17 Year Old Sent to 'Pray Away the Gay' Camp

[16strong]

The Daily Beast just released an excellent article about religious reform schools:

http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2016/06/12/rapes-daily-beatings-and-no-escape-christian-school-was-hell-for-these-boys.html

[Toothfairy]

On Wednesday, June 08, 2016 at 5:07 PM, NotALoserLikeYou said:

It's sad. I've seen those documentaries about these "boarding schools" and they're awful. And very unregulated! 

I saw kidnapped for christ. Disgusting. 

I'm currently fostering an lgbt youth. His parents poured hot water on him and beat him because he was sinning. They wanted to beat the gay out of him and make him feel what hell feels like. He still has scars and needs surgery 

[Howl]

14 minutes ago, Toothfairy said:

I saw kidnapped for christ. Disgusting. 

I'm currently fostering an lgbt youth. His parents poured hot water on him and beat him because he was sinning. They wanted to beat the gay out of him and make him feel what hell feels like. He still has scars and needs surgery 

So painful to read of his parent's abuse.  In your care, may he experience healing on every level.  

[19 cats and counting]

2 hours ago, Toothfairy said:

I saw kidnapped for christ. Disgusting. 

I'm currently fostering an lgbt youth. His parents poured hot water on him and beat him because he was sinning. They wanted to beat the gay out of him and make him feel what hell feels like. He still has scars and needs surgery 

Thank you for what you are doing.  There isn't enough people in this world like you.

[AlwaysExcited]

7 hours ago, Toothfairy said:

I saw kidnapped for christ. Disgusting. 

I'm currently fostering an lgbt youth. His parents poured hot water on him and beat him because he was sinning. They wanted to beat the gay out of him and make him feel what hell feels like. He still has scars and needs surgery 

You are wonderful. I wish the best for you, your family and your foster son.

[Rubaiyat]

11 hours ago, Toothfairy said:

I saw kidnapped for christ. Disgusting. 

I'm currently fostering an lgbt youth. His parents poured hot water on him and beat him because he was sinning. They wanted to beat the gay out of him and make him feel what hell feels like. He still has scars and needs surgery 

The upvote is for you, not the horrific abuse heaped on your foster son.  Please tell him he has the most fervent thoughts and prayers for peace and healing from a family from the internet.  We got into foster/adopting mainly because we learned that most LGBTIQ youth who are abused, meet that abuse at the hands of their families.  It is NOT okay.  May your foster son grow up strong and proud of every aspect of his humanity.  

[Emme]

11 hours ago, Toothfairy said:

I saw kidnapped for christ. Disgusting. 

I'm currently fostering an lgbt youth. His parents poured hot water on him and beat him because he was sinning. They wanted to beat the gay out of him and make him feel what hell feels like. He still has scars and needs surgery 

What the fuck. That's horrible. I would definitely be interested in fostering kids who've been kicked out or marginalized because of their sexuality (in addition to any kid that needed foster care). Did you ask for lgbt kids or was this child just placed with you? 

[foreign fundie]

Just got a text message from a friend asking my opinion on homosexuality, which is largely a taboo where I live. She said she would be horrified to find out her son was gay. So I just told her if this was the case he would need his mother's love even more and people do not choose to be attracted to the same sex.

I recently met a very open-minded pastor who had decided to embrace any gay Christian who would come to his church. When a while later faced with an actual gay, he couldn't even bring himself to shake his hand. 

There is a lot of actual fear and misunderstanding even among loving people. I hope as gays come out of hiding, and people actually get to know gay people, that this will change. But it will take time...

[Toothfairy]

17 hours ago, Howl said:

So painful to read of his parent's abuse.  In your care, may he experience healing on every level.  

Thank you. I hope he can heal too. So many foster kids especially teens are very loyal to their birth families. No matter how bad the abuse or neglect was. He wants to go home. He misses his mom, step dad, and siblings. He said he won't like boys anymore if he can go home. It's really sad. I'm his 5th home. He was in foster care for a month before I got the call. 

15 hours ago, 19 cats and counting said:

Thank you for what you are doing.  There isn't enough people in this world like you.

Even though I hate praise for fostering. Thank you. Lgbt youth are so hard to place. A lot of foster homes won't accept them or kick them out. Which I find sad. If you're a foster parent ypu shouldn't discriminate. 

10 hours ago, AlwaysExcited said:

You are wonderful. I wish the best for you, your family and your foster son.

Thank you!

6 hours ago, Rubaiyat said:

The upvote is for you, not the horrific abuse heaped on your foster son.  Please tell him he has the most fervent thoughts and prayers for peace and healing from a family from the internet.  We got into foster/adopting mainly because we learned that most LGBTIQ youth who are abused, meet that abuse at the hands of their families.  It is NOT okay.  May your foster son grow up strong and proud of every aspect of his humanity.  

