The "food stamp fridge"

[louisa05]

I can understand the reticence to cook, though I do sometimes enjoy it. It's a bit like exercise is for folks who don't like exercising. It's a basic human need, but many people really struggle to enjoy it, as much as they might try. Exercise is a way of life for me (and a necessary anxiety management tool), so I don't understand how people can hate it so much. But the fact that I like it doesn't make me any better-- it just means my hobby lines garners more respect.

I still wonder what city has gourmet food trucks that only sell free-range beef and don't use ANY processed foods. And apparently still manages to be cheaper than cooking at home.

I generally like to cook. But there are times when I am tired (hello...two days in a row with primary kids--who freak out a little when the regular teacher is not there--but I cooked dinner tonight. We budget every penny and spending what I make immediately by eating out on days I sub would not be smart). I get that there are times when everyone thinks, "ugh...now I have to get dinner". One of my tactics is that when I know I have a busy day coming, I cook a big meal that will have leftovers the day before. I go to my parents' house once or twice a week and it is an hour and half drive one way. I typically get home at dinner time. So I make something that will last us two meals the day before those days and just have to reheat when I get home.

What I don't get is how you declare acquiring and/or preparing food a "waste of time". Sorry to repeat myself, but how is meeting your own basic needs as a human a waste of your time? Do these people also deeply resent that it takes time out of their day to pee or to put on clothing?

[Firiel]

I generally like to cook. But there are times when I am tired (hello...two days in a row with primary kids--who freak out a little when the regular teacher is not there--but I cooked dinner tonight. We budget every penny and spending what I make immediately by eating out on days I sub would not be smart). I get that there are times when everyone thinks, "ugh...now I have to get dinner". One of my tactics is that when I know I have a busy day coming, I cook a big meal that will have leftovers the day before. I go to my parents' house once or twice a week and it is an hour and half drive one way. I typically get home at dinner time. So I make something that will last us two meals the day before those days and just have to reheat when I get home.

What I don't get is how you declare acquiring and/or preparing food a "waste of time". Sorry to repeat myself, but how is meeting your own basic needs as a human a waste of your time? Do these people also deeply resent that it takes time out of their day to pee or to put on clothing?

I sometimes resent having to take a shower. :embarrassed:

But I do see what you are saying. And as a single person, I have the ability to easily decide to eat cheese or eggs or oatmeal Ramen for dinner because I don't have kids depending on me. I have the luxury of only affecting myself if I neither want to cook nor pay to go out.

[happy atheist]

THERE YOU ARE. You asked me to point it out, there.

As to the 2nd question: I wasn't generalizing FJ people. *steps out and wipes feet

What the fuck does this even mean? If you weren't generalizing FJ people, who specifically are you referring to?

[utter solitude]

I sometimes resent having to take a shower. :embarrassed:

But I do see what you are saying. And as a single person, I have the ability to easily decide to eat cheese or eggs or oatmeal Ramen for dinner because I don't have kids depending on me. I have the luxury of only affecting myself if I neither want to cook nor pay to go out.

I resent showers too! Not so much the shower itself, but having to put on clothes and walk to the bathroom and having to deal with my hair and I'm always irrationally afraid someone will walk in on me... :?

I can totally understand not wanting to cook something. I ate a piece of pie for lunch earlier because I didn't feel like dealing with the stove or microwve :D :D :D

I guess it boils down to how much you're willing to do, ya know? I'm a lot more willing than some in the cooking/cleaning department. But I'm a lot less willing to, for example, spend all day shopping at the mall. it's just preference.

[whoviana]

As to peeing and all the other stuff: I feel the same way about brushing my teeth (I always play one song to take my mind off the freaking boredom), shower is only fun when there's both of us inside. Otherwise, just a necessity.

Necessary does not make things fun, enjoyable, or in cases, tolerable. Necessities are a must that must be done. EATING is a necessity. Cooking is optional. And we opt out.

