John Oliver Slays Abstinence Only Sex Ed

[Howl]

John Oliver (Last Week Tonight on HBO) did an episode on American sex ed (or lack of it). It is (as the British say) BRILLIANT! He goes over the general topic, the state of sex ed in the US, and then gets after the craziness of Abstinence Only as a substitute for sex ed, with footage of abstinence speakers Shelly Donahue and Pam Stenzel (what a repellent human being) in the process of damaging teen minds forever. I googled and found that Pam Stenzel gets an average of $5000 to speak at these high school assemblies.

There is also some poignant footage of Elizabeth Smart speaking out about the damaged caused by the purity culture message.

Anyway, I consider John Oliver to be one of the funniest men in the world, and the most astute commentator on American politics and culture evah!

Spoiler: Johnathan Banks as a teen in an archaic sex ed video

This all wraps up with John Oliver's own version of a sex ed vid with Laverne Cox, Kristen Schaal, Kumail Nanjiani, Nick Offerman, Megan Mullaly, Jack McBrayer, Aisha Tyler and Jonathan Banks.

Watch John Oliver be amazed that only 22 states require some form of sex ed, and of those 22, only 13 require the information to be medically accurate!

(20 minutes or so)

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[freejingerbeth]

THAT was outstanding! I love John Oliver! I had no idea that the abstinence only programs contained such damaging and sexist views, about women. I'm surprised a legal group hasn't tried to eliminate them, for that reason alone.

[Terrie]

This video just spurred a discussion on Facebook among some of my friends from high school about how much our conservative Christian high school taught us some seriously screwed up stuff about sex. I was lucky. After a religion teacher told me (in front of the entire class) that my liberal UCC church wasn't REALLY Christian, I was of the opinion that they were full of shit. But for kids who got the same messages from their churches, it really screwed up their thinking.

[VVV]

I grew up with Baptist parents who signed every permission slip I brought home regarding sex ed. I think it's inexcusable that the sex ed I received from my public high school in Maryland in the 1970s was so much better than what passes for sex ed at my kids' public high school in Texas now. I remember learning about contraceptives--pros, cons, and how to use them, and about the many varieties of sex acts, all in a nonjudgmental context. And yet I made the personal decision to wait until marriage, at which point I put to use the information I had learned in high school.

Judging by the questions my middle school daughter has asked me along with information from her about what is really going on among the kids, the Texas approach is tragically off-base and frankly, worse than useless.

[sophie10130]

I want to make a point about the states that don't require sex ed to be medically accurate. The schools teaching crazy inaccurate things in these states aren't just private or Christian schools. These are public schools! One girl I knew was taught in sex ed in her public school that condoms had a 75% failure rate, that abortions have a 50% chance of making you infertile and it goes up with every abortion, and that the pill has some crazy high chance of making you infertile. They aren't just teaching abstinence only like my school, they are teaching lies. She also never got a sexual anatomy lesson.

[DarkAnts]

Sex Ed in Davis county Utah was a joke. We made posters about things to do on your date besides "petting". You pet your dog not your date. There was no explanation as to what sex was or protection.

This was in 1998 but I am not surprised to see that it's still the standard.

My sex Ed happened in college. The school I went to had monthly seminars about it. They were informal and the women teaching it were able to help me.

[Rachel333]

Just last year in college (a Christian college) I had to watch a video of Pam Stenzel yelling at a bunch of Catholic high schoolers about how sex ruins lives. She literally told girls that birth control might kill them! It was horrible, and completely lacking in grace which is what Christianity is supposed to be all about.

I had abstinence-only sex ed in high school and I don't remember anything particularly bad about the program (it was a woman who went from school to school, not our normal teacher), just nothing good either. All I remember is a bunch of pictures of diseased genitals.

There was virtually no discussion of consent. At one point the teacher (our regular teacher, a basketball/track coach who clearly didn't care about the class and mostly just showed us movies) read us a section of the textbook about rape and when it mentioned males being raped most of the class started laughing. The teacher, rather than correcting the misconception that men cannot be raped, joined in laughing and then moved on.

