Have more babies or die trying (Kelly C.)

[Hisey]

Kelly wrote one of her usual posts about how the world doesn't respect her large family, boo hoo.

Then a mom writes in. A mom with a HEART CONDITION that worsens as she ages. Her doctor has told her not to have any more kids, because of this heart condition. She is wondering what to do.

What is your opinion on continuing to have children even if the mothers life is at risk? Like, lets say you can get pregnant (that area works wonderfully) but you were born with a bad heart and with age it just gets worse? Part of me is like, God gave doctors to guide us in situations like this but then the other part feels like I do not have enough faith in God because I am not trusting his will for continuing child bearing (which is against doctors orders). I read the Word, pray and try to find an answer but can not figure out anything, I am just so torn.

Surprise, surprise--Kelly just got an email *yesterday* from a mom with a heart condition. This mom defied doctors orders, and everything was fine.

I will tell you this though: I got an email from a sweet (young)mom just yesterday who had 6 c-sections, had her tubes tied, and then a reversal with 2 more babies. Before she became pregnant with her last, the doctors told her she had a heart condition and put her on meds and told her not to get pregnant.

She got pregnant, took herself off the meds, had a healthy pregnancy and no more heart condition–she believes the Lord healed her through her pregnancy.

She also shared some other good food for thought, like the fact that we are willing to die for our born children but we don’t think about our unborn/children-to-be the same way.

I admit, that’s a hard one for me to swallow, but I hear the truth in it. It’s almost akin to the some of the abortion mindset in that we value born people but not those unborn.

I am particularly amazed how Kelly points out that we'd lose our live for our living children, but we treat the unborn differently? She wonders, isn't that like supporting abortion? No, she's not trying to take sides here

Is Kelly telling this mom to risk her life? That if she doesn't then it's the same as supporting abortion? I am speechless, frankly. What if this mom follows Kelly's advice and drops dead?

Edited to add a word or two.

[Hane]

Oh, this makes me spit nails. One of my friends, the mother of one child, later developed breast cancer at the age of 32, but was treated successfully. She decided not to have a second child out of concerns that the hormonal changes of pregnancy might cause her remission to end. She told me, "I figured my daughter needed a mother more than she needed a baby brother."

[doggie]

A little pointless to die for your unborn child now ain't it?

[Arete]

I just can't get past my disgust and loathing of women who would trust life and death medical decisions to Kelly as opposed to their doctor. I'm also sick of hearing that this is what their faith tells them to do. No, it does NOT! Stop listening to grifters interpret the Bible.

It ought to be against the law to be that stupid.

[dramallama]

Yeah, 'cause, you know, it's not like the unborn child is going to die if you have a heart attack and die during pregnancy. Then two are dead, and for what? Kelly is an idiot and an asshole.

[ILoveJellybeans]

I think it is very selfish to try and get pregnant when doctors have told you that getting pregnant again is likely to kill you. Especially if you already have children-they need their mother, and it would be selfish to risk these kids growing up motherless because you wanted to have another kid.

The problem with being willing to die for your unborn child is that they are kinda dependent on you for survival. If you die, the baby dies too. Then both die, instead of one lives and the other not exist at all. That's not very pro life, as if she goes ahead and conceives, but dies, that would be killing a fetus.

If you do really want a child but are medically unable to carry a pregnancy without risking your health, theres always other options like adoption.

This woman could die because of Kelly.

[happy atheist]

How young can the "sweet (young) mom" possibly be if she's had 8 pregnancies, plus time in the middle to get her tubes tied and untied?

This smells like bullshit.

[NotALoserLikeYou]

6 c-sections and some doctor reversed her tubal? I doubt it.

[3 ring circus]

Oh, this makes me spit nails. One of my friends, the mother of one child, later developed breast cancer at the age of 32, but was treated successfully. She decided not to have a second child out of concerns that the hormonal changes of pregnancy might cause her remission to end. She told me, "I figured my daughter needed a mother more than she needed a baby brother."

Makes me mad too. I have a friend whose co-workers wife died during childbirth after being told not to have anymore kids. The baby survived. The husband now has a newborn and a 2 year old. Yes, it took them both to get pregnant, but she wasn't totally honest about their ability to get pregnant.

[ThisOlGirl]

So Young Mom's heart condition just went away or was "cured" by her pregnancy? Is that even possible? I was always under the impression that once you had a heart condition, you had it, and depending on what that condition was, you could only manage it.

Kelly's an asshole. Too bad pregnancy doesn't cure that particular condition.

[Caribou]

The problem with being willing to die for your unborn child is that they are kinda dependent on you for survival. If you die, the baby dies too.

Not if you live in Texas

[halfheartedheroine]

So Young Mom's heart condition just went away or was "cured" by her pregnancy? Is that even possible? I was always under the impression that once you had a heart condition, you had it, and depending on what that condition was, you could only manage it.

