"Women are best when they are quiet." So STFU Kendal

[Guest Anonymous]

“Most blessed of women be Jael, the wife of Heber the Kenite, most blessed of tent-dwelling women.

25 He asked for water, and she gave him milk; in a bowl fit for nobles she brought him curdled milk.

26 Her hand reached for the tent peg, her right hand for the workman’s hammer. She struck Sisera, she crushed his head, she shattered and pierced his temple.

27 At her feet he sank, he fell; there he lay. At her feet he sank, he fell; where he sank, there he fell - dead.

So she was called the most blessed of women because she not only stood up to her crappy husband, she killed him in a pretty horrid way. Not a quiet woman.

Now Deborah, a prophet, the wife of Lappidoth, was leading Israel at that time.

5 She held court under the Palm of Deborah between Ramah and Bethel in the hill country of Ephraim, and the Israelites went up to her to have their disputes decided.

6 She sent for Barak son of Abinoam from Kedesh in Naphtali and said to him, “The Lord, the God of Israel, commands you: ‘Go, take with you ten thousand men of Naphtali and Zebulun and lead them up to Mount Tabor.

7 I will lead Sisera, the commander of Jabin’s army, with his chariots and his troops to the Kishon River and give him into your hands.’â€

8 Barak said to her, “If you go with me, I will go; but if you don’t go with me, I won’t go.â€

9 “Certainly I will go with you,†said Deborah. “But because of the course you are taking, the honor will not be yours, for the Lord will deliver Sisera into the hands of a woman.†So Deborah went with Barak to Kedesh.

Not a quiet woman who stayed at home being submissive either. I think Kendall needs to read the Bible more.

ETA: If you notice that the one guy was afraid to go into battle without Deborah, so she must have been pretty fierce.

Actually, Sisera was not Jael's husband; he was the leader of the enemy army her husband was fighting. While fleeing for his life, Sisera came to Jael's tent, unaware that she was the wife of his arch enemy, and asked her for water.

[Guest Anonymous]

Kendal looks so normal to me. I guess i'm just judging from the one pic of her on her blog. She doesn't strike me as fundie till you read the crap she posts. Are there any other pics of her and her kids online. I've only been reading her blog for a couple weeks since I discovered her by coming here. Just curious.

[formergothardite]

Actually, Sisera was not Jael's husband; he was the leader of the enemy army her husband was fighting. While fleeing for his life, Sisera came to Jael's tent, unaware that she was the wife of his arch enemy, and asked her for water.

I totally misread that whole thing. LOL. Anyway, she still wasn't a passive little woman who stayed quiet.

[Annette]

I would love to know Kendal's opinion about that.. but this is one of the questions I'd like to ask every fundie-wife!

Well, she wrote a post about a friend in this situation, but did not explore that aspect. There are no comments...perhaps someone should ask!

thefatherknowsbest.com/2011/08/you-have-them-numbered.html

[Guest Anonymous]

I'm gonna ask! Does she allow anyone to comment? I'm gonna go over there right now and see.

[Austin]

No, I'm right there with you. I wouldn't consider myself a biblical scholar, though I have taken a few graduate level courses. In Kendal's exegesis, there seems to be 1) a convenient forgetting of women holding roles such as deacon in the early church and 2) a tendency to favor Paul's misogyny over Jesus' radical inclusivity.

You're right, because Jesus is really not that useful to them in this topic, clearly the most important topic in their pathetic lives (keeping women in their places). Paul's writings are much more helpful to them.

I have read books and heard people - egalitarians - try to make Paul's words more palatable to those of us who do not accept a God who would create women as "less than". I've tried to wrap my head around that - really, I have. It would have made my life easier to be honest. My last real interaction with my most recent church, one of the leader's wives put me on the spot in front of a bunch of other people and asked me, "Do you have a problem with Paul?"

Uh, yeah. At least as his wrtings are presented today. Buh-bye now.

[lilwriter85]

Well, she wrote a post about a friend in this situation, but did not explore that aspect. There are no comments...perhaps someone should ask!

thefatherknowsbest.com/2011/08/you-have-them-numbered.html

I agree someone should definitely ask Kendal's opinion on what a younger widow with children should do without no means of support. I predict if Kendal is asked that, she would be probably suggest remarriage, seeking help from a church or one of the Christian organizations like Harvest the Glean or whatever it is called.

Other fundie bloggers have adressed widow issues a few times. Loony Jessica said that women should remarry or seek help from the church and I think a couple of others made similar statements. For awhile I have wondered about what a fundie wife would do if her husband was disabled and unable to work and somebody here said that Vyckie at NLQ was in a similar situation after her husband was blinded and she set up some kind of profitable magazine/newsletter in her husband's name and that was how the family was supported.