I love that Elizabeth Smart is speaking about this. I really admire her and I think she is the perfect person to reach conservatives who would never listen to someone like John Oliver and explain just how dangerous this mindset really is.

[browncoatslytherin]

the fiance and i adore john oliver, and we watch him as often as we can. he's one of those people i would love to sit down and have a conversation with.

this episode was no different. we both enjoyed it in that it was informative and somewhat dismaying. i've also had the unfortunate "benefit" of abstinence only sex ed. i love elizabeth smart for standing up against it, but i wish more people would! people that have been damaged or hurt by this ideal, so that maybe, MAYBE, society can see more blatantly how this negatively affects young people.

[Rubaiyat]

It was a brilliant take-down, and it made me sick to my stomach. Funny how John Oliver seems to have that effect! To be clear - the nausea usually shows up right about the time he's flashing concrete numbers showing just how bass-awkward things have gotten.

One of my favorite high schools in which I worked, has an abstinence only program. Our counseling contract included almost 120 kids. Of those 120, we had to give the sex talk (as in "condoms DON'T make you less of a man, please don't use two at a time, what you're experiencing right now? that's an STI, this is where babies come from, no, you don't 'pee in her' to get her pregnant....") to approximately ALL of them, because they had no idea. Most of my girls didn't even know what their period was, much less how it correlated with pregnancy, or even HOW you get pregnant. I have sat with more girls than I can count of both hands (three times) and cried with them as they realized that the reason they weren't bleeding meant they were having a baby. Several of those girls didn't even realize they'd had sex..because they truly had no idea what sex is!! Our poor babies were still afraid of swimming pools and toilet seats!!!

As far as I'm concerned, not only is the "chewed piece of gum" mentality crazy damaging, it's child abuse to force kids/teens into this type of ignorance about their own bodies. It's even worse when the adults they trust are not only keeping them ignorant, they are feeding them blatant lies.

Ugh. This shiz pisses me off. How many kids' (and later, adults') lives is this type of "education" ruining, or permanently affecting? This is not okay!!!

*shakes tiny impotent fist in rage*

[DGayle]

Elizabeth Smart is a heartbreaking example of how abstinence-only is so dangerous. Imagine having abstinence so drilled into your head that you forgo the chance of rescue because you believe yourself to be worthless as a human because of being raped.

[2xx1xy1JD]

Totally brilliant.

I'd really, REALLY love for everyone to challenge every abstinence-only supporter and everyone who claims to be "pro-life" on this.

If you claim to love life, you should want to prevent serious, potentially fatal diseases. Right? Because using serious or potentially fatal diseases as a tool for scaring people is what a cruel douchebag would do, and not someone who, you know, supports life.

If you want to reduce the number of abortions, why not reduce the number of unplanned pregnancies? Except for serious medical concerns, it's not planned pregnancies that are being aborted.

Kids in the United States know that sex exists - because they are teens and have hormones, because teens talk to each other, because the internet exists, because TV and movies exist, because porn exists, because music and videos exist, because 50 Shades of Grey exists. All of these sources will make sex seem exciting, will show people getting it on without getting pregnant, and will be completely useless when it comes to providing actual information about how to have sex without getting pregnant or getting a disease. We know that it's possible for the teen pregnancy rate to be far lower. In the United States, it's 57 per 1,000 teen girls ages 15-19. In Switzerland, it's 8 per 1,000. 26% of teen pregnancies end in abortion. So, if you eliminate 49 pregnancies per 1,000 girls, you would also eliminate 12 abortions per 1,000 girls. If you teach teens to use the "double Dutch" method of always using both the Pill and condoms, you dramatically reduce the risk of pregnancy. When you make free long-acting reversible contraceptives, like an IUD, available to teens through clinics, you reduce the teen pregnancy rate by 40% (http://jezebel.com/what-happens-when-yo ... 1691995183).

