Bates women vs Duggar women

[whoviana]

The Bates family did better when it comes to picking partners. I think it is because their parents respected and trusted them more when they were courting, and let them make their own rules. Sure, I cant imagine them being happy if the next kid to court says "Im going to have sex before marriage" or "We wont have P in V sex, but we are going to do everything else", but Zach and Whitney kissing wasn't the end of the world, and they all have been allowed to choose, like when they decide to hug.

Also I just really dislike Ben. And I am not too impressed at Derick over the cat incident.

OT and I apologize for it: I'm probably the one millionth to ask: what was this cat incident all about? I haven't come across it yet. Thx. I swear if he hurt a cat, I'm going to FedEx him a box of cow dung.

[ILoveJellybeans]

They were sledding and Derick ran over a cat. The cat was there when he went down, he could have gone down on any other part of the hill but went straight for the cat.

[whoviana]

They were sledding and Derick ran over a cat. The cat was there when he went down, he could have gone down on any other part of the hill but went straight for the cat.

I can't freak out right now since I have a good doze of absynthe and 99 percent dark chocolate in my system, but oh my goodness. If he hit the cat on purpose, then he's a freakin' sadist. That's how Jeffrey Dahmer kicked off his career. Hea's a freaking Jeffrey Dahmer Jr if he hit that cat on purpose. If that is true, I'm going to call him Dahmer.

[SayWhat]

The Bates girls have made out better in the husband arena.

Primarily because Bin is a total douche-canoe.

[zz22zz]

To clarify the cat ran away from where Derick was going to run him over, unfortunately the cat did not jump on his head and dig in it's claws into his face and enjoy the rest of the ride.

Lame part was Derick could have chosen a lot of other paths, as mentioned before. He also got on the sled about 15 feet from the cat on a really small hill.

Poor judgement

I think all of the couples are well suited for one another... a la high school

Chad and Erin, the kids from the student council

John and Alyssa, the cheerleader and football player

Michaella and Brandon, future cult leaders

Jill and Derick, band geeks

Jessa and Ben, the kids who's relationship is all about sex. Jessa reminds me of my friend who was on the pill by 13 and looked 20.

[Nic]

Chad Paine - he must be a gift from God to erin - seriously that man must be amazing

He agreed to having their bedroom done up like a little girl pink bedroom! hahah I always thought wow, that is a kind, kind gentle guy.

[calimojo]

To clarify the cat ran away from where Derick was going to run him over, unfortunately the cat did not jump on his head and dig in it's claws into his face and enjoy the rest of the ride.

Lame part was Derick could have chosen a lot of other paths, as mentioned before. He also got on the sled about 15 feet from the cat on a really small hill.

Poor judgement

I think all of the couples are well suited for one another... a la high school

Chad and Erin, the kids from the student council

John and Alyssa, the cheerleader and football player

Michaella and Brandon, future cult leaders

Jill and Derick, band geeks

Jessa and Ben, the kids who's relationship is all about sex. Jessa reminds me of my friend who was on the pill by 13 and looked 20.

Good descriptions, but I kind of think of Ben and Jessa as the Football player and the leader of the Mean Girls clique.

John and Alyssa might be more like the President of the Young Republicans and the Homecoming Queen.

If any of these couples have a chance for a long term public Life, I could see it being Alyssa and John. I could see him following his father in politics and Alyssa would be a beautiful, poised politician's wife. With this kind of life, they might avoid having a ton of kids, since Politics will be a demanding life for them.

[calimojo]

I took that to mean that they both seem very well marinated in Gothardism. And with Brandon likely working for them, that they will possibly become rising stars in the Gothard/ATI/IBLP world, or branch off and start their own brand of crazy

[JuicyDuggar]

I think Brandon just has a very "cold fish" personality. He comes across as awkward on camera, perhaps not real personable to strangers. But those saying he's creepy is hilarious. Michael's adoration comes off as creepy to me, though ITA with the post that said she's just so happy/relieved to have found a spouse. Brandon looked mega uncomfortable when she mentioned on the Thanksgiving episode that she was attracted to how he is with kids. He might have even looked pissed; the thought of how nice he would be to her behind closed doors after they married crossed my mind.

[calimojo]

I thought he looked uncomfortable at that time as well. Not angry just awkward and surprised. But I took it as he thought she was going to say she was "Attracted to him" and that it seemed kind of sexual and that would be taboo for her to say.

But then she amended it to say attracted to how he is with kids. Also, Michael has baby fever, and maybe Brandon, while on with Gothardism, might not be wanting to rush into parenthood as quickly as Michael wants to. He might have enough smarts to be just a little nervous about that idea. He seems to be very fiscally aware and knows that he is not in a position to support 2-3 kids in the next 3 years or so.