PS we live in a country where cows actually grow outside, by the gajillions, it's not industrial meat that people consume and farming isn't done by humongous companies, free range is neither labeled as "gourmet" (LMFAO) or luxury. It's food. Whole, good, healthy food. We eat beef and veggies, not beluga caviar. Gourmet, that's rich, in a country which is full of farmlands and vineyards, chateau-s, prairies full of raw beef. I don't know what's happening in the US, but if 2 light snacks and one wholesome meal which consists of free range (=normal) beef (or other) and vegetables is considered "gourmet", something bad must be going down.

Why cook when you can buy your food ready made, and you can spend your time swimming, jogging, doing zumba, working out, reading, watching stuff, going to exhibitions (the list is endless) instead?

On the rare occasions that I cook, however, I always make sure it's something time-consuming but delicious, Japanese, Southern French/Corsican, Southern Italian, Indian (I keep failing), but that's a couple's activity and that's how we kill time on Sundays. Or national holidays when everything's closed and we can use some us-time. The food we make is "complicated", but worth it. Merely out of curiosity, and because we CHOOSE to, not because we must, and that changes everything. Complicated foods aren't necessarily expensive either. If you know a local fishery, fish farm where you can get fresh fish, you can make fantastic fish dishes. You get to know the farmers that live outside the city but within the vicinity, and you learn where your food is coming from. They usually share, especially the vineyards, whom they deliver their products, they even have certificates.

[whoviana]

What the fuck does this even mean? If you weren't generalizing FJ people, who specifically are you referring to?

Why are you so angry?

There was a name-calling and argument between me and obviously "utter solitude".

Do you always swear and curse when you get involved into other people's arguments?

[happy atheist]

Why are you so angry?

There was a name-calling and argument between me and obviously "utter solitude".

Do you always swear and curse when you get involved into other people's arguments?

I'm not angry. I'm bothered that you're screaming about FJ users calling you a bad housekeeper and a bad woman when I see no evidence of either.

And you're deflecting.

[whoviana]

First off: I wasn't screaming, bolding or using capslock.

Second: I should have known when you didn't bother to scroll back (in case you must get involved into other people's pointless arguments) that you were just looking for a fight for some reasons, yet I quoted utter solitude's comment where she doubts that I can run a household.

And, no one was generalizing "FJ users". You had to look for a fight with someone for some reasons, and you found me, meddling into two random people's convo. You were my guest, you very "happy" atheist... lol, I don't mind you at all : )))))))))

[whoviana]

Oh, and I'm not "deflecting". I just don't care about you, your very bad mood, and the lies you're cooking up. And, much as you'd wish, I'm not getting either defensive or angry : ))))) Still wondering tho', if you think you are a kindergarten teacher that must pick a favorite in every argument on here, and run in yelling F-words. Is that what your status grants you? Nice : )

[utter solitude]

First off: I wasn't screaming, bolding or using capslock.

Second: I should have known when you didn't bother to scroll back (in case you must get involved into other people's pointless arguments) that you were just looking for a fight for some reasons, yet I quoted utter solitude's comment where she doubts that I can run a household.

And, no one was generalizing "FJ users". You had to look for a fight with someone for some reasons, and you found me, meddling into two random people's convo. You were my guest, you very "happy" atheist... lol, I don't mind you at all : )))))))))

Please stop twisting my words. I was doubting that you "love" the complicated meals you don't cook. I never said anything about your household or how you run it, nor did I insult you. You did, however, later lowkey insult me. Let's keep facts straight, shall we? :)

[RosyDaisy]

WTH is going on? Who cares about eating out or cooking. This has got to be the silliest flame war since I've been on FJ. Seriously.

I have a small veggie garden and like to cook. It's just something I like to do. I also have days when I'm too tired to cook, so I eat out. There are lots of restaurants that serve healthy, nutritious food. So what if some people like eating out. It's none of my business.

