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Driscoll's megachurch Mars Hill to dissolve


neuroticcat

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Mark was right. Mars Hill IS mark driscoll.

Yep, it really was nothing more than a cult of personality...

Wishing luck to the good people who were caught in this hellhole, both as staff members and as congregants.

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And on the anniversary of Tool-o-ween too, right?

What a blessed holiday!

:fsm:

I was thinking the same thing. Centuries from now, will the Church of FJ[tm][/tm] be debating the true origin of Tool O'ween? :D

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I'm still surprised that the three Seattle churches are being collapsed into Ballard , which is Convenient to nowhere.

I wonder how many of these churches can survive financially without the rest of the network .

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:pink-shock: Wow! Did not expect this.

Somewhere around 2008-09 my family belonged to a church where the pastor worshiped at the altar of MD/MH. He and the other elder would drive up there fairly regularly to sit at the feet of the master...who may or may not have been aware of their existence.

At the same time, this pastor started heavily emphasizing sex, hot wives, "biblical" masculinity and femininity. Many times I was so uncomfortable I had to walk out. They also came out with a huge push to make all members sign membership covenants, and spent a good chunk of change to buy access into MH's proprietary social media network (whose name escapes me), where we would all be strongly urged to conduct all church-related business and e-socializing (communication, home group signups and communication, class information and signups, chat, etc). There was also regular mention of punching people in the neck from the pulpit.

I eventually had enough and insisted we leave. About a year later the place imploded, the draconian membership covenants were apparently wielded against some really good people, and a great deal of damage was done. Many refugees joined the local startup of MH, and started posting all kinds of weird, hostile things on Facebook about how people who said mean things about their pastor (now MD, but only by proxy since we're not actually in the Seattle area) should get punched out. I didn't know what the heck was going on, but wasn't in touch with those people anymore, so whatever,

But most of them are still pat of the local MH. Afaik, they all planned to hold on for dear life.

Glad to see it die. Too many good people have been hurt (not to mention the ugly mysogynistic teaching).

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My old church actually used the mars hill social network called The City. It was super convenient and the only reason they stopped using it was because it was ridiculously expensive.

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I was thinking the same thing. Centuries from now, will the Church of FJ[tm][/tm] be debating the true origin of Tool O'ween? :D

May the Twinkle of wonder be all around you this blessed day!!

I found/dragged that vid from it's vimeo obscurity!! *blatant brag/glory hunting*

Wonder what will happen next Tool O'Ween. So, Vi$ion Forum GONE, mars hill/driscoll GONE,

I am hoping Tool O'Ween 2015 will be the fall of the Duggars. Maybe one, or someone close, will "come out" with some stuff. Who knows?

Wish there was a cross hairs smiley.

MAY THE TWINKLE OF WONDER BE ALL ABOUT YOU.

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I was thinking the same thing. Centuries from now, will the Church of FJ[tm][/tm] be debating the true origin of Tool O'ween? :D

Or how many Tools can dance on the head of a pin?

Answer: only one Tool to a pin -- there's no way that Mark Driscoll (or Doug Phillips) would ever let anyone else onto their pins!

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I'm thinking the JesusTool and the JesusDouchebro should go into country music. They could form a duo and start singing oh so earnestly with that catch in their voices about how they've screwed up in their lives but their savior has now taken the wheel and is redeeming them. Oh, they're so misunderstood. Once so high but now they've fallen so far but it's okay because Jesus and their women stood by them the whole time.

Cue Beall and Grace. They come on stage in cowboy boots and bedazzled skirts and vests. The crowd goes wild as the ladies join them for a rockin version of Blake Shelton's "God Gave Me You," although some times they switch it up and use Rascal Flatts' "Bless the Broken Road," which also works.

JesusTool and JesusDouchebro put out a video that gets play on CMT. They go on the Christian talk show circuit and tell their story of their fall from grace and subsequent redemption. American sheeple eat it up. Guest spots on The Voice follow. Books. A CMA award with tearful acceptance speeches. JesusTool once again feels the sparkle of wonder and hears moar cellos all around him! Ohhhhhh Jesus!

But wait. There's trouble in Redemptionville, my friends. JesusDouchebro feels he was upstaged at the CMA awards show. JesusTool rambled on during his acceptance speech for a full 30 seconds longer than the producers had carefully instructed. JesusDouchebro abided by the limits (this time) but JesusTool was so moved by the Holy Spirit (and all those lights and cameras) that he couldn't help himself.

A nasty spat plays out in public. TMZ and Perez Hilton are there for every cutting remark about how "Somebody doesn't really know the meaning of redemption" and "Somebody likes to let fangirls see his tour bus." The feud escalates. There's allegations of infidelity on both sides. Beall and Grace finally have had enough. No more standing by their men; they lawyer up and take all the country music earnings. The boys are left with nothing more than what they started with.

JesusDouchebro retires to fishing hamlet in northwestern Washington. Trips to BC for the salmon run and occasional preaching gigs pay the bills. JesusTool flees to Bolivia where he tries again to start a church and swing from vines in an effort to relive his former hazardous ways. He never learns.

