Went to the Holy Land Experience Theme Park in Orlando

[AnywhereButHere]

Those pictures were awesome and totally made my night.

Stoner hippie Jesus with a kangaroo - Total Jesus Facebook shot captioned "Duuude, look at the kangaroo, man."

The gold horses lined up like they're about to run the Belmont.

Shalom? - They're not quite sure they want you there?

Who exactly is the guy in black casting a spell on Jesus?

Why were there hippos in the manger?

And why is there a lion wearing a sandwich board?

I just can't pick a favorite. :)

[Coco]

Those pictures were awesome and totally made my night.

Stoner hippie Jesus with a kangaroo - Total Jesus Facebook shot captioned "Duuude, look at the kangaroo, man."

The gold horses lined up like they're about to run the Belmont.

Shalom? - They're not quite sure they want you there?

Who exactly is the guy in black casting a spell on Jesus?

Why were there hippos in the manger?

And why is there a lion wearing a sandwich board?

I just can't pick a favorite. :)

i noticed that too, darn that we can't read it. :lol: i'd seriously get evicted from the place for laughing at everything.

[Coco]

YAY! :dance:

Just right click on the image, save to desktop. Go to your user control panel, click edit avatar, and choose this image from your desktop.

(I won't be offended if you don't use it, it turned out kind of wonky from the compression lol)

Maybe someone else with more skill and better tools than MS Paint can do a better job :lol:

[doubleT]

Thank you for sharing your experience and pictures. I have never heard of this place. Just weird. I wish the golden horse and angel thing was set up. Just seemed strange to see it laying there.

Didn't look like there was anyone there.

Unfortunately, it did look just like something TBN would build. I'm sure with some elderly widows last penny.

[notsocommon]

I'm thinking that we can come up with a few good phrases from this place......like "holy disco hippo" or " holy Adam with a kangaroo!"

I am not that creative, but it is just a random thought that may or may not be packing induced delirium....

I really do like "Holy Disco Hippo!" Though. Imma gonna meme that!

[notsocommon]

[attachment=0]Holy-Land-Experience-2.jpg[/attachment]

Just right click on the image, save to desktop. Go to your user control panel, click edit avatar, and choose this image from your desktop.

(I won't be offended if you don't use it, it turned out kind of wonky from the compression lol)

Maybe someone else with more skill and better tools than MS Paint can do a better job :lol:

Thanks!

[Peas n carrots]

The park really is a parody of itself isn't it? It takes all the work out of snarking.

[snarkopolis]

Thanks for the pictures. I have some thoughts.

1. There are some four year olds who want their sparkle glitter kit back--now!!!!

2. I am on Team Hippo as well, and why a sparkly hippo/lamb?

3. Cardboard Jesus walking on water?

4. All those horses--are we sure they weren't getting ready to race (#11)?

5. Caesar's Palace wants their throne chairs back--NOW!

6. Farmer tan Adam is high trust me.

7. I could never go to that place because if a picture of me there got out I'd be committed by my family.

8. Shalom? ??????

9. It's a vagina tunnel.

10. This is a place where medicinal herbs must be consumed before going otherwise.......

11. At the last supper Jesus (and his disciples) had apples and bananas?

[Black Aliss]

A thousand thank yous! This is awesome. I don't know why, but cardboard Jesus walking on water is my favorite. It made me snort-laugh!

That, and the disco ball sheep hippo.

[ViolaSebastian]

[attachment=0]Holy-Land-Experience-2.jpg[/attachment]

Just right click on the image, save to desktop. Go to your user control panel, click edit avatar, and choose this image from your desktop.

(I won't be offended if you don't use it, it turned out kind of wonky from the compression lol)

Maybe someone else with more skill and better tools than MS Paint can do a better job :lol:

I'm so sad that biker Jesus as an avatar happened after I filled out my Snarkie Nomination for best avatar! Know I love it, though!

[Eater of Worlds]

Jesus badly needed a haircut. His ends were all scraggly. I think I'll call him Scraggly Jesus.

[johnhugh]

I had forgotten that the Holy Land experience was the brainchild of jan Crouch but as soon as i saw the pictures and description I remembered - who else could be responsible for so much pink, mirrors, brass, and gaudiness as the pink haired lady, herself?

