M is for Mama 16

[JermajestyDuggar]

49 minutes ago, smittykins said:

Years ago, the 17-year-old daughter of an IFB pastor in my town had a baby out of wedlock; she married the father when their son was about six months old. Shortly before the wedding, I asked her mom(whom I knew from a weight-loss group I attended at the time)if she believed they were ready for a lifelong commitment, and she said she thought so, and also mentioned something about “so they don’t fall into sin again.”

(I have no idea if they’re still together.)

I bet it’s partly why Amy’s teens wanted to get married so quickly. So they could keep having sex guilt free. I wonder if Amy ever hears these two underage teens having sex in her house and thinks, “well it’s ok since they are married.” 🙄

Edited August 22, 2023 by JermajestyDuggar

[smittykins]

I also think that’s why a lot of conservative Christian young people marry early, so they can have the “God-honoring sex.”

Edited August 22, 2023 by smittykins

[Red Hair, Black Dress]

Not sure they are having sex guilt free.  I suspect there will always always be subtle but pointed reminders to the couple that the baby was conceived in sin; the baby is sinful from the start, They will be reminded continuously they need to work extra extra hard forever to be forgiven for their sin of fornication (to quote Lori Alexander). Amy will use them as an example to the other children of what not to do.  This will not stop if and when the couple moves out.

Plus, I bet it's hella awkward to have sex in your parents' house even if you're married. People, especially your parents, can hear you.

[JermajestyDuggar]

22 minutes ago, Red Hair, Black Dress said:

Not sure they are having sex guilt free.  I suspect there will always always be subtle but pointed reminders to the couple that the baby was conceived in sin; the baby is sinful from the start, They will be reminded continuously they need to work extra extra hard forever to be forgiven for their sin of fornication (to quote Lori Alexander). Amy will use them as an example to the other children of what not to do.  This will not stop if and when the couple moves out.

Plus, I bet it's hella awkward to have sex in your parents' house even if you're married. People, especially your parents, can hear you.

I remember having sex in my parents’ house when I was home from college for a summer. We were pretty quiet and I didn’t have a squeaky bed 😂

[FilleMondaine]

8 hours ago, smittykins said:Shortly before the wedding, I asked her mom(whom I knew from a weight-loss group I attended at the time)if she believed they were ready for a lifelong commitment, and she said she thought so, and also mentioned something about “so they don’t fall into sin again.”

 

A weight-loss group? Weigh Down, by chance???

I love your current side-eye in your recollection!

My dad (graduated in the 70s) told me about a sophomore married and pregnant with her second kid. She would have been 15. Dad’s manner was really uncomfortable. Reading between the lines, you get the sense that even God-fearing community can be uncomfortable with a mandate to marry if pregnant.

[smittykins]

1 hour ago, FilleMondaine said:

A weight-loss group? Weigh Down, by chance???

Nope, TOPS(Take Off Pounds Sensibly).  We did meet at a church’s Sunday school building, though.

[JermajestyDuggar]

What’s crazy is that a lot of ordinary churches had women’s groups in the 90s that would read Gwen Shamblin’s book and watch some of her videos. Then they would meet and talk about it. This was long before she formed her own church. It’s just crazy to think at one point she was pretty mainstream Christian. 

[katilac]

On 8/18/2023 at 11:46 AM, JermajestyDuggar said:

Someone is trying to backpeddle. I bet some of her humpers pointed out she was putting homeschool vs public school in previous posts:

Interesting. Wild+Free is a well-known homeschooling group, so she used those words deliberately - but they're inclusive, so it's hard to imagine Abby liking them. Weird! 

On 8/19/2023 at 7:54 AM, JermajestyDuggar said:

Just this year, a fundie we’ve talked about on FJ allowed her underage child to marry another underage child due to pregnancy. The kids were 16 when they got pregnant and wanted to marry right away. Most parents would say, nope. You can wait until you are a legal adult to get married. But these fundie parents agreed after the kids jumped through a few hoops. It’s pointless for these children to marry. Just let them live together and raise the baby for awhile. And then when they are 18, they can decide if they want to marry or not. I also want to point out that if these fundies had taught their children about birth control, condoms, and comprehensive sex Ed, they probably wouldn’t be in this situation. But we know fundies hate teaching kids about condoms! 
 

https://raisingarrows.net/large-family-homeschool-life-week-6-2023/

I actually would not want my teen kid living with the baby mama or baby daddy either.

It's not something I would finance, and I wouldn't let them live together in my house. I think it's nearly as much pressure to stay together as getting married is (plus inertia is a thing). They can decide at 18 to live together, marry, or keep on as is. 

I was also annoyed by the reference to "setting up house" in his parents' spare bedroom. 