Kelly's an asshole. Too bad pregnancy doesn't cure that particular condition.

I've heard some autoimmune disorders actually improve if a woman gets pregnant, because the immune system naturally gets a bit tamped down in order to not identify the fetus as a foreign item. (although I've also heard that it's split among "improve/decline considerably/stay exactly the same", so that might depend too much on disease/severity to be relevant) But I've never heard a doctor say, "Oh, right, I've written you a prescription for a fetus to fix that problem, kthnxbai." You'd think heart problems would almost always be worsened with pregnancy because the overall blood volume increases (right?)...

[Jana814]

6 c-sections and some doctor reversed her tubal? I doubt it.

Same here!

[Fallgirl30]

What I don't understand about the first woman's letter, is that since the doctor told her no more babies, wouldn't she take that as the definitive answer, coming from God? I am a Christian, and my Bible study is doing a series on hearing from God. Messages can be sent in different forms, i.e. prayer, dreams, direct messages, etc. If I was THAT woman, I would have taken what that doctor told me as my answer. You don't have to be Moses on the mountaintop in order to hear from God. I mean, what more does this chick need to hear?

OR, these people don't have an ounce of discernment in their bodies, and it's all just Babby Olympics. Meaning, the mentality of 'I can have more babies than the woman in the pew in front of me, and the next one over, and so on.' So maybe they aren't leaving it in the Lord's hands at all, because they don't seem to ever want to stop. God allows people to do stupid stuff all the time. So, basically the signs they look for, is that the next baby kills them, and that is the ONLY one they understand. Lovely. :angry-banghead:

Edited to add more.

[doggie]

Yeah, 'cause, you know, it's not like the unborn child is going to die if you have a heart attack and die during pregnancy. Then two are dead, and for what? Kelly is an idiot and an asshole.

well if you are in Texas they will try to keep your caracas alive to keep the fetus going.

[dramallama]

well if you are in Texas they will try to keep your caracas alive to keep the fetus going.

Well, yes, and that's its own brand of fucked-up, but in general and barring outlier cases, unless you're near-term and have a team ready to do a crash c-section as you're dying, the fetus is going to die before it even gets to the point of using a corpse as an incubator.

[darkplumaged]

So according to Kelly's "logic," women should be willing to die not only for their unborn children, but for as-yet-unconceived children? :roll:

[dpndetfarm]

I didn't think christians were supposed to make shit up.

This Kelly girl is going to hell for inventing the 6 birth,

c section, tubal ligation and reversal, heart problem, miracle cure woman.

For Pete's sake, even Days of our Lives never had a plot like that!

[RosyDaisy]

Bitch, please! What bothers me the most about you is that hundreds of people died in our state during the tornado outbreak in April 2011, and you said it was a blessing. WFT...really, WTF? :wtf: I had 2 friends who died that day, my town and many, many others in Alabama will never be the same. There are people who still have nightmares, and have panic attacks every time they hear thunder. What did you do? You made it all about you. So, STFU you crazy bitch! :angry-cussingblack: I don't give a flying fuck how many kids you have, and I certainly don't wish bad things to happen to you or your family. But, I've got a feeling you don't share those sentiments when it comes to non-like minded people. :disgust:

[love2scrap]

So according to Kelly's "logic," women should be willing to die not only for their unborn children, but for as-yet-unconceived children? :roll:

Soooo basically women shouldnt even DIE because they arent giving the eggs in their ovaries the chance to be conceived?

Double :roll:

[teachergirl]

I don't think this mindset belongs to only Kelly.....I hate how cavalier so many of them are about their multiple miscarriages, lengthy bedrest and NICU visits. The best way to keep your theology going is to convince women that their God will protect them no matter what. And the ultimate irony ( I think) is the huge amount of money that these risky births and pregnancies cost and most of them have no health insurance. Who do they think pays for that?

Kelly is a moron.

[lilah]

And it never even occurs to kelly to suggest fostercare or adoption because those hypothetical unborn kids are more important.

[Jana814]

Makes me mad too. I have a friend whose co-workers wife died during childbirth after being told not to have anymore kids. The baby survived. The husband now has a newborn and a 2 year old. Yes, it took them both to get pregnant, but she wasn't totally honest about their ability to get pregnant.

How sad.

[Jana814]

And it never even occurs to kelly to suggest fostercare or adoption because those hypothetical unborn kids are more important.

I think that is the same logic for a lot of Fundie families (foster & adoption).

[acheronbeach]

Kelly actually makes me feel ill every time I read her blog. Her advice literally may kill this woman.

Kelly is not a Biblical scholar - or a scholar of anything, really. She has, at best, a mediocre education, and her blog entries reflect only a very basic knowledge of history and hermaneutics. And yet, she has decided she is a wise enough Biblical scholar to decide another person's fate.