Let's blame women for rape

[snuggles911]

I read something today that made my blood boil. returnofqueens.com/womens-responsibility-in-preventing-rape/

The blog is written by a collection of anti-feminist female bloggers who write under pseudonyms. Several appear to be fundie lite while others don't seem to be religious.

Anyway, in this post, a writer named Keely Scott contends that rape statistics are exaggerated:

Its sad that I as a woman would even dare to speak out about the possibility that “rape culture†is a farce. I became rape culture aware slowly after having heard too many stories about women who’ve cried rape, but were found to be lying later on.

In short, I have a hard time believing women when they say they were raped unless I know them personally, or it can be proven with DNA.

She also believes that women should do more to prevent rape:

Does a woman have any responsibility in the prevention of her getting raped? Yes, she does.

I don’t care what rape hustlers tell you about how women are never responsible for their own rapes. They are flat out wrong. Its true that there are men out there who stalk women, and violently rape them even if they’re wearing a turtleneck shirt, or big blousing clothing. Women have been raped who’ve not been at a bar getting drunk, or walking alone down a ghetto street after dark. But, there are many women who bring a lot of their own pain and agony on themselves.

If there really is such a huge rape problem, you would think women would wise up and take measures to make sure it doesn’t happen to them. Also, you would think the numbers of rapes being talked about in media would match current rape statistics. It doesn’t add up.

Ladies, take responsibility for your own safety:

By dressing, and acting like a slut, you are conveying that you are promiscuous. Don’t give me that crap about, “I can dress however I want! I’m not a slut! I’m not trying to signal to men I want to have sex with them!†You are. You are seeking sexual attention, and you may just get it, but you might not like how it all goes.

You are increasing your chances of something you regret happening if you are intoxicated.

Do I feel sorry for the women who go out in public dressed like prostitutes, and act like them too, then get raped? No I don’t. Not one bit.

Ladies, if you even are a lady, then you will need to take at least some responsibility for your own safety. If you don’t want to get raped, then don’t act in a way that puts you at risk for that happening. Does it make sense to you that you should have reasonable expectations of not getting raped if you are putting out signals that you actually want that to happen? I have no pity for any of you if such violence occurs against you because you created the situation which compromised your safety.

I thought Sunshine Mary was an evil rape apologist, but this woman takes the cake. I hope she doesn't have daughters.

[DuggarsTheEndIsNear]

I've been raped on two or three occasions. You may be wondering "wouldn't you know for sure how many times you were raped?" No I don't.

I'm not sure if the first rape happened or not. By that I mean I have absolutely NO memory of anything except my friends convincing me that the guy wanted to apologize for something he'd done, dropping me off at his dorm room, and him asking if I wanted something to drink. (I don't even remember how I responded to that. I want to say I was smart enough to say no, but then I'm not sure.) I don't even know how/when I got back to my own dorm. I just know a few years later, he said he didn't know why we didn't hook up again after that night. When I said we most definitely didn't hook up, he proceeded to tell me that we did and he described what I look like naked, right down to a birth make that you can't see unless I'm naked.

The other two times, I was raped by "friends." And both guys were people I had known for at least a year or longer.

So, I'm fairly certain I can say it had nothing to do with me drinking (I don't drink alcohol because it gives me panic attacks until the alcohol has completely cleared my system), what I wore (I've never been one to wear anything remotely "slutty" and rarely wear "sexy" clothes because I'm really self conscious), or because I was in unsavory places.

[Letgo]

A relative of mine has an in-law who was raped. She was a widow, in her 80s, in her own bed, asleep. A man broke in and raped her. Was her flannel nightgown too slutty? Her gray hair too alluring?

This type of garbage rape message blaming the victim makes my blood boil. A woman ought to be able to run naked down the street and not be afraid of being raped. (Not advising this, but I'm just sayin') Clothing, or lack of it, is not an invitation to rape. Nor is being out late, drinking, dancing, etc. Some behaviors may not be wise in ways unrelated to rape, but they do not cause or invite rape. Rape is the fault of the rapist. Period.

[ADoyle90815]

There was a serial rapist in my city who broke into homes of his victims when they were sleeping in their beds. I guess by that logic, all women should put bars on their windows and have several deadbolts on their doors, since it would prevent them from being raped. If it means they die in a house fire, those assholes would say that at least they didn't allow themselves to be raped.

[Talitha Cumi]

What makes me fume is that the assumption is that rape is just a danger that exists out there somewhere. It's like an earthquake or a heavy snowstorm. Didn't evacuate when the hurricane hit? You had only yourself to blame. (Not even getting into the people who couldn't evacuate during Katrina.) Live in Tornado Alley? What are you doing living in such a dangerous spot? Got raped? Why were you out there in the Rape Caves?

A human being makes the choice to rape. The problem is not with women who don't protect themselves from rapists, it's with the rapists. So no, women aren't responsible for their own rapes. The people who rape them are the ones responsible.

[samurai_sarah]

Rape is always the rapists' fault.

[GolightlyGrrl]

This sub-human creatures make me so stabby that I created a new name for them-cundie. Cunt + fundie=cundie. Sorry for being so damn offensive but I just can't take these victim blaming, rape apologists anymore.

[Three and Done]

Sounds like she forgot part of the usual bullshit rape apologist garbage - "You can't be raped by any man you've willingly had sex with before."

I wonder if she would blame a MAN for being murdered because he was "walking alone down a ghetto street after dark."?

[Chowder Head]

She also forgot , the husband can not rape his wife.

[DuggarsTheEndIsNear]

Sounds like she forgot part of the usual bullshit rape apologist garbage - "You can't be raped by any man you've willingly had sex with before."

