happy atheist Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 The big news broke somewhere in here: viewtopic.php?f=8&t=19243 Please try to limit this thread to discussion of Jessa's courtship and related matters. Season 7 of 19 Kids and Counting is discussed here: viewtopic.php?f=8&t=19302 And everything else about the Duggars is discussed here: viewtopic.php?f=8&t=19312 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rachel333 Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 Started to post this in the other thread, but it got locked in between: Ben would need years of education to become a Pastor.It does not seem like a good idea to get married when he is going to be in classes for the remaining of the possible marriage. Education? Hahaha. All you need in these groups is to call yourself a pastor and you're good. :D It's interesting to compare that to, say, my friend who in now in grad school studying to be a UU minister. Years of education so far and she's still got a few left. Of course, she doesn't have the one qualification the fundies do require: a penis. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iokaste Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 Picking up the "ethical non-hand-holding"-theme: don't you think they might have been "gently" coaxed to "choose" a hands-off courtship after Smuggar and Anna's embarrasing "hand-job" courtship? Now that Josh has moved, do you think Jessa will be set up in that house as well? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
anjulibai Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 From another comment on the other thread, I'm thinking the reason the J'slave book has been delayed has to do with Jessa's courtship. So anything they say in it about dating and marriage can come with a "See, one of us has experience!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tropaka Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 Picking up the "ethical non-hand-holding"-theme: don't you think they might have been "gently" coaxed to "choose" a hands-off courtship after Smuggar and Anna's embarrasing "hand-job" courtship? Now that Josh has moved, do you think Jessa will be set up in that house as well? I think Josh and Anna didn't hold hands until after they were engaged, and I bet the pressure was on to keep the same rules for this couple. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
formergothardite Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 Started to post this in the other thread, but it got locked in between: Education? Hahaha. All you need in these groups is to call yourself a pastor and you're good. :D It's interesting to compare that to, say, my friend who in now in grad school studying to be a UU minister. Years of education so far and she's still got a few left. Of course, she doesn't have the one qualification the fundies do require: a penis. Yeah, these sorts of people don't spend years becoming a pastor. Even those who go to Bible College to study usually spend the regular four years. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nokidsmom Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 Now that Josh has moved, do you think Jessa will be set up in that house as well? Interesting thought about Jessia moving into the house but I hope she moves closer to Ben's family. If only to get some distance from the TTH. I think it's possible that she could still be urged to continue the J'slave role to some degree if she lives too close. This way she and Ben have some breathing space. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
curlytoes79 Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 This is ridiculous. Where is the trust in this family? When does Jessa get to lean on those awesome Christian values that have been hammered into her since the moment she was born, without Dim Bulb or an accountability buddy looking over her shoulder? You can't call yourself virtuous if you've never been tempted; you're just over-protected. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nokidsmom Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 This is ridiculous. Where is the trust in this family? When does Jessa get to lean on those awesome Christian values that have been hammered into her since the moment she was born, without Dim Bulb or an accountability buddy looking over her shoulder? You can't call yourself virtuous if you've never been tempted; you're just over-protected. It's ironic isn't it. And it's not just trust in their daughter and that she will make the right decisions, JB and J'chelle don't trust in their own parenting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mela99 Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 Interesting thought about Jessia moving into the house but I hope she moves closer to Ben's family. If only to get some distance from the TTH. I think it's possible that she could still be urged to continue the J'slave role to some degree if she lives too close. This way she and Ben have some breathing space. I guess the man being the headship only counts when the man is a Duggar. Kelly Bates said it would be Chad's leadership to decide if they stayed or moved. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nokidsmom Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 I guess the man being the headship only counts when the man is a Duggar. Kelly Bates said it would be Chad's leadership to decide if they stayed or moved. Re: the bold, you may be right. As much as I hate this "headship business" with fundies, at least Kelly is being consistent about it and it shows that she also recognizes, albeit in the fundie way, that she and Gil will have to let go. I don't see JB doing that. He will still want to be the man in charge. Watch really close when we see to the transfer of authority (ugh!) at Jessa and Ben's wedding. Maybe TLC should zero on on JB when that's being done. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SnarkySarah27 Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 What's betting that there will be a second courtship announced soon. Jimbob can't be letting that Gil get one up on him! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sleepygirl1 Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 What's betting that there will be a second courtship announced soon. Jimbob can't be letting that Gil get one up on him! My guess is John David being the next one married off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flyawaystray Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 It has to be really weird to go from almost no physical contact, to having sex on the wedding night. I can imagine being totally petrified and anxious in that situation. I hope these parents at least talk with their sons and daughters so they know what they can expect. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
galaxy Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 My guess is John David being the next one married off. I agree, in many ways I'm actually surprised he wasn't courting before Jessa. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gustava Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 I agree, in many ways I'm actually surprised he wasn't courting before Jessa. As I've said elsewhere, I'm guessing JD is getting some on the side. And I really don't think he lives in the TTH. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rita Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 It has to be really weird to go from almost no physical contact, to having sex on the wedding night. I can imagine being totally petrified and anxious in that situation. I hope these parents at least talk with their sons and daughters so they know what they can expect. Now that the older girls have read anatomy & physiology books for midwifery, surely they have more knowledge than their peers, if not their parents. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JenniferJuniper Posted September 19, 2013 Share Posted September 19, 2013 I agree, in many ways I'm actually surprised he wasn't courting before Jessa. Methinks JD has sufficient control over his own life to avoid a televised dog and pony courtship/engagement/wedding. And I kind of doubt he's still a virgin, although I'm sure he has to be discreet. Jana's gonna find herself a beau through the Journey soon enough. Jinger will follow in a couple of years when Joy and Hannie can run Michelle's household for her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MarsGirl Posted September 19, 2013 Share Posted September 19, 2013 Wow. I havent been on FJ in like a month and this is what I missed!? Holy cow!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mela99 Posted September 19, 2013 Share Posted September 19, 2013 It has to be really weird to go from almost no physical contact, to having sex on the wedding night. I can imagine being totally petrified and anxious in that situation. I hope these parents at least talk with their sons and daughters so they know what they can expect. It's already awkward and uncomfortable, and I'm sorry, but virgin boys know NOTHING about a woman's needs, so I imagine it's even worse. Unless they just give them a copy of that Ed Wheat book, which SUPPOSEDLY says a man is in charge of pleasing his wife. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tangy Bee Posted September 19, 2013 Share Posted September 19, 2013 Well it's national news now. I don't think JB would allow the media to know unless he is VERY certain things will work out. A broken courtship could totally ruin the Duggar's credibility with their fans :roll: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CruitLvr Posted September 19, 2013 Share Posted September 19, 2013 Methinks JD has sufficient control over his own life to avoid a televised dog and pony courtship/engagement/wedding. And I kind of doubt he's still a virgin, although I'm sure he has to be discreet. I'm sure I'm way off, but JD has always struck me as being so "different" than anyone else in the family. Sure, he's still fundie to the core, but it's obvious he doesn't care about the dog and pony show at all. Back to Jessa - I didn't read part one of this, but I am happy for her. At least she will get out of the house. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Justme Posted September 19, 2013 Share Posted September 19, 2013 Why does everyone think JD will marry soon? I just don't get the "I can't wait to marry" vibe from him? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
0KidsAndHappy Posted September 19, 2013 Share Posted September 19, 2013 Do I remember correctly ... Has Jessa held hands with other girls while doing mission work? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
socalrules Posted September 19, 2013 Share Posted September 19, 2013 Now that the older girls have read anatomy & physiology books for midwifery, surely they have more knowledge than their peers, if not their parents. I am not sure talking to my mom before my fundie wedding night would ease my fears. I think it would freak me out more. Ick, Ick, Ick. What's more freaky is that for people living normal lives, we don't really think much about the wedding night of people we know. It's like, who cares. You figure they already have had sex, so no big deal. Can you imagine being a fundie? You know that so many people you know are currently thinking that you are getting the proverbial cherry popped at that moment. Ick, Ick, Ick. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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