Bates Family Part 14 - Party in Pink

[sunshine]

3 hours ago, 19 cats and counting said:

Does Tori's courtship deserve its own thread?

Ummmmm, YES! Like, last week from the Up segment with John saying she has a boyfriend.

[BullyJBG]

On 2016-05-01 at 10:48 PM, nebula402 said:

I've been lurking here for years, but this is my first post.  Just wanted to say that I live really close to the Bateseseseses and just saw some of Carlin & Trace's graduation party pictures come up on my Facebook feed.  Apparently some of the Duggars were there (Jana, Jinger, Jessa, & Spurgeon at least) and also a baby kangaroo.  No idea who gave these people a kangaroo, but there you go.

Welcome to FJ. I gotta say, your mention of a baby kangaroo, my first thought was the end of that Veggie Tales song "everybody's got a baby kangaroo".........

[formergothardite]

3 minutes ago, BullyJBG said:

Welcome to FJ. I gotta say, your mention of a baby kangaroo, my first thought was the end of that Veggie Tales song "everybody's got a baby kangaroo".........

"yours is pink, but mine is blue"....

I haven't seen Veggie Tales in years and still know their songs. 

[19 cats and counting]

So it is Erin's birthday today.  On the family's IG Kelly initially posted a baby pic of Katie thinking it was Erin as a happy birthday shoutout.  It was replaced by a (good) pic of adult Erin with Chad.  

I'm not a mother, so I am not one to ask, but do mothers mix up their children's baby pictures?  (I've heard of mothers being the only people who can tell identical twins apart.)

[Screamapillar]

16 minutes ago, 19 cats and counting said:

So it is Erin's birthday today.  On the family's IG Kelly initially posted a baby pic of Katie thinking it was Erin as a happy birthday shoutout.  It was replaced by a (good) pic of adult Erin with Chad.  

I'm not a mother, so I am not one to ask, but do mothers mix up their children's baby pictures?  (I've heard of mothers being the only people who can tell identical twins apart.)

You would think that the ten or so years between Erin's birth and Katie's birth would make a difference in the "look" of their baby pictures....but as we all know the Bates were living in an early 90's fashion time capsule up until recently.

[formergothardite]

41 minutes ago, 19 cats and counting said:

So it is Erin's birthday today.  On the family's IG Kelly initially posted a baby pic of Katie thinking it was Erin as a happy birthday shoutout.  It was replaced by a (good) pic of adult Erin with Chad.  

I'm not a mother, so I am not one to ask, but do mothers mix up their children's baby pictures?  (I've heard of mothers being the only people who can tell identical twins apart.)

Most of the mothers I know don't. Sometimes they have to look a second time, but I would say most of them can identify baby pictures, even in the large families. 

I've always felt that Kelly was/is not nearly the involved mother she makes herself look like. I know people came up with a thousand justifications for this,  but she is the mother who, when asked, couldn't name her children. Is it really surprising that she also can't recognize their baby pictures? 

Or it could be that it was the job of someone else to write the happy birthday post from Kelly and that person didn't know which baby was which. 

[MorningMist]

58 minutes ago, 19 cats and counting said:

So it is Erin's birthday today.  On the family's IG Kelly initially posted a baby pic of Katie thinking it was Erin as a happy birthday shoutout.  It was replaced by a (good) pic of adult Erin with Chad.  

I'm not a mother, so I am not one to ask, but do mothers mix up their children's baby pictures?  (I've heard of mothers being the only people who can tell identical twins apart.)

The Bates played a game in one episode (I'm sure the video is up on YouTube) called Name That Bates Baby...they were all terrible at it, like they thought one picture was from much earlier than it was - probably because of the clothes because they are all form the 1940s.

To be fair, Kelly did get the obvious ones like Trace and Carlin right and they managed to guess Zach due to how old the picture was. And I can see how some of the kids pictures can get mixed up, Lawson and Judson/Jeb for example are incredible alike and I guess I can see the resemblance of Erin in Katie. 

ETA: I just read the post and Kelly blames not having her glasses which is plausible since we all saw what a train wreck Zach and Whitney's baby announcement was because of that. It's a good excuse but it can very easily be a lie...

[Melissa1977]

1 hour ago, 19 cats and counting said:

So it is Erin's birthday today.  On the family's IG Kelly initially posted a baby pic of Katie thinking it was Erin as a happy birthday shoutout.  It was replaced by a (good) pic of adult Erin with Chad.  

I'm not a mother, so I am not one to ask, but do mothers mix up their children's baby pictures?  (I've heard of mothers being the only people who can tell identical twins apart.)

I'm a mother of two (thanks to evil birth control) and I think it's possible to mix up baby pictures when you have 19 kids.

This said, if you have kids who look alike, closed in age or using the same clothes, it's easy to mix up even in little families.