Thank you. I really wish there were more foster homes. Especially for lgbt youth. A lot of them are put in group homes where they're also abused. A ton of foster families also abuse them. My foster son got kicked out of four homes. Why? Three didn't agree with his sexuality and one didn't want his age group. Make my blood boil. 

[Toothfairy]

5 hours ago, Emme said:

What the fuck. That's horrible. I would definitely be interested in fostering kids who've been kicked out or marginalized because of their sexuality (in addition to any kid that needed foster care). Did you ask for lgbt kids or was this child just placed with you? 

He was placed with me and they told me why he was in foster care. Family found out he liked boys, step dad burned him & beat him, then threw him out on the streets. 

I don't know specifically if you can ask for only lgbt youth. So many kids are afraid to come out. Some caseworkers might keep this info from you because they're trying to place them. Others might tell you. Or you might find out when they're placed with you. 

3 hours ago, foreign fundie said:

Just got a text message from a friend asking my opinion on homosexuality, which is largely a taboo where I live. She said she would be horrified to find out her son was gay. So I just told her if this was the case he would need his mother's love even more and people do not choose to be attracted to the same sex.

I recently met a very open-minded pastor who had decided to embrace any gay Christian who would come to his church. When a while later faced with an actual gay, he couldn't even bring himself to shake his hand. 

There is a lot of actual fear and misunderstanding even among loving people. I hope as gays come out of hiding, and people actually get to know gay people, that this will change. But it will take time...

My neighbor's church threw a baby shower for a gay couple and their new daughter. Nobody had a problem with this. Even the priest baptisted her. 

 

This whole tragedy makes me ill. A gay person can't even walk down the street or go anywhere without fear of being harmed. The people okay with this are sick. So many lgbt people are beaten,kicked out, and discriminated against. All because they don't agree with their sexuality. 

[RosyDaisy]

My SIL and her wife are frequently at my home and attend church with my husband and I. If somebody has a problem with that they can go fuck themselves. These women are family, and I love them. Our church loves them. Our Heavenly Father loves them. There is nothing wrong LGBTQ+. There is something very wrong and evil about what is happening to them.

[GiGi_41]

Thank you. I really wish there were more foster homes. Especially for lgbt youth. A lot of them are put in group homes where they're also abused. A ton of foster families also abuse them. My foster son got kicked out of four homes. Why? Three didn't agree with his sexuality and one didn't want his age group. Make my blood boil. 

I have a straight teen right now. Some of her behaviors drive me a little bonkers...imagine a 16 year old girl times 10. I asked the worker if there were some other homes with teens so maybe I could have a little support. She said "honey you are it, you are a giant among men." It was so hard for them to find a home for this girl they had to send a message out to 5 surrounding counties. And she is not a hard kid, as in no drugs, alcohol, mental illness, or court issues. Just a 16 yo girl who has had a rough start.

Read that paragraph again. I am one of the few homes in two counties that is willing to consider teen girls. She has to share a room with a 5 year old, because we were the only home that was open. Out of 5 counties, my county was the only one that considered helping.

Please let this sink in. There are so many teens that get sent back to situations that aren't the best because there is no where for them to go. If anyone is considering a tough job maybe think about fostering a teen.

ETA spelling and grammar cause it's early!

[Toothfairy]

15 hours ago, GiGi_41 said:

 

 

 

 

I have a straight teen right now. Some of her behaviors drive me a little bonkers...imagine a 16 year old girl times 10. I asked the worker if there were some other homes with teens so maybe I could have a little support. She said "honey you are it, you are a giant among men." It was so hard for them to find a home for this girl they had to send a message out to 5 surrounding counties. And she is not a hard kid, as in no drugs, alcohol, mental illness, or court issues. Just a 16 yo girl who has had a rough start.

 

 

Read that paragraph again. I am one of the few homes in two counties that is willing to consider teen girls. She has to share a room with a 5 year old, because we were the only home that was open. Out of 5 counties, my county was the only one that considered helping.

 

 

Please let this sink in. There are so many teens that get sent back to situations that aren't the best because there is no where for them to go. If anyone is considering a tough job maybe think about fostering a teen.

 

 

ETA spelling and grammar cause it's early!

I know as a foster parent I hate when people saying this to me, but I love when people take in teens. I've fostered and adopted many teens and older kids. They're toddlers in big bodies.

My old county had 73 foster homes for 400 kids only 3 including me took in teens. I was the only home willing to take teen boys and girls. Right now the state keeps calling me with placements. Knowing that I'm full  but have extra room. They keep begging me to just take one more and willing to let things slide. It's so hard to say no. I have 4 teen foster kids right now. Plus my own kids and husband. The caseworker on the phone told me there's only 12 foster homes that she currently  knows about that will take in teens. That's out of hundreds currently licensed.  That number goes down if the teen is gay. 

The most heartbreaking calls are when you're their last chance at placement. If you don't take him he's going to have to go a group home or sleep in a conference room. So sad.