Did anyone get past the pregnancy part and read this gem? "It was Micah’s Special Night, so we played games, watched shows, and I gave him an essential oil backrub."

Micah is 13. I think he's aged out of mom giving him backrubs. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

5 hours ago, katilac said:

Interesting. Wild+Free is a well-known homeschooling group, so she used those words deliberately - but they're inclusive, so it's hard to imagine Abby liking them. Weird! 

I actually would not want my teen kid living with the baby mama or baby daddy either.

It's not something I would finance, and I wouldn't let them live together in my house. I think it's nearly as much pressure to stay together as getting married is (plus inertia is a thing). They can decide at 18 to live together, marry, or keep on as is. 

I was also annoyed by the reference to "setting up house" in his parents' spare bedroom. 

Did anyone get past the pregnancy part and read this gem? "It was Micah’s Special Night, so we played games, watched shows, and I gave him an essential oil backrub."

Micah is 13. I think he's aged out of mom giving him backrubs. 

I think I would probably allow overnights but maybe not 100% move in. Depending on the situation. If the girl’s parents are abusive, I would allow it. But if the girl’s parents are decent and willing to help out with the baby like I would be, I think it would just be switching off so the baby could be here some days of the week and then the girl’s house the rest of the time. 

[mysweetetc]

Braggie & co have to move out of their house for a while due to flooding from a burst pipe. She quotes a friend who said that she is being "tested" because Braggie wrote a book called Hard is Not the Same Thing As Bad. She ended the post by praising Jesus all over the place. Like, flooding your entire downstairs sucks, Braggie. You are allowed to feel frustrated and stressed. The constant, performative positivity is toxic.

She's grifting looking for a place to house all 12 of them (plus, I assume, whatever pets she hasn't abandoned). That should be interesting.

[JermajestyDuggar]

8 minutes ago, mysweetetc said:

Braggie & co have to move out of their house for a while due to flooding from a burst pipe. She quotes a friend who said that she is being "tested" because Braggie wrote a book called Hard is Not the Same Thing As Bad. She ended the post by praising Jesus all over the place. Like, flooding your entire downstairs sucks, Braggie. You are allowed to feel frustrated and stressed. The constant, performative positivity is toxic.

She's grifting looking for a place to house all 12 of them (plus, I assume, whatever pets she hasn't abandoned). That should be interesting.

Oh they have enough money for a big Airbnb rental. Unlike most families who have a flooded home. 

[SassyPants]

41 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

Oh they have enough money for a big Airbnb rental. Unlike most families who have a flooded home. 

And parents with a >3,000 sq foot home and seemingly the willingness to take lots of her kids all of the damn time. I am sure the family can flop there for a bit.

[JermajestyDuggar]

Just now, SassyPants said:

And parents with a >3,000 sq foot home and seemingly the willingness to take lots of her kids all of the damn time. I am sure the family can flop there for a bit.

Toxic positivity probably comes easy when you have plenty of money to fix every problem presented. I bet the Airbnb she finds will be huge and beautiful. And she will have an excuse to order take out every night. 

[SuperNova]

1 hour ago, mysweetetc said:

Braggie & co have to move out of their house for a while due to flooding from a burst pipe. She quotes a friend who said that she is being "tested" because Braggie wrote a book called Hard is Not the Same Thing As Bad. She ended the post by praising Jesus all over the place. Like, flooding your entire downstairs sucks, Braggie. You are allowed to feel frustrated and stressed. The constant, performative positivity is toxic.

She's grifting looking for a place to house all 12 of them (plus, I assume, whatever pets she hasn't abandoned). That should be interesting.

I love this season of life for her. Maybe Jesus will test her further and ruin all of the hideous wallpaper. On the off chance that it's not actually  Jesus, is there any way it could be their shoddy construction practices? 

[Xan]

I'm pretty sure that upon finding out that an entire first floor was flooded, my first reaction wouldn't be "God is good".  Honestly, why drag God into this at all?  If He's up there, He's dealing with fires, floods, and famines.  I doubt He's watching to make sure Braggie's pipes are intact or giving Himself a big old pat on the back for testing her.

None of our fundies seem able to handle any mishap or happy event without praising the Lord about it.  I don't get it.  I dropped a can of beans on my toe last night but I didn't thank the Flying Spaghetti Monster for sparing my foot or for the reminder that he could do worse and take me out at any moment.  Then again, the FSM is fairly mellow.

Edited August 23, 2023 by Xan

[danvillebelle]

Huh.  It's almost as if the Universe is giving her some payback for being a self-important, smug, narcissistic bitch who worships the house she "built herself" and exploits her kids online.  

[katilac]

2 hours ago, Xan said:

Honestly, why drag God into this at all?  If He's up there, He's dealing with fires, floods, and famines.  