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Oh, to be a fly on the wall as a forensic accountant reviews Mars Hill's books. Let us pray that this season of dissolution allows the details of Pastor Mark's™ blessed golden parachute package to be made public.

Anyway, as my best friend always says, "More will be revealed."

Update: I was trying to explain this whole situation to DH. When I got to the part where Pastor Mark™ changed the church structure so DoucheBro was accountable only to himself,

DH says, "Oh, so he set himself up as the HMFiC."

Me: "What's HMFiC?"

DH: "Head MotherF**ker in Charge."

Snap!

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I'm thinking the JesusTool and the JesusDouchebro should go into country music. They could form a duo and start singing oh so earnestly with that catch in their voices about how they've screwed up in their lives but their savior has now taken the wheel and is redeeming them.

I see a lot of potential for Tool to assist DoucheBro in upgrading his wardrobe. I'm torn among gold lame, florid embroidery or crusted rhinestone options.

Fortunately, Nudie's of Hollywood Rodeo Tailors is still goin' strong.

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Don't know if this has been mentioned in any other Mars Hill/Mark Driscoll thread but a lot of info on MH/MD can be found on two blogs I've been following:

.patheos.com/blogs/warrenthrockmorton/

and

wenatcheethehatchet.blogspot.com/

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May the Twinkle of wonder be all around you this blessed day!!

I found/dragged that vid from it's vimeo obscurity!! *blatant brag/glory hunting*

Wonder what will happen next Tool O'Ween. So, Vi$ion Forum GONE, mars hill/driscoll GONE,

I am hoping Tool O'Ween 2015 will be the fall of the Duggars. Maybe one, or someone close, will "come out" with some stuff. Who knows?

Wish there was a cross hairs smiley.

MAY THE TWINKLE OF WONDER BE ALL ABOUT YOU.

Yeah I'm hoping for that too. Or Tool O'Ween could be the fall of Joel and Victoria Osteen.

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I'm still surprised that the three Seattle churches are being collapsed into Ballard , which is Convenient to nowhere.

I wonder how many of these churches can survive financially without the rest of the network .

Me, too. I think it's doubtful they will survive financially, since a lot of the church growth of MH was struggling churches who were absorbed into the megachurch. So now those churches are essentially being cut free again but probably with less resources and people and this whole mess to deal with. In fact, some of them (Sammamish MH, I know for sure) brought property with them when they came in as churches, but I imagine the property stays with MH.

I think it will be fractured and more people will get hurt. Several of the MH pastors who left MH a month or so ago are already starting church plants - one in the north side of the city and one in the Eastside). Shiny new websites that look EXACTLY LIKE MH's website but totally scrubbed of the MH connection. The pastor's bios are things liked "prior work at a large church." It's unfortunate.

I also wonder if they are somehow trying to mitigate liability by doing separating into smaller churches? On one of Throckmorton's blogs, somebody posted a link to Driscoll and another megachurch pastor talking about how "biblical" multi-site video churches are. :doh: Anyway, in it, they both talked about how their ministry would die with them - that they wouldn't be the guys who were on the radio or whatever after they had died. Which just struck me as weird and more of the narcissism. Like: if I'm not around to enjoy my fame....

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I also wonder if they are somehow trying to mitigate liability by doing separating into smaller churches?

Shorter version: If the corporation is dissolved, the corporate officers are off the hook for the financial stuff. Allegedly. I wait to see how this will be received by not just the congregation, but by those in Seattle who were already sick of Mark Driscoll and his BS.

One more thing: I am willing to place a small wager on the fact that Mark Driscoll has a deal with TLC for a show in less than a year. I'm also betting he's "starting over" in another state that would be friendly to his financial hijinks. Texas comes to mind.

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Shorter version: If the corporation is dissolved, the corporate officers are off the hook for the financial stuff. Allegedly. I wait to see how this will be received by not just the congregation, but by those in Seattle who were already sick of Mark Driscoll and his BS.

One more thing: I am willing to place a small wager on the fact that Mark Driscoll has a deal with TLC for a show in less than a year. I'm also betting he's "starting over" in another state that would be friendly to his financial hijinks. Texas comes to mind.

I'm not sure even Texas is big enough for Mark Driscoll's ego. It's already had to deal with DPIAT's. :?

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Shorter version: If the corporation is dissolved, the corporate officers are off the hook for the financial stuff. Allegedly. I wait to see how this will be received by not just the congregation, but by those in Seattle who were already sick of Mark Driscoll and his BS.

One more thing: I am willing to place a small wager on the fact that Mark Driscoll has a deal with TLC for a show in less than a year. I'm also betting he's "starting over" in another state that would be friendly to his financial hijinks. Texas comes to mind.

Yah, Houston seems like his kind of town, except the Osteens have already marked that territory.

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Maybe move south to Portland, OR, which must have the highest density of hipsters anywhere, even more than Seattle.

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