Lauren makes Miss Raquel look like an award winning writer.

[formergothardite]

The Christmas post from One Bright Corner:

http://onebrightcorner.blogspot.com/

All of their stories are like this. It just rambles and is super hard to follow. I really have no idea what she was trying to do here.

It was high noon on a chilly December day. I was perched on my office desk (a black, well-used bean bag), a chick’o’stick in one hand and a cup of joe in the other (tea, Trader Joe tea, to be precise). All of a sudden, she swept into my office. Her face looked of trouble itself; her piercing eyes probed my forgotten reflections. “Are you surprised to see me?†she asked as I tried in vain to mop up the spilled tea using my hideously patterned tie.

:?

Say what?†he asked, one eyebrow raised.

“What did you do?â€

“Oh… well I got myself a spring-field bolt action WWI Sergeant York

rifle.â€

“What?â€

“I bought me a gun. I also did a fair amount of reading and writing and

fiddling.â€

“And I’ve enjoyed some of your works of art.â€

“Yeah. I like animals too,†he said salivating as he eyed my chick’o’stick sitting on its saucer. “And let’s see… well, back in May, I entered the double digits.â€

:|

Now we are at the end. Where did the time go? In answer to this question that has been the theme of my investigation, I can proudly say it was spent…carefully. In love, laughter, sometimes tears, but it was always shared together. Oh, and if Miss Ghost-of-Memories- Past happens to come rushing in on you as you’re enjoying a peaceful cup of tea, would you mind telling her my conclusion? (And hold on to that cup!) I only ever see her once a year. Wishing you all the best for Christmas, this is Susanna, Private I. Signing off.

From this I guess she was trying to talk about Christmas memories, but it was really, really, really hard to follow.

[AVENues]

:blankstare: She gets a what with who?! Either she is high or I am, which is impossible since I don't want to be hung. (I only saw miss Raqel twice, but she annoys me beyond my abilities to contain my rage.)

[formergothardite]

I read the post three times and it still makes no sense. It is like she had thoughts in her head and only parts of them made it into the posts. All of her writing is like this.

[Peas n carrots]

I tried reading it, but I have no idea what the plot of the story is, nor the point. It was just some really odd ramblings. I got bored a few paragraphs in and skimmed through.

SOTDRT Fail.

[AVENues]

Fact is, plain stupidity irritates me. Stupidity with self-absorbance and undeserved pride is just a toxic combo for me. It could kill me in large doses.

[Guest Anonymous]

Isn't 'joe' coffee?

[formergothardite]

I think she was trying to be funny saying "joe" but meaning Trader Joe tea, but the whole thing is just a mess. She is college age, she should be able to write a coherent short story.

[merrily]

I wrote better when I was in 6th grade o.0... I think she's suffering from the 'everyone-can-read-my-mind' syndrome of really inexperienced writers. Basically she writes only the things she thinks is important cause the dialogue/scenes imagined by her can also be imagined by other people.

[Peas n carrots]

I wrote better when I was in 6th grade o.0... I think she's suffering from the 'everyone-can-read-my-mind' syndrome of really inexperienced writers. Basically she writes only the things she thinks is important cause the dialogue/scenes imagined by her can also be imagined by other people.

Agreed. And the fact that either no one in her family read the story and critiqued before publishing or didn't have the ballz to tell her what they really thought.

[merrily]

Agreed. And the fact that either no one in her family read the story and critiqued before publishing or didn't have the ballz to tell her what they really thought.

Could possibly be she mistakes their critic as compliments. My dad told me "You improved" (polite way of saying it still sucks). Her family probably said something along those line. But who am I to judge fundies' critique abilities? :roll:

[JMarie]

Private I!!!!!

[formergothardite]

I am praying "private I" is just another one of the "jokes" that make no sense.