The truth about "modesty" dawns

[JesusFightClub]

Suppose I made a list of the clothes that over 50% of the guys in the survey thought were "immodest", and I avoided wearing those. Well, what about some OTHER piece of clothing that only 30% of guys said was immodest- should I avoid wearing that too? Do I care about that 30% of the guys? Gotta care about them- you know, Christian women are supposed to help out our brothers. Okay, what about something that 10% said was immodest? Where do you draw the line? If you try to go all the way and only wear things that were okayed by 100% of the guys, well... then you can't wear anything. And apparently THAT'S immodest too.

The only solution is to not be a girl.

tellmewhytheworldisweird.blogspot.co.uk/2013/01/the-story-of-me-and-modesty.html

[gardenvarietycitizen]

No kidding. Ever since Eve, it's all womens' fault. Eff that noise.

[AnywhereButHere]

My vote then is to just go around naked. If I can't please everybody, I may as well please nobody. That way nobody can claim discrimination. Or hey, maybe we should just all go back to fig leaves. If it was good enough for Adam and Eve, it should be good enough for us. It's just following the Bible...

[sarahjames3]

This really gets under my skin - just yesterday ate lunch at Chick-Fil-A (not a politcal statement - I like the waffle fries!) and a family of Pentecostals came in. Women dressed in long denim skirts with long hair or hair pinned up in a bun and men and boys who were dressed just as anyone else. I don't get it - at least with Amish and Mennonites it's equal opportunity odd attire!

[eowyn1217]

I don't get it. Women, I believe, were created as the "crown" of God's creation...why would He expect us to cover everything, then, that makes us beautiful? I mean...don't go naked. ;) But don't hide in a trash bag, and then try to tell me that you're "respecting" women. No, all you're doing is bowing down to some butthole somewhere who decided to make a religion around sexism.

[tralala]

I threw myself into the modesty movement as teen. I fell for the BS that the poor menz just couldn't help themselves and I had to cover up to stop them from tripping up on their spiritual journey~. Heh.

Then I started reading about feminism and the main theme I was noticing was that such expectations on women's clothing were just ways to keep women the lesser sex. It was suddenly their responsibility because men couldn't control themselves? That's bullshit. I take responsibility for myself, and men are certainly capable of doing the same.

[Blahblah]

And here lies the way to burkhas and niqabs.

[August]

Anyone got the link to that photo of the men leering at the women in burkas?

Here's another silly thing about it. In Eden god wanted men and women naked, right? Then men and women chose to cover up and it made god sad. So wouldn't god be happier if we were naked again?

[bananacat]

My vote then is to just go around naked. If I can't please everybody, I may as well please nobody. That way nobody can claim discrimination. Or hey, maybe we should just all go back to fig leaves. If it was good enough for Adam and Eve, it should be good enough for us. It's just following the Bible...

Honestly, I would say I'm nudist-sympathic. What's immodest is based on what we're not used to seeing. I remember when I was in high school, I would get really hot and bothered the first warm day of spring when the boys wore short-sleeve shirts after months of sweaters. I've never been that into arms, but it was really strong for a week and then faded as I got used to it. If we were all naked it would be weird for a week and then everyone would just get used to it and move on.

[freesarah88]

I did some similar analysis of the modesty survey when I was in my fundie/fundie lite days (not sure what the distinction is between the two). You really can't win. I am disturbed by what some men find inappropriate. :pink-shock:

[ILoveJellybeans]

At this rate, fundies will start wearing burqas. I bet theyre kicking themselves that the "eeeevil" Muslims got there first.

[Mela99]

No matter what women wear, it's gonna be wrong . . .

[ari_belle]

"Whatever a horny teenage boy thinks when he looks at a random woman is clearly the authoritative perspective on the matter."

So true. Also, I'd like to add as a women, it is a stumbling block for me if I see an attractive man dressed like a slob. It makes me want to barf. So men must all take showers and practice good grooming. Savvy?

[meep]

This really gets under my skin - just yesterday ate lunch at Chick-Fil-A (not a politcal statement - I like the waffle fries!) and a family of Pentecostals came in. Women dressed in long denim skirts with long hair or hair pinned up in a bun and men and boys who were dressed just as anyone else. I don't get it - at least with Amish and Mennonites it's equal opportunity odd attire!

That has always been my main gripe. If they want to be all holy and modest, fine. But I'd expect EVERYONE to play by the same rules. Complete BS that in these circles, it's only the women who have to adjust. No adjustments for men because who men have urges, it's considered natural and uncontrollable. If women have thoughts and urges, it's a sin.

