The Pearls On Gun Safety.

[slickcat79]

I wouldn't be the slightest bit surprised to find that Michael Pearl has sexually abused his daughters. They barely had enough privacy in his home to be able to change their clothes and shower, and he could look in on them whenever he wanted. It's like he wanted to see them naked. Plus a lot of his tales of child training abuse read like rape fantasies, except the subject is little children. He is a sick fuck.

[treehugger]

:angry-steamingears: How the hell can anyone read anything written by this psycho and his doormat, and think it is at all remotely okay? Seriously. Anything I read about him just makes me want to puke - and then curl up in a corner and rock back and forth and weep for humanity.

[argypargy]

Are the Pearls anti-choice? If so, they're part of the hypocritical pro-life pro-gun crowd. And if 1 of the 10 Commandements is to not kill, then how do they explain soldiers during wartime and police? * sorry if I'm a bit off-topic :embarrassed: * I'm not anti-gun, I'm just amazed at the amount of fundies who're pro-life and pro-gun. It just doesn't make any Goddamned sense! :pull-hair:

I was behind a car the other day that had an "Abortion Stops a Beating Heart" sticker. Right above that sticker? A NRA sticker. Hypocritical much?

Classic right-wing nutter mindset. I wish I had a marker, so I could have written under the "Abortion Stops a Beating Heart" sticker, "...and guns do, too".

[debrand]

:angry-steamingears: How the hell can anyone read anything written by this psycho and his doormat, and think it is at all remotely okay? Seriously. Anything I read about him just makes me want to puke - and then curl up in a corner and rock back and forth and weep for humanity.

Before the death of the three children that have been attributed to his methods, I used to come across more people who defended the Pearls. Most were rabid in their support. I don't come across so many-if any- now. What I was told was that the Pearls taught good things like 'tying heart strings'. Tying heart strings means to do positive activities with your child, to include them in your life even if it slows things down. So, a parent who likes to cook or build would make time to have his/her child help with those activities. This is supposed to make it easier for your child to bond with the parent and therefore do what the parent wants. When you combine this with the physical abuse it would probably create a type of stockholm syndrome in the child.

If I was going to create a fictional character who wanted to control another character's mind, I would have the evil one read and apply the Pearls' methods.

Back to why parents follow the Pearls... I think that some people are vulnerable to black and white, easy answers. They want a method to produce perfect children who are happy and will accept Jesus no matter what. Some of these parents are terrified their kids will suffer an eternity of torture so they turn to the Pearls. They don't want independent thinking adults. They want adults who will act in the manner that their parents want without much thought.

[debrand]

I found another article

By the time my boys were four years old, they were taking hunting knives and slicing knives and killing snakes and skinning them up.

This is how Michael tries to make a man of a seven year old boy he was baby sitting for someone. The boy was named after Michael and Pearl thought the child was a sissy. There is a lot of trying to break children's will in the Pearl's writing.

The account is not nearly as bad as some others from the Pearl but the amazing thing is that there was an easier way to teach the child to pick squash. Pearl was paying kids to pick the squash. He could have paid the boy for his three squash and taken all the kids to the store to spend their earnings. When the seven year old saw how much he could have gotten, he would have worked harder next time. There was no need for this battle of wills or mocking the kid in front of other kids. The reason he did not spank the child, I guess, is because the boy was not his own. Like I said, it isn't horrible but it does show the Pearls' mindset toward children

nogreaterjoy.org/video/joy-of-training-squashing-the-sissy/

What did he not want to do? Pick squash. What did he want to do? Get away from the scratchy, itchy stuff. So, what am I going to do? I will do the opposite of everything he wants to do. That’s the way it works. I could have spanked him right there, but that wouldn’t have cured him. Because what he needed was to stay in the squash patch and be eaten by the bugs. That’s what he needed, right?