[utter solitude]

[whoviana]

I stated that I can run my household perfectly fine. (You believe it or not, as much as I hate peeling potatoes or washing dishes, I wash up the damn floor twice a day on my knees and elbows since I have a fright of bacteria.)

Then, it did happen, you added a wink and stuff but you did state that you doubt I could run a household since I couldn't be bothered of cooking.

I did take it as an insult, especially since I'm lucky enough to have a man who doesn't enforce gender roles and I had a patriarchal d*ckwad for a father. I don't remember what was so insulting from my side since all I did was defend myself in an argument where I was called out for NOT COOKING. For a moment I thought it was fundieland reloaded. And yes, I'm keeping facts straight.

If you can't stand my guts, please do ignore me. I'm serious. Anything is better than random strangers wanting to make me find excuses for myself as to why we buy ready made dinner if we can afford it and none of us wants to cook during weekdays.

*THX RosyDaisy

[utter solitude]

I stated that I can run my household perfectly fine. (You believe it or not, as much as I hate peeling potatoes or washing dishes, I wash up the damn floor twice a day on my knees and elbows since I have a fright of bacteria.)

Then, it did happen, you added a wink and stuff but you did state that you doubt I could run a household since I couldn't be bothered of cooking.

I did take it as an insult, especially since I'm lucky enough to have a man who doesn't enforce gender roles and I had a patriarchal d*ckwad for a father. I don't remember what was so insulting from my side since all I did was defend myself in an argument where I was called out for NOT COOKING. For a moment I thought it was fundieland reloaded. And yes, I'm keeping facts straight.

If you can't stand my guts, please do ignore me. I'm serious. Anything is better than random strangers wanting to make me find excuses for myself as to why we buy ready made dinner if we can afford it and none of us wants to cook during weekdays.

*THX RosyDaisy

I NEVER said you couldn't run a household. I even said, more than once, that there's nothing wrong with buying premade food. I don't know where you're getting the insult from, as I don't see my statement as insulting. You insulted me later with the "pasta and hotdogs" crap, but that doesn't bother me in the slightest.

Long story short, I was not insulting you. The debate going on was whether or not it's cheaper to buy premade food as opposed to cooking. You don't wanna cook, you can afford to buy take everyday, and that's great. Truly. More power to you. It's not how I do things, for several reasons. We'll just have to agree to disagree. :)

[FakePigtails]

Seriously? The conversation went:

Nnnnnope, we just LURV our complicated meals. But if I have any other doubts about this otherwise well-functioning household, I'll pm you.

Clearly you don't, if you can't be bothered to make food yourself

She meant "Clearly you don't [lurv your complicated meals]" not "Clearly you don't [have a well-functioning household].

Not the most clear wording, but not justification for going off on her.

[whoviana]

Fine. But really... please don't "doubt" any of my abilities if you don't know where I come from, who I am, what I am or I am not capable of. Not even as a joke, with winks or kitties, because it is hurtful.

While we splurge on food, we make sacrifices in other areas. Each to their own.

Cooking home: the cost really does depend on what you're used to, what you like to eat, how many of you are there, etc.

Me stating that it's cheaper for the 2 of us to buy our steaks and side dish for dinner than buying the meat itself, the veggies and preparing it, was true in our case.

Still, if you can't stand me, do put me on ignore, in the meantime.

We can get away with our take away feasts because we are currently residing in a country that is considered "a developing country" and it is very agricultural. Were we residing in DC, or NY city, we would be resorting to low class Chinese takeouts, granted. But here, food literally grows on trees.

I'd like to continue this conversation after a change of tone, or discontinue it completely, since it's pointless. And also, just because it's a "snark forum", not everyone who doesn't fit in the "picture" whatever it is, doesn't beg to be picked on. Ramen.

[utter solitude]

Seriously? The conversation went:

She meant "Clearly you don't [lurv your complicated meals]" not "Clearly you don't [have a well-functioning household].