No, no, no, pay attention: God is up there dealing with things like getting a surprise check so your whiny, crying children can have ice cream, and helping you find a good parking space. 

Note: these are not Abby examples, I've just heard many Christians saying and posting similar things. I don't know if Abby has ever done it. 

[PopRox]

I dislike Abbie as much as everyone, but OOF I feel for her with the flooded house. 😬 Sure, she has supportive enabling family and money to throw at the problem, so she'll be fine. But what a massive headache!

[Xan]

7 minutes ago, PopRox said:

I dislike Abbie as much as everyone, but OOF I feel for her with the flooded house. 😬 Sure, she has supportive enabling family and money to throw at the problem, so she'll be fine. But what a massive headache!

I agree, and yet...  I've overcome with schadenfreude.  I had a hard time watching that long trip to Europe where Abbie had date nights and merrily bounced around ignoring social conventions and arranging her travel so that those little kids were traveling and walking to destinations at night.  Somehow, I feel that it's the Almighty enjoying a Nelson Muntz laugh at her expense.  If it was one of my other pet fundies, I might feel bad.  Abbie flaunts her excess.  She can handle a little bad luck.

[hoipolloi]

2 minutes ago, Xan said:

I've overcome with schadenfreude

Didn't they build that house themselves, doing much of the electrical & plumbing work?

In any case, seems like if they had enough money for the endless trip to Europe they have enough to pay for alternate housing while repairs happen.

 

[Caroline]

On 8/19/2023 at 8:54 AM, JermajestyDuggar said:

Just this year, a fundie we’ve talked about on FJ allowed her underage child to marry another underage child due to pregnancy. The kids were 16 when they got pregnant and wanted to marry right away. Most parents would say, nope. You can wait until you are a legal adult to get married. But these fundie parents agreed after the kids jumped through a few hoops. It’s pointless for these children to marry. Just let them live together and raise the baby for awhile. And then when they are 18, they can decide if they want to marry or not. I also want to point out that if these fundies had taught their children about birth control, condoms, and comprehensive sex Ed, they probably wouldn’t be in this situation. But we know fundies hate teaching kids about condoms! 
 

https://raisingarrows.net/large-family-homeschool-life-week-6-2023/

So interesting. Sadly, in the blog post she also mentions that her 17 year old married son also wanted to quit school because he didn't want to take science. She also posted a sample course list for homeschool high school students. You're right - no health class or sex education on any list. Students in our high school have to take health for two years as freshmen and juniors. The topics are wide-ranging and relevant. Maybe the kid would have benefitted from going to evil public school. Maybe he would have had broader opportunities and maybe he would have met some inspiring adults. Poor kids and poor baby. It sounds like a bleak existence to me. 

Edited August 24, 2023 by Caroline

[anachronistic]

Her kids are *barefoot* in that water, carrying around pieces of wood that are as big as they are. I know it is only a burst hose, but I bet that she would act exact same way if it was literally raw sewage. 
 

I am staying with a kid this week roughly the same age as her twins. So far Kid has attempted to eat soap, dunked stuff in the toilet, and had a meltdown over not being allowed to have beer. Why? Because they are TWO. I would no more have them at a construction site - because that is what Abbie’s house currently is - than I’d have termites the size of horses. Why? - because it is NOT SAFE. Duh!

Edited August 24, 2023 by anachronistic
Pronouns are confusing

[QuiverFullOfGoats]

Maybe I missed seeing him on her stories but is Shaun even home to help with this disaster??  I hate watch with the sound off, too, so if she mentioned his whereabouts, I missed that as well 😆

Also, the bare feet on that nasty floor while throwing planks of wood is something.

[Rowan]

18 hours ago, mysweetetc said:

 She ended the post by praising Jesus all over the place. Like, flooding your entire downstairs sucks, Braggie. You are allowed to feel frustrated and stressed. The constant, performative positivity is toxic.

Oh no, see this flooding is a gift from God because now she can completely redecorate everything on the first floor! She can’t be told no! Stuff was damaged and now it all has to be replaced to make sure it all matches and has the right “vibe” so she is completely in her element. Can’t watch the kids, she has to go shopping at Anthro! 

[JermajestyDuggar]

16 minutes ago, Rowan said:

Oh no, see this flooding is a gift from God because now she can completely redecorate everything on the first floor! She can’t be told no! Stuff was damaged and now it all has to be replaced to make sure it all matches and has the right “vibe” so she is completely in her element. Can’t watch the kids, she has to go shopping at Anthro! 

She will fix those chipping concrete counters even though the water never touched them. And she will paint her cabinets even though they weren’t harmed much. And new furniture of course. Even though they probably weren’t ruined either.