Never be sad again?? - Marriage

[Spartan89]

I was reading the comments on Lina's latest post, and her comment to TT is kind of concerning IMO:

Thanks, Honey!

You're right, my Love, soon we will be married - be'ezrat Hashem - and I will not have any reason to be sad again! It will be pure bliss being able to spend the holiest day of the week with you!

She is in for a huge disappointment! I've never been married, but I am in a long term relationship, and there are definitely times of sadness (both together and apart). If anything is guaranteed in life, it is the fact that there will be sad days (holidays included!). To say otherwise is putting a completely ridiculous and unrealistic expectation on a relationship.

I'm a big believer that other people can't create happiness for you, only enhance what happiness you already possess. Relying so much on a partner practically guarantees a co-dependent, unhealthy relationship.

But, this is Lina and Love....I really don't know why I'm surprised anymore :roll:

[masagoroll]

Why does she always capitalize Love? Is he a deity?

[darareaksmey]

Sounds like a fifteen-year-old's interpretation of what love and marriage must be like. I know I used to think this way when I was a boyfriend-less teen. Then, years later, I got married and realized that I can't expect my husband to take on my perpetual happiness as his life's work. Nor can I take on his. Wow, she is in for a rough time if this is what she thinks married life will be like.

[fundiefan]

Sounds to me like both of them are going into this with their eyes glued shut. The disappointment when life actually contains sadness, even when you are married to the perfect Love of your life, will knock them both sideways.

[demgirl]

:angry-banghead:

[let-them-eat-cake]

The thing about this "fake Jew" movement is the belief that if you follow all of the "rules" (Torah and whatnot) then your life will be blessed and awesome and bad things cannot touch you. Not true of course, but that's what they believe. It sounds like she thinks once she and Tony are married, living together, and will be able to follow Torah full-force their lives are going to be perfect.

I feel sorry for her because it's just going to end badly.

[twin2]

Sounds to me like both of them are going into this with their eyes glued shut. The disappointment when life actually contains sadness, even when you are married to the perfect Love of your life, will knock them both sideways.

Lina yes, but I bet Taliban Tony knows exactly what he is doing.

[emmyfair]

Well ... Lina's going to find it's a long, long, way down from those expectations.

[bananacat]

Oh wow, I'm betting on divorce in less than year. I'll put my imaginary $5 into the pot and bet it will last 3 months. Any other takers?

[Little_Eyes]

Uhm, this is crazy. Even for Lina. I'm just going to say it: she's delusional.

Bananacat, I will add five to the pot, but my vote gives the whole thing 2 years. There'll be a baby, I think, and the whole thing will be "OMGZ, we're a wonderful quiverful family." Of course, I wish divorce on no one, but this has trainwreck stamped all over it. Maybe, hopefully, I'll be proved wrong.

[slickcat79]

Uhm, this is crazy. Even for Lina. I'm just going to say it: she's delusional.

Bananacat, I will add five to the pot, but my vote gives the whole thing 2 years. There'll be a baby, I think, and the whole thing will be "OMGZ, we're a wonderful quiverful family." Of course, I wish divorce on no one, but this has trainwreck stamped all over it. Maybe, hopefully, I'll be proved wrong.

Considering Love's personality, Lina might actually be lucky if she manages to end their relationship in divorce :(

[ladypuglover]

:facepalm:

[clibbyjo]

What? You all don't have Love's who make you happy 24/7? I am always so happy when my husband goes to play hockey for hours and leaves me to takes the kids to their activities. I love it even more when I ask him to clean the bathroom and he says "I will" but falls asleep. These are treasured gifts to me, how can the rest of you been so heartless towards your spouses?

[Witsec6]

What? You all don't have Love's who make you happy 24/7? I am always so happy when my husband goes to play hockey for hours and leaves me to takes the kids to their activities. I love it even more when I ask him to clean the bathroom and he says "I will" but falls asleep. These are treasured gifts to me, how can the rest of you been so heartless towards your spouses?

YOU ASK YOUR HEADSHIP TO CLEAN THE BATHROOM? :o

[DistantStar]

I haven't been married but I've been in two major relationships and I think it's fair to say that love isn't all sunshine and rainbows coming out of a unicorn's nethers. At least, not for long, though that bit's fun while it lasts. Eventually real life starts happening again, and I'm sure not going to be the only one to clean the bathroom! :D

[darkplumaged]

I, for one, am still unwilling to believe that they will actually make it to the altar chuppah. I think TT will do something insane before then and her parents will demand she break it off. But what do I know?

She is out of her mind if she thinks that marriage will be like floating on a pink cloud of happiness 24-7. My headship brings me great joy, but in some ways, my life has gotten harder and more complicated since we got married. If they do get married, she is in for quite a fall when she finds this out.

[Austin]

Wow, is she in for a big letdown or what? And I'd say that even if she wasn't marrying a douche like Taliban Tony, but no person and no amount of love or marital bliss can make a person never be sad again.

[Angri-la]

YOU ASK YOUR HEADSHIP TO CLEAN THE BATHROOM? :o

Obviously a heathen has infiltrated! Stone her! She has ideas.

Remind me why Love is aka Taliban TONY. I am fascinated with Lina and Love, but I only read about it here. It's like a fundie tabloid.

[browngrl]

Reading her blog is like watching a train wreck where the trains and everyone else is coated in a thick layer of honey - it is all gooey and sweet on the outside but you know that under all that goo is some serious damage.

[ridethekick]

The week after we got married, my husband was diagnosed with cancer. Married or not, I had reason to be pretty fucking sad.

Ugh, naive little SAHDs.

[Soulhuntress]

Because I am SO happy when DH leaves his socks all over the place, leaves the dishes in the sink and makes me pick up dog poo on walks. Life is not all unicorns and rainbows in the real world ya know.

[twin2]

Remind me why Love is aka Taliban TONY. I am fascinated with Lina and Love, but I only read about it here. It's like a fundie tabloid.

He's called Taliban Tony for this little pearl of wisdom he left on Lina's blog:

IF you want your husband to begin acting as though he were a Taliban Soldier enforcing Sharia Law... then disrespect him, and so will your outcome be. However, IF you want to live your life with a peaceful man that treasures you and Loves you with all of his might... then submit and follow him, and so will your outcome be.

I have no idea what she sees in this guy.

[Dinorah]

I, for one, am still unwilling to believe that they will actually make it to the altar chuppah. I think TT will do something insane before then and her parents will demand she break it off. But what do I know?

She is out of her mind if she thinks that marriage will be like floating on a pink cloud of happiness 24-7. My headship brings me great joy, but in some ways, my life has gotten harder and more complicated since we got married. If they do get married, she is in for quite a fall when she finds this out.

Agree with this. I'm baffled her parents are supposedly fine with her marrying someone who she barely knows, especially considering they're unhappy with her religious choices and wanted her to study and get a job. Unless this guy is A LOT nicer and reliable-looking in real life than he appears to be online.

[Elle]

Why does she always capitalize Love? Is he a deity?

It's being used as a nickname, so would be capitalized, though "My" should be too as she's using both parts as the nickname instead of as a possessive. "My daughter is my love" versus, "Hey, My Love, how about see that new movie tonight?"

[Elle]

Anyone who thinks marriage is a cure-all for ever being sad is either delusional, ignorant, or has been brainwashed into bottling up emotions. None of these are good.