Incidentally, it is rumored that hippy Jesus is jan's personal boy toy. Though I have trouble believing it to be true as I can't believe there is enough money in the world to make even the most hardened jigalow want to willing engage in 'sweet fellowship' with Jan. :ew:

I'd heard about the boy toy rumours too. Ever since TBN bought the park she has been living in the area and further rumours were that she was and Paul lived completely separate lives.

[formergothardite]

I do not want to think about Jan with a boy toy. How desperate would you have to be to be that woman's boy toy?

[Cats B4 Quivers]

What an amazing mess of a theme park! I added it to my "must go" places to visit one day. It joins the Creationist museum in Kentucky and Dollywood in Tennessee on our east side of the continent tour.

I have a bone to pick with one of the exhibits. Ok, I have many bones to pick and they all make me laugh. But the picture of the polar bear and penguins... I'd love to know how Jesus traveled to the North Pole to gather the polar bear and the trip to the South Pole to pick up the penguin. The bible is missing these details. :wink-penguin: :popcorn2:

[Lady Grass Lake]

There was a huge golden chariot next to the horses, and the angel looks posed to be the driver, I'm thinking maybe something at the entrance or that could be seen from the highway. This place is right on the highway, you can't miss that big coloseum type building and the big sign.

I can see jeweled reigns connecting the whole thing together. They had big steel plates on the feet of the horses. I though I had a photo of the chariot but I must have missed it.

We were there on a Wednesday early in May, from about 1 - 4 p.m. and only saw a bunch people at the big stage show in the church/theater. Maybe 300 or so. Plush purple chairs inside, a jeweled curtain, lots of lights, and purple purple everywhere. When we walked around it seemed we were the only ones in the place except for the staff, all dressed in costumes.

[Peas n carrots]

There was a huge golden chariot next to the horses, and the angel looks posed to be the driver, I'm thinking maybe something at the entrance or that could be seen from the highway. This place is right on the highway, you can't miss that big coloseum type building and the big sign.

I can see jeweled reigns connecting the whole thing together. They had big steel plates on the feet of the horses. I though I had a photo of the chariot but I must have missed it.

We were there on a Wednesday early in May, from about 1 - 4 p.m. and only saw a bunch people at the big stage show in the church/theater. Maybe 300 or so. Plush purple chairs inside, a jeweled curtain, lots of lights, and purple purple everywhere. When we walked around it seemed we were the only ones in the place except for the staff, all dressed in costumes.

I may have missed this upthread, but are there any roller coasters or any kind of rides at all there? Otherwise, I can't imagine it being terribly appealing to anyone but the most fundie families.

[Coco]

There was a huge golden chariot next to the horses, and the angel looks posed to be the driver, I'm thinking maybe something at the entrance or that could be seen from the highway. This place is right on the highway, you can't miss that big coloseum type building and the big sign.

I can see jeweled reigns connecting the whole thing together. They had big steel plates on the feet of the horses. I though I had a photo of the chariot but I must have missed it.

We were there on a Wednesday early in May, from about 1 - 4 p.m. and only saw a bunch people at the big stage show in the church/theater. Maybe 300 or so. Plush purple chairs inside, a jeweled curtain, lots of lights, and purple purple everywhere. When we walked around it seemed we were the only ones in the place except for the staff, all dressed in costumes.

oh my gosh next time wad up a sheet in your bag and pin it on after you get in there and see if you can go backstage. :lol:

[toejamflipflop]

Holy Shit. After laughing my ass off I went through some of your pictures and saw Trinity Broadcasting Network name which was started by Paul Crouch and Jim and Tammy Bakker. This was Jim Bakkers dream park . Paul Crouch pulled a coup and got rid of the Bakkers ( who started PTL and Heritage USA) because the Bakkers were becoming more popular than him and his wife Jan. There was a lot of behind the scene politics going on between Jim and Paul at that time. I remember it well. Crouch stole many of Jimmy s ideas. Back to the park. Oh I wish I had been there with you. I would be creating havic and raising all kinds of hell.

[Lady Grass Lake]

No Rides, lots of shows though, and gift shops too. The Kids area had the climbing wall. I was just thinking to myself how sexist the climbing wall is, imagining only guys in pants climbing the wall, because a skirt or frumper and a climbing wall would not be allowed for the ladies.