Not the most clear wording, but not justification for going off on her.

Maybe I should take this as a big hint to examine how I say things to hopefully not have misunderstandings...

whoviana, I think we have a huge misunderstanding here. I did not insult you. I never inferred anything about you other than you don't like to cook. Seriously. And there's nothing wrong with that. I never said or implied that you can't do something. I disagreed with you, is all. :D

I mean, if I could spend less money on the same food and not have to cook it, you can be damn sure I'd be all over that XD

[FakePigtails]

Fine. But really... please don't "doubt" any of my abilities if you don't know where I come from, who I am, what I am or I am not capable of. Not even as a joke, with winks or kitties, because it is hurtful.

While we splurge on food, we make sacrifices in other areas. Each to their own.

Cooking home: the cost really does depend on what you're used to, what you like to eat, how many of you are there, etc.

Me stating that it's cheaper for the 2 of us to buy our steaks and side dish for dinner than buying the meat itself, the veggies and preparing it, was true in our case.

Still, if you can't stand me, do put me on ignore, in the meantime.

We can get away with our take away feasts because we are currently residing in a country that is considered "a developing country" and it is very agricultural. Were we residing in DC, or NY city, we would be resorting to low class Chinese takeouts, granted. But here, food literally grows on trees.

I'd like to continue this conversation after a change of tone, or discontinue it completely, since it's pointless. And also, just because it's a "snark forum", not everyone who doesn't fit in the "picture" whatever it is, doesn't beg to be picked on. Ramen.

It would have helped immensely had you said that from the beginning, since 99.9% of people on this forum live in places where take-out meals are exorbitantly priced.

This is the second time in what, a week or two? that a new poster has left out significant information and then gotten upset when people disagreed with their assertion that doesn't actually apply to the vast majority, btw :doh:

[utter solitude]

I stated that I can run my household perfectly fine. (You believe it or not, as much as I hate peeling potatoes or washing dishes, I wash up the damn floor twice a day on my knees and elbows since I have a fright of bacteria.)

Me too... My roommates are a mess (imo, at least) and I am constantly wiping down counters and scrubbing floors behind them. Apparently they don't like it. :shhh:

[Three and Done]

*** This is a non-mod post ***

I would just like to remind everyone that tone and intent can be very difficult to determine through a post on the 'net. Misunderstandings are easy to come by...

I believe that it truly may not be "worth it" for some people to buy and prepare their food from scratch, and I also believe that the opposite may be true for others.

I started this thread, hoping for some serious debate on the stereotypes and attitudes behind the "food stamp fridge" meme. From what I have read, it went well at first, and I am hoping that we can return to those issues if this thread continues. :wink-kitty:

[whoviana]

Me too... My roommates are a mess (imo, at least) and I am constantly wiping down counters and scrubbing floors behind them. Apparently they don't like it. :shhh:

You won't believe this but you have to.

We have 3 different sets of clothing, depending on where we are and what we are doing.

We have our "outside" outfits, you know, jeans, jackets, jogwear, suits and stuff. And, the shoes.

As soon as we get home we get changed into our in-wears, that means that we change into clothes that we only wear inside the house - but NOT IN BED! And, we change into these clothes after a thorough shower and hairwash. In the meantime, the street shoes get disinfected.

Then, there's the bedwear, usually a pair of shorts and a t shirt or a sleeveless tee. If we decide to take a nap, watch a video, eat in bed or we go to sleep, we carefully peel off the in-wears, fold them and put them away. And, before we get into bed, we wipe our feet with baby wipes. I'm looking for a bat icon here, because while it feels clean and it is more reasonable when done than in written form, I think we are some new level of crazy when it comes to cleanliness. Guess how often we have guests over... :animals-fishblue: :angry-soapbox: Oh, I found some soap. That'll do the thing for now.

