Lourdes and Nolan marry - Lawsuit against DPIAT/R filed

[Palimpsest]

I didn't go to the D.C. conference, BUT I did go to the Great Homeschool Conference in Cincinnati this weekend. And David Gibbs III, Lourdes Torres-Manteufel's lawyer, did a Q&A on homeschooling laws. Because he asked ahead of time by several people about the lawsuit, he spoke about it in very vague terms. He said that he thought that the homeschooling community needed to "purge the fringe elements in the movement" after discussing the patriarchy movement, particularly that they didn't think women should be educated. He also said that if the homeschool community didn't start policing itself, the government would start doing it for them. My impression was that that was why he took the case.

In another session Chris Jeub also discussed the lawsuit (as well as a little tift with Kevin Swanson about Homeschoolers Anonymous - I will start a thread about that one). He said that the Patriarchy Movement is dying. Even Swanson has expressed his doubts about some parts of it. He also said that everyone is pretty worried about all this. I got the impression all the bad publicity is making it harder for them to fly under the radar and they don't like it.

John Stonestreet also spoke for a couple minutes about how he appreciated Michael Farris's post about how he should have said something sooner. Stonestreet said that he too had been troubled by some of the stuff he was hearing from conferences attendees about some of the patriarchal stuff and wished that he had said something.

In general, most people seemed unaware of the whole debacle which is odd since Doug is a Tool has been a speaker there for years. This year of course he was off the schedule. Also there were far fewer gender/patriarchy/purity speakers and booths. I think the tide is turning.

I spent the whole weekend on the edge of my seat waiting to see what would happen next. I think it's great that they acknowledge patriarchy and legalism are bad. But they still have no way of handling the fact that the majority of abuse of children occurs within families or by acquaintances. Since they are so opposed to any outside intervention in families, abuse will continue until they come up with a plan.

Thanks so much. So interesting. I bolded major stuff rather randomly because it is all incredibly informative.

I'm not yet convinced that Patriarchy is tumbling into the abyss, but the foundations are crumbling!

Food for discussion and a certain amount of cautious optimism.

[starfish]

I'm sorry if I'm straying waaay OT here, but FJ usually seems to be okay with that...I have often thought about asking my primary care doc about this, but 1) I hardly ever see him, so I thought it would be weird or suspicious to just show up and ask for some xanax and 2) given my pretty much all-encompassing anxiety, I think I would probably go through an Rx for "situational anxiety" in a day or two anyway.

I told my therapist once that I wish I could just have a brain transplant. Because my wiring is so faulty it will never be up to code :lol:

I finally brought it up with my doctor because I had been having what-proved-to-be panic attacks. They were scaring me to death, so I finally overcame my embarrassment and went to my doctor. I really don't take them (Xanax pills ) much, but it makes me feel much better to know they are there. Flying and visits to the dentist are the situations I am most likely to experience a panic attack. I tell very few folks I take them, but I wanted to share my experience on here in the event it might help someone.

[dawbs]

I'm sorry if I'm straying waaay OT here, but FJ usually seems to be okay with that...I have often thought about asking my primary care doc about this, but 1) I hardly ever see him, so I thought it would be weird or suspicious to just show up and ask for some xanax and 2) given my pretty much all-encompassing anxiety, I think I would probably go through an Rx for "situational anxiety" in a day or two anyway.

I told my therapist once that I wish I could just have a brain transplant. Because my wiring is so faulty it will never be up to code :lol:

FWIW (and this all falls firmly into personal opinions camp, I am not an expert by ANY twist of the definition),

I explained to my docs my reaction to the last time I had an MRI--there wasn't any hesitation for them to hand me valium for the next one.

And PCP are (understandably) hesitant to give out behavioral scripts (I personally think they *should* be--they're meddling w/ things they often really REALLY don't understand)--but I also findd that they often don't 'get' mental illness any more than the general public does (the difference between "I suffer from anxiety" and "I'm anxious" or "I'm depressed today" and "I suffer from depression" are very wide--but people here option 2 and their brain filters to option 1)--if you think meds may be beneficial (especially if you're considering them for more than just the situational thing), ask a doc for a referral--don't wait for them to grasp the difference, demand the difference.

(and for the situational things, there's a lot of good to be had from asking for meds)

/soapbox.

[FJismyheadship]

Wait, so you can get medication specifically for panic attacks?

Geez I'm clearly seeing the wrong doctor.

Can I tell my PCP or do I have to see a psych doctor? Cause we have TWO psych doctors and they both suck.

[singsingsing]

Wait, so you can get medication specifically for panic attacks?

Geez I'm clearly seeing the wrong doctor.

Can I tell my PCP or do I have to see a psych doctor? Cause we have TWO psych doctors and they both suck.