I wonder if she would blame a MAN for being murdered because he was "walking alone down a ghetto street after dark."?

I just had a revolting thought. What if purity is such a big thing for fundies because they believe a woman can't say no to someone she already had sex with and that he can't rape her. Therefore, a girl that's slept with someone before would have to cheat on her husband if the first man showed up?

[Toothfairy]

I was reading a blog that said if women like sex more than men then rape is just rough sex. Women like rough sex. As soon as I read that I'm like wtf is wrong with these people who think like that. If rape were to happen to them I bet they would sing a different tune.

[DuggarsTheEndIsNear]

I was reading a blog that said if women like sex more than men then rape is just rough sex. Women like rough sex. As soon as I read that I'm like wtf is wrong with these people who think like that. If rape were to happen to them I bet they would sing a different tune.

Not necessarily. There are MANY ways of reacting to abuse. The most common is to blame yourself. If these women were raped, its most likely that they would blame themselves, not blame the perpetrator.

[Khan]

This reminds me of the bullshit a priest once told me. "No honorable woman would ever put herself in a position to be raped. If it happens to you then you deserve it. God protects virtuous women."

[doggie]

[neuroticcat]

:pink-shock: This is so vile.

[DGayle]

This reminds me of the bullshit a priest once told me. "No honorable woman would ever put herself in a position to be raped. If it happens to you then you deserve it. God protects virtuous women."

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/world/n ... -1.1606825

God really protected that nun from the parish priest. Can you get more religiously virtuous than a nun?

Sad, tragic story all-around.

[docmom]

So, by logical extension of this argument, if you walk down a road with a purse you are asking to be mugged. It is not the mugger's fault. It's yours. Muggers want money and you are flaunting it! If you are wearing a watch, you asking for it to be stolen and let's not even get into wearing jewelry- totally fair game, right?

[DuggarsTheEndIsNear]

So, by logical extension of this argument, if you walk down a road with a purse you are asking to be mugged. It is not the mugger's fault. It's yours. Muggers want money and you are flaunting it! If you are wearing a watch, you asking for it to be stolen and let's not even get into wearing jewelry- totally fair game, right?

That's different. The bible says not to steal. I can't think of anywhere it says not to rape.

[Three and Done]

Quick Google search - first result.

Deuteronomy 22:25 "But if a man find a betrothed damsel in the field, and the man force her, and lie with her: then the man only that lay with her shall die:"

[DuggarsTheEndIsNear]

Quick Google search - first result.

Deuteronomy 22:25 "But if a man find a betrothed damsel in the field, and the man force her, and lie with her: then the man only that lay with her shall die:"

That's betrothed, which was their term for engaged. You were STEALING a mans property. Again, going back to stealing is wrong, but rape isn't.

[Three and Done]

That's betrothed, which was their term for engaged. You were STEALING a mans property. Again, going back to stealing is wrong, but rape isn't.

Yes, I know. I should have added more to my post - I suppose I assumed that my point was clear. :wink-kitty:

[Miggy]

Anyway, in this post, a writer named Keely Scott contends that rape statistics are exaggerated:

.

How is DNA going to prove rape? It can certainly prove two people had sex but how does she think it is going to determine whether or not there was consent?

[Lawsome]

How is DNA going to prove rape? It can certainly prove two people had sex but how does she think it is going to determine whether or not there was consent?

Ironic statistic, I took a class in sexual assault law a couple years ago. Unless the attacker was unidentified (which is rare in sexual assault cases), DNA evidence has been shown to not increase convictions rates (in Canada anyway). Exact reason identified here is likely why.

[polecat]

Not necessarily. There are MANY ways of reacting to abuse. The most common is to blame yourself. If these women were raped, its most likely that they would blame themselves, not blame the perpetrator.

Actually, one of the authors at RoQ was indeed raped at 16 by an adult male. And she did indeed blame herself. It was a sad story.

Possible triggers:

We smoked pot, drank shots, and got really wasted. I got so inebriated that I had to go lay down in Ron’s bed for a while. I don’t know how long I was there, but when I woke up he was there with me in bed. Without getting too graphic, he took my clothes off, and we did it. Rather, he did me. I knew what was going on. I was sober enough by this time to be able to fight him off me, or to say no, or to scream or something. I didn’t though. For some reason, I just let him have his way with me. It probably had something to do with what Mary had told me. Did I feel obligated to allow him his pleasure? Was I too afraid to try to stop him? To this day, I still don’t know the answer to those questions. It just happened, and I wrote it off like it was my decision, like it was what girlfriends and boyfriends do when they get to a certain point in their relationship. I didn’t cry rape, because I didn’t say no. I felt it was my fault for allowing it to happen in the first place. In a way, it was.

[mypsychoticself]

Actually, one of the authors at RoQ was indeed raped at 16 by an adult male. And she did indeed blame herself. It was a sad story.

Possible triggers:

We smoked pot, drank shots, and got really wasted. I got so inebriated that I had to go lay down in Ron’s bed for a while. I don’t know how long I was there, but when I woke up he was there with me in bed. Without getting too graphic, he took my clothes off, and we did it. Rather, he did me. I knew what was going on. I was sober enough by this time to be able to fight him off me, or to say no, or to scream or something. I didn’t though. For some reason, I just let him have his way with me. It probably had something to do with what Mary had told me. Did I feel obligated to allow him his pleasure? Was I too afraid to try to stop him? To this day, I still don’t know the answer to those questions. It just happened, and I wrote it off like it was my decision, like it was what girlfriends and boyfriends do when they get to a certain point in their relationship. I didn’t cry rape, because I didn’t say no. I felt it was my fault for allowing it to happen in the first place. In a way, it was.

That's just sad. And the fact that she still blames herself really worries me.