Marrying Well

[Angri-la]

Kendal's blog link is currently entertaining part of my staff. I am so glad these nuggets of Victoriana are preserved to assist. I will so be getting a heavy white nightgown, and absolutely not move when it comes time to "Pay the Piper" on my wedding night.

[contrary]

isnt that awful? jeez...

[DamnPrecious]

sorry! shoulda been more clear; i made it sound like kendal commented in the botkin blog.

it's on kendal's blog. here's the link: squaredancecd.com/Bride/brides.htm

:shock:

[kb2]

There's no requirement in my state/area that you have to have the ceremony in this state. I'm not even sure you have to live here. They could have gotten a license from Arizona, Arkansas, or Louisiana and travelled with it. You just have to apply for it in person and file it to the same court you got it from, which could be a pain. Or they might have gotten a real marriage license but then signed some non-legal covenant thing on the side.

I didn't see any officiant who would be able to legally marry them, though.

[Burris]

Thanks!!

I hope Kendal is commenting on it as the hoax it almost certainly is.

[Guest Anonymous]

GBot looks so smarmy to me....I could just smack him. You can tell he's practically high on the control

Whattaya mean, practically?

[OnceModestTwiceShy]

1. You know what, if I were Elizabeth or Anna Sophia, I'd be completely convinced that the Patriarch was basically just fucking with me at this point.

2. You cannot possibly know that you've "married well" after you've been married a year, or even less in David and Nadia's case. I am not married, but I would suggest that you do not know know whether you've married well until you've weathered some of life's storms with your significant other. Everybody in this situation is so fake and plastic and scripted that I bet the Botkins barely know each other, or even themselves, let alone the two young women who have made it into the clan by virtue of their adherence to extremely narrow standards. David and Nadia are probably still extremely awkward with one another, still getting to know the basics. They don't even know if they've married someone they actually like yet!

3. I know this means I spend way too much time on FJ, but I'm almost positive that the photo at the bottom of the page (of Geoff and David) is a cropped version of one in which AS is crying in the background. I think it appears in the David and Nadia engagement post. I think in the caption all three of them were supposedly "thanking God".

4. Geoff is a sociopathic sadist.

[Deleted12]

I didn't see any officiant who would be able to legally marry them, though.

Isn't Geoff one of the elders at their new church?

He may have the creds to legally marry people.

[oolong]

:shock:

Whoa whoa whoa -- Kendall posted this?? This isn't real, guys! It's a parody I read years ago (at the beginning of the internet!), and it might even be debunked on Snopes! I must find evidence! LOL if she is posting this as though it is real -- that's GOLD!

Edit: Burris linked to a debunking of this link above.

[oolong]

I'm sorry, I don't follow Kendall so I have no idea where her blog is and I can't find it. Can someone show me? She couldn't have posted this link as serious unless she didn't read it. ... right?

Edit: Found it. OK, she think it's funny, but also says it's real.

[oolong]

I hope Kendal is commenting on it as the hoax it almost certainly is.

Thanks Burris! I got so excited by the idea she was commenting on it seriously that I didn't see you've already said it's a hoax.

[apple1]

1. You know what, if I were Elizabeth or Anna Sophia, I'd be completely convinced that the Patriarch was basically just fucking with me at this point.

2. You cannot possibly know that you've "married well" after you've been married a year, or even less in David and Nadia's case. I am not married, but I would suggest that you do not know know whether you've married well until you've weathered some of life's storms with your significant other. Everybody in this situation is so fake and plastic and scripted that I bet the Botkins barely know each other, or even themselves, let alone the two young women who have made it into the clan by virtue of their adherence to extremely narrow standards. David and Nadia are probably still extremely awkward with one another, still getting to know the basics. They don't even know if they've married someone they actually like yet!

3. I know this means I spend way too much time on FJ, but I'm almost positive that the photo at the bottom of the page (of Geoff and David) is a cropped version of one in which AS is crying in the background. I think it appears in the David and Nadia engagement post. I think in the caption all three of them were supposedly "thanking God".

4. Geoff is a sociopathic sadist.

THAT (bold).

Tomorrow I will have been married to my Hubby for 34 years.

And I don't even like the expression "married well". More like- we are each other's best friends. That's not all, but still...

[Austin]

THAT (bold).

Tomorrow I will have been married to my Hubby for 34 years.

And I don't even like the expression "married well". More like- we are each other's best friends. That's not all, but still...