I think he loves Michael, he is just not as effusive as she is. Frankly, her candor surprises me, because during their other show, she rarely talked and has rarely talked during their appearances on 19K as well.

Skyler seems to turn up on a lot of episodes. Is he angling for publicity? Is he wanting to become a fundie celeb? He has been on the Bates show, on 19k hanging out with Josh, despite that he is several years younger than Josh, and I think he has been in the background at Josiah's grad celebration and in other shows too.

Which of the Bates girls are now old enough for courting? For the Duggars it is Jana/Jinger and I guess in a stretch, possibly Joy, who is now 17, right? I mean it would seem odd to us, but Ben started courting Jessa when he was 17 or just barely 18, so it isn't that far out.

How old is Skyler? Is well suited to Jana/Jinger, or Tori Bates? If I were him, he should look to the Bates girls. They seem more fun, and have a bit more freedom during courting.

[FloraKitty35]

I can't freak out right now since I have a good doze of absynthe and 99 percent dark chocolate in my system, but oh my goodness. If he hit the cat on purpose, then he's a freakin' sadist. That's how Jeffrey Dahmer kicked off his career. Hea's a freaking Jeffrey Dahmer Jr if he hit that cat on purpose. If that is true, I'm going to call him Dahmer.

They could name their son that: Dahmer Duggar Dillard.

[calimojo]

Dahmer brutally tortured animals and humans. I don't think he made a stupid mistake one time and then turned into a serial killer.

To overreact to this situation ends up diluting the really terrible things that extreme fundamentalism do.

yes, this was bad. Animals are innocent and should never be hurt on purpose or even put in danger and certainly not as a form of amusement. But I don't believe that Derick is systematically torturing animals or gets pleasure from seeing animals hurt. I think this event is more one of absolute thoughtlessness. And I think it is possible that He thought the cat would move sooner than it did.

The Cackling laughter in the background is more disturbing to me. For all we know, Derick may have jumped off the sled and gone immediately to check on the Cat. The Clip cuts off after the possible point of impact, so we don't know.

I am also bothered that He hasn't had the decency to at least acknowledge that he used poor judgment and that posting it was a second layer of poor judgment. Even just a simple "Thank you to those who called me out for this dumb decision. I was raised to care for all God's Creatures, and I have let myself and God down, by this momentary lapse. As I face impending fatherhood, I know that I want to teach my children to care and love all of God's creatures."

[SassyPants]

Dahmer brutally tortured animals and humans. I don't think he made a stupid mistake one time and then turned into a serial killer.

To overreact to this situation ends up diluting the really terrible things that extreme fundamentalism do.

yes, this was bad. Animals are innocent and should never be hurt on purpose or even put in danger and certainly not as a form of amusement. But I don't believe that Derick is systematically torturing animals or gets pleasure from seeing animals hurt. I think this event is more one of absolute thoughtlessness. And I think it is possible that He thought the cat would move sooner than it did.

The Cackling laughter in the background is more disturbing to me. For all we know, Derick may have jumped off the sled and gone immediately to check on the Cat. The Clip cuts off after the possible point of impact, so we don't know.

I am also bothered that He hasn't had the decency to at least acknowledge that he used poor judgment and that posting it was a second layer of poor judgment. Even just a simple "Thank you to those who called me out for this dumb decision. I was raised to care for all God's Creatures, and I have let myself and God down, by this momentary lapse. As I face impending fatherhood, I know that I want to teach my children to care and love all of God's creatures."

Sadly, I think the Duggars (et al) believe that they are beyond admitting and apologizing for their transgressions. In their minds, they are better than everyone else. They collectively display an entitled attitude and arrogance.

They seemingly do not understand what working in the media actually means; that with freedoms come responsibilities and that decisions and behaviors have consequences. They really do live in Fantasyland.

[CorruptionInc.]

It's safe to say that Derick can't be all that logical (in terms of smarts) - he married a Duggar for peats sake!

[roddma]

I don't think the bates kids have any more freedom than the Duggars. They are both are ATI which requires them o follow strict courting rules. If it were Zach and Whitney's choice to kiss, they should not have apologized.

Re:Cat incident

It was Ben who gave him the push. IMO While it may seem like overreaction, The Duggars shouldnt get off easy. Many younger kids unfortunately look up to them.

[TeaELSee]

I just realized that Bates Motel 3rd season starts today!