What he needed was to get tough, and so what I did was, I said well Michael, of all the kids in the community, there are none of them that is crying and whining like you are. He said, “You can’t talk to me this way.†I said, “Look up at me Michael.†He looked up. I said, “I can talk to you anyway I want to, your daddy won’t be back for a week.†[laughter]

He said, “You treat me like I am a dodo.†I said, “Son, you’ve got a long way to go before you get to be a dodo. [laughter] I’d lost patience but I was staying cool. So, I turned a five‑gallon bucket upside down and sat on it. I said, “Me and you are going to stay in this squash patch till the sun goes down or until you smile for five minutes, whichever comes first.â€

Ahhh! He started screaming and really threw a fit then. I was supposed to break down talk to him. I didn’t talk to him. I just sat there. He screamed and screamed, and when he stopped to see how I was doing, I was doing fine. And then I looked up and he was getting red in the face. You know, I was just getting that thought. Man his heart was racing, and his veins were swollen in his little neck, his four‑inch neck, I just knew he was fixing to pass out.

I thought, “That’s it! Let him pass out. Then wake him up and tell him he was smiling for five minutes and then we can go back to the house.†You know, win, win, win. He wouldn’t pass out, he just kept throwing a fit. He stopped in the middle of his fit and said, “When can we go to the house?†I said, “When you smile for five minutes.†So he said OK. [laughter] [mocking noise] I said that’s not good enough, Michael. [laughter] I started laughing at him. I said you really got to smile for five minutes.

So he tried that two or three times, throwing fits in between. Finally after about 20, 30 minutes, I mean it was getting sun come up now and it was getting hot in that squash patch. Humidity steaming up off of it, you know. I mean, it’s hot. So he starts trying to smile. As soon as he started trying to smile, I went along with it and started talking about going inner-tubing down the whitewater creek there a little later. He forgot about his bugs and started laughing with me. I said, been five minutes, you did it, let’s go to the house and eat.

[ILoveJellybeans]

He is proud that he let his four year old use a knife and use it to kill and skin a snake? I think if any of my future kids did that, I would be taking them to see a therapist. No child should take so much joy in killing things.

Seriously? Killing animals at an early age can be a sign that your child will grow up to be a serial killer. Im suprised there isnt a Pearl kid who is a serial killer, what an excellent way to raise a psychopath.

Like every "problem" the Pearls have with kids, there is always a logical, non violent, non shaming solution.

To Train up a Child is 50 Shades of Grey for pedophiles.

[thoughtful]

This is how Michael tries to make a man of a seven year old boy he was baby sitting for someone. The boy was named after Michael and Pearl thought the child was a sissy. There is a lot of trying to break children's will in the Pearl's writing.

The account is not nearly as bad as some others from the Pearl but the amazing thing is that there was an easier way to teach the child to pick squash. Pearl was paying kids to pick the squash. He could have paid the boy for his three squash and taken all the kids to the store to spend their earnings. When the seven year old saw how much he could have gotten, he would have worked harder next time. There was no need for this battle of wills or mocking the kid in front of other kids. The reason he did not spank the child, I guess, is because the boy was not his own. Like I said, it isn't horrible but it does show the Pearls' mindset toward children

nogreaterjoy.org/video/joy-of-training-squashing-the-sissy/

The fact that the child was not his own would not have stopped him, I think -- he has written accounts of Teri whipping other people's children (and perhaps himself, also -- can't remember at the moment).

This story, and your comment bolded above, point out that Pearl's claim that he understands behavioral science is BS. He always chooses pain and/or humiliation, in an attempt at punishment or negative reinforcement (discomfort/aversives are applied, or come from the environment, until the desired behavior is performed, then the discomfort is taken away).

Positive reinforcement would be kind, simple, elegant and likely to be effective. And, of course, if the child still felt it was not worth his while, that would be fine with me, but I doubt if it would be OK with Pearl.

He wants to apply pain, to set up oppositional situations and "win" them.

[slickcat79]

What he needed was to get tough, and so what I did was, I said well Michael, of all the kids in the community, there are none of them that is crying and whining like you are. He said, “You can’t talk to me this way.†I said, “Look up at me Michael.†He looked up. I said, “I can talk to you anyway I want to, your daddy won’t be back for a week.†[laughter]

That's really bothering :? I'd like to think that any parents would be horrified by what the Pearls did to their kids while they were away, but then again they are the kind of people who would leave their young children with Michael Pearl. He writes SO MANY stories of "disciplining" other people's kids, and I don't understand why so many people just give their kids over like that.