[martian]

Here's a broken link to the original Modesty Survey: therebelution.com/modestysurvey/

I'm going to dive in and swim around. Just at first glance, though, that petition on the front page pisses me right off.

As a Christian guy with a deep appreciation for feminine modesty, I hereby affirm and commend the following biblical truths to my sisters in Christ:

- Please, approach the survey as a resource, not a list of rules.

- Always honor your parents above the results of the survey. (Ephesians 6:1-3)

- Seek personal feedback on your attire from the godly men and women in your life.

- Remember, modesty is first and foremost a matter of the heart, not the wardrobe.

- Faithfully pursue the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit. (1 Peter 3:4)

- Let your good works outshine your outward appearance. (1 Timothy 2:10)

- Dress for the glory of God. (1 Corinthians 10:31)

So, guys 12(!!!) and up join together to add their male authority to the message this survey sends Christian girls and women. And I do mean "and up". Lots of older guys seem to have signed. I spotted one in his seventies and all I could think was "Creeper!"

I did a search and didn't find any Duggars or Bates among the signers. But to be fair, anybody could probably sign any name. I'm pondering the ethics of adding some choice, but subtle, additions to the roll.

[Peppercorn]

I wanted to sign that as Tim Tebow but couldn't figure out how to get it past suspicious eyes. Timothy T. Bowe maybe?

Never thought of masquerading as a Duggar or Bates boy. Hmmm....

[Peppercorn]

"Whatever a horny teenage boy thinks when he looks at a random woman is clearly the authoritative perspective on the matter."

Indeed! :doh:

Btw, your avatar makes me chuckle devilishly.

[rward]

I remember that survey. A lot of teenage boys admitting that seeing THEIR SISTER in a tank top makes them feel a bit funny.

It's not the clothes that are the problem, darling.

[JesusFightClub]

I remember that survey. A lot of teenage boys admitting that seeing THEIR SISTER in a tank top makes them feel a bit funny.

It's not the clothes that are the problem, darling.

Oh fuck, I remember that :pink-shock:

Also all the men blaming women for letting their breasts bounce while walking. :doh:

[AnywhereButHere]

Anyone got the link to that photo of the men leering at the women in burkas?

Here's another silly thing about it. In Eden god wanted men and women naked, right? Then men and women chose to cover up and it made god sad. So wouldn't god be happier if we were naked again?

http://phoenixandolivebranch.files.word ... .jpg?w=630

I don't know if this is what you meant, but it is funny (in a twisted way). Just goes to show that the style of clothing doesn't do much to deter the "evil" thoughts. What, are they turned on by a glimpse of heel?

[ILoveJellybeans]

I remember that survey. A lot of teenage boys admitting that seeing THEIR SISTER in a tank top makes them feel a bit funny.

It's not the clothes that are the problem, darling.

I think its being a fundie thats the problem here. Theyve spent so much time teaching them that bodies are sinful that they find all of these body parts sinful and exciting when other people would just be going "Meh, its an arm"

Im suprised with all the isolation, that there isnt more incest among fundies, as most of the time their family is the only people they see regularly.

[JesusFightClub]

Also, is it only me, or does anyone else find the constant refrain of "ask your dad/brothers if an outfit is immodest or not" really weird?

My dad is my dad. He's not the guardian of my sex appeal (such as it is) and neither are my brothers. What you're essentially asking them there is "If we weren't related, would you think about having sex with me when you see me wearing this outfit"? I don't know about fundies, but that is certainly not a question I'd like to ask my relatives :pink-shock: and I don't think they'd appreciate me asking such a question.

[debrand]

Modestly also comes off a bit conceited. Am I supposed to believe that I-a middle aged grandmother-somehow turns young men into puddles of lust because they glimpsed my knees?

[OkToBeTakei]

Modestly also comes off a bit conceited. Am I supposed to believe that I-a middle aged grandmother-somehow turns young men into puddles of lust because they glimpsed my knees?

ABSOLUTELY!

Flash them there knees Granny :lol:

[treehugger]

I went to the actual survey because I could not believe such a thing actually existed :shock:

One particular gem stuck out at me:

Seeing a girl's chest bounce when she is walking or running is a stumbling block.

An overwhelming 76.5% agreed. And that just really ticks me off. I've been a 38D since I was a teenager. It was the bane of my existence because so many guys ogled me ALL THE TIME. My chest has always bounced, I mean, hello! What was I supposed to do? Stand still and never move?

But, one of the commenters on the survey - a wise chap of 16 years has the solution:

This is mostly an issue with undersized and push-up bras. General tip: Uncomfortable bras probably weren't designed to be uncomfortable, but rather to attract guys.