I didn't realize it was possible either until I went to my doctor in desperation because I had been having almost non-stop back-to-back panic attacks for days, maybe weeks, and could barely function. I thought she was going to tell me it was either long term anti-anxiety meds or nothing. Imagine my surprise when she prescribed me lorazepam (ativan). You only take it when you need it (either when you're having a panic attack or you feel one coming on, or you're going into a situation that you know will provoke one). I was on the lowest dose and hardly ever took it, but it made such an enormous difference. It didn't make me feel weird or loopy, just normal. Talk to your family doctor, that's who prescribed it for me.

[WonderingInWA]

Wait, so you can get medication specifically for panic attacks?

Geez I'm clearly seeing the wrong doctor.

Can I tell my PCP or do I have to see a psych doctor? Cause we have TWO psych doctors and they both suck.

A medical doctor in the states can prescribe any medication for you. No psychiatrist required. Not all docs want to do that, but they are medically licensed to.

[Chowder Head]

Wait, so you can get medication specifically for panic attacks?

Geez I'm clearly seeing the wrong doctor.

Can I tell my PCP or do I have to see a psych doctor? Cause we have TWO psych doctors and they both suck.

I saw my family doctor.

[Fallgirl30]

Has anyone seen the two pics on Nolan's FB? 2 pics of books, signed by DPIAR, but also written is "purchased by DP, not Nolan." This is in two separate pictures. Weird. Someone made a comment "DP is creepy as f*ck."

I guess Nolan just would not be intimidated, or deterred by DPIAR. Looks as though it drove the tool crazy!

[love2scrap]

Nolan added the part "not Nolan"

However it is creepy as fuck that DPIAR called her darling.

[CloakNDagger]

Has anyone seen the two pics on Nolan's FB? 2 pics of books, signed by DPIAR, but also written is "purchased by DP, not Nolan." This is in two separate pictures. Weird. Someone made a comment "DP is creepy as f*ck."

I guess Nolan just would not be intimidated, or deterred by DPIAR. Looks as though it drove the tool crazy!

It would seem that based on what I've heard, that the idea is for her to be painted as a sexual predator. Of course that would then beg the question why he was treating her so well if she was being such a bad girl all along, and why he would be giving her nice gifts.

[MrsFoxx]

Nolan added the part "not Nolan"

However it is creepy as fuck that DPIAR called her darling.

This whole thing is creepy as fuck.

[DomWackTroll]

Nolan added the part "not Nolan"

However it is creepy as fuck that DPIAR called her darling.

But if you look closely at the second photo, you'll see it says, "Anna's Darlings' Birthday Celebration" with the apostrophe on the end of the word "Darlings." Weren't the Darlings a VF family? I know I've heard that surname before.

There is a Theo Darling who joined the Homeschoolers Anonymous page on FB:

facebook.com/HomeschoolersAnonymous

Theo is apparently a Satanist now, which kinda makes sense if he's had close contact with Doug.

ETA: Also, Lourdes' FB page says her birthday is April 11, which doesn't fit the date Doug wrote on the book in the first pic, October 17. The two dates written in the second photo appear to be in a different handwriting (Lourdes'?)

[love2scrap]

DWT, You're probably right about one of those darling comments.... But the other one either referred to her as darling or DPIAT is terrible at phrasing....

He is a fucking creepy tool.

[DomWackTroll]

R.C. Jr. on FB: "The bitter irony if Popes John & John Paul are aware of their canonization for leading the religion that lead them & millions more to hell."

facebook.com/rcsprouljr/posts/10202067604831111?stream_ref=10

Yes, one of them even tried to hide the crimes of sexual predators. Can you imagine???

[DomWackTroll]

Look who was at James McDonald's church over the weekend:

facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10203422981673723&set=a.1633502075924.92290.1187837890&type=1&stream_ref=10

"Pastor Ronald Nalera discussing his ministry in Uganda. Pray for him."

Ummmmm… No.

[Sobeknofret]

In another session Chris Jeub also discussed the lawsuit (as well as a little tift with Kevin Swanson about Homeschoolers Anonymous - I will start a thread about that one). He said that the Patriarchy Movement is dying. Even Swanson has expressed his doubts about some parts of it. He also said that everyone is pretty worried about all this. I got the impression all the bad publicity is making it harder for them to fly under the radar and they don't like it.

Waiting anxiously- Kevin Swanson is one of my favorite love-to-hate fundies.

[HereticHick]

Trynn, I've found that Dramamine, which is over the counter & has a bit of a sedative in it, is enormously helpful to me on flights.

I find flights to be those rare occasions when I can sit quietly, listen to/read a book for more than 30 minutes at a time, watch a movie & maybe have a semi-decent glass of wine. Its a mini vacation in itself. If someone in the next seat tried to witness to me, swear to god I'd scratch their eyes out.

