we've seen of her, she seems to be a typically developing toddler.

Or do you mean, "What would the Maxwells, or any fundy family do with a child with autism?".

[bekkah]

I find asking if a child is autistic incredibly rude because without meeting a child and spending time with them, there is no way you can diagnosis a child over the net. If she's holding a baby doll in pics that probably means she is not on the spectrum but without watching what she does with the doll there is no way to tell and there is no reason to post the question.

[oolong]

is she really 2?

if so, i can personally vouch for the fact that all two year olds are insane.

No, I think she is more like 4. See Sarah's post about Abby starting chore packs. She doesn't look 2 and I doubt a 2-year-old could do those chores, even in a family like this.

[fundiefan]

No, I think she is more like 4. See Sarah's post about Abby starting chore packs. She doesn't look 2 and I doubt a 2-year-old could do those chores, even in a family like this.

2, 4, 6, 8, 10 or anything else...what inspires and motivates the question in the first place.

I'm no fundie fan and am more than willing to to question most of what they do, especially when they create a blog and lifestyle around it...but, what makes someone ask on a snark board if a child is autistic?

[amie]

..........

[fundiefan]

So, her age has been confirmed.

I still don't get what any of it has to do with anything.

Aren't kids off limits? A 2-3-4-12 year old has no choice in their life. I don't get the initial question and I don't get how it could even be open for discussion. How can that child be open for discussion?

I don't think mods need to be babysitters, but I do think this entire thread needs to be removed and not allowed in the future. It is exposing an innocent child, end of story.

And let's not forget that the original post had zero basis for asking other than 'curiosity'. No basis for anything.

I'm personally appalled that someone, anyone, even thought it was/is appropriate.

[Beeks]

So, her age has been confirmed.

I still don't get what any of it has to do with anything.

Aren't kids off limits? A 2-3-4-12 year old has no choice in their life. I don't get the initial question and I don't get how it could even be open for discussion. How can that child be open for discussion?

I don't think mods need to be babysitters, but I do think this entire thread needs to be removed and not allowed in the future. It is exposing an innocent child, end of story.

And let's not forget that the original post had zero basis for asking other than 'curiosity'. No basis for anything.

I'm personally appalled that someone, anyone, even thought it was/is appropriate.

Well, asking if a child has autism isn't necessarily snarking or negative...but I would like to hear more from the OP.

[fundiefan]

Then I guess I will ask, and expect reasonable answers...are you on the spectrum? luv2laugh, are you autistic? Are your children on the spectrum? Do your children have mental/emotional/developmental issues?

I'm only asking out of curiosity.

Wrong.

[Beeks]

Then I guess I will ask, and expect reasonable answers...are you on the spectrum? luv2laugh, are you autistic? Are your children on the spectrum? Do your children have mental/emotional/developmental issues?

I'm only asking out of curiosity.

Wrong.

I do have a child with developmental delays and I can assure you it isn't the end of the world. It's odd to me that you think it's SO AWFUL to ask. Maybe it says something about how you feel about children who have Autism?

[maybeizfundie]

I don't know about the Maxwell's and others.

I know some fundies personally who consider autism a fad diagnosis and chalk it up to poor discipline.

I know some fundies personally who have children on the spectrum and are busting their butts to get their children the support they need, including having the child in public school and working with doctors/therapists/whatever they need.

Like a lot of issues, I think it depends greatly on the individual family and on the particular group they're a part of.

[darkplumaged]

I don't think it's wrong or rude to ask if a child has autism or another condition if there is evidence for it. But there's no evidence that Abby has autism or developmental delays. She looks like a typical 3-year-old to me.

I think how a fundie family treats a child on the autism spectrum depends on the degree and type of fundieness and the family's general disposition toward children and normal kid behavior. I don't know why I think this, but I believe the Maxwells would be compassionate and try to keep their expectations realistic if a child in their family had autism. Maybe I only think this because as far as I know, they're not Pearl-style baby beaters. (I could be wrong about that, but I hope not.)

[Beeks]

Yeah, that's why I wish the OP had explained her thinking instead of just editing....

But I agree with you darkplumaged.

[zcccrv]

I have never, based on the photos, thought Abby had a development disorder but I have wondered about her exaggerated, goofy grinning faces she makes all the time. Is it sweet countenance teaching gone a bit wrong or is she just a strong willed little girl?

[dawn9476]

IIRC at the beginning of the Duggar's fame, some people speculated that John David had Asperger's.

[Jessica]

I think a better way to have phrased the post would be "How do you think the Maxwells or other fundie families would handle autism?" The post was just really bizarre. You can't really tell someone's autistic by looking at them like you can tell with other conditions.

[kpmom]

I have never, based on the photos, thought Abby had a development disorder but I have wondered about her exaggerated, goofy grinning faces she makes all the time. Is it sweet countenance teaching gone a bit wrong or is she just a strong willed little girl?

I'm hoping a strong willed little girl! And that it's never "trained" out of her.

[kb2]

Aren't kids off limits? A 2-3-4-12 year old has no choice in their life. I don't get the initial question and I don't get how it could even be open for discussion. How can that child be open for discussion?

I don't think mods need to be babysitters, but I do think this entire thread needs to be removed and not allowed in the future. It is exposing an innocent child, end of story.

The board is named "Free Jinger." As in, we think we know Jinger Duggar's personality well enough to say she would be happier breaking away from her family. And when the board was started Jinger was pretty young. That entire assumption is pretty presumptive of us, may or may not be true, and is/was about a child. I think the no discussing children ship sailed a really really long time ago.

I'm not sure why luv2laugh named a kid seemingly at random and asked if she had Autism. It does strike me as offensive and inaccurate. But a lot of things on here are offensive to me and objectively inaccurate. It would be hard to make this a bannable offense: would we need to change the board's name? Is there going to be an age limit of who we can talk about: will it be 13 or 18? Can we still criticize the way people raise their kids? Will visiono'yahweh have to change their username, because that's the name of a kid, and they chose it because they thought the name was funny? If a kid has crazy hair in a picture, can we comment? What about Sheridan's flower girl dress, should we delete any criticisms of it? What if someone did state their kid has autism, and then writes a post saying they can't take special ed in public school because that would be supporting the evil secular government, can we discuss that? What about the lady that had the crazy diet blog, saying her kids were allergic to rice, and people here disputed that--weren't posters here acting like they knew more about her own kids' health better than she did? We discussed whether Abby had been given a toy doctor kit for Christmas before--should that whole thread be deleted as well?

A no talking about kids rule would just be impractical. It's better to flame people who cross a moral line. Not only do you maintain your ability to say what you would want to say, but you can explain to others why and how much they are so incredibly wrong. Also, if we deleted everyone's offensiveness I wouldn't be able to remember who to dislike or how much to dislike them.