I guess you could continue the tape or shoes or chewing gum analogies - if your goal is to sabotage the future marriage of anyone who wasn't a virgin, to turn men into sexist assholes, to inflict more pain on sexual abuse/assault victims or to create the same sort of intact-hymen obsession currently seen in countries like Iran.

[Handmaiden of Dog]

From day one John Oliver's show has been must see TV for me. Every week he delivers a 20 minute lesson on some topic that half the time I didn't know I cared about, until he delivers. Funny and smart and highlighting things that need to be changed like tax money being used for sports stadiums, food waste, outrageously long drug sentences, and payday loans. However this week he talked about something I care passionately about. It is a tragedy how we misinform, uneducate, and flat out lie to the children of this country in the belief that somehow it will keep them from having sex. It doesn't work. It does ruin lives. All while congress and FOX demonize Planned Parenthood which can help these children when they get in trouble.

I don't get it, I truly don't. Why are we so hell bent on pretending that if we lie to kids about birth control that they will not have sex? No, what happens is that they have sex but don't bother with birth control. We need to be handing out condoms to anyone who asks. Giving a guy a condom is not the same as guaranteeing he will have sex it just means if he does have sex he won't pick up an STD and he won't get a girl pregnant. My husband's pet theory is that people in power just don't want anyone except themselves to have sex; sex is fun and it doesn't cost money (aside from the BC and lube) and we can't have the peasants enjoying themselves.

[2xx1xy1JD]

From day one John Oliver's show has been must see TV for me. Every week he delivers a 20 minute lesson on some topic that half the time I didn't know I cared about, until he delivers. Funny and smart and highlighting things that need to be changed like tax money being used for sports stadiums, food waste, outrageously long drug sentences, and payday loans. However this week he talked about something I care passionately about. It is a tragedy how we misinform, uneducate, and flat out lie to the children of this country in the belief that somehow it will keep them from having sex. It doesn't work. It does ruin lives. All while congress and FOX demonize Planned Parenthood which can help these children when they get in trouble.

I don't get it, I truly don't. Why are we so hell bent on pretending that if we lie to kids about birth control that they will not have sex? No, what happens is that they have sex but don't bother with birth control. We need to be handing out condoms to anyone who asks. Giving a guy a condom is not the same as guaranteeing he will have sex it just means if he does have sex he won't pick up an STD and he won't get a girl pregnant. My husband's pet theory is that people in power just don't want anyone except themselves to have sex; sex is fun and it doesn't cost money (aside from the BC and lube) and we can't have the peasants enjoying themselves.

Yep.

Look, there were many things that made me want to have sex as a teen. Raging hormones. Cute guys. The books I read. The pornos we saw on the sly. The music I liked. The shows I watched. It all made it sound pretty exciting.

You know what didn't make me horny, at all? Sex ed and teen birth control clinics. It was all about the details of all the nasty diseases out there (we're talking about the late 1980s, when AIDS meant a gruesome death and everyone was terrified), learning how diseases were and weren't spread and how to reduce the risk of transmission, proper use of condoms, and learning the details of how each method of birth control worked along with failure rates and risks. If anything, it made me step back and really think about whether I wanted to take the risk, and then it made me delay doing the actual deed until I had a chance to go to the teen clinic, get on the Pill, wait for it to take effect and figure out all the back-up birth control that I'd be using.

[RandomTrivia]

I don't get it, I truly don't. Why are we so hell bent on pretending that if we lie to kids about birth control that they will not have sex? No, what happens is that they have sex but don't bother with birth control. We need to be handing out condoms to anyone who asks. Giving a guy a condom is not the same as guaranteeing he will have sex it just means if he does have sex he won't pick up an STD and he won't get a girl pregnant. My husband's pet theory is that people in power just don't want anyone except themselves to have sex; sex is fun and it doesn't cost money (aside from the BC and lube) and we can't have the peasants enjoying themselves.

We don't just stick kids behind the wheel of a car and hope they figure it out on their own before their first accident/roundabout/four-way stop. It seems to me that crappy or non-existent sex ed is sort of the same thing. Condoms, seat belts, etc. Now, my analogy falls apart at the point where you actually drive a car in drivers' ed classes, and because drivers' ed has become rare in schools, but it's the best I've come up with. But drivers' ed makes you (hopefully) a safer driver, sex ed has the same effect on sexual relationships.