[RandomTrivia]

I finally brought it up with my doctor because I had been having what-proved-to-be panic attacks. They were scaring me to death, so I finally overcame my embarrassment and went to my doctor. I really don't take them (Xanax pills ) much, but it makes me feel much better to know they are there. Flying and visits to the dentist are the situations I am most likely to experience a panic attack. I tell very few folks I take them, but I wanted to share my experience on here in the event it might help someone.

My dentist gave me a prescription for a small dose of diazepam (5 mg?) a few years back, to use when there were drills involved. This was after he was doing the first filling (I was a new patient), the drill made a funny noise, and I guess I about levitated out of the chair. And that filling ended up larger than he'd intended. I don't know if it's specifically a panic attack, or just massive amounts of anxiety. I'm okay with cleanings, but when the drill comes out, I pretty much sit there and wait for it to hurt, even though I can't remember it ever actually happening. The diazepam takes that away.

[starfish]

I didn't realize it was possible either until I went to my doctor in desperation because I had been having almost non-stop back-to-back panic attacks for days, maybe weeks, and could barely function. I thought she was going to tell me it was either long term anti-anxiety meds or nothing. Imagine my surprise when she prescribed me lorazepam (ativan). You only take it when you need it (either when you're having a panic attack or you feel one coming on, or you're going into a situation that you know will provoke one). I was on the lowest dose and hardly ever took it, but it made such an enormous difference. It didn't make me feel weird or loopy, just normal. Talk to your family doctor, that's who prescribed it for me.

Me, exactly, except my doc gave me Xanax. And it doesn't make me feel weird or strange or even "good", just sort of functional and it puts the panic attacks at bay. I am thankful for it-it made a big difference for me as well.

Now back to snarking......

[Fallgirl30]

Nolan added the part "not Nolan"

However it is creepy as fuck that DPIAR called her darling.

Oh, ok. I DID wonder if that was the case. Yes, you're right, still creepy as f*uck.

[Essentially Oiled]

First-time poster, long-time lurker here. I have a relative in the south that's been deeply mired in patriarchy. I've watched their family suffer because of it through the years. I mean truly horrible stuff. The oldest children are now jumping ship, thankfully, but they're scarred and damaged. They are angry, and rightly so.

The parents are disgusted with DPIAT/R and even more disgusted by his defenders. I find this encouraging. For the first time they are beginning to question things, but are having trouble letting go of patriarchy entirely. They've invested so much into patriarchy that admitting they were wrong would be admitting that all their "righteous suffering" was for naught.

But I do think the entire sordid system is imploding. It may take a while, but the foundations are cracking big-time. For the sake of the children still being abused under patriarchy, please never stop exposing the ugly.

[Sister Mozz]

But if you look closely at the second photo, you'll see it says, "Anna's Darlings' Birthday Celebration" with the apostrophe on the end of the word "Darlings." Weren't the Darlings a VF family? I know I've heard that surname before.

There is a Theo Darling who joined the Homeschoolers Anonymous page on FB:

facebook.com/HomeschoolersAnonymous

Theo is apparently a Satanist now, which kinda makes sense if he's had close contact with Doug.

ETA: Also, Lourdes' FB page says her birthday is April 11, which doesn't fit the date Doug wrote on the book in the first pic, October 17. The two dates written in the second photo appear to be in a different handwriting (Lourdes'?)

Their anniversary is April 11, but I have no idea when her birthday is.

[Elinor]

Their anniversary is April 11, but I have no idea when her birthday is.

Her birthday is 10 October 1984, per the Texas Birth Index.

[Sugarbob]

First-time poster, long-time lurker here. I have a relative in the south that's been deeply mired in patriarchy. I've watched their family suffer because of it through the years. I mean truly horrible stuff. The oldest children are now jumping ship, thankfully, but they're scarred and damaged. They are angry, and rightly so.

The parents are disgusted with DPIAT/R and even more disgusted by his defenders. I find this encouraging. For the first time they are beginning to question things, but are having trouble letting go of patriarchy entirely. They've invested so much into patriarchy that admitting they were wrong would be admitting that all their "righteous suffering" was for naught.

But I do think the entire sordid system is imploding. It may take a while, but the foundations are cracking big-time. For the sake of the children still being abused under patriarchy, please never stop exposing the ugly.

Your username made me laugh out loud. :D Brilliant! Wish I had thought of it. I'm also a long time lurker and very recent first-time poster, so welcome fellow newbie! :)

[DomWackTroll]

Her birthday is 10 October 1984, per the Texas Birth Index.

Oh, I thought that was her birthday on her FB page... Well, that makes more sense. It probably was a birthday gift from Doug. But I still think "Darlings'" refers to a family they were with that day. I know Doug was incredibly stupid and careless on the internets, but to write to her as "Darling" in a book, in his handwriting? I doubt he would do that. And who is "Anna"?