Happy anniversary, apple1! I hope you have a wonderful day!

Our 29th was last Sunday, and I would characterize things the same as you. No one knows for sure until well into the deal if they've "married well" (whatever that means exactly).

I imagine it's not that hard to figure out if you haven't "married well", though - and probably doesn't take all that long!

[apple1]

Happy anniversary, apple1! I hope you have a wonderful day!

Our 29th was last Sunday, and I would characterize things the same as you. No one knows for sure until well into the deal if they've "married well" (whatever that means exactly).

I imagine it's not that hard to figure out if you haven't "married well", though - and probably doesn't take all that long!

Thanks! And a belated happy anniversary to you, also :-)

[emmiedahl]

dh and I have almost ten years of marriage (obviously longer as a couple) under our belt and I still think marriage can be difficult. We've had challenges like dealing with exes, stepchildren, a cross country move, sick children, multiple miscarriages, a house full of toddlers, a massive change in financial status, major health crises, etc.

I don't think our marriage has been particularly difficult either. That's just how life is. You go through a lot as a couple, and it can be hard to be a good partner to a hurting spouse when you are hurting as well. But we are strong together, we love each other madly, and I think we are successful in facing challenges.

The Botkins have been through none.of.that. Even the dad... he's a dictator, what does he know about give and take? His wife looks freaking miserable; I would not want my husband taking advice from him! Those of you who have been married as long or longer than me and faced all of the challenges that life can hurl at you--you all can give advice til you are blue and I'll still be listening. The Botkins, not so much.

[daharyn]

What I want to know about is the section of the webinar called "When to skip courtship altogether."

Is that the modern-day version of "you've deflowered her, now you have to marry her," or is it for the promotion of a sort of order of fundy nuns? Seriously. :?:

[kb2]

My grandfather once said that people who feel they have a lot of advice to give about marriage are people who had a lot of problems in their marriage, so they want everyone to stay together and be as miserable as they are.

[tehgoobster]

What I want to know about is the section of the webinar called "When to skip courtship altogether."

Is that the modern-day version of "you've deflowered her, now you have to marry her," or is it for the promotion of a sort of order of fundy nuns? Seriously. :?:

My guess is that they mean going from friendship to marriage without having a formal courtship.

[Linnea]

Am I the only one who clicked on the Botkin link, scrolled down the pictures on the right side, and went "Whoa - a gay couple!?!" . . . only to realize it was a picture of GBot and, presumably, one of his sons?

[Marian the Librarian]

Imagine the pressure this "Aren't we so special, we're doing it so right" public production is going to put on these young couples. There won't be the eentsiest, weentsiest bit of room for a minor disagreement, a less than perfect mood, a bad day...

I've said it here on FJ before, and I'll say it again: marriage + meddling, controlling, interfering parents = Kiss Of Death.

[ladypuglover]

Thanks Burris! I got so excited by the idea she was commenting on it seriously that I didn't see you've already said it's a hoax.

Ummm... the poor thing really thinks it is real;

said...

Actually, I read somewhere that this was, in fact, false. I don't remember the source, but I do believe it was a false article.

June 24, 2011 9:40 AM

Kendal said...

Hmmm, really? I'll have to do some research on it. For now, it's more fun to believe it's true!

June 24, 2011 9:45 AM

Could some brave soul please set her straight?

[SamuraiKatz]

Hmmm...is marrying well fundie code for marrying your kid off for money, political gain or social connections? Sounds more like a business arrangement than a marriage...G-Bot scares me. I hope his daughters get wild and escape!

[Koala]

Ummm... the poor thing really thinks it is real;

Could some brave soul please set her straight?

Somehow I bet Kendal applies this philosophy often in life :roll:

[lilah]

My guess is that they mean going from friendship to marriage without having a formal courtship.

That or Daddy tell you who you are going to marry and you pray until you decide you also like this plan. Or in Razin Ruth's case she was sent away to re-education camp until she was submissive enough to accept it. Then she ran away (yay Ruth!)

[Black Aliss]

What I want to know about is the section of the webinar called "When to skip courtship altogether."

Is that the modern-day version of "you've deflowered her, now you have to marry her," or is it for the promotion of a sort of order of fundy nuns? Seriously. :?:

I think it's when the prospective couple is fast approaching their "best if used by. . ." dates, the fathers arrange the marriage, and because the families live hundreds of miles or more from each other, there really isn't an opportunity for the couple to spend time together, getting to know each other.