[BoomerLynn]

If someone ever treats my child like that, they better hope I never find them.

[debrand]

If someone ever treats my child like that, they better hope I never find them.

I agree but the father of the boy was sick enough to name his child after Michael.

[BoomerLynn]

I agree but the father of the boy was sick enough to name his child after Michael.

Good point. I feel like I spend most of my time wondering WTF is wrong with people. Sigh.

[lizziesmom]

The Pearl principle: "Happy shall he be, that taketh and dasheth thy little ones against the stones." (Psalm 137:9)

[debrand]

I finally found the article that describes the layout of the Pearls' house

Dad built our house so that all the bedroom doors facing the main living room/family room. None of our doors had locks on them until we were older, and then only the girls. We were never allowed to spend time in our rooms behind closed doors. The door could only be closed for five minutes of clothes changing. If a door was closed for a longer period of time, Dad was likely to walk in unannounced to see what we were up to.

nogreaterjoy.org/articles/safeguarding-your-children/

nogreaterjoy.org/articles/certified/

This part is just strange(well, I guess not more strange than the Pearls normally are)

My son-in-law Gabriel and my daughter Rebekah came for a two-week visit. At my request, Gabriel examined the web history on my computer to confirm that I have not visited any porno-sites since the last time he was here.

I never erase my web history. Someone else does it for me after examining it. Someone may ask, “What is wrong, don’t you trust yourself?†My answer to them is, I want my wife to trust me. I want my son-in-law to trust me. I want you to trust me, and I want to make myself accountable to someone—just as you should. I don’t trust anyone who erases his own web history on a regular basis. Just think about it. God keeps a file of all web searches. Nothing is ever erased, except your entire past sins history when you got saved.

[ILoveJellybeans]

I hope he let the bathroom door be closed for more than 5 minutes :(

He just wanted to prove to everyone that he has kicked the habit of BDSM porn and focused his attention on writing books instead.

[Just Not Good]

Everything about the Pearls makes my skin crawl. Glorifying, to your children, lack of compassion for the weak, helpless, or hurting is absolutely the least Christian thing I can think of. One of the things that bugs me most about fundies is the cognitive dissonance between what Jesus said, taught, and did, and what they say, teach, and do.

[sparkles]

I can sort of understand why people are drawn to other fundie ministries like the Maxwells. The picture they present is all nicely done up--pleasant looking families, nicely dressed, well behaved, harkening back to the good old days and what not. The language of their message sounds calm and caring. It may be a smokescreen but to some, it is tempting, at least on the surface. Michael Pearl's appeal, however, is a completely mystery. There's nothing appealing about him physically, he's brutal and coarse and every. single. word. just oozes contempt and condescension. No one is better than he and if you don't follow every morsel of his advice, he'd love nothing more than to laugh in your face should things go wrong for you. There's not one ounce of human decency in this pig of a man and I will never, EVER understand why he has followers.

[lizziesmom]

This part is just strange(well, I guess not more strange than the Pearls normally are)

The way that is worded, it sounds like Pearl waits for Gabriel to visit and they both visit porno sites together. This guy is a piece of work. Anyone know anything about his upbringing? It wouldn't shock me to discover that Michael Pearl is a serial killer -- someone like John Wayne Gacy who has two completely different lives.

[JesusFightClub]

I can sort of understand why people are drawn to other fundie ministries like the Maxwells. The picture they present is all nicely done up--pleasant looking families, nicely dressed, well behaved, harkening back to the good old days and what not. The language of their message sounds calm and caring. It may be a smokescreen but to some, it is tempting, at least on the surface. Michael Pearl's appeal, however, is a completely mystery. There's nothing appealing about him physically, he's brutal and coarse and every. single. word. just oozes contempt and condescension. No one is better than he and if you don't follow every morsel of his advice, he'd love nothing more than to laugh in your face should things go wrong for you. There's not one ounce of human decency in this pig of a man and I will never, EVER understand why he has followers.

A very good point. He actually seems proud of being a complete cunt.