My boyfriend's mom is a occupational therapist at rehab hospital and she deals mostly with people who are severely disabled after accidents and she has stated that most of her patients never have paying jobs again. I can't imagine what would a fundie wife would do if her husband was a quadriplegic who probably won't work again.

[emmiedahl]

It's funny because you still need to pay bills while you are looking for that husband. I went to glean the harvest and they offer funds for one-time expenses, not ongoing support. The church might help you for a few months if you have a generous and large church, but then you will be on your own. Considering that the freaking Botkins can't get husbands, a worn-out looking mom living in squalor with no money for clothes might not have a long line of suitors. She might need a plan B for a considerable amount of time. That would be welfare/social security of course, but the fundies don't want to admit that their system is dependent on the benevolent liberal government.

[Mommy22alyns]

I weep for their girls. And I'm not even being a little snarky.

Here's the thing - there are some people who are really cut out for the homemaker/full-time parent gig. My mom is one of them. She is one of the coolest, most passionate people I know. She rocks the homeschooling and the gardening and all that. But it is her passion. It is her choice. I just can't imagine being disappointed in my child for furthering their education or pursuing a passion in service to the world. That's so beyond f'ed up.

This exactly. It really makes me ill that that's what she's teaching her daughters.

[CanadianHippie]

It's funny because you still need to pay bills while you are looking for that husband. I went to glean the harvest and they offer funds for one-time expenses, not ongoing support. The church might help you for a few months if you have a generous and large church, but then you will be on your own. Considering that the freaking Botkins can't get husbands, a worn-out looking mom living in squalor with no money for clothes might not have a long line of suitors. She might need a plan B for a considerable amount of time. That would be welfare/social security of course, but the fundies don't want to admit that their system is dependent on the benevolent liberal government.

Silly emmie, you move in with your parents so your father can protect you from such frivolous things as bills. If you don't have parents, you live with a male sibling who will do the same. And if you don't have one of those, you ask the church to find you a new hubby ASAP because you shouldn't be out looking for one yourself seeing as your a woman and incapable of making huge, life changing decisions like who to marry or how many children you have.

[emmiedahl]

Really, though, how often is that feasible? For example, my father is dead, one brother lives in a one bedroom apartment (and pays like $2000/month, gotta love the San Diego housing prices!) and the other two are in college. Good thing I'm Jewish! And the primary worker in the house!

[demgirl]

My problem with Paul is that he wasn't Jesus and 3/4 of what he said goes against not only what Jesus said, but what Jesus impliedly and tacitly endorsed. The fundie elevation of Pauline doctrine, while paying lip service to Jesus as their savior, is one of the more mind-boggling things about these people.

Kendall makes my head hurt. I'm actually one of the posters about these parts who has tried to see things from her perspective, rather than simply writing her off as a horrid human being the way I do with people like the Seppis and Jeubs, because every once in a while I see a glimmer of something in her and her writing that makes me think she's capable of a certain amount of moderation and reasoned thought. And then she comes out w/ something like this and it's like -- fuck it. Go chill with the Seppis, Kendall.

[emmiedahl]

Paul bothers me too Demgirl. Almost all of the bad stuff in the NT comes from him. Imagine what a different religion Christianity would be if he (or the people who rewrote his words hundreds of years later) had not had such an impact on it! No hell, no misogyny...

[finleeport]

Ha! I left her a comment, I said 'If you think women should be silent, then why aren't you silent? you female creature'

he, I do you like them apples Kendal

[Effie]

I see the sibling relationships in the world and it's pitiful. I see unhappy women thinking they were going to have it all and be so incredibly happy. But what I see are unhappy miserable women who complain about their life, their children, their husbands and their jobs.

So no thanks! I want better for my girls.

Okay, I'm living in the world. Seriously, my sibling relationships are great. The people I know have good sibling relationships as well. I can tell from all the hearts they send to each other at facebook (lol). My little sister often writes smses to me like: "I love you" and "I miss you". She is 16 years old.

Please spare me the whole:

When you live in a me-centerted world then of course bringing in a sibling will be a burden. And you in turn will see anyone raising their daughters as we are as foolish. Our world is corrupt with selfishness and anytime someone steps out of that typical worldly behavior they get labeled as crazy and ignorant.

I'm living in the society and doing my part as a member of it. I want to help people out in the society and not only in my own family. I don't think that makes me any more selfish than a person who only cares for her own family, her own flesh and blood. I would not mind bringing in a sibling. In fact I have offered to do it before even though I live very poorly. The thing is though that I am providing for myself, and I would expect that of my grown-up sibling. I don't think I'm helping any grown-up person who is fully capable of supporting herself, while giving her money constantly (I know it's the same as doing someone a disservice). If she won't learn to support herself financially, then when will she? Never? Is that a goal to strive for? To never be able to support yourself? With that said, my siblings and I do help each other during hard times. If we know that the other person doesn't have much money we'll say: "I will pay". Sometimes I'm fighting with my middle sister about who will pay. She even get mad when I insist on paying for her (but I think that's healthy). To be able to support yourself financially is something to feel proud about. I know that feeling.