My kids are not alike, plus I bought new clothes for the youngest, so I never mix up. 

[Melissa1977]

There's one thing I cannot understand. How is it posible to not remember 19 names? I mean, I understand Kelly calls Isaiah to Warden, or Jeb to Judson, because they're close in age and look and dress alike. This happens sometimes even in little families. But...not to remember your kids names? Sorry? I know more than 19 names. In fact, teachers learn 25 new names every year. Not so difficult.

Maybe it would be easier to remember the names if they were different. I mean, why do you call 3 daugthers Callie, Addie and Ellie? Come On!

[19 cats and counting]

31 minutes ago, Melissa1977 said:

There's one thing I cannot understand. How is it posible to not remember 19 names? I mean, I understand Kelly calls Isaiah to Warden, or Jeb to Judson, because they're close in age and look and dress alike. This happens sometimes even in little families. But...not to remember your kids names? Sorry? I know more than 19 names. In fact, teachers learn 25 new names every year. Not so difficult.

Maybe it would be easier to remember the names if they were different. I mean, why do you call 3 daugthers Callie, Addie and Ellie? Come On!

I'm one of two.  Frequently my mom would call me by my sister's name, combine our names (sounded a lot like she was calling 'kerosene'), or call me by a cat's name before she got to mine.  (My sister and I are 2.5 years apart and never looked alike.  Despite rocking cat ear headbands, I never looked like a cat).  

Some people are also terrible with names.  I was a camp counselor in high school, and by the time I learned names, summer was over.

[nausicaa]

41 minutes ago, Melissa1977 said:

There's one thing I cannot understand. How is it posible to not remember 19 names? I mean, I understand Kelly calls Isaiah to Warden, or Jeb to Judson, because they're close in age and look and dress alike. This happens sometimes even in little families. But...not to remember your kids names? Sorry? I know more than 19 names. In fact, teachers learn 25 new names every year. Not so difficult.

Maybe it would be easier to remember the names if they were different. I mean, why do you call 3 daugthers Callie, Addie and Ellie? Come On!

I agree, it's weird. I grew up near a family of 11 kids and even though we didn't go to school together I could list all of them in order from playing over at their house a couple of times. Even today, some twenty years later, I can recall the first seven in order.

[formergothardite]

6 minutes ago, 19 cats and counting said:

I'm one of two.  Frequently my mom would call me by my sister's name, combine our names (sounded a lot like she was calling 'kerosene'), or call me by a cat's name before she got to mine.  (My sister and I are 2.5 years apart and never looked alike.  Despite rocking cat ear headbands, I never looked like a cat).  

Some people are also terrible with names.  I was a camp counselor in high school, and by the time I learned names, summer was over.

Yeah, but if your mom was asked to name her children, would she decline and say that she couldn't? Mixing up names is one thing, refusing to even try to list the names of her kids is another. It really isn't like a camp counselor thing, she wasn't expected to list the names of 19 strangers she just met, these were her children who she gave birth to over a period of time and there is absolutely no excuse for her to decline to tell people the names of all her children. 

I think she really is that shitty of a mother and no one needs to try to create excuses for her admitting she can't list the names of all her kids when asked. I think she checked out of parenting a long, long time ago and doesn't  have a normal/parent child relationship with her children. 

And really, yeah, it can be easy to mix of baby pictures, but if Kelly was going to put up a birthday post she could have taken a few damn seconds to make sure she grabbed the correct baby picture. 

[SassyPants]

And the moral of the lesson here?

More is not always or necessarily better.

More children does not make each child MORE special.

I never understood that fundie logic.

I guess they have never heard of dilution or finite time.

[MorningMist]

17 minutes ago, formergothardite said:

Yeah, but if your mom was asked to name her children, would she decline and say that she couldn't? Mixing up names is one thing, refusing to even try to list the names of her kids is another. It really isn't like a camp counselor thing, she wasn't expected to list the names of 19 strangers she just met, these were her children who she gave birth to over a period of time and there is absolutely no excuse for her to decline to tell people the names of all her children. 

Gosh, I didn't realise that she'd done this. That's a pretty poor effort on her part. Especially considering the Bates appear to be slightly less reliant on the buddy system - even DQ could name all her children and she completely didn't raise hers!

[formergothardite]

6 minutes ago, MorningMist said:

Gosh, I didn't realise that she'd done this. That's a pretty poor effort on her part. Especially considering the Bates appear to be slightly less reliant on the buddy system - even DQ could name all her children and she completely didn't raise hers!

It was in an interview back before they got famous and when they had less children. She was asked to name her kids in order of their birth and she said she couldn't but that Gil could. This wasn't done in some sort of a joke fashion, though more recently they have done the same thing on the show and tried to pretend it is a joke, but I suspect it is just them cover up the reality that in the past Kelly admitted she struggled to list the names of her children. 

