Alyssa Bates and John Webster Engagement (now confirmed)

[xReems]

Kelly recently responded to a question on her blog regarding John and Alyssa. She responded with the following:

 

 

Quote

Dear Sophie,

Alyssa took several college classes at Crown, but seems to be distracted for wedding planning now…lol. We’re anticipating a spring wedding. She works at a local florist (saving money for the wedding- haha) Love, Kelly

 

I'm assuming an engagement is around the corner if Alyssa is already planning for a spring wedding. Figured a new thread should be created for this.

 

I still don't get why the rush to marriage when she's just 19 years old. I wouldn't be surprised if John pops the question come Valentines Day, however.

[singsingsing]

I posted about that comment in the Duggar/Bates predictions thread. It almost makes it sound like they're engaged already, but I'm guessing they're not. Alyssa was planning her wedding even before she was officially courting. I would be SHOCKED if they didn't get engaged on Valentine's Day. Spring seems so soon. Oh well... at least Alyssa seems really happy and eager to get married, not like she's being pushed or pressured into it.

[FloraDoraDolly]

Nice to hear that Alyssa has a job. Weren't she and John the ones who were "dating with a purpose" rather than courting? Plus he's not a total fundie, more fundie lite.

[Guest]

I feel like their terminology is all mixed up. The "getting to know you" phase is what most would consider dating. Then "courting" is like engagement - they've already decided it, they're going to get married. "Engagement" is simply planning a wedding, which only takes like 4 months tops. Then they get to be newlyweds for probably 10 months before they have a baby, then they're absolutely full fledged adults who know everything about marriage and raising children, simply because they were able to create and birth one child.

If Alyssa gets married now, at 19, and goes the QF route, assuming he inherits Kelly's fertility, she could easily have 20+. Something makes me doubt she will.

[Justme]

What is with these fundies taking time off school/work to plan a wedding. Sure, they invite a ton of people, but the receptions are rather "blah". :? Do they search every store for the best buy on olives, cold cuts or nuts??? There is no band to hire, no seating plan, no booze to buy, no entertainment (unless you count reading bible verses).....

[nausicaa]

In some ways I worry about Alyssa the most of the Bates girls. She seems to be the type of girl who loves girly things as well as planning ahead, so she probably has been planning this wedding in detail since she was ten, and couldn't wait for it to happen even before she met John. And I'm sure being courted by a Congressman's son is really flattering so she is swept up in that right now.

But first, she is only 19. And secondly, she seems kinda spunky, social, and wants a little more glamour in her life. I.e., not someone who would be happy having twenty kids (and all of the physical tolls that takes) and being confined to the traditional duties of cooking and cleaning and living on a budget.

I just keep seeing a girl who doesn't understand what she is getting herself into.

[nausicaa]

What is with these fundies taking time off school/work to plan a wedding. Sure, they invite a ton of people, but the receptions are rather "blah". :? Do they search every store for the best buy on olives, cold cuts or nuts??? There is no band to hire, no seating plan, no booze to buy, no entertainment (unless you count reading bible verses).....

I wonder about that too. I knew several women in grad school planning a wedding while writing their thesis (granted, I thought they were crazy). But in Alyssa's case, I think this wedding will be a bit more elaborate, considering her pinterest page and John's father's position. And I think the short engagements add to the intensity. It's hard to plan an event (however low budget) for 400 people in a few months!

[thekate]

Nice to hear that Alyssa has a job. Weren't she and John the ones who were "dating with a purpose" rather than courting? Plus he's not a total fundie, more fundie lite.

Fundie lite? The Congressman is pretty cozy with ATI. I'd call that fundie.

[anjulibai]

In some ways I worry about Alyssa the most of the Bates girls. She seems to be the type of girl who loves girly things as well as planning ahead, so she probably has been planning this wedding in detail since she was ten, and couldn't wait for it to happen even before she met John. And I'm sure being courted by a Congressman's son is really flattering so she is swept up in that right now.

But first, she is only 19. And secondly, she seems kinda spunky, social, and wants a little more glamour in her life. I.e., not someone who would be happy having twenty kids (and all of the physical tolls that takes) and being confined to the traditional duties of cooking and cleaning and living on a budget.

I just keep seeing a girl who doesn't understand what she is getting herself into.