[formergothardite]

I have a ton of siblings. We are all really close and they would do what they could if I needed help, but none of them are rich, most of them have families of their own to support, so after a month or so I would need to be able to do something to help support myself. My church is also full of people struggling to get by. The economy is not great where I live, again they would do what they could, but they couldn't support me for an extended amount of time. And all this is coming from someone who so obviously hates her own life. She might not say it outright, but the way she writes about and treats her children and having to homeschool makes it pretty clear she despises every second of it.

[Effie]

I have a ton of siblings. We are all really close and they would do what they could if I needed help, but none of them are rich, most of them have families of their own to support, so after a month or so I would need to be able to do something to help support myself. My church is also full of people struggling to get by. The economy is not great where I live, again they would do what they could, but they couldn't support me for an extended amount of time. And all this is coming from someone who so obviously hates her own life. She might not say it outright, but the way she writes about and treats her children and having to homeschool makes it pretty clear she despises every second of it.

That's realistic. I think she is living in a bubble. I'm curious... what kind of jobs does she expect her daughters' husbands to have? I mean, they must get some really well-paid jobs if they will be able to provide for the whole big family.

Haha I wonder what Kendal would think of the following: My big sister is a lawyer and she earns a lot more than her bf. If they get a child together, they have decided that her bf will be the one who will stay at home and take care of the child for the first year.

[formergothardite]

It isn't that my family would view me as a burden like Kendal acts, they just literally couldn't afford to support me and my daughters. And would it really be loving to expect them to all bankrupt themselves to support me? Because that is what it would happen. Then what would happen to their daughters if they needed help? I would go ask, but since Kenal reads here and has posted here in the past, I hope she reads it and it gets her thinking. I think her pride will keep her from ever publically admitting she is less than right, so even if I did post it on her blog, she would just come up with some crap that makes no sense. I notices she skipped right over answering the post about Deborah the ruler. Me thinks she doesn't want her daughter reading that passage from the Bible.

[lilwriter85]

That's realistic. I think she is living in a bubble. I'm curious... what kind of jobs does she expect her daughters' husbands to have? I mean, they must get some really well-paid jobs if they will be able to provide for the whole big family.

Haha I wonder what Kendal would think of the following: My big sister is a lawyer and she earns a lot more than her bf. If they get a child together, they have decided that her bf will be the one who will stay at home and take care of the child for the first year.

Kendal would probably freak out and say something about a woman should be the keeper of the home. All of these fundie bloggers would probably say the same thing.

[Effie]

There's something about Kendal that awakens some kind of motherly affection inside of me towards her. I just want to hug her and tell her that all the things she has secretly desired and hoped for could still be true. I realize that she is older than me... but that's not the point. She comes across as quite vulnerable and scared.

[Guest Anonymous]

There's something about Kendal that awakens some kind of motherly affection inside of me towards her. I just want to hug her and tell her that all the things she has secretly desired and hoped for could still be true. I realize that she is older than me... but that's not the point. She comes across as quite vulnerable and scared.

Effie, I think you're a lovely and extremely compassionate person.

[Guest Anonymous]

Effie, I think you're a lovely and extremely compassionate person.

Both of you are better women than I am. Any sympathy I was capable of harboring towards Kendal bit the dust after her infamous blog in which she claimed that her husband took the day off from work so they could spend the day "disciplining" their daughter. Then expected the kid to thank her father for the training. Grr.

[Guest Anonymous]

Both of you are better women than I am. Any sympathy I was capable of harboring towards Kendal bit the dust after her infamous blog in which she claimed that her husband took the day off from work so they could spend the day "disciplining" their daughter. Then expected the kid to thank her father for the training. Grr.

Snarkyjan - Don't give me any good person credits, I surely don't deserve them. :twisted: I'd like to smack Kendal with a metaphorical rolled up newspaper. But I do think Effie is awesome.

[SunnyAndrsn]

Good grief, these fundies have their undies in a bunch. What's a good fundie to do? Vote for an evil liberal (And GASP! A BLACK MAN!) or a conservative, non-submissive woman?

Personally, I hope they decide not to vote in the next election.

[Effie]

Effie, I think you're a lovely and extremely compassionate person.

Wow thanks. I don't think I am. Well, I remember that Kendal once wrote that she used to be spanked as a child. I think she has been brainwashed in an early age. It doesn't seem like she has been able to make her own choices in life. I can't help feeling sorry for her, even though I honestly don't understand her.