[latraviata]

We (the Dutch) watched John Oliver on television and are stunned by so much ingnorance and nonsense.

A very interesting article (in English) about sex ed in the Netherlands and the effect it has on figures of abortions, teen pregnancies and the like.

http://www.pbs.org/newshour/updates/spring-fever/

[2xx1xy1JD]

We don't just stick kids behind the wheel of a car and hope they figure it out on their own before their first accident/roundabout/four-way stop. It seems to me that crappy or non-existent sex ed is sort of the same thing. Condoms, seat belts, etc. Now, my analogy falls apart at the point where you actually drive a car in drivers' ed classes, and because drivers' ed has become rare in schools, but it's the best I've come up with. But drivers' ed makes you (hopefully) a safer driver, sex ed has the same effect on sexual relationships.

The best explanation that I can figure out is that it's somehow better to say "told ya so" than it is to actually prevent bad consequences.

[TuringMachine]

I guess I lucked out with sex ed. My school definitely encouraged abstinence but still had a thorough sex education.

Aslo for anyone not aware, Megan Mullally, the one who says "this is a lot less curvy than I'm used to, is referring to Nick Offerman, her husband. Favorite joke of the video.

[NeverQuivered]

Did you see tonight's episode? He absolutely slays televangelism and many of his points could apply to fundies and their gritting for Jesus.

[morri]

here it is part of the biology curriculum.

/first basics are in year4, and puberty, cycles, contraception is in y 7 and 8 (13 to 14 yo)

[Guest]

Did you see tonight's episode? He absolutely slays televangelism and many of his points could apply to fundies and their gritting for Jesus.

It was great! Our Lady of Perpetual Exemption - brilliant! He's just taking down one thing after another. I look forward to his videos on YouTube every Monday morning.

[NeverQuivered]

Here's a link to an article in Raw Story that links the video of last night's Televangelism video. Not breaking because Raw Story.

http://www.rawstory.com/2015/08/john-ol ... beautiful/

[browncoatslytherin]

he did one of televangelists? why oh why must my internets be on the fritz??

[Rachel333]

Just watched it, and it was awesome. It really needs its own thread.

I'm glad he is shining a light on this because my family is involved with a lot of these ministries and it's so frustrating and sad to me. I was taught since I was little to "sow a seed" (not necessarily money, but it usually was) in order to get what I wanted, and of course it never happened, but at least I never gave more than a few dollars unlike so many other people I know who gave more money than they could afford, thinking that by doing that they would get more money in return.

I love too that he's setting up his own church. Rachel Dratch was perfect as the televangelist's wife, and I think I'm going to have to watch that again. I also enjoyed the painting hanging on the wall of John Oliver and Rachel Dratch with a dog.

[quiversR4hunting]

he did one of televangelists? why oh why must my internets be on the fritz??

Not one- several! C. Dollar, Copelands, etc.

It was a great video. He even started his own "church" that qualifies as a church per the IRS! Our Lady of Perpetual Exemption - You can hear what the 1-800 number says at: youtube.com/watch?v=_pBhhZtV_iM

[ADoyle90815]

Elizabeth Smart is a heartbreaking example of how abstinence-only is so dangerous. Imagine having abstinence so drilled into your head that you forgo the chance of rescue because you believe yourself to be worthless as a human because of being raped.

So true, it was a good thing she appeared on that show, as the chewed piece of gum thing is part of why she didn't try to get rescued sooner, since she thought she wasn't worth anything anymore. Unfortunately, the culture she grew up still teaches that to some extent since they put such a high value on virginity and abstinence until marriage. I wonder how many rape victims in Utah culture have committed suicide because they were considered to be a chewed piece of gum or a licked cupcake and not worthy of anything. In my opinion, Elizabeth Smart was lucky in that she's still here to be talking about how damaging abstinence-only sex education can be.