In their original blog, Kelly described how she assigned a buddy to the baby before it was even born and the buddy helped care for the baby the moment it was born.  Oh yes, they used the buddy system heavily. Kelly didn't raise her children anymore than Michelle did, she has just done a better job at pretending that she did. I think Michelle might have done a better job at parenting babies than Kelly did. 

[twinmama]

On 4/29/2016 at 3:21 PM, LawsonBatesEgo said:

I don't find them rude/obnoxious as a rule, but both have definitely had moments where they have come across as such, like Carlin visiting Michael and telling her her couch was ugly. I like to think that even at 17, I wouldn't have been enough of a dick to walk into SOMEONE ELSE'S HOME and insult their things. 

A friend or stranger, never; but my siblings? I might have! I had a big problem with "thinking before you speak" (heard that NONSTOP as a child) and siblings tend to have no filter with each other sometimes.

3 hours ago, 19 cats and counting said:

So it is Erin's birthday today.  On the family's IG Kelly initially posted a baby pic of Katie thinking it was Erin as a happy birthday shoutout.  It was replaced by a (good) pic of adult Erin with Chad.  

I'm not a mother, so I am not one to ask, but do mothers mix up their children's baby pictures?  (I've heard of mothers being the only people who can tell identical twins apart.)

Fraternal twins who look nothing alike as babies and as 4 year olds, but their damn NICU pics I can never tell from their faces. I had no trouble telling them apart THEN, but looking at the pics now it's like "He's in the isolet by the window! That's baby B!" or "the lovey in his crib is baby A's lovey!" and that's the only way. Gotta use the context clues to fake knowing which is which  So I don't judge that one. However in my defense, a 29 weeker looks like a fetus, not a baby!

[Melissa1977]

Kelly never holds kids. She's an ant queen, she pushes babies off and then the working-ants care for them. 

I'm sure she heavily wanted the baby #20, but she seemed sincerely calmed and content when she said that she wasn't having more. I supposed menopause striked hard, because she was pretty clear that she was done. Michelle isn't able to tell the same, she's still dreaming of a miracle. Maybe JB is more exigent than Gil. Or Kelly is enjoying having adult kids and organising courtships and weddings, and having less pressure, while Michelle doesn't  know what to do with her life.

In old Bates episodes (included in Duggar's series), there were the elder kids caring the little Bates, and Gil also helped, but not Kelly.

I think  in both families, elder kids have been severely abused, and middle kids severely abused&ignored. The little ones are probable less abused but they don't have real parents, real homeschooling,  real rutines... The last 8 Bates are lost kids.

[formergothardite]

I think Michelle really liked babies, which is why she was the "buddy" to the babies and is taking the end of her baby making a lot harder. I don't think Kelly really liked babies(or children) that much and probably does enjoy the stage where she gets to be the mother of the bride and organize courtships. She still has fairly young children in the house, but she also still has the older kids to raise them. I don't think Kelly misses having a baby around like Michelle does. 

[QuiverDance]

My grandmother had 10 babies.  She had a hard time identifying her kids in old photos sometimes.  

[RosyDaisy]

There is no mistaking my sister and I in pictures. My sister looks like our dad, and I am practically a clone of our mother.

[elliha]

I think the big difference between Kelly and Michelle is that Kelly has always managed to retain a sense of worth for being Kelly while Michelle sees her main value in being a baby maker extraordinaire. When Kelly could not have more babies she just kept being Kelly but Michelle suffered (suffers?) an identity crisis. 

[SassyPants]

1 hour ago, elliha said:

I think the big difference between Kelly and Michelle is that Kelly has always managed to retain a sense of worth for being Kelly while Michelle sees her main value in being a baby maker extraordinaire. When Kelly could not have more babies she just kept being Kelly but Michelle suffered (suffers?) an identity crisis. 

And sadly, neither women projected a decent example of being a good mother. All those children/blessings and neither of those mega procreators present a decent or healthy example of motherhood.

It's all about the procreation and attention of pregnancy and having a large family- Nothing about the actual healthy parenting of such.

It should be illegal.

Worse than puppy mills.

[HereticHick]

This is the 2nd time that Alyssa or John have posted an Instagram pic of cleaning a dance studio: 

 I guess they sometimes take Allie Jane with them when they clean.  Not to be a leghumper, but good for them for being hard working.  

[SassyPants]

4 hours ago, HereticHick said:

This is the 2nd time that Alyssa or John have posted an Instagram pic of cleaning a dance studio: 

 I guess they sometimes take Allie Jane with them when they clean.  Not to be a leghumper, but good for them for being hard working.  

ABSOLUTELY! 

[colors_outside15]

A fundie (without wholesome swimwear on) who is still a fundie: