The Return of Sparkling Adventures - Merge

[August]

These little girls are learning something that is quite damaging: that you have to change your personality, your morals, and the fundamentals of who you are depending upon which group you're with. They are going to have a hard time forming a sense of self with a role model like this, who changes like a chameleon to fit into different groups.

I saw this growing up as a civilian child among military children. Some of the resilient children did fine and were able to enter the established group (at school) with personalities intact. But so many of them would do anything, say anything, and be anything in order to fit in, and it was hard to respect someone who was that desperate to belong. There was a lot of depression, early pregnancy, and substance abuse. I worry that she's setting her girls up to be that way and it makes me sad, because it's largely preventable with a strong sense of who you are and where you come from. :(

I suspect it could affect them the opposite way. For all that Lauren's so legalistic about her hippiness, it's got to be scarily boundary-free for the children. I could see them running into the tightest rules they can find in order to feel secure. I have a child of a similar age to Aisha and I just can't even go there imagining how she'd try and manage the little ones and make everything work for everyone, while falling apart inside from anxiety.

[Alice_Fraggle]

The police have the original laptop with the unscrubbed entries though.

It's often hard to know exactly when and what she scrubs cause she doesn't mention it, you just reread an entry and know it used to be different but often can't quite remember what is different.

I'm quite technologically-impaired, so could someone please explain to me how her old laptop would have the unscrubbed posts. Does she write and save them all in Word and then upload them to the blog? I feel really dumb asking, but I'm really not understanding this. :oops:

(Back to getting caught up on this thread.)

[lipstickgoalie]

Red Gypsy Lauren

22 hours ago via Twitter

If the Madonna figure is the pure, mothering, female icon, who's her opposite?

You Lauren? Just a guess.

[caitiedid313]

I think she's probably just after another baby *shudder* After all, Brioni is approaching the "end of cute" now, Aisha is probably too "damaged", what with her normal response to grief, and that leaves her only two little girls to look at for now!

Maybe she won't actually look out someone with a partner; she'll get herself someone and say she's poly because she's still married to David. Then she'll post long, proselytizing posts about the authenticity of being poly. gag.

I completely think she wants another baby and will claim to be poly simply to make her choices more "authentic." I wonder, though, will she continue with the alphabetical naming? If so, i wonder if she will move to F or go back to E. After all, she didn't really take the time to process her grief nor did she allow healthy emotional responses from accessories A through D.

[Freed]

I completely think she wants another baby and will claim to be poly simply to make her choices more "authentic." I wonder, though, will she continue with the alphabetical naming? If so, i wonder if she will move to F or go back to E. After all, she didn't really take the time to process her grief nor did she allow healthy emotional responses from accessories A through D.

Egads, it's disturbingly easy for me to see her naming the next Elijah, in memoriam.

[August]

She won't have another. Not unless she switches rules sets. Elijah was the first baby she'd ever mothered. It's really hard to parent a baby, even harder to EC, nurse on demand 24/7, never let him touch the ground, etc. Remember, she can't use a pacifier, lay him on a blanket for a few minutes, pump and hand him off to someone else for a couple of hours or anything like that under this set of rules. She didn't enjoy it at all. Although, she was pretty obsessed with having a boy, maybe she'll try again for a boy.

[ladyaudley]

She won't have another. Not unless she switches rules sets. Elijah was the first baby she'd ever mothered. It's really hard to parent a baby, even harder to EC, nurse on demand 24/7, never let him touch the ground, etc. Remember, she can't use a pacifier, lay him on a blanket for a few minutes, pump and hand him off to someone else for a couple of hours or anything like that under this set of rules. She didn't enjoy it at all. Although, she was pretty obsessed with having a boy, maybe she'll try again for a boy.

what's to EC?

[OnceModestTwiceShy]

Red Gypsy Lauren

22 hours ago via Twitter

If the Madonna figure is the pure, mothering, female icon, who's her opposite?

You Lauren? Just a guess.

Lilith.

[Sister_Wife]

what's to EC?

Elimination Communication - Nappy Free Baby from the start

[ladyaudley]

Elimination Communication - Nappy Free Baby from the start

oh, right. Is that a thing?

I can't imagine having an infant in the bus would be pleasant for anyone.

[lilith]

oh, right. Is that a thing?

I can't imagine having an infant in the bus would be pleasant for anyone.

I was incredibly skeptical of it, but my sister has done it successfully with two babies. She did put them in nappies for long car trips though, as I assume Lauren would.

[lilith]

Lilith.

I'm assuming you mean the biblical Lilith, not me?

[salex]

You aren't kidding. :shock: Just looking at her blog makes me want a farm house, more kids, some chickens and some pigs. And I shall fucking knit some shit.

Not me. I was raised in the 12 room victorian farm house, bottle fed lambs before I was old enough for school, had a really great, bucolic rural childhood, with meadows that have never seen a plow, cherry trees, pecan groves, cute little mud boots, learned to knit (and to weld) etc etc etc. It was a really wonderful childhood, and my baby sister is doing today's variation with her husband and sons, in a great modern log cabin.

But my husband and I chose not to go back and we have no regrets. I never have to smell the singed feather smell when I buy boneless skinless chicken breasts at the butcher shop instead of cleaning my own chicken.

[August]

oh, right. Is that a thing?

I can't imagine having an infant in the bus would be pleasant for anyone.

Everything is a thing with someone. I know people who've done it, but only with their first, and mostly because their baby was otherwise easy and they were bored.

[lilith]

Everything is a thing with someone. I know people who've done it, but only with their first, and mostly because their baby was otherwise easy and they were bored.

Like I said, my sister did it with her younger two and was successful.

It requires 100% attachment parenting though - to learn and see the bub's cues you have to be right next to them and in tune with them 24/7. It wouldn't work for Lauren if she is as detached from her kids as she seems.

My sister taught her babies to respond to a whistling sound too - when they heard it they would wee.

It worked for her, but it requires a LOT of patience and effort on the part if the parent/s.

[August]

I didn't say no one did it with their second, just that the only people I know who did it did it with their first only. One of them even tried a loose kind of nest system at night. It lasted as long as you'd imagine that sort of thing lasting. (until her milk came in, in other words).

[lilith]

I didn't say no one did it with their second, just that the only people I know who did it did it with their first only. One of them even tried a loose kind of nest system at night. It lasted as long as you'd imagine that sort of thing lasting. (until her milk came in, in other words).

My sister's kids are fairly spaced out, which has probably contributed to her success with it - I'm not sure she would have attempted if they were closer in age. That said, both boys were using the toilet without cues from her well before they were 18 months old, which is pretty impressive.

As I said, I was very skeptical of the whole concept, but I was pleasantly surprised by her success with it. You do have to be attachment parenting intensely though, and even though I coslept, fed on demand, self weened and wore my bubs it's still not something I'd do myself. I was very fond of disposable nappies, and when I have another baby I will be using them again.

[Blahblah]

"We didn’t explore the resort fully, as I truly didn’t want to disturb the experiences of the other guests."

Um, I have no words. Lauren is being considerate of others and not wanting to inflict her children on them

[pastaswife]

"We didn’t explore the resort fully, as I truly didn’t want to disturb the experiences of the other guests."

Um, I have no words. Lauren is being considerate of others and not wanting to inflict her children on them

A

AKA: they were told they could only go to the pools and not where paying guests were.

Either that or she realised people without kids who don't know her story aren't quite as willing to put up with her kids and their "authentic" lack of boundaries.

[SiameseIfYouPlease]

So, the resort Lauren just visited is actually more of a day spa complex with a bunch of mineral spring pools of different shapes, sizes and temperatures. I was there a couple of weekends ago. It's very popular and pretty pricey (family entry $95, although its cheaper early in the morning). A huge portion of it is only accessible if you are over 16, including all the day spa area. There are signs everywhere saying "please talk quietly". And the staff do chase up kids wandering around and return them to parents. In all, not really a place for small children. I wonder why she went there? My kids are teenagers and it suited them, although they declared it a fairly daggy family outing.

[miffy]

So, the resort Lauren just visited is actually more of a day spa complex with a bunch of mineral spring pools of different shapes, sizes and temperatures. I was there a couple of weekends ago. It's very popular and pretty pricey (family entry $95, although its cheaper early in the morning). A huge portion of it is only accessible if you are over 16, including all the day spa area. There are signs everywhere saying "please talk quietly". And the staff do chase up kids wandering around and return them to parents. In all, not really a place for small children. I wonder why she went there? My kids are teenagers and it suited them, although they declared it a fairly daggy family outing.

She probably wanted to go there. I agree its not a place for small children. I think its on par with a winery as a suitable & fun place to take small children. They would have had a lot more fun at Flinders or Shoreham beach.

[Trudestar]

She sure seems to go to some very expensive places, that most families could rarely afford!

The majority of it doesn't seem to be of much educational benefit to the children either.

The more I read of her shit, the more she annoys me.

I notice she hasn't commented on any of the posts about the kids going barefoot at the farm.

[August]

LOL, I looked up the prices too! $35 if they were in by 9 on a weekday.

[OnceModestTwiceShy]

I'm assuming you mean the biblical Lilith, not me?

Lol yes. :)

[ladyaudley]

"You must love in such a way that the person you love feels free." So says Thich N Hanh, and wow… what implications if I take this to heart!

and we continue down the rabbithole... I'll get the popcorn.