Too bad they didn't name one of their sons Norman. :evil-eye:

[SassyPants]

I just realized that Bates Motel 3rd season starts today!

Too bad they didn't name one of their sons Norman. :evil-eye:

There's still time for a psycho Norman Bates to make an appearance. :shifty-kitty:

[19 cats and counting]

I think the Bates girls have better picks (and to their personalities). Unlike the 4 oldest Duggar girls (who are always lumped together) the 4 oldest Bates girls have very distinct interests and personalities (counting Tori here too).

Now onto their suitors--

Chad--- a real catch for the fundie world. Yes he comes from fundie royalty, but he treats Erin like a princess and is the right man for him. He would not want to see her hurt and will allow a doctor to help determine their family size.

John-- I don't know much about him because he seems much more private than Alyssa or his father (and I've worked with candidate's kids before and many are only involved to help their parent and do not want to follow in their footsteps). I'm glad he took her out of state and is allowing her to do things like pierce her ears and wear pants. He definitely seems much more quiet than Alyssa, but I think they truly love each other and are happy together.

Brandon-- Trying to get a better read on him. I can see some of David Waller in him, but he does not ping my gaydar like David does. From the pics I've seen of Michael and Brandon together, they look adorable and she's clearly in love with him. Of all the Bates girls, she's the perfect one for him because she's just as much of a Kool Aid drinker and would be happy as a homeschooling SAHM. (A note about David Waller--- I recently watched the Josh/Anna wedding episode and Priscilla seemed much more upbeat and perky then as opposed to now. I really hope he's not so controlling that she's afraid of him).

Derick--- I liked him more at first (before the cat incident) but the more I see him the more of a Kool Aid drinker he seems to become. For his career outside of the home and college education, sadly I don't know how much he will pass onto the next generation. He seems VERY eager to please Jim Bob.

Ben--- not mature enough to be married. He can't provide for Jessa (after the TLC money runs out) by being Jim Bob's bitch.

As for Jana/Jinger--- Cinder Jana needs a Chad Paine type to be her Prince Charming and take her away from the family compound. Jinger needs a John Webster type who has an established life/career out of state and will take her there and allow her to thrive in their new life together. Sadly, I don't see Jim Bob approving either. He is looking out more for himself (Ie men that will be his bitch) than his daughters.

[calimojo]

are there any more Webster Boys?

[SassyPants]

I cannot see JB approving any man that would relocate one of daughters outside of NW Arkansas.

[zz22zz]

There's still time for a psycho Norman Bates to make an appearance. :shifty-kitty:

exactly Zach and the rest of the Bates boys, that could be a lot of children in the next 10 years.....hopefully Norman will be one of their wives favorite Grandpa's name.

[zz22zz]

Brandon-- Trying to get a better read on him. I can see some of David Waller in him, but he does not ping my gaydar like David does. From the pics I've seen of Michael and Brandon together, they look adorable and she's clearly in love with him. Of all the Bates girls, she's the perfect one for him because she's just as much of a Kool Aid drinker and would be happy as a homeschooling SAHM. (A note about David Waller--- I recently watched the Josh/Anna wedding episode and Priscilla seemed much more upbeat and perky then as opposed to now. I really hope he's not so controlling that she's afraid of him).

ummmm is there anyone who's gaydar does not ping when Pecan thief is involved...just curious...

btw my daughter loves your screen name, she says "that must be an AWESOME person" (she is 11 so it's a huge compliment!)

[eri]

ummmm is there anyone who's gaydar does not ping when Pecan thief is involved...just curious...

btw my daughter loves your screen name, she says "that must be an AWESOME person" (she is 11 so it's a huge compliment!)

I wonder why we think sexuality is that obvious? I know exactly what you mean: He seems gay. But I have my doubts that he is actually gay. There seems to be a latent stereotype we all have that effeminate behavior indicates that a man is gay. It is an odd stereotype when you think about all the false positives and non-effeminate gay dudes.

[DGayle]

There's a single husband among the married girls who is an all-around good guy, and that's Chad. Dill is okay, but he's clearly gung ho on knocking Jill up as much as he can, and living on TLC money. Chad puts Erin first in all ways, and that's refreshing to see.

[actuallyjessica]

regarding brandon, i don't think he's gay. i think he's just quite rigid in personality like david waller. they are both from the same area, yes? it may just be the way the fundies are from where they are. both the duggar and bates families are from the south and maybe that's the contrast we see?

brandon is mysterious because he's holding his cards close. he gives me a weird feeling like he could be potentially controlling and/or abusive, but again, that could be because he's reserved and not comfortable in front of the cameras.