[hoipolloi]

Anyone know anything about his upbringing? It wouldn't shock me to discover that Michael Pearl is a serial killer -- someone like John Wayne Gacy who has two completely different lives.

FWIW Wikipedia has the following information, a lot of which is included in the bio material at NGJ:

Michael Ford Pearl

Born 1945

Memphis, Tennessee

Citizenship United States

Education Messick High School 1965; Memphis Academy of Arts (now Memphis College of Art

Alma mater Mid-South Bible College (now Victory College)

[mlady]

Honestly I don't believe most of these "Pearl stories" anyway. Weird as they are I think they partially come from Michaels mind, things he sort of WISHES would had happened. He thinks it makes him sound oh so wise. Its so easy to add detail to minor events and spin them in such a way. The problem I have is with people who then take it literally and seriously.

[uber frau]

A very good point. He actually seems proud of being a complete cunt.

The ppl I know of who like the Pearls are ppl who have already fallen-hook, line, and sinker- for a message like the Maxwell's. It appeals to ppl who are convinced their Christianity is the one true way, who come from a cultural background where cruelty in the name of discipline is acceptable, and who are terrified their children will be sucked away into outer darkness. What I find interesting is that many of them don't seem to notice the worst bits. It's like they see the bits that confirm what they already believe (which is fairly terrible stuff, to be honest) but the worst of the worst doesn't seem to register. I've seen numerous debates online where a Pearl-ite denie that Michael Pearl advocates things like holding a toddler's hand to a hot stove to teach that hot things are dangerous, or his ideas on teaching gun safety.

Unless you trawl through the book and find citations with page numbers, most simply refuse to believe that he says half of the things that he does. And if you do convince them that you're not making this stuff up, 9 times out of 10 they'll come back with a cliche about pinches of salt or swallowing the meat and spitting out the bones.

[thoughtful]

The ppl I know of who like the Pearls are ppl who have already fallen-hook, line, and sinker- for a message like the Maxwell's. It appeals to ppl who are convinced their Christianity is the one true way, who come from a cultural background where cruelty in the name of discipline is acceptable, and who are terrified their children will be sucked away into outer darkness. What I find interesting is that many of them don't seem to notice the worst bits. It's like they see the bits that confirm what they already believe (which is fairly terrible stuff, to be honest) but the worst of the worst doesn't seem to register. I've seen numerous debates online where a Pearl-ite denie that Michael Pearl advocates things like holding a toddler's hand to a hot stove to teach that hot things are dangerous, or his ideas on teaching gun safety.

Unless you trawl through the book and find citations with page numbers, most simply refuse to believe that he says half of the things that he does. And if you do convince them that you're not making this stuff up, 9 times out of 10 they'll come back with a cliche about pinches of salt or swallowing the meat and spitting out the bones.

Yep. Anyone who hasn't yet read the Amazon reviews and the comments, might want to do so -- they're . . . enlightening. And there are lots of them -- whenever there is controversy, Pearl exhorts his followers to go flood the site with positive reviews.

http://www.amazon.com/To-Train-Child-Mi ... 1892112000

If you want to comment, review, or vote reviews up or down, go for it.

But I do advise people to read the book first, since the "I didn't even read this book and I know it is horrible" reviews and comments really do make detractors look they're on a witch hunt, and weaken the argument.

Besides, I honestly think that knowing about the whole thing, including the "lovey" stuff, makes it even clearer how awful it is. And, although it rarely gets discussed, there is plenty to offend besides the beating advice -- sexism, bigotry against gay people, paranoia of The World, weird theology, really crappy, repetitive writing -- oh, and virtually NO practical advice about raising children! :angry-banghead:

You can read it here, for free -- it's short:

quicksilverqueen.com/ttuacbook.html

Please don't send hate mail the person who put this online -- she's anti-Pearl.

[debrand]

Thank you, Thoughtful. Everyone should read that book because it is so obviously vile but there are parents who love it.

I've read online comments from Pearl supporters that anyone who posts something negative about the book is taking things out of context. :evil-eye:

[RosyDaisy]

Mike Pearl is the last person who should give lessons on gun safety...that evil, sadistic, mother-fucking son of a bitch!