I agree. She's very worldly, for a girl of that age group, and if she'd had a normal life, she'd have spent months getting ready for homecoming dances and proms, and been involved in decorating her high school gym for Valentine's Day dance. Instead, the only focus for that teeny-bopper energy she's got is weddings.

I just don't see her as pregnant every year and spending her time in the kitchen and the laundry room. And yes, given her age and her mother's fertility, she could easily have 20 kids before her reproductive years end.

Hopefully, she and John will wait for kids, but I doubt it.

BTW, does anyone know how old Kelly and Gil are? I've always wondered how old they were when they started having kids, as that would give a good indication of how many years all the girls could have of child-bearing.

[singsingsing]

I believe Kelly is 46 or 47, and I think Gil is the same age.

Edit: So Kelly was about 21 when she had her first child, and remember, there were no twins. Alyssa could easily have 20 kids if she inherited her mother's fertility. I really hope they at least try to go the NFP route.

[Tangy Bee]

Yeah but it's John's dad who is the congressman. Did I spell that right? John does not appear to be in politics and I wonder what his family thinks of the Bates. I don't think John will wait until Alyssa turns 20 later this year. If my brother was talking about marrying a 19 year old, I might have a "small" issue. But then again, I bet his family adores her and can't wait to convert her to a less restrictive christian life.

[sunshine]

Well, she knows what she wants and should go after it. I think John runs the family business, so I hope he has money put aside.

[Tangy Bee]

Well, she knows what she wants and should go after it. I think John runs the family business, so I hope he has money put aside.

What's the family business?

[Mela99]

Who will get there first - Jessa or Alyssa? I think Alyssa

[anjulibai]

I think Alyssa, too, though I wish she'd wait another year.

[anjulibai]

I believe Kelly is 46 or 47, and I think Gil is the same age.

Edit: So Kelly was about 21 when she had her first child, and remember, there were no twins. Alyssa could easily have 20 kids if she inherited her mother's fertility. I really hope they at least try to go the NFP route.

Kelly also had four miscarriages, two or three before they started using progesterone. If she hadn't had those miscarriages, they'd have had more kids now...

Damn, Alyssa really could have 20 kids.

[xReems]

Who will get there first - Jessa or Alyssa? I think Alyssa

My money is also on Alyssa. If the girl is taking time off this semester to plan a spring wedding, than we're expecting sometime between March-May.

It wouldn't surprise me if Jessa gets engaged in the next 6 months or so, however.

[sunshine]

What's the family business?

I think it deals with air conditioners or central units.

[veron1que]

Kelly recently responded to a question on her blog regarding John and Alyssa. She responded with the following:

I'm of the belief that fundie couples are just like everyone else. You get to a point in a relationship at which you want to be physical. If you believe its wrong to have sex before marriage, you get married.

[Ellimenopy]

My money is also on Alyssa. If the girl is taking time off this semester to plan a spring wedding, than we're expecting sometime between March-May.

It wouldn't surprise me if Jessa gets engaged in the next 6 months or so, however.

I'm pretty sure Jessa is already engaged, but damn is Alyssa trying to catch up!

[RosyDaisy]

I feel like their terminology is all mixed up

No it's not. It's the same shit but with flowery wording.

[nausicaa]

I agree. She's very worldly, for a girl of that age group, and if she'd had a normal life, she'd have spent months getting ready for homecoming dances and proms, and been involved in decorating her high school gym for Valentine's Day dance. Instead, the only focus for that teeny-bopper energy she's got is weddings.

Yes, Alyssa Bates would have totally rocked at prom committee! :lol:

[ljohnson2006]

Alyssa dropped her college classes to plan a wedding. What were Kelly and Gil thinking to let her do this? I thought they gave two shits about their kids having a good education? Guess not. Disappointed.

[formergothardite]

Alyssa dropped her college classes to plan a wedding. What were Kelly and Gil thinking to let her do this? I thought they gave two shits about their kids having a good education? Guess not. Disappointed.

Pretty sure getting married and popping out an army of little ATI warriors is way more important than college in their eyes.

[nelliebelle1197]

Yeah but it's John's dad who is the congressman. Did I spell that right? John does not appear to be in politics and I wonder what his family thinks of the Bates. I don't think John will wait until Alyssa turns 20 later this year. If my brother was talking about marrying a 19 year old, I might have a "small" issue. But then again, I bet his family adores her and can't wait to convert her to a less restrictive christian life.

The Websters are part of ATI. I am not sure why people think they are not.