[utter solitude]

Here's an excellent article on the subject at hand

salon.com/2014/01/19/what_i_learned_from_a_week_on_food_stamps_paul_ryan_couldnt_be_any_more_wrong/

[happy atheist]

We live and work in a relatively nice residential area where there is a large selection of restaurants, but to be honest we don't mind popping by street vendors and pick up some masala with handmade flatbreads. I can't imagine messing up the kitchen with those delicious flatbreads, and the process also makes the house reek of oil and bread for a day. I gave it a try, even tho' we don't even have a large flat surface for those breads. Whatevs. I like to chat about food, and I was happy to find out that people here in general, think that what the Duggars eat is outrageously bad, and then whoomp, I get called a lousy HOUSEKEEPER (= bad wuman) for not willing to cook. Kinda left a bad taste in my mouth. Whatevs.

I'd just like to reiterate that nobody here equated "not cooking" with being a "bad woman" -- except you.

I wasn't looking for a fight, I was looking for facts. You were making some bold accusations and I didn't see the basis.

As for my "status" I assume you mean the fact that I'm an admin. That does not grant me special privileges when it comes to swearing. Everyone is allowed to drop as many f-bombs as they like. :dance: If I were responding as an admin I'd use my super-special giant red exclamation point formatting so there would be no question.

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Where the hell did you go to school that had kindergarten teachers picking favorites and yelling curse words? :o

[whoviana]

I started this thread, hoping for some serious debate on the stereotypes and attitudes behind the "food stamp fridge" meme. From what I have read, it went well at first, and I am hoping that we can return to those issues if this thread continues. :wink-kitty:

For sure! I really hope that my last (off-topic) post has settled the misunderstanding between me and U/S!

ON

May I just add that it is FANTASTIC to live in an agricultural area, where food is affordable, attainable, plenty. Even if it's labeled "poor". When your table (or fridge for that matter) is full, no matter how hard a time you're going through financially, it makes you feel like... you have most of what you need, I dunno how to express myself, but it is a fantastic feeling.

[utter solitude]

You won't believe this but you have to.

We have 3 different sets of clothing, depending on where we are and what we are doing.

We have our "outside" outfits, you know, jeans, jackets, jogwear, suits and stuff. And, the shoes.

As soon as we get home we get changed into our in-wears, that means that we change into clothes that we only wear inside the house - but NOT IN BED! And, we change into these clothes after a thorough shower and hairwash. In the meantime, the street shoes get disinfected.

Then, there's the bedwear, usually a pair of shorts and a t shirt or a sleeveless tee. If we decide to take a nap, watch a video, eat in bed or we go to sleep, we carefully peel off the in-wears, fold them and put them away. And, before we get into bed, we wipe our feet with baby wipes. I'm looking for a bat icon here, because while it feels clean and it is more reasonable when done than in written form, I think we are some new level of crazy when it comes to cleanliness. Guess how often we have guests over... :animals-fishblue: :angry-soapbox: Oh, I found some soap. That'll do the thing for now.

Oh I definitely believe you. We have clothes we wear in our space (ie, our room) and any clothing you wore outside of the house does NOT touch my bed! :sick: Shoes don't touch the carpet, they stay in a closet in the entry hall.

I'm having to learn to be less OCD about it, since we do have two roommates who are lazy as all hell. They just got a severe talkin to by the exhusband because we have ants again... because of them, and I refuse to continue to clean up after a woman in her mid 40s and a man in his mid 20s.

May I just add that it is FANTASTIC to live in an agricultural area, where food is affordable, attainable, plenty. Even if it's labeled "poor". When your table (or fridge for that matter) is full, no matter how hard a time you're going through financially, it makes you feel like... you have most of what you need, I dunno how to express myself, but it is a fantastic feeling.

I couldn't agree more about having a full fridge. when money/funds are low and the cupboards are bare, I always feel extra "down". But when shit is plentiful, it's like everything will be okay :D